History Literature / SkippysList

--> 128. [[CannibalTheMusical "Shpadoinkle" is not a real word.]]

See also ''Blog/ThingsMrWelchIsNoLongerAllowedToDoInAnRPG'', which ''Skippy's List'' inspired, as well as "Things I Am No Longer Allowed To Do At [[Franchise/HarryPotter Hogwarts]]", which has several different iterations, most commonly numbering one hundred and fifty. Not to mention ''Blog/SurvivalTipsForSHIELDRecruits'', which is past the five hundred mark, and still counting. Another variation of this list while still keeping the military theme is ''Fanfic/ThingsXCOMOperativesAreNoLongerAllowedToDo'' which has civilians getting in on the action as well.

--> 52. Not allowed to yell [[GIJoe "Take that Cobra"]] at the rifle range.
--> 53. Not allowed to quote ''FullMetalJacket'' at the rifle range.

--> 99. [[{{Minesweeper}} A smiley face is not used to mark a minefield.]]
--> 113. There is absolutely no need to emulate the people from ''[[TheFullMonty Full Monty]]'' every time I hear the song "Hot Stuff" [[note]](131. No dancing in the turret. This especially applies in conjunction with rule #113.)[[/note]]

** This isn't just a Skippyism, it's actually a law. It's been illegal to duel people while in active military service since the days of GeorgeWashington and the Revolutionary War even. Washington likely got it from the British, who formally banned lower-ranking officers from calling out higher ranking ones (because the KlingonPromotion trope doesn't work in real life) and informally discouraged challenges from higher-ups or between officers of equal rank.

* LessDisturbingInContext: Invoked. A lot of the list isn't stuff Skippy actually did; they're just real regulations being quoted in such a way to imply [[WhoWouldBeStupidEnough someone was stupid enough to disobey them]].

* TechnologyMarchesOn / LifeImitatesArt: Chem-Light batteries now actually exist.

* TooSoon:

--> 136. Shouting [[{{Platoon}} "Let's do the village! Let's do the whole fucking village!"]] while out on a mission is bad.

--> 185. My name is not [[{{Dune}} a killing word]].

---> He made a kilt so he could be "...the world's first edible Scott."

--> 51. Not allowed to quote "DrSeuss" on military operations.

See also ''Blog/ThingsMrWelchIsNoLongerAllowedToDoInAnRPG'', which ''Skippy's List'' inspired, as well as "Things I Am No Longer Allowed To Do At [[Franchise/HarryPotter Hogwarts]]", which has several different iterations, most commonly numbering one hundred and fifty. Not to mention ''Blog/SurvivalTipsForSHIELDRecruits'', which is past the five hundred mark, and still counting.

''Skippy's List'' proves that TheLoonie can be applied to the military as well as TabletopGames. The list consists of things that Skippy--an enlisted woman in the US Army's psychological operations department[[note]]specifically drawing propaganda posters in [[TheYugoslavWars postwar Bosnia]][[/note]]--discovered were forbidden in the US Army, generally [[NoodleIncident without much context]] as to how she found out (although the blog does provide some explanations). It first came to the Internet back in 2001, lists 213 things Skippy Is No Longer Allowed To Do In The [[YanksWithTanks US Army]]. [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer As the site explains, everything on the list actually happened]], either as something [[TruthInTelevision Skippy herself did]], [[OrSoIHeard something she saw happen]], something she was [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial spontaneously informed she was not allowed to do]], a [[LoopholeAbuse clarification to one of the above]], or "[[ItMakesSenseInContext I was just minding my own business, when something happened]]."

* ActuallyPrettyFunny: She got ''commended'' for some of these, specifically:

** As one of her superiors [[http://skippyslist.com/2010/11/19/the-battalion-dance-2/ put it]]: “Specialist Schwarz is following his instructions to the letter. If the chain of command wants to re-state those instructions in some way that doesn't violate any Equal Opportunity regulations, they’re welcome to try. But you and I both know that Schwarz is way better at this sort of thing than they are.”

* OurLawyersAdvisedThisTrope: Why we can post at least part of her list.

* WholesomeCrossdresser: One story, [[http://skippyslist.com/2010/11/19/the-battalion-dance-2/ "The Battalion Dance"]], tells the story of Skippy and her fellow soldiers being forced to attend a dance that they ''really'' didn't want to (mainly because they were actually forced to work in multiple car washes to raise money for said dance, and when that didn't work out, attendance was made mandatory... but everyone had to either buy/rent a suit or a dress, ''and'' buy the damn ticket. Suffice to say, everyone hated this dance.) Skippy initially tries attending wearing a dress, but before the dance, someone rats her out and she is not allowed to wear the dress. Then she meets a transvestite... [[spoiler: and gets ratted out again, and shortly afterwards, mandatory dance attendance is cancelled. Skippy noted that her attempt to go to the dance with a drag queen may have had nothing to do with the decision, since it's kind of against the rules for the higher-ups to order their soldiers to spend money on a dance for their wives (and it's also against the rules to order them to appear in any uniform that wasn't issued to them, incidentally.).]]

