Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Deleted line(s) 126 (click to see context) :
* InMemoriam: Hiaasen dedicated the novel to his younger brother Rob who was killed in the mass shooting at the offices of the Maryland newspaper ''The Capital'' in 2018.
Deleted line(s) 272 (click to see context) :
* WriteWhatYouKnow: Hiaasen interviewed several animal wranglers as research for his young adult novel, ''Chomp''.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 194 (click to see context) from:
* NotInMmyContract: PlayedWith in the updated epilogue: Mockingbird confides to her Secret Service boyfriend that her relationship with her husband is governed by a "companionship contract" (which most emphatically does ''not'' include sex), and said contract does not expire for another three years, which is why she can't even consider divorcing him before then. But when she sees her husband on a balcony in an unbelted bathrobe, she decides she needs a big raise to endure three more years of marriage, even SexlessMarriage, to him.
to:
* NotInMmyContract: NotInMyContract: PlayedWith in the updated epilogue: Mockingbird confides to her Secret Service boyfriend that her relationship with her husband is governed by a "companionship contract" (which most emphatically does ''not'' include sex), and said contract does not expire for another three years, which is why she can't even consider divorcing him before then. But when she sees her husband on a balcony in an unbelted bathrobe, she decides she needs a big raise to endure three more years of marriage, even SexlessMarriage, to him.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 28 (click to see context) from:
* ArtisticLicenseHistory: Angie asks offhandedly who the "stars" are at the "Stars For SARS" charity ball. Tripp Teabull lists "Dr. Oz, Creator/AnnCoulter, and a former Mrs. Creator/RonPerlman." The article "a" implies that Perlman has more than one ex-wife, when in fact at the time of the novel's publication (2020), he had just divorced his wife of 19 years, Opal Stone. He remarried in 2022, but as of the date of this note, there is still only one "former Mrs. Ron Perlman", so the article "the" would have been more accurate.
to:
* ArtisticLicenseHistory: Angie asks offhandedly who the "stars" are at the "Stars For SARS" charity ball. Tripp Teabull lists "Dr. Oz, Creator/AnnCoulter, Ann Coulter, and a former Mrs. Creator/RonPerlman." The article "a" implies that Perlman has more than one ex-wife, when in fact at the time of the novel's publication (2020), he had just divorced his wife of 19 years, Opal Stone. He remarried in 2022, but as of the date of this note, there is still only one "former Mrs. Ron Perlman", so the article "the" would have been more accurate.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 28 (click to see context) from:
* Artistic LicenseHistory: Angie asks offhandedly who the "stars" are at the "Stars For SARS" charity ball. Tripp Teabull lists "Dr. Oz, Creator/AnnCoulter, and a former Mrs. Creator/RonPerlman." The article "a" implies that Perlman has more than one ex-wife, when in fact at the time of the novel's publication (2020), he had just divorced his wife of 19 years, Opal Stone. He remarried in 2022, but as of the date of this note, there is still only one "former Mrs. Ron Perlman", so the article "the" would have been more accurate.
to:
* Artistic LicenseHistory: ArtisticLicenseHistory: Angie asks offhandedly who the "stars" are at the "Stars For SARS" charity ball. Tripp Teabull lists "Dr. Oz, Creator/AnnCoulter, and a former Mrs. Creator/RonPerlman." The article "a" implies that Perlman has more than one ex-wife, when in fact at the time of the novel's publication (2020), he had just divorced his wife of 19 years, Opal Stone. He remarried in 2022, but as of the date of this note, there is still only one "former Mrs. Ron Perlman", so the article "the" would have been more accurate.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
*AndImTheQueenOfSheba: Angie gets a late-night call to catch mice at a newly-opened country club; her stepson urges her to take the job, since "Miami's already down by nineteen" in the basketball game they are watching.
-->'''Angie''': Maybe they'll make a run.\\
'''Joel''': Sure, and maybe Creator/JenniferLawrence will show up topless at my front door.
-->'''Angie''': Maybe they'll make a run.\\
'''Joel''': Sure, and maybe Creator/JenniferLawrence will show up topless at my front door.
* Artistic LicenseHistory: Angie asks offhandedly who the "stars" are at the "Stars For SARS" charity ball. Tripp Teabull lists "Dr. Oz, Creator/AnnCoulter, and a former Mrs. Creator/RonPerlman." The article "a" implies that Perlman has more than one ex-wife, when in fact at the time of the novel's publication (2020), he had just divorced his wife of 19 years, Opal Stone. He remarried in 2022, but as of the date of this note, there is still only one "former Mrs. Ron Perlman", so the article "the" would have been more accurate.
* AwfulWeddedLife: Mastodon and Mockingbird. She copes by spending as little time in his company as possible; he seems to cope by not noticing how little time she spends in his company.
