History Quotes / AntiClimax

!!Web Original

->''"You've dashed my hopes yet again."''
-->-- '''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''', in reaction to the easy defeat of a cool-looking white-faced ninja in ''Film/ThreeNinjas''.

->''"We waited three fucking hours for ''that!?''"''
-->-- '''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''', in reaction to the monster's final form in ''Literature/{{It}}''.

->''"Nothing keeps a story alive more than an ending no one likes. When a big story ends with a thud, people will always wonder how it could have been done better. What happened with this Clone Saga is a prime example of how not to do a story, or a ''Spider-Man'' story."''
-->-- '''Editor/Writer Glenn Greenberg''' on ''ComicBook/TheCloneSaga''

->''"To call it an anticlimax would be an insult not only to climaxes [[InsultToRocks but to prefixes.]]"''

->''"There’s a rogue Russian General. There’s a weird-accented smuggling dude. There’s his silent Indian henchman. There’s yo-yo buzzsaw man. There’s the creepy knife-throwing twins. And, you know what? Not one of them has a memorable death sequence. The film just meanders from one death to the next. It’s like ''[[Film/TheLordOfTheRingsTheReturnOfTheKing Lord of the Rings: Return of the King]]'' if you substituted “pointless villain deaths” for “fake endings"...And who can forget the ending? [[CausticCritic Me, that’s who.]]"''

->''"Imagine a car that hums along well enough despite hitting some potholes but suddenly bursts into flames, trapping and suffocating some [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot valuables]] within."''

->''"''Legend''[='s=] final showdown is a worse catalog of disaster than ''Skymall For Supervillains''. Chun-Li defeats her mortal enemy by accident, knocking cement powder from an [[NoOSHACompliance utterly unexplained building site]] in the heart of Bison's fortress into his eyes. He staggers around like a crippled Make-a-Wish kid whose final desire was to be a guest villain in ''Film/HomeAlone'', waiting a full five minutes until Chun-Li [[ClapYourHandsIfYouBelieve believes in herself hard enough]] to throw a fireball, despite having absolutely no reason to do that instead of just walking over and kicking him."''

->''"'There can be only one' was just a saying without meaning. The Source could only be accessed by [[CareBearStare the pure of heart]], and its only reward was to give the 'winner' [[BabiesEverAfter a fucking baby]]. All the suffering, the angst, the lost loves of the series meant nothing. Connor [=MacLeod=] fought the Kurgan for ''nothing'', because the Kurgan could never have entered the Source because he wasn’t pure of heart. Duncan and Methos teaming up to stop the Four Horsemen meant ''nothing'', because the world [[TheWorldIsAlwaysDoomed still fell into chaos]] and Kronos could never have accessed the Source. Darius dying meant ''nothing'' because the thing James Horton feared – that immortals would one day rule mankind – could never have come to pass because the Source offered no power and no wisdom; it offered nothing beyond the chance to have a fucking baby...Believe it or not, this movie was not made by people who wanted to permanently kill the ''Franchise/{{Highlander}}'' franchise. This was supposed to be a trilogy, theoretically kicking off a new generation of immortals [[YoungerAndHipper led by Duncan’s kid]]. If there is anything to be thankful about this movie, it’s that it was so bad that it [[FranchiseKiller finally killed the franchise once and for all.]]"''

->''"Whoever responsible was clearly taking a page out of [[Creator/CharlieSheen Charlie 'I’ve already got your money, dude' Sheen’s]] playbook, except at least the unhinged actor didn’t beg his disgruntled audience to see his next one-man show that he promised would totally be worth it, honest!"''
-->-- '''''{{Website/Wrestlecrap}}''''', [[http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/18-seconds/ "Sheamus Vs. Daniel Bryan - How long should this world title last? LOL, I'll pretend you said 18 seconds"]]

->''"Mary Jane, once to be praised for being long-suffering and basically always putting up with [[Franchise/SpiderMan her husband]], suddenly seems like she should’ve [[KnowWhenToFoldEm gone out for cigarettes]] and never came back years ago, if this is how their relationship was going to end up."''

->''"It certainly has a better ending than ''[[{{VideoGame/Bioshock1}} Bioshock]]'', which [[DamnedByFaintPraise isn't saying a whole lot.]] A situation wherein a man with a gun is ordering you to dig a shallow grave in the woods would probably end better than [=BioShock 1=] did."''
-->-- '''''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''''' on ''VideoGame/BioshockInfinite''

->''"The game's ending, though, comes as suddenly as a stick of dynamite in one's breakfast cereal: unexpected, pointless, and ultimately damaging to the experience."''

