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Yes, but making a whip out of them that manages to disembowel effortlessly? With a real scapel, that\'s tough as hell, but... it\'s Machete. Machete don\'t need no real life.
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* AbsurdlySharpBlade: Machete's... machetes, and the scalpels he later uses.
** TruthInTelevision, where the scalpels are concerned. They're made specifically to cut human flesh with ease.
** TruthInTelevision, where the scalpels are concerned. They're made specifically to cut human flesh with ease.
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* AbsurdlySharpBlade: Machete's... machetes, and the scalpels scalpel whip he later uses.
** TruthInTelevision, where the scalpels are concerned. They're made specifically to cut human flesh with ease.uses.
** TruthInTelevision, where the scalpels are concerned. They're made specifically to cut human flesh with ease.
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In 2007, Rodriguez filmed parts of ''Machete'' for a fake trailer attached to the beginning of ''{{Grindhouse}}''. After making another [[{{Shorts}} children's film]], he revisited ''Machete'' and set about making it into an actual film. The final product includes [[AscendedMeme every scene from the fake trailer]], and gained massive popularity as the quintessential exploitation action flick parody of the 00's. It boasts an impressive cast, including DannyTrejo, StevenSeagal, RobertDeNiro, [[CheechAndChong Cheech Marin]], JessicaAlba, LindsayLohan, MichelleRodriguez, and more.
to:
In 2007, Rodriguez filmed parts of ''Machete'' for a fake trailer attached to the beginning of ''{{Grindhouse}}''. After making another [[{{Shorts}} children's film]], he revisited ''Machete'' and set about making it into an actual film. The final product includes [[AscendedMeme every scene from the fake trailer]], and gained massive popularity as the quintessential exploitation action flick parody of the 00's. It boasts an impressive cast, including DannyTrejo, StevenSeagal, RobertDeNiro, [[CheechAndChong Cheech Marin]], JessicaAlba, Creator/JessicaAlba, LindsayLohan, MichelleRodriguez, and more.
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* {{Fanservice}}: Lessee. Gratuitous nudity about three minutes into the movie. [[FanDisservice Too bad girl in question gets blown away.]] You got [[spoiler: LindsayLohan (actually a body double, although she's pretty close herself later on) and her character's mother topless and making out with Machete in her daddy's swimming pool.]] There's also [[spoiler: JessicaAlba showing ''almost'' everything in a ShowerScene. Damn elbow placement!]] Oh, yeah, the guys (and some girls) will like.
to:
* {{Fanservice}}: Lessee. Gratuitous nudity about three minutes into the movie. [[FanDisservice Too bad girl in question gets blown away.]] You got [[spoiler: LindsayLohan (actually a body double, although she's pretty close herself later on) and her character's mother topless and making out with Machete in her daddy's swimming pool.]] There's also [[spoiler: JessicaAlba Creator/JessicaAlba showing ''almost'' everything in a ShowerScene. Damn elbow placement!]] Oh, yeah, the guys (and some girls) will like.
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* SpicyLatina: Not just MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl for this trope but also JessicaAlba who rarely plays this role, as well as several more. The nude woman in the opening scene also counts.
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* SpicyLatina: Not just MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl for this trope but also JessicaAlba Creator/JessicaAlba who rarely plays this role, as well as several more. The nude woman in the opening scene also counts.
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Changed line(s) 72 (click to see context) from:
** [[FridgeBrilliance Machete don't hit unarmed men.]]
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** [[FridgeBrilliance Machete don't hit unarmed men.]]
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* OneHandedShotgunPump: Done by the priest. With ''two'' shotguns at once.
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** TruthInTelevision, where the scalpels are concerned. They're made specifically to cut human flesh with ease.
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** StevenSeagal pokes fun at his countless [[InvincibleHero unstoppable badass]] role by playing a CompleteMonster villain... who is so badass that [[spoiler:he can only be killed by a self-administered sepukku]].
to:
** StevenSeagal pokes fun at his countless [[InvincibleHero unstoppable badass]] role by playing a CompleteMonster villain... who is so badass that [[spoiler:he can only be killed by a self-administered sepukku]].
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* KavorkaMan: Ladies ''love'' Machete.
** Considering the trailer insists "Machete gets the women," this [[YouCantFightFate was unavoidable]].
** Considering the trailer insists "Machete gets the women," this [[YouCantFightFate was unavoidable]].
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* KavorkaMan: Ladies ''love'' Machete.
**Machete. Considering the trailer insists "Machete gets the women," this [[YouCantFightFate was unavoidable]].
**
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* LatinoIsBrown: The red-headed kid in the Latino community has to explain that he's not Mexican, he just grew up in the neighborhood.
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It\'s not just about any Spanish character, but a very specific Zorro-like archetype.
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''Machete'' stars Danny Trejo as Machete, a mysterious [[BadassSpaniard Badass Mexican]] hired off the street to kill a [[strike:United States]] [[EverythingIsBigInTexas Texas]] state senator. However, before he can complete the mission, he is betrayed and left for dead by the same men who hired him. Now, eager for revenge, Machete sets out to take down the senator and everyone else who gets in his way.
to:
''Machete'' stars Danny Trejo as Machete, a mysterious [[BadassSpaniard Badass Mexican]] Mexican hired off the street to kill a [[strike:United States]] [[EverythingIsBigInTexas Texas]] state senator. However, before he can complete the mission, he is betrayed and left for dead by the same men who hired him. Now, eager for revenge, Machete sets out to take down the senator and everyone else who gets in his way.
