History Funny / TheLordOfTheRingsTheTwoTowers

** A funny moment within a funny moment: When she deflects his sword, her expression never changes, with naught but a shift in stance also changing the meaning of her expression from "Uh-oh." to "Don't tempt me, old man." Aragorn promptly stands down.

'''Aragorn''': ''*whispering*'' It's the beards. ''*Éowyn chuckles*''\\
'''Gimli''': And this in turn has given rise to the belief that there ''are'' no dwarf women! And that dwarves just spring out of holes in the ground! ''*Éowyn laughs*'' ...which is of course, ridiculous!

---> '''Gimli''': ''To a Warg'' Bring your pretty face to my axe!\\
''Legolas rides by and shoots it''\\

* Gimli's and Legolas' body-counting contest.
** The deleted scene showing the result of their bet. Legolas: 42, Gimli: 43...then Legolas shoots Gimli's last kill.
--->'''Gimli:''' He was already dead!\\
'''Legolas:''' He was twitching!\\
'''Gimli:''' He was ''twitching?'' Cause he's got my axe '''embedded in his nervous system'''! ''[punctuates by jerking the axe, inducing more twitching]''.
*** Also a meta example -- Creator/PeterJackson was fully aware of the AnachronismStew.

* "That doesn't make much sense to me. But then you ''are'' very small."
** What happens beforehand between Pippin and Treebeard doubles as both a CMOF and a CMOA. Treebeard is taking Merry and Pippin home after the Entmoot results in no response to Saruman's treachery. Then Pippin realizes that getting Treebeard to take them to Isengard will set him off and finally get him to go to war. How does he do this? Through the most laughably transparent bullshitting Middle-Earth has ever seen. The best part is that ''it actually works:''
--->'''Pippin:''' [[InsaneTrollLogic The closer we are to danger, the farther we are from harm]]. ''It's the last thing he'll expect!''
* What Éowyn told Aragorn about fearing a cage (like in the book) becomes funny on a meta level since Creator/NicolasCage had been offered the role of Aragorn, but turned it down.

* When the lead Uruk-hai, Ugluk, reminds his restless soldiers that Saruman wants Merry and Pippin ''alive'', one particularly smartass Orc, Grishnakh, asks "Wot about their legs? [[LoopholeAbuse They don't need those to live!]]"
** The mere fact that the AlwaysChaoticEvil Orcs are clearly about to either mutiny or unionize after running for three days straight and demand a break.
** An Uruk-Hai complains "We ain't had nothing to eat but maggoty bread for THREE STINKIN' DAYS!" An orc then whines "Yeah! Why can't we have some meat?!" This is the only time in the trilogy [[WeAreStrugglingTogether where the forces of Isengard and Mordor manage to agree on something]].
** When one of the Orcs pulls a knife on the Hobbits, Ugluk decapitates the disobedient Orc and barks "[[BondOneLiner Looks like meat's back on the menu, boys!]]" Cue the famished Orcs [[MonstrousCannibalism gleefully tearing the corpse to shreds in their hunger.]]
** On a meta level, many amused commenters have noted with varying degrees of seriousness that the Orcs apparently [[AnachronismStew know what a "menu" is]], which therefore logically implies the existence of [[VillainsOutShopping Orc restaurants.]]
* Encountering Treebeard, Pippin telling Merry "''Don't talk to it. Don't encourage it.''"
** The moment before when Treebeard wakes up and Pippin stares at him, then turns to look back at Merry and Grishnak...[[DelayedReaction and then he hears the tree he's in make a sound and he slowly turns to look back at Treebeard.]]
* Then there is the moment in the second movie where Aragorn kicks an orc helmet and screams loud after being led to believe Merry and Pippin were dead. A serious moment under normal circumstances, if you don't take into account that Creator/ViggoMortensen actually broke two of his toes during that shot. The scream is so realistic because he screamed out of actual ''physical'' pain rather than the emotional response of the character.
* "If we had time I'd get this adjusted. ''(chainmail crashes to the floor) '' ''{{Beat}}'' It's a bit tight across the chest!" The "''Of course'' it is" looks on Aragorn and Legolas' faces just sells it.
* As our heroes are awaiting the attack on Helm's Deep, the camera pans along the top of the wall, showing a row of soldiers... and a gap right next to Legolas with just the top of Gimli's helmet visible.
-->'''Gimli:''' You could've picked a better spot...
** And then later, as the orcs get hyped for the upcoming battle.
--->'''Gimli:''' What's happening out there?\\
'''Legolas:''' Shall I describe it to you, or would you like me to find you a box?
*** There's then a pause, and Gimli actually ''[[ActuallyPrettyFunny laughs]]'' instead of getting angry, making this also something of a CMOH.
*** It gets better a moment later when Aragorn roams by to look out over the oncoming army...and stands behind Gimli so he can see through the gap.
*** "If it's luck you live by, let's hope it lasts the night." "Your friends are with you, Aragorn." "Let's hope ''they'' last the night."
* And who could forget PO-TAY-TOES!
-->[[MemeticMutation "Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew!"]]
* Éomer telling Gimli "I would cut off your head, Dwarf, if it stood but a little higher from the ground." This is undercut, though, by Legolas' immediate [=CMOA=] response ("You would die before your stroke fell!")
** The "Nice to meet you too, asshole" look on Gimli's face when he hears this is also quite humorous.
** As is his look of shock immediately after, when tensions reach the breaking point. He clearly didn't expect things to escalate so quickly.
** Then there's the exasperated expression on Aragorn's face as he motions for Legolas to lower his bow. You can almost hear him thinking, "I can't take you two '''anywhere'''..."