Changed line(s) 48 (click to see context) from:
* BreakTheHaughty: (in the updated epilogue) After Mastodon unsuccessfully hits on Angie, he hurriedly asked her if she signed a non-disclosure agreement, as all employees of the club must do. Angie laughs and replies, ''"what would I disclose, and who besides your loving wife would give a shit?"''
to:
** As soon as Mastodon's term ended, Casa Bellicosa's private helipad was demolished in compliance with Palm Beach County codes; Mockingbird considers it ''"spiteful and humiliating"'' that the code enforcers carried out the demolition in broad daylight, instead of waiting until after hours;
** Both Mastodon and Mockingbird's Secret Service details have been reduced, and replaced with second-tier agents, whose demeanors clearly broadcast that they'd have preferred being ReassignedToAntarctica;
** Mockingbird's semi-secret lover, Agent Ahmet/Keith has been reassigned to Maryland and ordered to avoid all contact with her ([[spoiler:an order he has no trouble obeying, after Mockingbird tried to explain that, while she loved Ahmet, staying married to Mastodon for the foreseeable future was in her best interests, financially]]);
** The club is practically deserted even at the height of the winter season; when Mockingbird testily orders the groundskeeper to ''"clear the guests from the pool"'' so she can go for a swim, the groundskeeper's silently thinks, ''"what guests?"'';
** What few guests are left, including the ever-loyal Potussies, have to raise their voices or pause their conversations altogether while jets from Palm Beach Airport fly noisily overhead, since the ex-President's residence is no longer a no-fly zone;
** KFC, Dr. Pepper and Cheese Whiz have no more loyal booster than Mastodon, yet, inexplicably, none of them is interested in paying him exorbitant amounts to appear in commercials for them; the best he can do is an ad for air-conditioned golf carts ''"that would appear primarily in South Korea"'';
** [[CuttingCorners Having laid off a third of the club's housekeeping staff, Mastodon has had them replaced with robotic vacuum cleaners]]. This creates problems with some of the club's more elderly members and guests, one of whom is suing the club after tripping and breaking his collarbone;
** The Potussies have reveled in their "outlaw" role as Mastodon's loudest, most fervent supporters, but what stings them and leads them to reconsider their loyalties is being blacklisted from Palm Beach charity events after the Capitol riots;
** After Mastodon unsuccessfully hits on Angie, he hurriedly
Changed line(s) 50 (click to see context) from:
* CassandraTruth: Ryscamp gently advises Agent Ahmet/Keith that, no matter how genuine Mockingbird's affection for him is, it'll never be enough to persuade her to divorce Mastodon. Ahmet confidently replies, ''"just wait"'', and Ryscamp gives up. [[spoiler:In the updated epilogue, Mockingbird explains to Ahmet that she can't afford to risk the millions of dollars she is earning as Mastodon's wife, at least not for the next three years that their "companionship contract" is in effect. He takes it about as well as you'd expect.]]
to:
* CassandraTruth: Ryscamp gently advises Agent Ahmet/Keith that, no matter how genuine Mockingbird's affection for him is, it'll she'll never be enough to persuade her to divorce Mastodon.Mastodon to be with him. Ahmet confidently replies, ''"just wait"'', and Ryscamp gives up. [[spoiler:In the updated epilogue, Mockingbird explains to Ahmet that she can't afford to risk the millions of dollars she is earning as Mastodon's wife, at least not for the next three years that their "companionship contract" is in effect. He takes it about as well as you'd expect.]]
* CleanupCrew: Tripp Teabull, the manager of the Lipid House Estate:
-->''In almost a decade as the caretaker-manager of Lipid House, Teabull had smoothed over—and covered up—many difficult situations arising from the bad behavior of club members or their guests. There had been thefts, fistfights, unsought nudity, indiscreet sex, drug overdoses, rowdy vandalism, and one felony stabbing... Thanks to his friendly relations with first-responders, even the indisputably deceased victims of heart attacks on the property were rushed to a nearby emergency room for a convincing charade of resuscitative efforts before the official pronunciation of death—purposely delayed by hours—was issued. The hospital, not Lipid House, would be listed as the location of demise.''
-->''In almost a decade as the caretaker-manager of Lipid House, Teabull had smoothed over—and covered up—many difficult situations arising from the bad behavior of club members or their guests. There had been thefts, fistfights, unsought nudity, indiscreet sex, drug overdoses, rowdy vandalism, and one felony stabbing... Thanks to his friendly relations with first-responders, even the indisputably deceased victims of heart attacks on the property were rushed to a nearby emergency room for a convincing charade of resuscitative efforts before the official pronunciation of death—purposely delayed by hours—was issued. The hospital, not Lipid House, would be listed as the location of demise.''