->''"There's no final boss, no climatic showdown or escape sequence, or melodramatic twists. The game just ends right when they run out of ideas...And you know what? This is a problem that ''{{VideoGame/Doom}}'' avoided simply by having no story at all. [[NoPlotNoProblem BRILLIANT!]] Y'know, maybe this should be, like, a rule or something: Don't make a story driven game [[CaptainObvious if your story isn't very good.]] ''Rage'' doesn't just end when those credits roll; it dies."''
-->--'''George Weidman''' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMdJhP9UWcE on]] ''VideoGame/{{Rage}}''

->''"I kinda thought it would all come together in some sort of sappy Jesus-loving ending, but it turns out it just didn't come together at all."''
-->-- '''WebVideo/{{Retsupurae}}''' on ''[[VideoGame/TheTrappedTrilogy Escape]]''

->''"They're splicing in old soundtracks and clips in such a way to make new footage. This is the bottoming out of the series. All the budgets are GONE, and we're left with this attempt at an ending. In short, it's becoming another [[ClipShow clip episode]]...It's rumored that the writer/director, Creator/HideakiAnno, got death threats over this ending. I can see why."''

->''"To imply that this is anything worthy of being called an "Endgame" is like implying a grand game of Chess exists between a stoner who wants a Cinnabon, and the mall cop who shoo'ed him away for peeing in the trash bin next to Sbarro's."''
-->-- '''{{Website/SFDebris}}''' on ''Series/StarTrekVoyager'', "Endgame"

->''"It's time to check in with Jonas, AKA [[TheMole Weaselly Traitor Dude]], as he gets in touch with his Kazon co-conspirators. I wouldn't worry too much about this scene... Oh, and in the off chance you do bother watching every episode in this scintillating plot arc, don't expect anything like a satisfying conclusion. Actually, that applies to just about any episode of this show. If you're watching ''Voyager'' expecting a satisfying conclusion to anything, you're going to be one emotionally desolate person by the time it's all over. Absolutely nothing was concluded satisfactorily on ''Voyager'', including the whole damn series itself. But "Endgame" is a bitchfest for another time."''

->''"The Master has finally defeated the Doctor…by plugging in a few wires ''[[PokeThePoodle hehehehehe]]''. That would have been a crap defeat."''

->''"The steady decline of the show was served well by the ending but only in the poetic justice sort of way that [[SeasonalRot karma caught up with it.]]"''

->''And then we found it! After working our butts off in this adventure, after collecting every stinking Power Cell in this entire crazy world, clawing [[SmallNameBigEgo my]] paws to the bone, we got...that's right; drum roll please...ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! ZIPPO! NADDA! Hello? That sucked! That suuuuuucked! I'll send you my therapy bill, and a receipt for the broken game controller!''

->"So that's it. He just gives him a paper and walks away? No fight scene, no car chase, no gun battle, no jump kicks? Lame."
-->-- '''Jax Jonez''' regarding an intentional example, ''Machinima/RedVsBlue'', "Nightmare on Planet Evil"

-->-- '''Jax Jonez''' regarding an intentional example, ''Machinima/RedVsBlue'', "Nightmare on Planet Evil"

-->--''WebComic/EightBitTheater'', [[http://www.nuklearpower.com/2009/05/21/episode-1130-so-close-yet-so-far/ "So Close Yet So Far"]]

->''"There’s a rogue Russian General. There’s a weird-accented smuggling dude. There’s his silent Indian henchman. There’s yo-yo buzzsaw man. There’s the creepy knife-throwing twins. And, you know what? Not one of them has a memorable death sequence. The film just meanders from one death to the next. It’s like ''[[Film/TheLordOfTheRings Lord of the Rings: Return of the King]]'' if you substituted “pointless villain deaths” for “fake endings"...And who can forget the ending? [[CausticCritic Me, that’s who.]]"''

->''"Mary Jane, once to be praised for being long-suffering and basically always putting up with [[SpiderMan her husband]], suddenly seems like she should’ve [[KnowWhenToFoldEm gone out for cigarettes]] and never came back years ago, if this is how their relationship was going to end up."''

-->--'''[[Franchise/JakAndDaxter Daxter]]''', recounting the first ''VideoGame/JakAndDaxter's'' ending.