''Skippy's List'' proves that TheLoonie can be applied to the military as well as TabletopGames. The list consists of things that Skippy--an enlisted man in the US Army's psychological operations department[[note]]specifically drawing propaganda posters in [[TheYugoslavWars postwar Bosnia]][[/note]]--discovered were forbidden in the US Army, generally [[NoodleIncident without much context]] as to how he found out (although the blog does provide some explanations). It first came to the Internet back in 2001, lists 213 things Skippy Is No Longer Allowed To Do In The [[YanksWithTanks US Army]]. [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer As the site explains, everything on the list actually happened]], either as something [[TruthInTelevision Skippy himself did]], [[OrSoIHeard something he saw happen]], something he was [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial spontaneously informed he was not allowed to do]], a [[LoopholeAbuse clarification to one of the above]], or "[[ItMakesSenseInContext I was just minding my own business, when something happened]]."

* ActuallyPrettyFunny: He got ''commended'' for some of these, specifically:

** As one of his superiors [[http://skippyslist.com/2010/11/19/the-battalion-dance-2/ put it]]: “Specialist Schwarz is following his instructions to the letter. If the chain of command wants to re-state those instructions in some way that doesn't violate any Equal Opportunity regulations, they’re welcome to try. But you and I both know that Schwarz is way better at this sort of thing than they are.”

* OurLawyersAdvisedThisTrope: Why we can post at least part of his list.

* WholesomeCrossdresser: One story, [[http://skippyslist.com/2010/11/19/the-battalion-dance-2/ "The Battalion Dance"]], tells the story of Skippy and his fellow soldiers being forced to attend a dance that they ''really'' didn't want to (mainly because they were actually forced to work in multiple car washes to raise money for said dance, and when that didn't work out, attendance was made mandatory... but everyone had to either buy/rent a suit or a dress, ''and'' buy the damn ticket. Suffice to say, everyone hated this dance.) Skippy initially tries attending wearing a dress, but before the dance, someone rats him out and he is not allowed to wear the dress. Then he meets a transvestite... [[spoiler: and gets ratted out again, and shortly afterwards, mandatory dance attendance is cancelled. Skippy noted that his attempt to go to the dance with a drag queen may have had nothing to do with the decision, since it's kind of against the rules for the higher-ups to order their soldiers to spend money on a dance for their wives (and it's also against the rules to order them to appear in any uniform that wasn't issued to them, incidentally.).]]

* TheLoonie: Just not in terms of roleplaying games.

** As one of his superiors put it: “Specialist Schwarz is following his instructions to the letter. If the chain of command wants to re-state those instructions in some way that doesn’t violate any Equal Opportunity regulations, they’re welcome to try. But you and I both know that Schwarz is way better at this sort of thing than they are.”

* TheLoonie

''Skippy's List'' proves that TheLoonie can be applied to the military as well as TabletopGames. The list consists of things that Skippy--an enlisted man in the US Army's psychological operations department[[note]]Read: Drawing propaganda posters in [[TheYugoslavWars postwar Bosnia]][[/note]]--discovered were forbidden in the US Army, generally [[NoodleIncident without much context]] as to how he found out (although the blog does provide some explanations). It first came to the Internet back in 2001, lists 213 things Skippy Is No Longer Allowed To Do In The [[YanksWithTanks US Army]]. [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer As the site explains, everything on the list actually happened]], either as something [[TruthInTelevision Skippy himself did]], [[OrSoIHeard something he saw happen]], something he was [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial spontaneously informed he was not allowed to do]], a [[LoopholeAbuse clarification to one of the above]], or "[[ItMakesSenseInContext I was just minding my own business, when something happened]]."

See also ''Blog/ThingsMrWelchIsNoLongerAllowedToDoInAnRPG'', which ''Skippy's List'' inspired, as well as "Things I Am No Longer Allowed To Do At [[Franchise/HarryPotter Hogwarts]]", which has several different iterations, most commonly numbering one hundred and fifty.

--> 49. Not allowed to trade military equipment for [[JackAndTheBeanstalk "magic beans"]].

* NoodleImplement:

-->54. "Napalm sticks to kids" is *not* a motivational phrase.

* DudeNotFunny: InUniverse
--> 93. Nerve gas is not funny.

--> 29. The Irish [=MPs=] are not after [[NotableCommercialCampaigns "Me frosted lucky charms"]].

--> 128. [[CannibalTheMusical "Shpadoinkle" is not a real word.]]

--> 6. Not allowed to play ''PulpFiction'' with a suction-cup dart pistol and any officer.

--> 58. The following words and phrases may not be used in a cadence- Budding sexuality, [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], I hate everyone in this formation and wish they were dead, sexual lubrication, black earth mother, [[ArmoredClosetGay all Marines are latent homosexuals]], Tantric yoga, Gotterdammerung, Korean hooker, Eskimo Nell, we've all got jackboots now, slut puppy, '''or any references to squid'''.[[labelnote:*]]Which references [[RefugeInAudacity a]] [[PieInTheFace very]] [[CrowningMomentOfFunny specific]] [[http://skippyslist.com/2007/07/09/cephalopod-surprise/ incident.]][[/labelnote]]