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** MichelleRodriguez as an [[ExaggeratedTrope over-the-top version]] of her [[TypeCasting usual]] [[SpicyLatina sexy]], [[BadassSpaniard badass Latina]] roles. [[VasquezAlwaysDies Her death doesn't even merit a spoiler.]] [[spoiler: Her [[NotQuiteDead surviving and]] [[MetaCasting largely subverting her typecasting]] makes her reveal at the end serious, ultimate badass.]]
to:
** MichelleRodriguez as an [[ExaggeratedTrope over-the-top version]] of her [[TypeCasting usual]] [[SpicyLatina sexy]], [[BadassSpaniard badass Latina]] Latina roles. [[VasquezAlwaysDies Her death doesn't even merit a spoiler.]] [[spoiler: Her [[NotQuiteDead surviving and]] [[MetaCasting largely subverting her typecasting]] makes her reveal at the end serious, ultimate badass.]]
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* SpinOff: Of GrindHouse and SpyKids, though the latter's only connected by a character name and actor.
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* SpinOff: Of GrindHouse ''GrindHouse'' and SpyKids, ''SpyKids'', though the latter's only connected by a character name and actor.
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* TrenchcoatWarfare: Machete carries a ludicrous number of blades inside his trenchcoat.
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* PlayingAgainstType: StevenSeagal is the villain.
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* PlayingAgainstType: StevenSeagal is the villain.villain, in his first theatrical film in nearly a decade.
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misuse of renamed trope (Mundane Made Awesome)
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* WeaponizedCar: a whole fleet of these in the climax. Except that at some point they ran out of weapons and [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome put in hydraulics instead.]]
to:
* WeaponizedCar: a whole fleet of these in the climax. Except that at some point they ran out of weapons and [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome put in hydraulics instead.]]
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more precise trope
* SleazyPolitician[=/=]StrawHypocrite: Senator [=McLaughlin=], [[ExaggeratedTrope to the point of absurdity]]. [[CrowningMomentOfFunny When your political ads could have come straight from a GTA game]], it's kind of a given.
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* StrawmanPolitical[=/=]StrawHypocrite: Senator [=McLaughlin=], [[ExaggeratedTrope to the point of absurdity]].
** [[CrowningMomentOfFunny When your political ads could have come straight from a GTA game]], it's kind of a given.
** [[CrowningMomentOfFunny When your political ads could have come straight from a GTA game]], it's kind of a given.
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removed trope: Refuge In Cool, moved YMMV items
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* {{Awesome McCoolname}}: Machete is not actually his [[TheyCallHimSword nickname]], it's his ''birthname''.
to:
* {{Awesome McCoolname}}: Machete is not actually his [[TheyCallHimSword nickname]], it's his ''birthname''.''birth name''.
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* BadassBiker: Machete rides a chopper with ape hanger handlebars. Later he mounts a gatling gun to a bike.
to:
* BadassBiker: Machete rides a chopper with ape hanger handlebars. Later he mounts a gatling Gatling gun to a bike.
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** Booth is ironically the one who gave Machete the handphone ("Machete don't text") in the first place.
to:
** Booth is ironically the one who gave Machete the handphone hand-phone ("Machete don't text") in the first place.
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* FailedASpotCheck: When two Mooks defending Booth's mansion come across Machete, he bluffs his way past them by holding up a pickaxe and weedwhacker and saying "New gardener." One of the Mooks begins lecturing the other how [[NationalStereotypes everyone views illegals as common day-laborers and muses that any Mexican]] could just sneak past any security point by claiming to be a gardener... When the Mooks realize what they did, Machete's already got the [[ImprovisedWeapon weedwhacker revved up.]]
to:
* FailedASpotCheck: When two Mooks defending Booth's mansion come across Machete, he bluffs his way past them by holding up a pickaxe and weedwhacker and saying "New gardener." One of the Mooks begins lecturing the other how [[NationalStereotypes everyone views illegals as common day-laborers and muses that any Mexican]] could just sneak past any security point by claiming to be a gardener... When the Mooks realize what they did, Machete's already got the [[ImprovisedWeapon weedwhacker weed whacker revved up.]]
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* GatlingGood: Machete attaches a gatling gun to his motorcycle, then rides over an explosion from nowhere to shoot a mob of Mooks.
* GenreSavvy: The guards in black suits go through a [[ZigZaggingTrope zig-zagging version of the trope]]. At first, they are GenreBlind enough to let in a {{Badass}}-looking Mexican with [[ImprovisedWeapon sharp garden tools]], but quickly realize - and {{Lampshade}} - that they were suffering from PlotInducedStupidity. When Machete pays a second visit, they are GenreSavvy enough to surrender to him, understanding his role as the ActionHero and theirs as [[{{Mooks}} expendable goons]]. He's nice enough to let them live.
* GenreSavvy: The guards in black suits go through a [[ZigZaggingTrope zig-zagging version of the trope]]. At first, they are GenreBlind enough to let in a {{Badass}}-looking Mexican with [[ImprovisedWeapon sharp garden tools]], but quickly realize - and {{Lampshade}} - that they were suffering from PlotInducedStupidity. When Machete pays a second visit, they are GenreSavvy enough to surrender to him, understanding his role as the ActionHero and theirs as [[{{Mooks}} expendable goons]]. He's nice enough to let them live.
to:
* GatlingGood: Machete attaches a gatling Gatling gun to his motorcycle, then rides over an explosion from nowhere to shoot a mob of Mooks.