* ElitesAreMoreGlamorous: InUniverse. If Fay Alex Riptoad and the other "Potussies" (who are collectively worth more than half a billion dollars) honestly believed they were being targeted by terrorist extremists, they could easily afford to hire their own bodyguards, but Fay Alex insists on [[ScrewTheRulesIHaveConnections pulling strings]], including blackmailing the First Lady, when the Secret Service tries to revoke their protection details, simply because the prestige of being shadowed by federal lawmen (especially [[DirtyOldWoman young, handsome lawmen]]) is too good to give up.
* EnemiesEqualsGreatness: The POTUS Pussies are more thrilled than afraid at the notion that their group has been targeted by a group of ''"ideological terrorists"''; they take it as validation that Mastodon is a ''"great American hero"'' and their ostentatious support of him has drawn the notice of dangerous, important forces.
* FatBastard: Mockingbird, regarding her husband, ''"found it hard to believe this was the same man she'd married. He looked like a different person now, as if someone had put a fire hose up his ass and inflated him with meringue. His ego seemed to have swollen proportionately."''
* FatSlob: The Potussies insist to each other and anyone who will listen that Mastodon is not only a ''"great American hero"'' but also ''"enormously attractive."'' But in the updated epilogue they catch sight of him on a balcony in an unbelted bathrobe, flailing and cursing at seagulls who have mistaken his hairpiece for a thatch of straw, and turn away as quickly as possible.
-->''Distance and backlighting spared the women the full details of his frontal topography... [but] it was impossible not to notice the seismic sway of loose flesh beneath his robe.''
* FatSlob: The Potussies insist to each other and anyone who will listen that Mastodon is not only a ''"great American hero"'' but also ''"enormously attractive."'' But in the updated epilogue they catch sight of him on a balcony in an unbelted bathrobe, flailing and cursing at seagulls who have mistaken his hairpiece for a thatch of straw, and turn away as quickly as possible.
-->''Distance and backlighting spared the women the full details of his frontal topography... [but] it was impossible not to notice the seismic sway of loose flesh beneath his robe.''
* GlobalIgnorance: Mastodon, the Potussies, and even one Secret Service Agent, confuse Diego Beltran's home country, Honduras, with Guatemala and El Salvador. Subverted in that it's not that they can't tell the difference as much as they just don't care to - as far as they're concerned, the countries "down there" are all the same.
* HappyMarriageCharade: {{Subverted}}. Mastodon and Mockingbird go through the motions in public, but no one observing them together is fooled for a second. Even the Potussies, Mastodon's most fervent and delusional admirers, can tell that their beloved President is not getting the ''"female intimacy"'' he so richly deserves from his wife.
*HigherUnderstandingThroughDrugs: Skink cheerfully admits to Jim Tile that he copes with the daily stress of living in Mastodon's United States with microdoses of LSD every other day; he points out medical texts among his extensive library and says it's legitimate treatment for fatigue and depression.
* IgnoranceIsBliss: Skink ruefully tells both Jim Tile and Angie that he misses the days before he got his own WiFi hotspot, when ''"I couldn't tell you what day, month or year it was."''
* ImproperlyParanoid: The Potussies, having been fed a steady diet of ConspiracyTheories and racist fear-mongering by Mastodon and the right-wing media, immediately leap to the conclusion that their friend Kiki Pew was ''"murdered by terrorist immigrants."''
* ImproperlyParanoid: The Potussies, having been fed a steady diet of ConspiracyTheories and racist fear-mongering by Mastodon and the right-wing media, immediately leap to the conclusion that their friend Kiki Pew was ''"murdered by terrorist immigrants."''
Changed line(s) 106,113 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Fay Alex''': How do you know the DBC-88 didn't murder that poor man and make it look like an accident?
--->'''Aide''': What's the DBC-88?
--->'''Fay Alex''': It's the Diego Border Cartel.
--->'''Aide''': Yes, of course. And remind me what the 88 stands for?
--->'''Fay Alex''': How the hell should I know? It's probably gang code.
--->'''Aide''': But why would they target an unemployed transmission mechanic?
--->'''Fay Alex''': For his political loyalties! Same reason they killed Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=]: for standing loudly and proudly with POTUS.
--->'''Aide''': According to our information, Mr. Huppler had no involvement in politics. In fact, he'd never registered to vote.
--->'''Aide''': What's the DBC-88?
--->'''Fay Alex''': It's the Diego Border Cartel.
--->'''Aide''': Yes, of course. And remind me what the 88 stands for?
--->'''Fay Alex''': How the hell should I know? It's probably gang code.
--->'''Aide''': But why would they target an unemployed transmission mechanic?
--->'''Fay Alex''': For his political loyalties! Same reason they killed Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=]: for standing loudly and proudly with POTUS.
