History Funny / GTARadio

** [[TheCameo Not just any man, mind you]] - [[WesternAnimation/AquaTeenHungerForce it's Carl]].

* [[CaptainMurphy Flying Lotus]] takes a break from [=DJing FLyLo=] FM to answer some callers:

* Maurice Chavez's "Pressing Issues" radio show in ''GTA Vice City'' is probably the best thing in the game. Particularly when Pastor Richards shoots a nudist:

* From an action movie trailer in ''Grand Theft Auto: Vice City'':
-->"They kidnapped your wife!\\
But I'm not married!\\
You are now! '''TO AMERICA!'''

* An advert for San Andreas Telephone in SA:
-->'''Caller''': Hello, is Mark there?\\
'''Mark''': ...Yeah?\\
'''Caller''': It's me, Shanon. We met at Jack's party?\\
'''Mark''': Yeah! How can I forget, wow how are you doing? I haven't heard from you in, uh...\\
'''Caller''': Nine months?\\
''[Long pause as a baby starts crying in the background.]''.

-->'''Caller:''' We all know it's common knowledge; polio's like a snake bite. You just suck out the poison. People in wheelchairs are quitters!

-->'''Trevor:''' Ron, you there? You better not put me on your show you fucking prick or I'll drink the blood from your still pumping veins!\\

-->'''Protestor:''' Liberty City was great, before phones ruined everything.
-->'''Lazlo:''' Liberty City was a church, a cow pasture, and three houses when the phone was invented.
-->'''Protestor:''' LIAR!
-->'''Lazlo:''' You're the liar!
-->'''Protestor:''' Liar, liar, pants on fire!
-->'''Lazlo:''' What are you? Are you three years old?
-->'''Protestor:''' Lazlo's a liar, Lazlo's a liar! I bet that isn't even your real name!\\

-->"They kidnapped your wife!"
-->"But I'm not married!"
-->"You are now! '''TO AMERICA!'''"

--> '''Lazlow''': ''Hello, caller, you're on the air! Are you sane? Are you a sane caller?''
--> '''Caller''': ''Absolutely, Lazlow. [[EverythingsWorseWithBees Killer bees]]!''
--> '''Lazlow''': ''K-killer bees.''
--> '''Caller''': ''Yes! Killer bees! Did you know that if the current migration north continues, we will be dead in three years? Do you want to become a bee supper? I don't. That's why we must act now! Killer bees'' must ''be stopped!''
--> '''Lazlow''': ''I wonder why more people aren't talking about this. I mean, killer bees swarming; it sounds pretty serious.''
--> '''Caller''': ''Ah -- but the killer bees are nothing compared to ants! You can't kill them. They are like sheep! They're going to take over!''
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=Mqyi0Iv2CdI#t=1365 DON'T YOU GO DISRESPECTING COCONUT WATER]]
--> Topped only by the realization that what he thought was Tibet was actually Wales

--> '''Caller''': ''Hello, is Mark there?''
--> '''Mark''': ''...Yeah?''
--> '''Caller''': ''It's me, Shanon. We met at Jack's party?''
--> '''Mark''': ''Yeah! How can I forget, wow how are you doing? I haven't heard from you in, uh...''
--> '''Caller''': ''Nine months?''
--> ''Long pause as a baby starts crying in the background''.

--> Topped only by the realization that what he thought was Tibet was actually Wales

* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=Mqyi0Iv2CdI#t=1365 DON'T YOU GO DISRESPECTING COCONUT WATER]]

--> '''Caller''': ''Ah -- but the killer bees are nothing compared to ants! You can't kill them. They are like sheep! They're going to take over!''

--> "HOW DO YOU LIKE AMERICA ''NOW'', MOTHERFUCKER?!"

--> '''Ryan''': "I tell you what, Mr. Mason, just drill them both, please. Just hurry up, because that's just about all the time for folks this week on the Pacemaker." *[[SoundtrackDissonace Pleasant jingle plays]] as Mason drills his victims' heads while Ryan continues coaxing him to stop*

--> '''Announcer:''' Welcome back to ''Just or Unjust'' with the Case of the Stolen Truck and the Underage Fuck!

Due to the nature of every ShowWithinAShow in Grand Theft Auto, it can be argued that the entire concept is one Crowning Moment of Funny. Here are some specific ones though.

-->'''Maurice:''' ''Dios mio'', he shot him! T-There's blood and pubic hair all over the studio! Ladies and gentlemen, it is complete pandemonium here on "Pressing Issues" with your award-winning and soon-to-be-executed host Maurice Chavez...

* This quote is from an interview segment with a cop in ''GTA San Andreas:'' "Yeah I work undercover in a crackhouse. It's great, I get to smoke crack everyday! I even brought my wife undercover and made her a crackwhore! Say hi to the newsman, bitch!"

--> '''Announcer:''' Welcome back to Just or Unjust with the Case of the Stolen Truck and the Underage Fuck!

--> '''Ryan:''' "I tell you what, Mr. Mason, just drill them both, please. Just hurry up, because that's just about all the time for folks this week on the Pacemaker." *[[SoundtrackDissonace Pleasant jingle plays]] as Mason drills his victims' heads while Ryan continues coaxing him to stop*

** [[RefugeInAudacity The Republican Space Rangers,]] [[CrossesTheLineTwice just dear god, the Republican Space Rangers.]] The following quote pretty much sums the whole [[ShowWithinAShow show]] up:
--> Alien: "Oh my god... [[PunctuatedForEmphasis You're. A.]] [[PrecisionFStrike FUCKING.]] [[PunctuatedForEmphasis Moron.]]"