* GenreSavvy: The guards in black suits go through a [[ZigZaggingTropezig-zagging zigzagging version of the trope]]. At first, they are GenreBlind enough to let in a {{Badass}}-looking Mexican with [[ImprovisedWeapon sharp garden tools]], but quickly realize - and {{Lampshade}} - that they were suffering from PlotInducedStupidity. When Machete pays a second visit, they are GenreSavvy enough to surrender to him, understanding his role as the ActionHero and theirs as [[{{Mooks}} expendable goons]]. He's nice enough to let them live.
* GenreSavvy: The guards in black suits go through a [[ZigZaggingTrope
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* HotMom: April's mother definitly qualifies
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* HotMom: April's mother definitly definitely qualifies
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** [[FridgeBrilliance Luz says outright that "Shé" is now just an icon to the Mexicans.]]
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* KatanasAreJustBetter: Torres' weapon of choice. Leads to [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome a swordfight between katana-wielder and machete-wielder.]]
to:
* KatanasAreJustBetter: Torres' weapon of choice. Leads to [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome a swordfight sword fight between katana-wielder and machete-wielder.]]
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** One scene from the ''Grindhouse'' trailer that didn't make the real film is [[spoiler: the shot of Booth cowering behind armed guards while Machete launches himself with a gatling gun/motorcycle combo at them. Booth dies in another scene and isn't there when Machete goes all GatlingGood at the bad guys.]]
to:
** One scene from the ''Grindhouse'' trailer that didn't make the real film is [[spoiler: the shot of Booth cowering behind armed guards while Machete launches himself with a gatling Gatling gun/motorcycle combo at them. Booth dies in another scene and isn't there when Machete goes all GatlingGood at the bad guys.]]
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* OneSceneWonder: Cheech Marin has only a couple of minutes of screen time, but manages to steal every scene.
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* RefugeInCool, RefugeInAudacity, RuleOfCool: Take your pick.
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* RefugeInCool, RefugeInAudacity, RefugeInAudacity or RuleOfCool: Take your pick.
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* TheSavageSouth: insane Mexican mercenary runs amok in Texas.
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* TheSavageSouth: insane Insane Mexican mercenary runs amok in Texas.
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* [[OneSceneWonder Two Scene Wonder]]: The hilariously GenreSavvy guards.
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No censoring here, bud!
Changed line(s) 197 (click to see context) from:
** "You're telling me that Mexican day-laborer is a '''G*****N FEDERALE'''?!"
to:
** "You're telling me that Mexican day-laborer is a '''G*****N '''GODDAMN FEDERALE'''?!"
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Changed line(s) 197 (click to see context) from:
** "You're telling me that Mexican day-laborer is a '''GOD DAMN FEDERALE'''?!"
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** "You're telling me that Mexican day-laborer is a '''GOD DAMN '''G*****N FEDERALE'''?!"
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* ChekhovsLecture: At a safehouse hospital, a friendly doctor mentions how the human body has 60 feet of large intestines. Guess what Machete uses when he needs to make a quick exit out of that hospital's window?
to:
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* OneSceneWonder: Cheech Marin has only a couple of minutes of screen time, but manages to steal every scene.
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* PlayingAgainstType: StevenSeagal is the villain.
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* EvenEvilHasStandards: Subverted. When Von Jackson kills a pregnant woman, Senator Maclaughlin half-heartedly calls him out on it, then he kills the husband with the same sadistic pleasure.
to:
* EvenEvilHasStandards: Subverted. When Von Jackson kills a pregnant woman, Senator Maclaughlin [=MacLaughlin=] half-heartedly calls him out on it, then he kills the husband with the same sadistic pleasure.
* ExactWords: Machete tells Booth that April and June are with God. Booth assumes that they're dead, when they're actually in church.
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* EyepatchOfPower: [[spoiler: Luz]].
to:
* EyepatchOfPower: [[spoiler: Luz]].Luz.]]
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I Got Better sinkhole removed.
Changed line(s) 98 (click to see context) from:
* EyeScream: [[spoiler: Luz's fate. [[IGotBetter She gets better]].]]
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* EyeScream: [[spoiler: Luz's fate. [[IGotBetter She gets better]].better.]]
Changed line(s) 279 (click to see context) from:
* VasquezAlwaysDies: [[spoiler: Subverted. MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl of the trope, gets a bullet in the eye... but [[IGotBetter returns later]] in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. And to top it off, she survives after that as well. Of course, there's always the sequel(s) to play this trope straight.]]
to:
* VasquezAlwaysDies: [[spoiler: Subverted. MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl of the trope, gets a bullet in the eye... but [[IGotBetter returns later]] later in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. And to top it off, she survives after that as well. Of course, there's always the sequel(s) to play this trope straight.]]
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** "Welcome to America."
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* NeverTrustATrailer: while the film is mostly faithful to scenes filmed for the 'Original' trailer, some scenes from the ''real'' trailers don't appear in the final cut.
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* NeverTrustATrailer: while While the film is mostly faithful to scenes filmed for the 'Original' trailer, some scenes from the ''real'' trailers don't appear in the final cut.
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* TheNotSecret - Luz is She... whoda thunk?
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* TheNotSecret - Luz is She... whoda who'da thunk?
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** When [=MacLaughlin=] realizes the nun he's talking to is April.