--->'''Aide''': According to our information, Mr. Huppler had no involvement in politics. In fact, he'd never registered to vote.
to:
--->'''Aide''':
'''Aide''': What's the
--->'''Fay
'''Fay Alex''': It's the Diego Border
--->'''Aide''':
'''Aide''': Yes, of course. And remind me what the 88 stands
--->'''Fay
'''Fay Alex''': How the hell should I know? It's probably gang
--->'''Aide''':
'''Aide''': But why would they target an unemployed transmission
--->'''Fay
'''Fay Alex''': For his political loyalties! Same reason they killed Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=]: for standing loudly and proudly with
--->'''Aide''':
'''Aide''': According to our information, Mr. Huppler had no involvement in politics. In fact, he'd never registered to
* InsistentTerminology:
** "Technically, SARS is not a disease, it's an illness."
** "Not a party, not a party! A ''charity ball''."
** "The Knob" insists on calling the wig he wears while testing the Presidential tanning bed a "piece", because "wigs are for chicks."
* LetMeGetThisStraight: ''"Okay, Angie, just to be clear... you're telling me the crazy old fuck fed LSD to a 24-foot killer python?"''
Changed line(s) 132 (click to see context) from:
* {{Malaproper}}: Mastodon, to the Nth degree.
to:
* MajoredInWesternHypocrisy: Diego Beltran came to the United States from Honduras on a student visa and earned a Bachelor's Degree in Latin American Studies from the University of Miami. He re-enters the country illegally after his two favorite uncles are shot by police at a political demonstration, but being falsely accused of killing Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=] lands him in jail and branded a "terrorist" by the President and the right-wing media. While behind bars, he fully acknowledges the irony that, although he is experiencing the very worst side of American culture, he still prefers to be a citizen of the United States than to stay in his native country.
* {{Malaproper}}: Mastodon,to the Nth degree.UpToEleven.
* {{Malaproper}}: Mastodon,
Changed line(s) 155 (click to see context) from:
** When one agent asks if there is any actual evidence that ''"terrorist immigrants"'' murdered Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=], or that Diego Beltran has a connection to any such group, Ryscamp's terse response is that Mastodon ''"[[AssPull just pulled it out of his ass, like everything else]]."''
to:
** When one agent asks if there is any actual evidence that ''"terrorist immigrants"'' murdered Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=], or that Diego Beltran has a connection to any such group, Ryscamp's terse response is that Mastodon ''"[[AssPull just ''"just pulled it out of his ass, like everything else]]."''
* NotHelpingYourCase: Mockingbird has her bodyguard/lover, Keith/Ahmet engage in some harmless flirting with another female agent, just to quash the rumors about their affair, but is enraged when they appear to be developing genuine affection for each other. She demands to know why he didn’t tell her he promised to build the female agent a maple armoire (woodworking being his hobby). His lame response is, ''"it's not an armoire, it's a writing desk... and all I told her was pine, not maple. Ordinary Georgia pine."''
* NotInMmyContract: PlayedWith in the updated epilogue: Mockingbird confides to her Secret Service boyfriend that her relationship with her husband is governed by a "companionship contract" (which most emphatically does ''not'' include sex), and said contract does not expire for another three years, which is why she can't even consider divorcing him before then. But when she sees her husband on a balcony in an unbelted bathrobe, she decides she needs a big raise to endure three more years of marriage, even SexlessMarriage, to him.
* NotInMmyContract: PlayedWith in the updated epilogue: Mockingbird confides to her Secret Service boyfriend that her relationship with her husband is governed by a "companionship contract" (which most emphatically does ''not'' include sex), and said contract does not expire for another three years, which is why she can't even consider divorcing him before then. But when she sees her husband on a balcony in an unbelted bathrobe, she decides she needs a big raise to endure three more years of marriage, even SexlessMarriage, to him.
Changed line(s) 171 (click to see context) from:
* OneHourWorkWeek: The Knob's job consists of lying on his back inside the President's tanning bed for 13 minutes each day; unfortunately he's such a slacker that he can't even manage that; after [[AlcoholInducedIdiocy passing out drunk]] on the beach, he awakens at noon, sunburned from head to foot and unable to absorb artificial UV rays.
to:
* OneHourWorkWeek: OneHourWorkWeek:
** Mastodon's duties as President include several rounds of golf, press conferences, fundraising balls, and dinners with Saudi royalty and Russian oligarchs, but no meetings with anyone remotely official. TheKnob's closest thing to official work he is ever reported doing is a morning briefing in the Oval Office about ''"the latest subpoenas"'' and fodder for his Twitter rants, including Diego Beltran's arrest on suspicion of killing Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=].