* Saruman reaching over to keep Wormtongue from holding a candle over a pot of gunpowder (which is also a ShoutOut to ''Film/ArmyOfDarkness''). A sort of Fridge Funny moment would be imagining just what would have happened if Saruman had been a little slower.
* Gimli versus Wargs. Kills one and it falls on top of him. While trying to lift the warg off an orc pokes its head up and he kills it, adding to the pile. Cue the second warg, a look of absolute OhCrap from Gimli...and [[RuleOfThree Aragorn kills it]], plunging [[HumiliationConga another massive heavy body on top of Gimli]]. Gimli's face, a mixture of OhCrap and YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe, really sells it.
** Before that as well, Gimli fell off the horse he was sharing with Legolas near immediately, saw a Warg coming for him only for it to be killed by Legolas and then the aforementioned happened to take him out of the rest of the battle.
---> '''Gimli''': ''To a Warg'' Bring your pretty face to my axe!\\
''Legolas rides by and shoots it''\\
'''Gimli''': That one counts as mine!
** Gimli also clearly doesn't approve of the Warg Riders' bathing schedule as he gives the orc a sniff after breaking its neck and obviously doesn't like what he smells.

* Gollum shrieking and wailing over Sam making a stew out of the rabbit he caught, complete with the immortal line, "Stupid fat hobbit!" -- particularly as Sam [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne only takes offense at "fat."]] The two then go on to argue about how best to prepare (or not prepare) food, sounding very much like two cooks fighting over who gets to grill at a barbecue.
* "Manflesh!" Then, the other Uruk-Hai looks ''upward''. Does he think Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli are ''flying'' after them?

* During the fight at Helm's Deep, Gimli and Legolas start up their contest again. Gimli has two, Legolas seventeen (helps that he was one of the archers before the orcs got ladders up.) Gimli's pissed that he's so far behind and his next attack puts his ax [[GroinAttack right into a climbing orc's family jewels]].
-->'''Gimli:''' Legolas! Two already!\\
'''Legolas:''' I'm on seventeen!\\
'''Gimli:''' Huh? I'll have no pointy-ear outscoring me! *cue GroinAttack*
** Also before that, an Uruk berserker is carving up elves left, right, and centre. Gimli dives forward, sliding along the ground and coming to a stop right under the Uruk, grinning evilly, and then brings his axe right up between the Uruk's legs.
* A blink and you'll miss it moment, while Aragon is shouting commands, an elf on his right reacts to another elf's quiver getting into his face before preparing an arrow.
* Then the next time we see him, he's standing on the wall between two ladders, and racking up a pretty impressive body count by knocking the Uruk-Hai off each one methodically, and having the time of his life with every kill. Becomes much funnier when you realize that this is how he obviously caught up to Legolas -- by being a CombatPragmatist. His very audible counting is what sells it, echoing well into the next shot of the far-off causeway.