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** [[spoiler:EvilFormerFriend]]
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Changed line(s) 281 (click to see context) from:
* VillainousBreakdown
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** [[spoiler:EvilFormerFriend]]
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*VillainousBreakdown
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*BlondeBrunetteRedhead: April, Luz and Rivera.
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* BigBrotherIsEmployingYou: Rivera.
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Changed line(s) 145 (click to see context) from:
* InspectorJavert: Rivera, at first.
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**Robert Rodriguez's nieces, doctor [[spoiler:and girlfriend Rose [=McGowan=] in a deleted scene]] [[{{Grindhouse}} are again in this movie]].
Deleted line(s) 205 (click to see context) :
* ProductionPosse: Robert Rodriguez's nieces, doctor [[spoiler:and girlfriend Rose [=McGowan=] in a deleted scene]] [[{{Grindhouse}} are again in this movie]].
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Changed line(s) 48 (click to see context) from:
* BigBrotherIsEmployingYou: Rivera.
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Changed line(s) 145 (click to see context) from:
* InspectorJavert: Rivera, at first.
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*ProductionPosse: Robert Rodriguez's nieces, doctor [[spoiler:and girlfriend Rose [=McGowan=] in a deleted scene]] [[{{Grindhouse}} are again in this movie]].
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*BigBrotherIsEmployingYou: Rivera.
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*InspectorJavert: Rivera, at first.
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*TheOtherDarrin: Many of the actors from the fake trailer got replaced.
Changed line(s) 220 (click to see context) from:
** Torres saying "puñeta" every time he shows up. It's, sadly, a practically untranslatable Spanish curse word(the closest it can be translated to is "jerking off" used as an exclamation or adjective), [[BilingualBonus but to any person familiar with Spanish, it's rolling-on-the-floor funny.]]
to:
** Torres saying "puñeta" every time he shows up. It's, sadly, a practically untranslatable Spanish curse word(the word (the closest it can be translated to is "jerking off" used as an exclamation or adjective), [[BilingualBonus but to any person familiar with Spanish, it's rolling-on-the-floor funny.]]
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* ExaggeratedTrope: Hoo boy. It would be easier to say that every trope listed is exaggerated to varying degrees, and some are driven BeyondTheImpossible.
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* ExaggeratedTrope: Hoo boy. It would be easier to say that every trope listed is exaggerated to varying degrees, and some are driven BeyondTheImpossible.SerialEscalation.
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->''They just fucked with the wrong Mexican.''
[[quoteright:199:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/machete_poster-1_1017.jpg]]
The story of ''Machete'' is an interesting one. It began when RobertRodriguez first met DannyTrejo on the set of ''{{Desperado}}''. He believed Trejo should have been a "Mexican Jean-Claude Van Damme or Charles Bronson" named Machete. Other projects got in the way, though, and ''Machete'' was put on the shelf. Rodriguez continued to use scenes he had planned for it in his other movies, and also introduced a [[LighterAndSofter significantly friendlier version]] of the character in ''SpyKids''.
In 2007, Rodriguez filmed parts of ''Machete'' for a fake trailer attached to the beginning of ''{{Grindhouse}}''. After making another [[{{Shorts}} children's film]], he revisited ''Machete'' and set about making it into an actual film. The final product includes [[AscendedMeme every scene from the fake trailer]], and gained massive popularity as the quintessential exploitation action flick parody of the 00's. It boasts an impressive cast, including DannyTrejo, StevenSeagal, RobertDeNiro, [[CheechAndChong Cheech Marin]], JessicaAlba, LindsayLohan, MichelleRodriguez, and more.
''Machete'' stars Danny Trejo as Machete, a mysterious [[BadassSpaniard Badass Mexican]] hired off the street to kill a [[strike:United States]] [[EverythingIsBigInTexas Texas]] state senator. However, before he can complete the mission, he is betrayed and left for dead by the same men who hired him. Now, eager for revenge, Machete sets out to take down the senator and everyone else who gets in his way.
Rodriguez has released that the script for the sequel has recently been finished. Trejo, Alba, and Lohan are all slated to return.
!!This film provides examples of:
* AboveTheInfluence: Machete, with a drunk Jessica Alba no less. [[spoiler:Mind you, it works out for him.]]
* AbsurdlySharpBlade: Machete's... machetes, and the scalpels he later uses.
* ActionGirl: Luz and Sartana. April in the end TookALevelInBadass.
* ActorAllusion: Torrez, played by StevenSeagal, describes Machete as "notoriously [[HardToKill hard to kill]]". Torrez also uses an aikido move on Machete during their final confrontation.
** [[RobertDeNiro Robert De Niro's]] line ''"It's showtime!"''
* AdamWesting: Lots and lots.
** StevenSeagal pokes fun at his countless [[InvincibleHero unstoppable badass]] role by playing a CompleteMonster villain... who is so badass that [[spoiler:he can only be killed by a self-administered sepukku]].
** LindsayLohan as a [[DrugsAreBad drug-addicted]], [[ReallyGetsAround slutty]] MafiaPrincess who likes to stream her naughty bits on the internet (willingly, this time) alongside her mother. And whose father makes some... unfortunate comments about her.
** MichelleRodriguez as an [[ExaggeratedTrope over-the-top version]] of her [[TypeCasting usual]] [[SpicyLatina sexy]], [[BadassSpaniard badass Latina]] roles. [[VasquezAlwaysDies Her death doesn't even merit a spoiler.]] [[spoiler: Her [[NotQuiteDead surviving and]] [[MetaCasting largely subverting her typecasting]] makes her reveal at the end serious, ultimate badass.]]