----

-->--'''[[Franchise/JakAndDaxter Daxter]]''', recounting the first game's ending.

->'''And then we found it! After working our butts off in this adventure, after collecting every stinking Power Cell in this entire crazy world, clawing [[SmallNameBigEgo my]] paws to the bone, we got...that's right; drum roll please...ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! ZIPPO! NADDA! Hello? That sucked! That suuuuuucked! I'll send you my therapy bill, and a receipt for the broken game controller!

->'''Green Shirt:''' Are you waiting to get some punch?
->'''Yellow Shirt:''' No, they're still setting it up.
->'''Green Shirt:''' Then where's the punch line?
->'''Yellow Shirt:''' I don't think there is one.
-->-- A complete comic strip from ''WebComic/CyanideAndHappiness''

->You've dashed my hopes yet again.
-->--'''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''', in reaction to the easy defeat of a cool-looking white-faced ninja in ''Film/ThreeNinjas''.

->Nothing keeps a story alive more than an ending no one likes. When a big story ends with a thud, people will always wonder how it could have been done better. What happened with this Clone Saga is a prime example of how not to do a story, or a ''Spider-Man'' story.
-->--'''Editor/Writer Glenn Greenberg''' on ''ComicBook/TheCloneSaga''

->To call it an anticlimax would be an insult not only to climaxes [[InsultToRocks but to prefixes.]]

->There’s a rogue Russian General. There’s a weird-accented smuggling dude. There’s his silent Indian henchman. There’s yo-yo buzzsaw man. There’s the creepy knife-throwing twins. And, you know what? Not one of them has a memorable death sequence. The film just meanders from one death to the next. It’s like ''[[Film/TheLordOfTheRings Lord of the Rings: Return of the King]]'' if you substituted “pointless villain deaths” for “fake endings"...And who can forget the ending? [[CausticCritic Me, that’s who.]]
-->--'''[[http://them0vieblog.com/2011/01/18/non-review-review-octopussy/ Darren Mooney]]''' on ''{{Film/Octopussy}}''

->Imagine a car that hums along well enough despite hitting some potholes but suddenly bursts into flames, trapping and suffocating some [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot valuables]] within.
-->--'''Brett Gallman''' [[http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=24698&reviewer=429 on]] ''Film/FantasticFour2015''

->''Legend''[='s=] final showdown is a worse catalog of disaster than ''Skymall For Supervillains''. Chun-Li defeats her mortal enemy by accident, knocking cement powder from an [[NoOSHACompliance utterly unexplained building site]] in the heart of Bison's fortress into his eyes. He staggers around like a crippled Make-a-Wish kid whose final desire was to be a guest villain in ''Film/HomeAlone'', waiting a full five minutes until Chun-Li [[ClapYourHandsIfYouBelieve believes in herself hard enough]] to throw a fireball, despite having absolutely no reason to do that instead of just walking over and kicking him.
-->--'''''{{Website/Cracked}}''''', [[http://www.cracked.com/article_18605_7-baffling-moments-from-worst-video-game-movie-ever.html#ixzz33YKAqg4F on]] ''Film/StreetFighterTheLegendOfChunLi''

->'There can be only one' was just a saying without meaning. The Source could only be accessed by [[CareBearStare the pure of heart]], and its only reward was to give the 'winner' [[BabiesEverAfter a fucking baby]]. All the suffering, the angst, the lost loves of the series meant nothing. Connor [=MacLeod=] fought the Kurgan for ''nothing'', because the Kurgan could never have entered the Source because he wasn’t pure of heart. Duncan and Methos teaming up to stop the Four Horsemen meant ''nothing'', because the world [[TheWorldIsAlwaysDoomed still fell into chaos]] and Kronos could never have accessed the Source. Darius dying meant ''nothing'' because the thing James Horton feared – that immortals would one day rule mankind – could never have come to pass because the Source offered no power and no wisdom; it offered nothing beyond the chance to have a fucking baby...Believe it or not, this movie was not made by people who wanted to permanently kill the ''Franchise/{{Highlander}}'' franchise. This was supposed to be a trilogy, theoretically kicking off a new generation of immortals [[YoungerAndHipper led by Duncan’s kid]]. If there is anything to be thankful about this movie, it’s that it was so bad that it [[FranchiseKiller finally killed the franchise once and for all.]]
-->--'''''[[http://www.screamsheet.wordpress.com/2011/01/27/highlander-the-source-part-one/ The Screamsheet]]''''' on ''Film/HighlanderTheSource''

->Whoever responsible was clearly taking a page out of [[Creator/CharlieSheen Charlie 'I’ve already got your money, dude' Sheen’s]] playbook, except at least the unhinged actor didn’t beg his disgruntled audience to see his next one-man show that he promised would totally be worth it, honest!