--> "You just can't argue with Music/DepecheMode. I've tried. You just can't do it. I asked [[FaceOfTheBand David Gaughan]] to move into my house. He said no."

* The radio stations also contain some gems. One from ''Grand Theft Auto: Vice City'':

-->'''Maurice:''' ''Dios mio'', he shot him! T-There's blood and pubic hair all over the studio! I am sorry, this is "Pressing Issues" with your award-winning and soon-to-be-executed host Maurice Chavez...

* "Dragon Stance!"

--> Alien: "Oh my god... [[PunctuatedForEmphasis You're. A.]] [[PrecisionFStrike FUCKING.]] [[PunctuatedForEmphasis Moron.]]"

--> '''Ryan:''' "I tell you what, Mr. Mason, just drill them both, please. Just hurry up, because that's just about all the time for folks this week on the Pacemaker." *[[SoundtrackDissonace Pleasant jingle plays]] as Mason drills his victims' heads as Ryan continues to ask him to stop*

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GTA IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into one of the two other interviewees' head for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how [[DissonantSerenity nonchalant]] Ryan [=McFallon=], the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, first asking for Mason to calm down, than calmly saying this when Mason is unsure of who to drill as the show's running time is nearly over:

* Pretty much ''any'' time you turn on the TV in ''VideoGame/GrandTheftAuto 4''.

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GTA IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into one of the two other interviewees' head for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how [[DissonantSerenity nonchalant]] Ryan [=McFallon=], the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, initially asking to Mason to calm down, before calmly saying this when Mason is hesitant about who to drill:
--> '''Ryan:''' I...I...know you're not messing around. I tell you what, Mr. Mason, just drill them both, please. Just hurry up, because that's just about all the time for folks this week on the Pacemaker." *[[SoundtrackDissonace Pleasant jingle plays]] as Mason drills his victims' heads, while Ryan continues to ask him to stop*

--> '''Ryan:''' I...I...know you're not messing around. I tell you what, Mr. Mason, just drill them both, please. Just hurry up, because that's just about all the time for folks this week on the Pacemaker." *[[SoundtrackDissonace Cue pleasant jingle playing]] as Mason drills his victims' heads, while Ryan continues to ask him to stop*

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GTA IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into one of the two other interviewees' head for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how [[TheComicallySerious nonchalant]] Ryan [=McFallon=], the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, initially asking to Mason to calm down, before calmly saying this when Mason is hesitant about who to drill:

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GTA IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into one of the two other interviewees' head for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how [[DissonantSerenity nonchalant]] Ryan [=McFallon=], the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, initially asking to Mason to calm down, before calmly saying this when Mason is hesitant about who to drill:

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GTA IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into one of the two other interviewees' head for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how [[DissonantSerenity nonchalant]] Ryan McFallon, the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, initially asking to Mason to calm down, before calmly saying this when Mason is hesitant about who to drill:

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GTA IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into one of the two other interviewees' head for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how [[DissonantSerenity nonchalant]] Mike Riley, the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, initially asking to Mason to calm down, before calmly saying this when Mason is hesitant about who to drill:
--> '''Mike:''' I...I...know you're not messing around. I tell you what, Mr. Mason, just drill them both, please. Just hurry up, because that's just about all the time for folks this week on the Pacemaker." *[[SoundtrackDissonace Cue pleasant jingle playing]] as Mason drills his victims' heads, while Mike continues to ask him to stop*

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GTA IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into one of the two other interviewees' head for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how nonchalant Mike Riley, the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, initially asking to Mason to calm down, before calmly saying this when Mason is hesitant about who to drill:

* Everything about the end of the Pacemaker talk show on PLR in GT IV. Waylon Mason, driven to RageBreakingPoint, whips out a drill with the intention of drilling into the heads of two other interviewees for testing his patience. What makes the scene is how nonchalant Mike Riley, the show's host, is throughout the entire situation, initially asking to Mason to calm down, before calmly saying this:
--> '''Mike:''' I...I...know you're not messing around. I tell you what, Mr. Mason, just drill them both, please. Just hurry up, because that's just about all the time for folks this week on the Pacemaker." *[[SoundtrackDissonace Cue pleasant jingle playing]] as Mason drills his victim heads, while Mike continues to ask him to stop*

* The radio stations also contain some gems. One from ''Grand Theft Auto: Vice City'':
-->"They kidnapped your wife!"
-->"But I'm not married!"
-->"You are now! '''TO AMERICA!'''"
* The talk radio stations can be absolutely hilarious. This quote is from an interview segment with a cop in ''San Andreas:'' "Yeah I work undercover in a crackhouse. It's great, I get to smoke crack everyday! I even brought my wife undercover and made her a crackwhore! Say hi to the newsman, bitch!"

* Pretty much ''any'' time you turn on the TV in ''VideoGame/GrandTheftAuto 4''.
** [[RefugeInAudacity The Republican Space Rangers,]] [[CrossesTheLineTwice just dear god, the Republican Space Rangers.]] The following quote pretty much sums the whole [[ShowWithinAShow show]] up:
--> Alien: "Oh my god... [[PunctuatedForEmphasis You're. A.]] [[PrecisionFStrike FUCKING.]] [[PunctuatedForEmphasis Moron.]]"

* Maurice Chavez's "Pressing Issues" radio show in ''Vice City'' is probably the best thing in the game. Particularly when Pastor Richards shoots a nudist:

* This snippet from Just or Unjust on GTAIV's WKTT
--> '''Announcer:''' Welcome back to Just or Unjust with the Case of the Stolen Truck and the Underage Fuck!