** Felix Sabates as essentially the same doctor he played in ''PlanetTerror'', and, in fact, who he actually is in real life: when Sabates isn't appearing Rodriguez' movies, he's the Rodriguez' family doctor.
** And, last but not the least, DannyTrejo! A HeyItsThatGuy for his entire career, [[TypeCasting typecast]] as "that creepy KnifeNut Mexican", he finally gets a leading role as the described character type.
* AllGirlsWantBadBoys: Yes. Yes they do. [[spoiler: And their moms too.]]
* AlmightyJanitor: Luz runs a food stand. Machete gets along as a laborer and poses as an actual janitor and a gardener later.
* {{Awesome McCoolname}}: Machete is not actually his [[TheyCallHimSword nickname]], it's his ''birthname''.
* ArsonMurderAndJaywalking: invoked when Sartana brings up Luz's "aiding illegal immigrants, evading border patrol and unsanitary food preparation".
* BadHabits - [[spoiler:April wears this for the final battle, shortly after she finds that her father had been killed.]]
* [[BadAss Badass]]: Considering it's an action movie directed by Robert Rodriguez, [[WorldOfBadass pretty much the entire cast]]. Especially Machete himself. One villain says he's "CIA, FBI, DEA, all rolled up into one mean fucking burrito."
** Each and every Mexican character.
* BadassBiker: Machete rides a chopper with ape hanger handlebars. Later he mounts a gatling gun to a bike.
* BadassGrandpa: Machete Cortez' birthday is listed as May 16, 1944... which is Danny Trejo's birthday, making him 66.
* BadassLongcoat: Machete wears a longcoat at the final battle. Full of [[MacheteMayhem machetes]]. OhCrap.
* BadassMustache: Just look at it. The padre has an awesome one as well.
* BadassPreacher: Played by Cheech Marin, too.
-->"I took a vow of ''peace''. And now you want me to help you ''kill'' all these men?"
-->"Yes, bro... I mean, padre."
-->(gives it some thought, then shrugs) "I'll see what I can do..."
** And, of course
-->"Please, Father, have mercy."
-->"God has mercy, [[BoomHeadShot I don't."]]
* BareYourMidriff: MichelleRodriguez does this; FanService indeed.
* BatmanColdOpen: The film opens three years earlier with Machete and a [[DeadPartner sidekick Federal]] chasing down a woman kidnapped by Torres. [[spoiler: Too bad [[ObviousTrap it's a trap]]!]]
* BeatPanel: A hilarious one from the guards:
--> [[LampshadeHanging You know, any Mexican comes in here with garden tools, we let him in.]] -beat- -beat- -OhCrap-
* {{BFS}}: Machete holds [[OneSceneWonder (but doesn't use)]] a machete as big as he is in the climax.
* BigBad: Torres. [[spoiler:Working with [=McLaughlin=], Von Johnson, and Booth.]]
* BlastingItOutOfTheirHands: [[spoiler:Born-again April, with ''[[ImprobableAimingSkills automatic weaponry]]''.]]
* BloodyHilarious: All over the place, but mostly ''the intestines.''
* BloodstainedGlassWindows: The showdown between Padre and Osiris.
* BroomstickQuarterstaff: Machete uses a mop to fight his way past Booth's goons after the faked assassination attempt on the senator.
* CarFu - Low-rider hydraulics have never been so lethal.
* CarMeetsHouse - Several times.
* CaughtOnTape - The villains commit so many criminal acts in front of video cameras that it borders on TooDumbToLive territory. Heck, a Texas state senator, during an election year, actually ''requests'' that someone videotape him committing murder and burn a bunch of copies of the DVD.
* ChekhovsGun:
** Booth is ironically the one who gave Machete the handphone ("Machete don't text") in the first place.
** Chekhov's Corkscrew: When Machete visits Luz's house, for a second, camera focuses on a corkscrew lying on the table. Later, when they are attacked, he uses it in combat.
* ChekhovsLecture: At a safehouse hospital, a friendly doctor mentions how the human body has 60 feet of large intestines. Guess what Machete uses when he needs to make a quick exit out of that hospital's window?
* CompletelyMissingThePoint[=/=][[DoesNotUnderstandSarcasm Does Not Understand Parody]]: A few "concerned" people thought this was a violent racist movie. Fortunately, the wank is [[http://www.movieguide.org/articles/1/931 hilarious.]] They didn't watch it, either, apparently, because, as below, [[spoiler:a Mexican is the real big bad.]]
* ContractOnTheHitman - The whole plot.
* CreatorProvincialism: The film is set in Austin, where Robert Rodriguez lives and his film studio is based.
* CrucifiedHeroShot: With surprising attention to detail. Most depictions that even ''use'' nails will have them driven into the palms; this movie accurately shows the nails being driven into the wrist-joints.
* DangerTakesABackSeat: [[spoiler:How Luz finishes off Von Jackson in the end.]]
** Machete uses this to bust himself out of the first arrest.
* [[DarkActionGirl Dark]] FauxActionGirl: Aside from shooting the naked woman (who also counts) who tricks Machete in the opening in the back of the head in her first scene, Cheryl Chin's character does ... pretty much nothing. [[spoiler: All she does when Torres dies is pout fetchingly.]]
* DeadlyDodging: Machete gets into, and ''out of'' a street fight, doing only this (it ends when the other guy breaks his own fist on scaffolding).
