History Funny / HarryPotterHogwartsMystery

* In a side quest in your second year, your character must learn how to brew a Fire-Breathing potion...which means approaching Snape. While he grumpily acquiesces to your request, and ramping up your Empathy can ensure that this discussion doesn't crash and [[IncrediblyLamePun burn]] as badly as it could, it won't spare you Snape's reaction to your relentless cheerfulness and lack of tact:

* Flitwick gets a couple moments that double as [[SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome awesome]] in a side quest regarding Rita Skeeter. She's running a ''Daily Prophet'' contest to find the new Face of Hogwarts and has been observing everybody's classes. The professors are none too keen on this, and Flitwick calls it an "obnoxious interruption." Rita then asks, "What could be more obnoxious than you?" Flitwick responds, "Your perfume, for starters."

* Another one for the Rita Skeeter side quest, Bill wants to win the competition and make the papers before his brothers make it for exploding something.

* Madame Rakepick threatens Madame Rosmerta... who is having ''none'' of it and successfully fends her off. This is the same Rakepick who has bullied Filch ''and the school ghosts'' into giving her information. A small threat from Rosmerta that some of her best customers are Aurors and people from the Department of Magical Law Inforcement is enough to make Rakepick leave. Apparently, James Potter and Sirius Black often behaved in her pub. ''Now'' we see why.

* The Prefect sidequest presents you with the poacher-turned-gamekeeper dilemma which is wryly funny in its total hypocrisy -- can the player, a notorious rulebreaker, who is pretty much in charge of a friendship circle of notorious rulebreakers, bring themselves to enforce the same rules that they flout? You're sent out to the courtyard to deal with your House's discipline problems to find out. Rowan muses that they saw a Ravenclaw turn a toad into a unicorn. Guess who that Ravenclaw is? No, the first two don't count. Yes, you guessed it - Cue Tulip "No Sense Of Self Preservation" Karasu:

** [=McGonnagall=] acts shocked upon seeing Merula when the Player and her finally decide to ask her for help, but not because of anything bad. She just found Miss Snyde very adorable.

* One conversation with Snape leads to him shutting down your request by asking, "[[TemptingFate Do I look like a house elf to you?]]". If you have enough nerve coupled with a high enough courage stat, you can actually say yes. Snape is so taken aback by your response that you don't even lose any house points for it (though he does imply that he would flay you if Dumbledore didn't forbid corporal punishment).
--> '''You''': Now that you mention it, I can see the resemblance. Does the headmaster ever ask you to dust the furniture?
--> '''Snape''': No, but he has asked me not to flay students who think they are smart.

** The third task of th Christmas sidequest is playing Wizard Chess with Rowan. At one point, straight-laced, bookish Rowan resorts to cheating by [[LookBehindYou pointing at something behind MC]] and swapping two game pieces while MC's back is turned.

* During the Valentine's Day Event sidequest, Snape showcases Armotentia, a very strong love potion, so everyone can commit it to memory and avoid it in the future. But honestly, what did he ''think'' would happen when introducing a bunch of [[HormoneAddledTeenager hormonal teenagers]] to a very illegal love potion?
** Barnaby asking Snape about the smell of the potion.

** Snape specifically tells everyone ''not'' to sniff the potion. What does everyone immediately do? ''Sniff the potion''.

** And then the dialogue afterwards is solid gold:

* Gilderoy Lockhart comes to Hogwarts in the Valentine's Day event of 2020. Whenever you enter into an activity involving him, "ItsAllAboutMe" indeed; Gilderoy is the ''only'' interactable you can spend energy on to make progress.

* In the Valentine's Day ball, the Player's date sets up a Storybook Romance for them with the help of the Magical Reserve fairy. If the Player hasn't adopted a Fairy or you just didn't know you could even name them, the fairy is just named 'Fairy'.

** When the Player, Jae, and Penny attempt to brew a Calming Draught to cure the Player's stage fright, Jae accidentally adds too much peppermint oil, which burn the player's mouth. He brings the Player to Professor [=McGonnagall=] to fix it, which is strange considering Snape is the potions professor. Here's why:

-->'''[=McGonnagall=]:''' Trust me, Mr Kim, I can ''also'' be proper frightening when necessary.

* While setting up for the Valentines Ball, Barnaby helps the Player wrangle up the fairies to help light the ball. He then mistakes the Player's fairy for their date for the ball.

*** In [[HilariousInHindsight hindsight]], it's even more hilarious if you consider that fact that Barnaby named his knarl, Knarl, in the ''Enchanted Kiss'' sidequest.

* On Valentine's Day, it's implied that Amortentia smells like the Player to her. It's funny in hindsight as she once belittled the Player for smelling like a mangy dog/cat/bird in the Animagus sidequest. Guess she just actually likes that smell, huh?

* The side quest - ''A Very Weasley Christmas'' - has Dumbledore say "Actually, I rather enjoyed the snow. I cannot remember the last time I threw a snowball. Though I doubt Professor Snape found it as amusing as I did." What this implies is that Dumbledore ''started randomly throwing snowballs at Snape and found it rather amusing.'’

--> '''Flitwick:''' I expect all of you [[GagPenis to demonstrate maturity and]] [[GagBoobs restraint while casting this spell.]]

--> '''Merula:''' [[SycophanticServant Malfoy would]] [[{{Squick}} snog a Fire Crab]] if Voldemort told him to.

--> '''Merula:''' [[SycophanticServant Malfoy would]] [[Squick snog a Fire Crab]] if Voldemort told him to.

* The first time Merula challenges you to a duel, you can choose to either walk away or cast a spell at her. Due to taking place before you learn any actual duelling spells, if you choose to attack her you'll cast the only spell you learned: ''Lumos''.

--> '''Snape:''' Your eyes dart back and forth ever so slightly when you aren’t telling the truth, Miss Snyde. You are an absolutely atrocious liar. [[DoWrongRight particularly for a Slytherin.]]

** * While Lucius Malfoy visits the school, Dumbledore calls you to his office. Snape only says that you will see what he has to deal with on a daily basis. There comes the most difficult task of the quest... babysitting [[SpoiledBrat Draco]].

*** They then decide to use Incendio. The fact [=McGonagall=] feels the need to remind Snape to cast the spell away from Ben so as not to burn him is hilarious, and Snape's annoyed "...Fine" more so. It becomes even funnier if you question whether Snape's annoyed that Minerva is telling him [[WouldHurtAChild not to burn a student]], or [[EveryoneHasStandards insulted that she felt the need to make such obvious warning]] (whether because she doesn't trust him or his common sense).

-->'''[[DeadpanSnarker Snape]]:''' [[StoppedCaring I never said he would ''survive.'']]

-->'''McGonagall:''' Along with his ''flesh.''

*** They then decide to use Incendio. The fact McGonagall feels the need to remind Snape to cast the spell away from Ben so as not to burn him is hilarious, and Snape's annoyed "...Fine" more so. It becomes even funnier if you question whether Snape's annoyed that Minerva is telling him [[WouldHurtAChild not to burn a student]], or [[EveryoneHasStandards insulted that she felt the need to make such obvious warning]] (whether because she doesn't trust him or his common sense).

-->'''Ben:''' I-I'm c-cold...

* In the side quest, ''Meet The Malfoys'', we learn that, apparently, ''Merlin had a favourite fluffy bathrobe!''

* While Lucius Malfoy visits the school, Dumbledore calls you to his office. Snape only says that you will see what he has to deal with on a daily basis. There comes the most difficult task of the quest... babysitting Draco.

-->'''[[ApatheticTeacher Snape:]]''' [[Deadpan Snarker Obviously.]]