** "The Knob"'s job consists of lying on his back inside the President's tanning bed for 13 minutes each day; unfortunately he's such a slacker that he can't even manage that; after [[AlcoholInducedIdiocy passing out drunk]] on the beach, he awakens at noon, sunburned from head to foot and unable to absorb artificial UV rays.
** Mastodon's duties as President include several rounds of golf, press conferences, fundraising balls, and dinners with Saudi royalty and Russian oligarchs, but no meetings with anyone remotely official. The
** "The Knob"'s job consists of lying on his back inside the President's tanning bed for 13 minutes each day; unfortunately he's such a slacker that he can't even manage that; after [[AlcoholInducedIdiocy passing out drunk]] on the beach, he awakens at noon, sunburned from head to foot and unable to absorb artificial UV rays.
Added DiffLines:
* OpenSecret: It's fairly common knowledge among the staff at Casa Bellicosa and the Secret Service that the First Lady is sleeping with one of her bodyguards. The only reason Mastodon hasn't caught on is, in Mockingbird's words, ''"nobody around him would have the guts to tell him... [e]ven if they did, he's too damn vain to believe it."''
* OriginalPositionFallacy: Fay Alex Riptoad and the POTUS Pussies once lovingly embraced, parroted, and amplified all of Mastodon's ConspiracyTheories about ''"immigrant hordes"'', and the ''"deep state traitors'"'' futile attempts to undermine his Presidency, and donated almost $500,000 to fund his post-election lawsuits, but (in the updated epilogue) they resent being blacklisted from the Palm Beach social circuit after January 6, 2021, as if they have '''anything''' in common with ''"the knuckle-dragging fascist contingent of Mastodon's fanbase"'' who stormed the Capitol building.
* OriginalPositionFallacy: Fay Alex Riptoad and the POTUS Pussies once lovingly embraced, parroted, and amplified all of Mastodon's ConspiracyTheories about ''"immigrant hordes"'', and the ''"deep state traitors'"'' futile attempts to undermine his Presidency, and donated almost $500,000 to fund his post-election lawsuits, but (in the updated epilogue) they resent being blacklisted from the Palm Beach social circuit after January 6, 2021, as if they have '''anything''' in common with ''"the knuckle-dragging fascist contingent of Mastodon's fanbase"'' who stormed the Capitol building.
Added DiffLines:
** Mockingbird might hate being First Lady, but she is secretly shocked and outraged to hear that the Potussies were assigned Secret Service protection, as if these RichBitch grandmothers have as much right to government protection as she does. Likewise, she suggests that her secret lover Ahmet engage in some "harmless flirting" with an attractive female agent on the First Lady's detail to discourage gossip, but is outraged when they appear to be getting genuinely close to each other - she clearly didn't consider the possibility that this younger, more professional, and (maybe) just-as-attractive woman could ever replace Mockingbird in Ahmet's affections.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Deleted line(s) 216 (click to see context) :
* SurprisinglyGoodEnglish: Diego Beltran, a Honduran exchange student who earned a B.A. from the University of Miami, and Christian, the Danish maintenance technician for the President's personal tanning beds, both speak flawless English. When Diego is arrested by ICE, the arresting officer needs to check three times to confirm that he is not a native-born American citizen;
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Up To Eleven is a defunct trope
Changed line(s) 185 (click to see context) from:
* RichBitch: The Potussies, UpToEleven. In the words of the reviewer for ''The New Republic'': ''"By setting ''Squeeze Me'' in Palm Beach, Hiaasen focuses squarely on the president's wealthiest supporters - the true heart of his base... These people support [the President] because they have nothing but disdain for everyone beneath them - it's a way of acting out fantasies of punishing the poor and the non-white."''
to:
* RichBitch: The Potussies, UpToEleven.Potussies. In the words of the reviewer for ''The New Republic'': ''"By setting ''Squeeze Me'' in Palm Beach, Hiaasen focuses squarely on the president's wealthiest supporters - the true heart of his base... These people support [the President] because they have nothing but disdain for everyone beneath them - it's a way of acting out fantasies of punishing the poor and the non-white."''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 147 (click to see context) from:
* NeverMyFault: After emerging from the toilet "''red-faced from exertion''", Mastodon yells at his valet for not fetching a larger dose of laxatives. Mockingbird acidly suggests that her husband cut back his intake of red meat to something "''like, two pounds a day[.]''"
to:
* NeverMyFault: After emerging from the toilet "''red-faced from exertion''", Mastodon yells at his valet for not fetching a larger dose of laxatives. Mockingbird acidly suggests that asks her husband cut whether he's considered cutting back his intake of red meat to something "''like, two pounds a day[.]''"day?''"