** While eating a taco!
** [[FridgeBrilliance Machete don't hit unarmed men.]]
* {{Defictionalization}}: It began its life as a fake trailer attached to ''{{Grindhouse}}''. Rodriguez was planning on making it a direct-to-DVD movie in the first place, however, but was eventually convinced to make it for theatrical release.
* DeletedScene: [[spoiler: How did Machete get out of Torres' death trap that opened the movie?]]
** See the [[WhatCouldHaveBeen what could have been]] trope below.
* {{Determinator}}: Machete has a bullet in his head and got shot in his shoulder. This won't stop him from [[BadAss kicking ass.]]
* DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything: How did Machete's hit on [=McLaughlin=] go tits up? [[WhoShotJFK A second gunman was involved.]]
** The nonfatal assassination itself has been to compared to the shooting of former Taiwan president Chen Shubian, complete with "magic bullet" accusations (it grazed his belly).
** Also, a political assassination involving a man named Booth? [[AbrahamLincoln Hmmmm...]]
** And it takes place in Texas (due to a mixture of CreatorProvincialism and, well, it's cheaper to shoot where your studio is). True, Austin, but still.
** The campaign adds comparing Mexican immigrants to vermin is similar to Jews being compared to rats in the Nazi propaganda film ''The Eternal Jew''.
** An American politician who lives in Texas and affects a Texan accent but isn't even from the South? Hmmmm.
* DoubleEntendre
-->"What's this ''long'', ''hard'' thing?"
-->"My machete."
* TheDragon: Booth, Jackson, and Torres each have one, [[DragonTheirFeet but neither seems particularly good at their job]].
* DualWielding: Machete with a pair of machetes vs. Torres with his katana and wakizashi.
** Sartana with her [[ImprovisedWeapon stiletto heels!]]
* DuelingMovies: Went up against TheExpendables for title of "Most Action-Packed Movie of 2010", and also the most [[RatedMForManly manliest]] movie of 2010. It grossed less (37 mil for TheExpendables, Machete got 10 mil - it was a slow movie weekend, apparently), but gained better critical reaction.
* {{Eagleland}}: Flavor 2 for all the bad guys, except Torres, who's Mexican. Sartana, the Mexicans, and a handful of LaResistance Caucasians are Flavor 1.
** Von Jackson and [=McLaughlin=] ''think'' they are Flavor 1, but their bullying and trigger-happy redneck cowboy ways make them Flavor 2. [[spoiler:Though [=McLaughlin=] seems to fall to Mixed Flavor -- right around the time he admits he's not even from Texas -- in the end.]]
* EasilyForgiven: [[spoiler:[=McLaughlin=] is pretty easily forgiven by the Network once Von and his man turn on him. April is not so forgiving, though.]]
* EpicFlail: made from [[MacGyvering a nurse's belt and some surgical knives.]] Do NOT try this at home.
* EthnicMenialLabor: You didn't suspect the movie will feature Hispanic laborers, did ya?
* EvenEvilHasStandards: Subverted. When Von Jackson kills a pregnant woman, Senator Maclaughlin half-heartedly calls him out on it, then he kills the husband with the same sadistic pleasure.
* EverythingIsBigInTexas - Including man-sized machetes.
* ExaggeratedTrope: Hoo boy. It would be easier to say that every trope listed is exaggerated to varying degrees, and some are driven BeyondTheImpossible.
* EyepatchOfPower: [[spoiler: Luz]].
* EyeScream: [[spoiler: Luz's fate. [[IGotBetter She gets better]].]]
** The fact that the character in question loses an eye at all is probably a reference to what happens to JohnnyDepp in ''OnceUponATimeInMexico'', from the same director.
** Sartana can do this with [[ImprovisedWeapon her stiletto heels.]]
* FailedASpotCheck: When two Mooks defending Booth's mansion come across Machete, he bluffs his way past them by holding up a pickaxe and weedwhacker and saying "New gardener." One of the Mooks begins lecturing the other how [[NationalStereotypes everyone views illegals as common day-laborers and muses that any Mexican]] could just sneak past any security point by claiming to be a gardener... When the Mooks realize what they did, Machete's already got the [[ImprovisedWeapon weedwhacker revved up.]]
* FalseFlagOperation: The bad guy's plot.
* {{Fanservice}}: Lessee. Gratuitous nudity about three minutes into the movie. [[FanDisservice Too bad girl in question gets blown away.]] You got [[spoiler: LindsayLohan (actually a body double, although she's pretty close herself later on) and her character's mother topless and making out with Machete in her daddy's swimming pool.]] There's also [[spoiler: JessicaAlba showing ''almost'' everything in a ShowerScene. Damn elbow placement!]] Oh, yeah, the guys (and some girls) will like.
** Also Michelle Rodriguez's combat uniform. (Hell, her standard clothes - Daisy Dukes and spaghetti-strapped tank top - also count.)
** Jessica Alba's nude scene was later revealed to not have been nude after all. She's wearing fairly covering panties and top, which were later removed digitally. But it's still ''Jessica Alba'', which for many is enough...
* FakeNationality: StevenSeagal as a katana-wielding Mexican drug lord? That could work...