* In the Extended Edition, Éowyn proudly offering Aragorn a bowl of [[LethalChef horrible-looking stew]] that she has concocted (which includes what looks like a large lump of [[NauseaFuel solid fat]]), and then watching him eat, so he has to choke the whole thing down. She turns away, he goes to immediately dump it out, and then she turns around and he accidentally sloshes half of the bowl of ''very hot stew'' all over his hands. This is almost immediately followed by Éowyn mentioning how her uncle talked about some of Aragorn's past exploits that shows [[OlderThanTheyLook how old Aragorn really is]], and Aragorn sheepishly admits that he's 87.
** Before she offers some to Aragorn, she passes by Gimli, who politely declines. The fact that '''''Gimli''''', the dwarf who casually downs {{Gargle Blaster}}s refuses to eat it should be a sign that neither should you.
** Remember that as a ranger, Aragorn himself probably had to survive on nasty edibles before and the stew in question is still able to turn him off immediately.
** The stew in question has reached memetic levels in recent times. Fans would say that the stew in question:
*** Was what really killed her parents in their attempts to avoid their daughter's cooking. Her father rode towards Orcs to avoid her cooking.
*** Knocked ''3 decades'' off Aragorn's lifespan resulting in him dying around the age of 210 as the average lifespan of the Dunedain is 240.
*** Killed the Witch-King of Angmar as she laced her sword in it. Alternatively, the flames that forged her sword was the same that was used to cook the stew.
*** Could've destroyed the '''One Ring''' if it was dropped into it.
*** The hidden reason why Aragorn chose Arwen.
* Gimli, about the Rohirrim: "You'd find more cheer in a graveyard."
* After reuniting with Gandalf (and learning that he CameBackStrong as "Gandalf the White"), Gimli says something bad about Fangorn Forest. The trees reply with groans of anger. Gimli immediately [[VerbalBackspace takes back his words]] and starts flattering them.
** Gets even funnier when Gandalf explains just ''why'' they have nothing to fear from Fangorn and playfully knocks Gimli for his concern:
--->'''Gandalf:''' A thing is about to happen that has not happened since the Elder Days: The Ents are going to wake up, and find that they are strong.\\
'''Gimli:''' Strong? ''[trees groan again]'' Oh, that's good.\\
'''Gandalf:''' So stop your fretting, Master Dwarf. Merry and Pippin are quite safe. In fact, [[GentlemanSnarker they are]] ''[[GentlemanSnarker far]]'' [[GentlemanSnarker safer than]] '''''[[GentlemanSnarker you]]''''' [[GentlemanSnarker are about to be]]!\\
'''Gimli:''' ''[to himself]'' This new Gandalf's more grumpy than the old one...
* Aragorn and Gimli are clearing the causeway of Helm's Deep. As the Rohan soldiers board up the breached door, Theoden yells at them to 'get out of there!'. Aragorn gives him a look that says 'seriously?' given them being blocked out and Uruks coming from behind. Cue Legolas standing on the ramparts with a rope yelling 'Aragorn!' in an overly dramatic fashion.
* There's something both heartwarming and hilarious about Aragorn hugging Haldir when the Elves first appear. Haldir is not a hugger.
* When Theoden yells at Aragorn to retreat into the keep of Helm's Deep, Gimli ''literally'' has to be hauled away by Legolas and another elf as he kicks and yells at them to stop it.
* Frodo and Sam are climbing down a cliff using the Elvish rope from Galadriel -- they realise they can't see the bottom due to fog when Sam loses his footing, asking Frodo to catch something that fell from his pocket (which turns out to be chicken seasoning), then causing Frodo to fall...[[AntiClimax a very short drop, it turns out.]]
-->'''Frodo:''' I think I've found the bottom.
** And then Sam laments about having to leave the real Elvish rope tied to the rock at the top of the cliff to continue their journey:
--->'''Sam:''' Well, there's nothing for it. It's one of my knots. [[TemptingFate Won't come free in a hurry]].\\
[''he pulls -- and the rope immediately unties and falls to the ground'']\\
'''Frodo:''' [''in a amused "well, damn" tone''] Real Elvish rope.
** This scene could be interpreted in two ways: either the rope magically untied itself due to its Elvish make, or Sam isn't actually as good as tying knots as he says he is.
*** WordOfGod is that the elven rope has a limited sapience, knowing when its master wants it to be tied and when they want it untied.
* Sam when Faramir asks his relationship to Frodo:
-->'''Faramir''': His bodyguard?\\
'''Sam''': [''dismissively''] His gardener.
* Aragorn's amusement being written on his face well before Gimli admitted that he needed to be tossed onto the causeway - he cottoned on quicker than the dwarf!
** Gimli's comment as well after making the request:
---> ''"Don't tell [[TheRival the elf]]."''
* Pippin's DoubleTake when he sees Treebeard.
* After running for several days on end to avoid Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli, even the orcs are considering unionizing.
-->''We're not going no further, '''till we've had a breather!'''''
* The contrast in the LockAndLoadMontage before the Battle of Helm's Deep. Théoden has his armour put on for him by Gamling and uses the free time to recite some (presumably traditional) poetry over a dramatic montage of the other men and boys of Rohan despondently taking up old weapons and putting on ill-fitting armor. Then there's Aragorn, who's calmly, efficiently, and methodically gearing up on his own without a word because [[SeenItAll this is just another day on the job for him.]]