Changed line(s) 159 (click to see context) from:
* NoPartyGiven: PlayedWith. While Angie doesn't hide her contempt for the current President, in her cynical opinion: -->''It didn't seem to matter who was in power. Nothing got better in the besieged, breathtaking world she cared about most... the sitting President of the United States was a soulless imbecile who hated the outdoors, but in Angie's view, at this point Teddy Roosevelt himself couldn't turn the tide if he came back from the dead.''
to:
* NoPartyGiven: PlayedWith. While Angie doesn't hide her contempt for the current President, in her cynical opinion: opinion:
-->''It didn't seem to matter who was in power. Nothing got better in the besieged, breathtaking world she cared about most... the sitting President of the United States was a soulless imbecile who hated the outdoors, but in Angie's view, at this point Teddy Roosevelt himself couldn't turn the tide if he came back from the dead.''
-->''It didn't seem to matter who was in power. Nothing got better in the besieged, breathtaking world she cared about most... the sitting President of the United States was a soulless imbecile who hated the outdoors, but in Angie's view, at this point Teddy Roosevelt himself couldn't turn the tide if he came back from the dead.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* NoPartyGiven: PlayedWith. While Angie doesn't hide her contempt for the current President, in her cynical opinion: -->''It didn't seem to matter who was in power. Nothing got better in the besieged, breathtaking world she cared about most... the sitting President of the United States was a soulless imbecile who hated the outdoors, but in Angie's view, at this point Teddy Roosevelt himself couldn't turn the tide if he came back from the dead.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 12 (click to see context) from:
** ''Mastodon was still fumbling to belt his pants, groping for the buckle over the rolling sea of his gut.''
to:
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* BreakTheHaughty: (in the updated epilogue) After Mastodon unsuccessfully hits on Angie, he hurriedly asked her if she signed a non-disclosure agreement, as all employees of the club must do. Angie laughs and replies, ''"what would I disclose, and who besides your loving wife would give a shit?"''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* AdiposeRex: Mockingbird, a retired fashion model, eats healthy and works out regularly. Mastodon eats four bags of Egg [=McMuffins=] every morning and limits his physical activity to golf. The results show.
** ''Mastodon was still fumbling to belt his pants, groping for the buckle over the rolling sea of his gut.''
** ''Mastodon was still fumbling to belt his pants, groping for the buckle over the rolling sea of his gut.''
Added DiffLines:
* NeverMyFault: After emerging from the toilet "''red-faced from exertion''", Mastodon yells at his valet for not fetching a larger dose of laxatives. Mockingbird acidly suggests that her husband cut back his intake of red meat to something "''like, two pounds a day[.]''"
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 151 (click to see context) from:
** When one agent asks if there is any actual evidence that ''"terrorist immigrants"'' murdered Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=], or that Diego Beltran has a connection to any such group, Ryscamp's terse response is that Mastodon ''"just pulled it out of his ass, like everything else."''
to:
** When one agent asks if there is any actual evidence that ''"terrorist immigrants"'' murdered Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=], or that Diego Beltran has a connection to any such group, Ryscamp's terse response is that Mastodon ''"just ''"[[AssPull just pulled it out of his ass, like everything else.else]]."''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* PanderingToTheBase: InUniverse. The President of the United States never engages in official duties of any kind, but he never misses a chance to play to his most rabid fans, which is why he becomes ''"almost giddy"'' at the chance to [[TheScapegoat re-cast]] Diego Beltran as not just a murderer, but the leader of a ''"terrorist gang"'' targeting the President's richest and most loyal supporters; during the Commander's Ball, he takes a break from his mingling duties to duck into the bathroom and gleefully appraise the Twitter reaction to his latest incendiary speech.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
** Said mistress is already shopping a racy book deal to New York publishers, including such salacious lines as ''"scathingly compar[ing] the executive gonads to 'dessicated chickpeas.'"''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Deleted line(s) 54 (click to see context) :
* CoolWig: Averted. The Knob, the "test dummy" for Mastodon's tanning bed, has to wear a wig made from the President's actual hair as part of the testing procedure; he insists on calling it a "piece", because ''"wigs are for chicks."''
Added DiffLines:
** The Knob insists on calling it a "piece", because ''"wigs are for chicks."''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* CoolWig: Averted. The Knob, the "test dummy" for Mastodon's tanning bed, has to wear a wig made from the President's actual hair as part of the testing procedure; he insists on calling it a "piece", because ''"wigs are for chicks."''