** RobertRodriguez seems to have a fondness for this, as he acknowledged the on-purpose, over-the-top silliness of a spray-tanned Willem Dafoe playing a Mexican drug lord in the DVD commentary of ''OnceUponATimeInMexico''
** One of Luz's Network crew is an [[PrettyFlyForAWhiteGuy adopted white kid who was raised Mexican]].
** [[spoiler: Senator [=McLaughlin=] isn't actually from Texas. His southern accent is totally fake. His real voice is simply RobertDeNiro [[AdamWesting talking normally]]. This is probably a reference to the fact that George W. Bush is actually from Connecticut.]]
* FakingTheDead: [[spoiler: Luz, comes back from the dead wearing an eyepatch and donning her old role as [[LaResistance the rebel leader "Shé"]].]]
* FiveFiveFive; Pops up on Booth's phone. Also, 1-800-HITMAN has one too few numbers.
* ForeignCultureFetish: Torrez, apparently, down to using a katana and committing seppuku.
* GatlingGood: Machete attaches a gatling gun to his motorcycle, then rides over an explosion from nowhere to shoot a mob of Mooks.
* GenreSavvy: The guards in black suits go through a [[ZigZaggingTrope zig-zagging version of the trope]]. At first, they are GenreBlind enough to let in a {{Badass}}-looking Mexican with [[ImprovisedWeapon sharp garden tools]], but quickly realize - and {{Lampshade}} - that they were suffering from PlotInducedStupidity. When Machete pays a second visit, they are GenreSavvy enough to surrender to him, understanding his role as the ActionHero and theirs as [[{{Mooks}} expendable goons]]. He's nice enough to let them live.
* GeorgeLucasThrowback: To '70s exploitation/trash movies, especially in the vein of blaxploitation movies.
* GodivaHair: April, waking up in a church after having been fucked sensele... drugged by Machete. It doesn't always cover everything up.
* GoOutWithASmile: [[spoiler: [=McLaughlin=] after getting shot up by the remnants of Von Jackson's group when he is mistaken for a Mexican. He seems to enjoy the irony and gives a classic De Niro grin.]]
* {{Gorn}}: A Rio Grande of blood is spilled in the movie, with dozens of characters killed in gruesome ways. Like [[spoiler:bungee jumping... with intestines.]]
* TheGuardsMustBeCrazy: Played with. Booth's guards drop the ball by letting Machete in, thinking he's another day laborer and complaining about how people always fall for the simplest disguises, but almost instantly [[{{LampshadeHanging}} realize it.]]
* GunsAkimbo: With [[ShotgunsAreJustBetter shotguns]] no less!
* GratuitousSpanish: Lots of it.
* HandCannon - [[spoiler:April's]] S&W500 in the final battle.
** [[spoiler:Luz]]'s sawn-off - based on comments from IMFDB about the size of its barrels, it's ''6-gauge''.
* HeelRealization: One of Booth's {{Mooks}}. "Ive been watching the boss, and the boss is a real scumbag." That same Mook, when confronted by Machete shortly thereafter, promptly quits his job and gives Machete his gun.
* HonorBeforeReason: The entire reason Machete's in this situation.
* HospitalHottie: The twin nurses who help Machete out. They show up during the climax, dual-wielding guns to cut down racists.
* HotMom: April's mother definitly qualifies
* HypocriticalHumor:
** [[BigBad Booth]] has no problem using and abusing Mexicans, oh, and by the way, can you pass him another taco at lunchtime...?
** The evil scheme scheme: [[spoiler:Crooked politicians and drug runners want to seal up the border... to make it easier for them to import ''their'' illegal merchandise]].
** One Mexican corrects his fellow dishwasher's pronunciation of Spanish profanity... and then pronounces "Hey" wrong.
** The same character also supports the anti-immigration policy, as he's already on this side of the border. Also one of the mooks at Booth's house is Hungarian.
* ImpairmentShot: Machete as he is wheeled into an ER.
* IronicEcho:
** Not verbally, but Torres says to Machete that beheading him would be the honorable way to kill him, but Machete doesn't deserve to die honorably. [[spoiler:Torres later commits seppuku.]]
** The two guards bitching to the three hitmen Machete shoots during his escape from the assassination attempt.
--> "I thought Jango shot you..." "[[NeverSayThatAgain I don't want to hear that story ever again.]]"
** Booth says, "I'm sending you to a convent" to his daughter early in the film. She dons a habit before the film's climax.
** Von Jackson says "An eye for an eye" on shooting Luz. [[spoiler:She turns out to be NotQuiteDead, but the [[MoeGreeneSpecial bullet took out her eye]].]]
* TheIllegal: Major plot point.
* ImperialStormtrooperMarksmanshipAcademy: Every Mook suffers from this.
* ImprobableAimingSkills: Nearly every hero (and the top-tier [[BigBad Bad Guys]]) have this.
* ImprobableWeaponUser: Many of the {{Improvised Weapon}}s get rather outlandish. Machete uses a Grass String Trimmer as weapon on one of the goons. As the goon reaches for his gun, Machete repeatedly uses the trimmer on his fingers without hurting him badly.
* ImprovisedWeapon: TheMovie of the trope. Machete turns just about every prop within arms reach into a weapon. Booth is shown "disciplining" one of his {{Mooks}} with a USB cable. Sartana kills one man with a table ornament and another with her shoes.
* IncrediblyLamePun - Luz's alter-ego, "Shé". Pronounced like Che. You know, overused Communist icon.
** [[FridgeBrilliance Luz says outright that "Shé" is now just an icon to the Mexicans.]]
* JanitorImpersonationInfiltration: Machete shows up with [[PaperThinDisguise gardening tools]], and the guards just let him in.