->Mary Jane, once to be praised for being long-suffering and basically always putting up with [[SpiderMan her husband]], suddenly seems like she should’ve [[KnowWhenToFoldEm gone out for cigarettes]] and never came back years ago, if this is how their relationship was going to end up.
-->--'''David Brothers''' on ''ComicBook/OneMoreDay'', [[http://comicsalliance.com/the-worst-comics-of-the-decade-part-2/?trackback=tsmclip "The 15 Worst Comics of the Decade"]]

->It certainly has a better ending than ''[[{{VideoGame/Bioshock1}} Bioshock]]'', which [[DamnedByFaintPraise isn't saying a whole lot.]] A situation wherein a man with a gun is ordering you to dig a shallow grave in the woods would probably end better than [=BioShock 1=] did.
-->--'''''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''''' on ''VideoGame/BioshockInfinite''

->The game's ending, though, comes as suddenly as a stick of dynamite in one's breakfast cereal: unexpected, pointless, and ultimately damaging to the experience.

->There's no final boss, no climatic showdown or escape sequence, or melodramatic twists. The game just ends right when they run out of ideas...And you know what? This is a problem that ''{{VideoGame/Doom}}'' avoided simply by having no story at all. [[NoPlotNoProblem BRILLIANT!]] Y'know, maybe this should be, like, a rule or something: Don't make a story driven game [[CaptainObvious if your story isn't very good.]] ''Rage'' doesn't just end when those credits roll; it dies.

->'''Proteus:''' I kinda thought it would all come together in some sort of sappy Jesus-loving ending, but it turns out it just didn't come together at all.

->They're splicing in old soundtracks and clips in such a way to make new footage. This is the bottoming out of the series. All the budgets are GONE, and we're left with this attempt at an ending. In short, it's becoming another [[ClipShow clip episode]]...It's rumored that the writer/director, Creator/HideakiAnno, got death threats over this ending. I can see why.
-->--'''[[http://spoonyexperiment.com/neon-genesis-evangelion/ Christopher Kinsey]]''' on ''Anime/NeonGenesisEvangelion''

->To imply that this is anything worthy of being called an "Endgame" is like implying a grand game of Chess exists between a stoner who wants a Cinnabon, and the mall cop who shoo'ed him away for peeing in the trash bin next to Sbarro's.
-->--'''{{Website/SFDebris}}''' on ''Series/StarTrekVoyager'', "Endgame"

->It's time to check in with Jonas, AKA [[TheMole Weaselly Traitor Dude]], as he gets in touch with his Kazon co-conspirators. I wouldn't worry too much about this scene... Oh, and in the off chance you do bother watching every episode in this scintillating plot arc, don't expect anything like a satisfying conclusion. Actually, that applies to just about any episode of this show. If you're watching ''Voyager'' expecting a satisfying conclusion to anything, you're going to be one emotionally desolate person by the time it's all over. Absolutely nothing was concluded satisfactorily on ''Voyager'', including the whole damn series itself. But "Endgame" is a bitchfest for another time.
-->--'''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''' on ''Star Trek: Voyager'', "Threshold"

->The Master has finally defeated the Doctor…by plugging in a few wires ''[[PokeThePoodle hehehehehe]]''. That would have been a crap defeat.
-->--'''[[http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.com/2011/09/season-nineteen.html Joe Ford]]''' on ''Series/DoctorWho'', [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS19E7TimeFlight}} "Time-Flight"]]

->The steady decline of the show was served well by the ending but only in the poetic justice sort of way that [[SeasonalRot karma caught up with it.]]
-->--'''[[http://www.dvdtalk.com/reviews/24310/andromeda-season-5-collection/ Don Houston]]''' on ''Series/{{Andromeda}}''

-->--Chris Sims and David Uzumeri [[http://comicsalliance.com/recap-smallville-episode-8-22-doomsday/ on]] ''{{Series/Smallville}}'' ("Doomsday")

-->--'''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''', in reaction to the easy defeat of a cool-looking white-faced ninja in ''3 Ninjas''.