* Frodo and Sam are climbing down a cliff using the Elvish rope from Galadriel -- they realise they can't see the bottom due to fog when Sam loses his footing, asking Frodo to catch something that fell from his pocket (which turns out to be [[spoiler:chicken seasoning]]), then causing Frodo to fall...[[AntiClimax a very short drop, it turns out.]]

-->'''Gandalf:''' "[[ADateWithRosiePalms Your fingers would remember their old strength better if they grasped your sword.]]"

'''Gimli:''' Huh? I'll have no pointy ear outscoring me! *cue GroinAttack*

* Then the next time we see him, he's standing on the wall between two ladders, and racking up a pretty impressive body count by knocking the Uruk-Hai off each one methodically. Becomes much funnier when you realize that this is how he obviously caught up to Legolas -- by being a CombatPragmatist. His very audible count sells it, echoing into the next shot.

[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/eown_stew.png]]
[[caption-width-right:350:Aragorn faces his greatest challenge: Trying [[LethalChef Eowyn's]] stew.]]

** The mere fact that the AlwaysChaoticEvil Orcs are clearly about to mutiny after running for three days straight and demand a break.

* When the lead Uruk-hai, Ugluk, reminds his restless soldiers that Saruman wants Merry and Pippin ''alive'', one particularly smartass Orc asks "Wot about their legs? [[LoopholeAbuse They don't need those to live!]]"

** Then there's the exasperated expression on Aragorn's face as he motions for Legolas to lower his bow. You can almost hear him thinking, ''I can't you two '''anywhere'''...''

** The "Nice to meet you too, asshole"-like look on Gimli's face when he hears this is also quite humorous.

** Then there's the exasperated expression on Aragorn's face as he motions for Legolas to lower his bow. You can almost hear him thinking, ''I can't take my friends '''anywhere''' in public.''

** "We ain't had nothing to eat but maggoty bread for THREE STINKIN' DAYS!"