Added DiffLines:
* OneHourWorkWeek: The Knob's job consists of lying on his back inside the President's tanning bed for 13 minutes each day; unfortunately he's such a slacker that he can't even manage that; after [[AlcoholInducedIdiocy passing out drunk]] on the beach, he awakens at noon, sunburned from head to foot and unable to absorb artificial UV rays.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 47 (click to see context) from:
* CassandraTruth: Ryscamp gently advises Agent Ahmet/Keith that, no matter how genuine Mockingbird's affection for him is, it'll never be enough to persuade her to divorce Mastodon. Ahmet confidently replies, ''"just wait"'', and Ryscamp gives up. [[spoiler:In the updated epilogue, Mockingbird explains to him that she can't afford to risk the millions of dollars she is earning as Mastodon's wife, at least not for the next three years that their "companionship contract" is in effect. Ahmet takes it about as well as you'd expect.]]
to:
* CassandraTruth: Ryscamp gently advises Agent Ahmet/Keith that, no matter how genuine Mockingbird's affection for him is, it'll never be enough to persuade her to divorce Mastodon. Ahmet confidently replies, ''"just wait"'', and Ryscamp gives up. [[spoiler:In the updated epilogue, Mockingbird explains to him Ahmet that she can't afford to risk the millions of dollars she is earning as Mastodon's wife, at least not for the next three years that their "companionship contract" is in effect. Ahmet He takes it about as well as you'd expect.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 141 (click to see context) from:
** Lampshaded in the ending, when [[spoiler:Skink reveals that the python that killed and devoured Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=] was not "one of his", but instead ''"motored up north all by herself."''
to:
** Lampshaded in the ending, when [[spoiler:Skink reveals that the python that killed and devoured Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=] was not "one of his", but instead ''"motored up north there all by herself."''"'']]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* CassandraTruth: Ryscamp gently advises Agent Ahmet/Keith that, no matter how genuine Mockingbird's affection for him is, it'll never be enough to persuade her to divorce Mastodon. Ahmet confidently replies, ''"just wait"'', and Ryscamp gives up. [[spoiler:In the updated epilogue, Mockingbird explains to him that she can't afford to risk the millions of dollars she is earning as Mastodon's wife, at least not for the next three years that their "companionship contract" is in effect. Ahmet takes it about as well as you'd expect.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* InMemoriam: Hiaasen dedicated the novel to his younger brother Rob who was killed in the mass shooting at the offices of the Maryland newspaper ''The Capital'' in 2018.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
* SmallNameBigEgo: take your pick.
** Mastodon, naturally: He threatens his wife, ''"I am ''the'' President of ''the'' United Goddamn States of America!"'' just before she [[ArmorPiercingResponse threatens to do a one-on-one interview for TMZ]] and expose every single skeleton he has buried in his closet, leaving him speechless.
** The Potussies are having the time of their lives after Kiki Pew's death, becoming the media darlings of the President's latest social media "crusade", and believing that it elevates them to the status of White House advisors. They refuse to admit that Mastodon can't even remember their names, or Kiki Pew's (which he keeps mispronouncing).
** Mastodon, naturally: He threatens his wife, ''"I am ''the'' President of ''the'' United Goddamn States of America!"'' just before she [[ArmorPiercingResponse threatens to do a one-on-one interview for TMZ]] and expose every single skeleton he has buried in his closet, leaving him speechless.
** The Potussies are having the time of their lives after Kiki Pew's death, becoming the media darlings of the President's latest social media "crusade", and believing that it elevates them to the status of White House advisors. They refuse to admit that Mastodon can't even remember their names, or Kiki Pew's (which he keeps mispronouncing).
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 41 (click to see context) from:
* BlatantLies: (in the updated epilogue) One of the Potussies absents herself from the group's usual gathering, after her son is arrested for ''"smearing what the FBI had determined to be beagle feces"'' over a statue in the Capitol Building during the January 6, 2021 riot. To anyone who asks, her standard response is, ''"my boy was framed by antifa!"'', but she still can't show her face in the ''"hideously small town"'' of Palm Beach, since every member of the island's population knows that her son is a ConspiracyTheory-obsessed ''"imbecile"'', who happens to own several beagles.
to:
* BlatantLies: (in BlatantLies:
** Mastodon insists that the woman staying at his expense at a nearby beachfront hotel isn't a stripper, and ''certainly'' not his mistress, she's his personal nutritionist. Mockingbird's [[DeadpanSnarker deadpan]] response: ''"And doing a fine job, I can see."''
**(in the updated epilogue) One of the Potussies absents herself from the group's usual gathering, after her son is arrested for ''"smearing what the FBI had determined to be beagle feces"'' over a statue in the Capitol Building during the January 6, 2021 riot. To anyone who asks, her standard response is, ''"my boy was framed by antifa!"'', but she still can't show her face in the ''"hideously small town"'' of Palm Beach, since every member of the island's population knows that her son is a ConspiracyTheory-obsessed ''"imbecile"'', who happens to own several beagles.
** Mastodon insists that the woman staying at his expense at a nearby beachfront hotel isn't a stripper, and ''certainly'' not his mistress, she's his personal nutritionist. Mockingbird's [[DeadpanSnarker deadpan]] response: ''"And doing a fine job, I can see."''