->Nothing keeps a story alive more than an ending no one likes. When a big story ends with a thud, people will always wonder [[TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodPlot how it could have been done better.]] What happened with this Clone Saga is a prime example of how not to do a story, or a ''Spider-Man'' story.

->There’s a rogue Russian General. There’s a weird-accented smuggling dude. There’s his silent Indian henchman. There’s yo-yo buzzsaw man. There’s the creepy knife-throwing twins. And, you know what? Not one of them has a memorable death sequence. The film just meanders from one death to the next. It’s like ''[[Film/TheLordOfTheRings Lord of the Rings: Return of the King]]'' if you substituted “pointless villain deaths” for “fake endings...And who can forget the ending? [[CausticCritic Me, that’s who.]]

->The steady decline of the show was served well by the ending but only in the poetic justice sort of way that [[SeasonalRot karma caught up with it.]]
-->--'''[[http://www.dvdtalk.com/reviews/24310/andromeda-season-5-collection/ Don Houston]]''' on ''Series/{{Andromeda}}''

-->--'''[[http://docohobigfinish.blogspot.com/2011/09/season-nineteen.html Doc Oho]]''' on ''Series/DoctorWho'', [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS19E7TimeFlight}} "Time-Flight"]]

->There’s a rogue Russian General. There’s a weird-accented smuggling dude. There’s his silent Indian henchman. There’s yo-yo buzzsaw man. There’s the creepy knife-throwing twins. And, you know what? Not one of them has a memorable death sequence. The film just meanders from one death to the next. It’s like ''[[Film/TheLordOfTheRings Lord of the Rings: Return of the King]]'' if you substituted “pointless villain deaths” for “fake endings...And who can forget the ending? Me, that’s who.

->''"The steady decline of the show was served well by the ending but only in the poetic justice sort of way that [[SeasonalRot karma caught up with it.]]"''

->''"Whoever responsible was clearly taking a page out of [[Creator/CharlieSheen Charlie 'I’ve already got your money, dude' Sheen’s]] playbook, except at least the unhinged actor didn’t beg his disgruntled audience to see his next one-man show that he promised would totally be worth it, honest!"''

-->--'''Brett Gallman''' [[http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=24698&reviewer=429 on]] ''Film/FantasticFour2015'

->'There can be only one' was just a saying without meaning. The Source could only be accessed by [[CareBearStare the pure of heart]], and its only reward was to give the 'winner' [[BabiesEverAfter a fucking baby]]. All the suffering, the angst, the lost loves of the series meant nothing. Connor [=MacLeod=] fought the Kurgan for ''nothing'', because the Kurgan could never have entered the Source because he wasn’t pure of heart. Duncan and Methos teaming up to stop the Four Horsemen meant ''nothing'', because the world [[TheWorldIsAlwaysDoomed still fell into chaos]] and Kronos could never have accessed the Source. Darius dying meant ''nothing'' because the thing James Horton feared – that immortals would one day rule mankind – could never have come to pass because the Source offered no power and no wisdom; it offered nothing beyond the chance to have a fucking baby...Believe it or not, this movie was not made by people who wanted to permanently kill the ''Highlander'' franchise. This was supposed to be a trilogy, theoretically kicking off a new generation of immortals [[YoungerAndHipper led by Duncan’s kid]]. If there is anything to be thankful about this movie, it’s that it was so bad that it [[FranchiseKiller finally killed the franchise once and for all.]]
-->--'''''[[http://www.screamsheet.wordpress.com/2011/01/27/highlander-the-source-part-one/ The Screamsheet]]''''' on ''{{Franchise/Highlander}}: The Source''

-->--'''[[http://spoonyexperiment.com/neon-genesis-evangelion/ Christopher Kinsey]]''' on ''NeonGenesisEvangelion''

->To resurrect an old saying, '[[{{Tagline}} Anything can happen in WWE!]]' Say what you will, but {{Wrestling/Sheamus}}’s [[SquashMatch 18-second victory]] was a Wrestlemania moment to be remembered forever…except by those who were out taking a leak or who got home late and flipped on the TV at 8:05 Eastern Time.
-->--'''''{{Website/Wrestlecrap}}''''', [[http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/18-seconds/ "Sheamus Vs. Daniel Bryan - How long should this world title last? LOL, I'll pretend you said 18 seconds"]]

-->-- '''WebVideo/{{Retsupurae}}''' on ''[[TheTrappedTrilogy Escape]]''