History Funny / DCAbridgedUniverseMovies

* Green Lantern lampshades that Batman sounds [[GutturalGrowler constipated]]. Later when Green Lantern takes leadership he proceeds to do a Batman impression [[DidISayThatOutLoud without realizing it]]. Wonder Woman's response?

* When Superman comes back from Apokolips to finish off Darkseid, he proceeds to sing [[IncrediblyLamePun "O Say, Can You See" while using his heat vision on his eyes before closing with a "No you can't".]] Finally, ending with this one-liner.

-->'''Superman:''' Oh thank god, I got here in time!! [[BaitAndSwitch That black guy with a hammer was totally going to steal your wallets!!]] Hey you! Don't [[IncrediblyLamePun steal!]]

-->'''Superman:''' My turn now! The [[IncrediblyLamePun Fist]] Amendmen-- (''gets stabbed'') argargag.

* The entire scene in the male strip club. When Charlie Trevor debuts on stage:

* Deadshot finding out that [[Film/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy King Shark's vocabulary is limited to]] [[PokemonSpeak "I Am A Shark" in that order]], bonus points for the fact that the guy's VA is [[Creator/TeamFourStar Takahata101]].

** And then he wakes up in front of Alfred and [[NamesTheSame Dick]].

* Amanda Waller's entire EstablishingCharacterMoment. SassyBlackWoman taken UpToEleven!!

** Ares saying that Dionysus has got himself [[UpToEleven even fatter than usual]].

* The day is saved but they have [[RealityEnsues a lynch mob on their heels due to the large-scale collateral rampage]]. They had to ask the President to officially recognize them as the Justice League of America to avoid bad PR.

* RealityEnsues in probably the most hilarious way possible in form of the heroes that didn't wear any mouth equipment saying gurgled speech underwater.

* Upon his coronation, he suggests that his kingship be like England (Compromise between the royal family and democratic government). Superman screams "NO!!" in the background, [[RealityEnsues which is gurgled because he isn't wearing any mouthpiece]].

* When Owlman shows [[spoiler: [[Comicbook/{{Watchmen}} the Comedian's badge]]]] to Batman, [[RealityEnsues he doesn't recognize it.]]

** Superman uses his heat vision to cut up Lex Luthor's warsuit. When the latter threatens to sue him, Superman asks what's his name as [[RealityEnsues he needs it for a court case.]] Luthor can only retort in frustration.

-->'''John:''' Arthur, listen to me. If you want a women to like you, you have walk up to her, look her dead in the eye and say (''incomprehensible lobster mating call'').

** [[spoiler:Superman!Batman saying that he can't hit a women, but [[ExactWords nothing is said about throwing batarangs at them]].]]

* Wonder Women immediately gets the Lasso of Truth on Zoom to force the information about how to disarm the bombs when it's clear that Batman won't have enough time to disarm them. This exchange is glorious:

* Turning Earth-3's Lex and Jester into [[WesternAnimation/RickandMorty Rick and Morty]].

* The entire film is filled with Disney/TheLittleMermaid references, mostly by the Atlanteans. Complete with [[{{Expy}} their version]] of Sebastian the Crab, John the Lobster, who is also an expy of Dr. Zoidberg from Futurama.

-->'''Amanda:''' I'm Amanda Waller and you can think of me as your fairy godmother from hell. Only, I won't be grant any wishes no [[Disney/{{Cinderella}} bibidi bobidi boo]] or any of that shbang. But rather making each and everyone of you, my bitch!!

--->'''Cyborg:''' Oh my god, Wonder Woman's [[Disney/OneHundredAndOneDalmatians Cruella de Vil.]] And I'm the puppies!

* Killer Frost explaining her origin story of spontaneously generating ice from her hands and killing her parents, Harley Quinn immediately calls her [[Disney/{{Frozen}} Elsa and asks if she has an Anna.]]

-->'''Superman:''' My turn now!! The [[IncrediblyLamePun Fist]] Amendmen-- (''gets stabbed'') argargag.

* To revive Cyborg he had to use his tazer on his core.

-->'''Harley Quinn:''' [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Good enough to know that you are an over-compensating omega male afraid of of not being taken seriously while cowboy over here is an emotionally detached sociopath, Frosty's committing way too hard on the whole ice thing and I'm pretty sure spider is still bats.]]

'''Dick:''' That... never happened.

-->'''Wonder Woman:''' [[CrossesTheLineTwice Oh NOW i understand what Bruce keeps crying about!]]

* [[FridgeLogic The reason why the American armed forces aren't helping the Amazons or even show up?]] The president is busy playing ''VideoGame/PokemonDiamondAndPearl'' in his bunker. It's 2006, meaning that the president got an early localised copy from Japan as Western release started over the course of 2007.

* Victor Stone's football game has him using Franchise/{{Ghostbusters}} references for his plays. The sports commentators just roll along with it while the entire audience save for one Billy Bastion don't get it.