**(in the updated epilogue) One of the Potussies absents herself from the group's usual gathering, after her son is arrested for ''"smearing what the FBI had determined to be beagle feces"'' over a statue in the Capitol Building during the January 6, 2021 riot. To anyone who asks, her standard response is, ''"my boy was framed by antifa!"'', but she still can't show her face in the ''"hideously small town"'' of Palm Beach, since every member of the island's population knows that her son is a ConspiracyTheory-obsessed ''"imbecile"'', who happens to own several beagles.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
** Lampshaded in the ending, when [[spoiler:Skink reveals that the python that killed and devoured Kiki Pew [=FitzSimmons=] was not "one of his", but instead ''"motored up north all by herself."''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Added DiffLines:
** In a bizarre dream, Angie sees herself removing a screech owl from the President's toupee, then being awarded a ''"milk chocolate medal"'' by a man wearing ''"a Confederate colonel's uniform and a red baseball cap."''
Added DiffLines:
* DreamingTheTruth: Averted. Angie has two [[RealDreamsAreWeirder bizarre dreams]], but neither of them does anything to change her opinion that ''"dreams meant nothing - nonsense farted by a restless subconscious."'' (on Goodreads, Hiaasen said that this is how he himself feels about his dreams, and sometimes he feels the need to embellish them for the benefit of his therapist).
** In one, she is summoned to Casa Bellicosa to remove a screech owl from the President's hairpiece ''"[[DodgyToupee which it had mistaken for a roadkill fox]]"'', then forced to sign a NDA swearing that she has not seen the President without the piece on;
** In the second, she is climbing a tree while wearing an elaborate ballroom gown, in pursuit of a roaring one-eyed bear whose single good eye is a rose-colored pearl (this proves to be more prophetic);
** In one, she is summoned to Casa Bellicosa to remove a screech owl from the President's hairpiece ''"[[DodgyToupee which it had mistaken for a roadkill fox]]"'', then forced to sign a NDA swearing that she has not seen the President without the piece on;
** In the second, she is climbing a tree while wearing an elaborate ballroom gown, in pursuit of a roaring one-eyed bear whose single good eye is a rose-colored pearl (this proves to be more prophetic);
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 176 (click to see context) from:
** Played straight with Jim Tile, who after decades of service with the Florida Highway Patrol, actually knows several high-ranking members of the state government, and knows exactly which names to drop when he gate-crashes the President's fundraiser.
to:
** Played straight with Jim Tile, (in the updated epilogue) The Potussies catch sight of Mastodon on a balcony at Casa Bellicosa but, embarrassed by his disheveled appearance, decide not to wave and pretend not to have noticed him. Mastodon has already noticed the women, but doesn't have a clue who after decades of service with the Florida Highway Patrol, actually knows several high-ranking members of the state government, and knows exactly which names to drop when he gate-crashes the President's fundraiser.they are:
--->''Without their garish patriotic costumes, they looked like ordinary club members. Bridge players, maybe. There was a seniors' league on weekends.''
--->''Without their garish patriotic costumes, they looked like ordinary club members. Bridge players, maybe. There was a seniors' league on weekends.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 142 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Mockingbird''': ''[M]y husband doesn't trust anyone with an Islamic name, or Jews, or blacks, or Asians, or Hispanics, or Mormons, or whatever. God, it's exhausting to keep track. With my accent, I'm amazed he married ''me''.''//'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
to:
--->'''Mockingbird''': ''[M]y husband doesn't trust anyone with an Islamic name, or Jews, or blacks, or Asians, or Hispanics, or Mormons, or whatever. God, it's exhausting to keep track. With my accent, I'm amazed he married ''me''.''//'''Ryscamp''': ''
--->'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
--->'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 142,143 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Mockingbird''': ''[M]y husband doesn't trust anyone with an Islamic name, or Jews, or blacks, or Asians, or Hispanics, or Mormons, or whatever. God, it's exhausting to keep track. With my accent, I'm amazed he married ''me''.''//
'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
to:
--->'''Mockingbird''': ''[M]y husband doesn't trust anyone with an Islamic name, or Jews, or blacks, or Asians, or Hispanics, or Mormons, or whatever. God, it's exhausting to keep track. With my accent, I'm amazed he married ''me''.''//
'''Ryscamp''':''//'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
'''Ryscamp''':
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 142,143 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Mockingbird''': ''[M]y husband doesn't trust anyone with an Islamic name, or Jews, or blacks, or Asians, or Hispanics, or Mormons, or whatever. God, it's exhausting to keep track. With my accent, I'm amazed he married ''me''.''
-->'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
-->'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
to:
-->'''Ryscamp''':
'''Ryscamp''': [[DeadpanSnarker No, you're not.]]