** Batman sneaks up to Dassad by posing as a talking [[TheUnintelligible parademon]].

-->'''Superman:''' My turn now!! The [[IncrediblyLamePun Fist]] Amendmen- (''gets stabbed'') argargag.

-->'''Aquaman:''' [[NotSoAboveItAll Oh my god, that felt amazing-]][[DoubleTake err, I mean]] if only we could have resolved this peacefully, without any violence brother.

-->'''Deadshot:''' [[AtomicFBomb FUUUUU---]]

-->'''Guard:''' [[TooDumbToLive I heard all that but I'm coming down anyway]], [[TemptingFate I mean what's the worst that could happen anyway-]](''gets chomped on by King Shark'') ohgodthatanswersmyquestion (''gets pulled underwater'')

-->'''Carl:''' Me too, Bob. [[TooDumbToLive I'm just going to walk into the shadows where we heard that laugh and-]](gets neck snapped)

-->'''Batman:''' No! He was peo-[[SubvertedCatchphrase no actually I'm ok with that.]]

-->'''Alfred:''' (''Wielding a shotgun'') The hell it does! That's my job ya stupid boy!

-->'''Alfred:''' And he did! My god he made that sandwich everyday and I just dangled it in front of his sad little face while he ate nothing but tuna. Disgusting tuna!! HAWHAWHAWHAW!!
** Alfred was the REAL reason Bruce left the house and travelled the world only coming back to claim his mansion when he is of legal age. The whole training part was a side thing.

* Damien cockblocking Bruce, to the extent that it got him friendzoned.

** [[spoiler:And then he wakes up in front of Alfred and [[NamesTheSame Dick]].]]

-->'''God(?):''' Eh? I'm busy here. Find your own spot!!

* Vandal Savage calling dinosaurs "entitled [[PrecisionFStrike fucks]]" and stated that the meteor made him "five times smarter" and gave him immortality. Since he was a caveman at that time when dinosaurs are somehow still around, Ma'alefa'ak states that this isn't exactly a monumental achievement. He even invented the wheel later that night!!

--->'''Jor-El:''' Here are a few tips of you want to make it there. Number one: [[{{Eagleland}} America good, everyone else bad.]] Number two: [[Series/MightyMorphinPowerRangers Too much pink energy is not good.]] That means don't trust the women Kal. Number three:-
--->'''Vandal Savage:''' For you see, I was-
--->'''The rest of the legion:''' [[BrickJoke You were there.]] We know we get it.

-->'''[[spoiler: Dr Manhattan:]]''' [[spoiler: Ok fine! But just this once! ''(snaps fingers and the Earth becomes intangible)'']]

* Superman having his head screwed on right for once and actually gives a genuine heartwarming statement about how the Justice League is nothing without Batman...just like how America is nothing without guns. Batman understandably groans about how he ruined the moment.

-->'''Zoom:''' Well...[[TakeThat I’ve been retconned so many times I...heh...I don't even know who I am anymore!!]]

* Flash hopes that [[TemptingFate it's the last he has to see of Zoom]]...cue ominous thunder with a flash of [[spoiler: Dr Manhattan's upper face]] in the storm.

** Nabu expelling Charlie for getting the [[spoiler:Get Out of Hell Free card]] stolen.

* Charlie being arrested by the cops for being nude. Even the excuse of "being kidnapped by some weirdoes in their birthday suit" is actually common according to the police!!

* When the Suicide Squad enter Vandal Savage's lair, a certain individual arrives to greet them. It's [[spoiler: Alfred.]] After the meeting and hearing the EvilLaugh, Captain Boomerang admits that [[BringMeMyBrownPants he just shit himself.]]

** Alfred coming out with his shotgun and [[BlatantLies saying self-defence while deliberately firing on the Talons]].

[[folder: Suicide Squad Abridged 2: Ticket To Heck]]

* Everyone is convinced that Bronze Tiger is just Batman in disguise throughout the film due having too many similarities with him for their liking ([[CallBack again]]). [[spoiler: It takes him actually dying for real at the end to convince Deadshot otherwise. And restore the latter's trust in black people.]]

-->'''Green Lantern:''' (''ring fizzes out'') Ah crap, forgot to charge this thing. [[MotorMouth Inbrightestdayinblackestnightnoevilshallescapemysightforthosewhoworshipevil'smightbewaremypowergreenlanternslight]] (''signal starts up'') Ah there we go!!

* Everyone is convinced that Bronze Tiger is just Batman in disguise ([[CallBack again]]). [[spoiler: It takes him actually dying for real at the end to convince Deadshot otherwise. And restore the latter's trust in black people.]]

* Everyone is convinced that Bronze Tiger is just Batman in disguise ([[CallBack again]]). [[spoiler: It takes him actually dying for real at the end to convince Deadshot otherwise. And restore the latter's trust in black people!]]

* Everyone is convinced that Bronze Tiger is just Batman in disguise [[CallBack again]]). [[spoiler: It takes him actually dying for real at the end to convince him otherwise. And restore his trust in black people!]]

-->'''Wonder Women:''' Oh huff. I am a warrior, Steve. I will not sit idly by and chatter with empty headed politicians like that [[TakeThat Clinton]] guy you introduced me. [[MythologyGag The man kept asking if I was an intern for some reason.]]

* Green Lantern lampshades that Batman sounds [[GutturalGrowler constipated]]. Later when Green Lantern takes leadership he proceeds to do a Batman impression [[DidISayThatOutLoud without realizing it]]. Wonder Women's response?
-->'''Wonder Women:''' [[BrickJoke You sounded constipated, like our bat comrade!]]

-->'''Wonder Women:''' I appreciate thy assistance Superman but I can handle a fool.

-->'''Wonder Women:''' Make that two fools...

* When the Justice League attack Darkseid, Captain Marvel goes LeeroyJenkins on the team. After getting sent flying aside, Wonder Women [[WhatTheHellHero chews him out]] and threatens him that she will turn him into ''[[GroinAttack Miss Marvel]]'' if he does that again.

* When Superman asks Wonder Women what should he do in the event that he would have to live through the [[spoiler:infamous neck-snapping scene]] from ''Film/ManOfSteel'' and she even admits that there is no right answer since everyone has a different sense of justice, it turns out that he asked that question because he killed Dassad upon breaking out.

** Wonder Women asks what's Website/YouTube. Steve tells her that she is better off not touching that hot potato. She may have caught up to modern technology, but she is clueless about Internet culture and trolls.

* Steve is worried about his chances with Wonder Women. Cyborg tells him not to worry about it since Wonder Women's relationship with Superman will end once he finds out that she is Greek.

* Superman and Wonder Women's date ending with the former learning that the latter is not from [[BrickJoke Hawaii]].

-->'''Batman:''' (''[[RuleOfThree shows that he stole the ring a third time]]'') It's [[Literature/LordOfTheRings my precious]] now, Hal.
* Superman and Wonder Women ClarkKenting at a Greek restaurant. He actually admits that the food is good but he is sassing the waiter until they get the manager because it is customary in America. Wonder Women decides to join in on the fun.
-->'''Wonder Women:''' It is true. This moosaka tastes like the dropping of a mighty griffin Zeus killed and then proceeded to have sex with!!
* Lois Lane interviewing Wonder Women about Themyscira. It ends with Lois casually asking where can she sign up.

-->(''After Wonder Women tells them about Atlantis'')

* Wonder Women [[InsaneTrollLogic thinking Lois Lane is trained in combat just because she wants to]] [[BrickJoke sign up to be an Amazon.]] Lois calls it quits after lying to her about flanking them.

-->'''Ocean Master:''' Eh, to hell with the gods!! I'll kill you myself!! (''sends Wonder Women flying'')

--->Wonder Women: Super Xena

[[folder:Wonder Women Abridged]]

* When talking about Ares' cult, Wonder Women wonders if they are fighting Nazis since they keep talking about purity. Steve says that the Nazis nowadays go by the term [[TakeThat "alt-right"]].

* Wonder Women calls out Steve for choosing to save her over chasing down Ares for the sake of impressing her and he wouldn't have don't the same thing if it was Batman or Superman. Steve states that if [[{{Superdickery}} Superman]] was the man down in question, he would had left him behind.

* Wonder Women asks Ares to go hell. Ares tells her that [[InsultBackfire he just went there and the weather's not bad.]]

** Wonder Women is barely containing an urge to eat Cheetah. When the latter asks her to go to hell, Wonder Woman says that [[InsultBackfire Hades is a friend.]]

* The carnage Wonder Women is causing thanks to the nanomachines in her head. The battered police officers trying to restrain her understandably got their butts kicked. When Cyborg steps in, the squad leader has this to say:

** The first thing Cyborg asks Wonder Women? "Calm your tits-"''(gets sent flying)''

** The whole of Atlantis proceeds to bow down to him in respect and awe of his singing. Strangely enough, the viewers were surprised as they were expecting a bad voice for RuleOfFunny. The surprise and in turn praise is genuine in the comments section to the extent that [[CrowningMusicOfAwesome they asked for a full cover]].

* When Owlman shows [[spoiler [[Comicbook/{{Watchmen}} the Comedian's badge]]]] to Batman, [[RealityEnsues he doesn't recognize it.]]

* When the LegionOfDoom is celebrating, they celebrate the serious ways they broke the League. Then Bane reveals his BondVillainStupidity. Vandal calls him out on it while hoping that Bane at least handcuffed Batman (he didn't). Cue VillainousBreakdown complete with this icing:

* The faith the rest of the League have in Superman and Green Lantern when asked to stop the missile.

* The various ways the League dispatch the Legion. Special mention of goes to Green Lantern who says that he grown out of his man-child phase while [[Hypocrite defeating Star Sapphire with a giant sling-shot.]]

* [[ItMakesSenseInCntext "It's made babies! I have to kill the babies!"]]