** And, of course, he actually IS dressed as a janitor earlier in the movie to get to his sniper perch.
* KatanasAreJustBetter: Torres' weapon of choice. Leads to [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome a swordfight between katana-wielder and machete-wielder.]]
* KarmaHoudini:
** [[spoiler: Osiris, who disappears before the climax, due to his death scene getting left on the cutting room floor. Remnants of Von Jackon's vigilantes manage to escape and continue gunning down people they think are Mexicans. Torres' female sidekick just walks off.]]
** In a rare [[ZigzaggingTrope Triple Subversion]], [[spoiler: [=McLaughlin=]. First he looks like he's going to escape disguised as a Mexican [after helping the Mexicans, strangely enough], but then April shoots him. Then he turns out to have survived thanks to a bulletproof vest, and flees on foot. But then he gets killed by Von Jackson's men, mistaking him for a Mexican.]]
* KarmicDeath / HoistByHisOwnPetard: [[spoiler: [=McLaughlin=] - after putting on a Hispanic-looking outfit to escape the Big Final Shootout - is caught stumbling along the border fence by remnants of Von Jackson's army and shot down, falling into the electrified fence. [=McLaughlin=] even smiles as he dies, apparently appreciating the irony.]]
* KavorkaMan: Ladies ''love'' Machete.
** Considering the trailer insists "Machete gets the women," this [[YouCantFightFate was unavoidable]].
* KnifeNut: Machete and Torres. AND HOW!
* MadeOfPlasticine: At one point, Jessica Alba picks up a pyramid-shaped sculpture and rams it through a guy's chest.
* MacheteMayhem: A given. Machete later gets a ridiculously huge one in the final battle that disappears during the showdown with [[spoiler:Torres]].
* MafiaPrincess: April.
* MagicalSecurityCam: The playback of the taping of Von Jackson and [=McLaughlin=] shooting Mexicans attempting to cross the border simply replays the scene early in the film, complete with angle cuts.
* MajorInjuryUnderreaction: [[spoiler: Torres undersells getting impaled with a machete in a way only Steven Seagal can.]]
** [[spoiler: With the machete still sticking in him, Torres appears to attempt a ritual disemboweling: knowing he was already dead, he tries going out like a {{Samurai}} but fails, much to his Asian girlfriend's disgust.]]
* MaleGaze: Used several times, notably with Luz (by Machete) and a nurse (by [=McLaughlin=]) [=McLaughlin=] gets yelled at for it.
--> [[LampshadeHanging "I can feel your eyeballs reaching my uterus..."]]
* MaskedLuchador: One of the assassins attacking Machete and Sartana wears a Lucha mask [[spoiler:to conceal the fact the Feds are now after Sartana]].
* MayDecemberRomance: 29-year-old Jessica Alba and 66-year-old Danny Trejo.
* MeaningfulEcho: "If not us, then who?"
* MeaningfulName: Machete, Booth...
** Probably the most meaningful name in the entire movie is Luz, who is a beacon of hope for her people.
* MisfitMobilizationMoment: The "Network" mobilizes.
* ModestyBedsheet: Jessica Alba poses nude in front of a refrigerator with her arms positioned in just the right way to hide anything naughty (and in fact Alba was wearing normal underwear which was CGI'd out.
* MoeGreeneSpecial: [[spoiler: Luz. She survives it.]]
* MotherDaughterThreesome: Machete scores with June and April Booth at the same time. And sends the video to Papa Booth.
* MobileKiosk: Luz's taco van.
* NationalStereotypes: Plays with the Mexican stereotypes.
** The Mooks all seem to be Irish-American or Italian-American. Oh, and one [[TokenMinority Black]] [[BlackDudeDiesFirst guy]], whose death isn't shown.
* NeverTrustATrailer: while the film is mostly faithful to scenes filmed for the 'Original' trailer, some scenes from the ''real'' trailers don't appear in the final cut.
** One scene from the ''Grindhouse'' trailer that didn't make the real film is [[spoiler: the shot of Booth cowering behind armed guards while Machete launches himself with a gatling gun/motorcycle combo at them. Booth dies in another scene and isn't there when Machete goes all GatlingGood at the bad guys.]]
** There's also Machete's coat uncovered a '''lot''' of machetes strapped '''everywhere.''' In the film, he just uses two hilariously huge machetes in the final battle.
** The trailer originally had Machete taking aim at the senator as he coasted town the street in a convertible, full on JFK style.
* NoCelebritiesWereHarmed: [=McLaughlin=] is a far right-wing politician out of Texas, [[spoiler: [[GeorgeWBush who isn't even from Texas originally]].]]
* NonIndicativeName: Machete does most of his damage with Improvised Weapons. And one Weaponized Motorcycle.
* NoodleIncident: All those newspaper headlines that [[strike:Luz]] "She" was responsible for...
* NoOneShouldSurviveThat: [[spoiler: Luz]] was shot through the ''eye'' at not much more than point blank range, and except for the obvious loss of vision in that eye survives without lasting ill effects, even though such a wound (if survivable at all) would likely result in massive brain damage.
** Yeah, except it's MichelleRodriguez, so [[MemeticBadass it makes perfect sense]].
** The bullet could have lodged in her cheekbone. People have survived some really absurd gunshots in RealLife.
* NoPartyGiven: [=McLaughlin=] is referred to as an "independent" candidate. [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Texas_Senate#Current_composition On that basis alone, his odds of winning probably weren't too good.]] Indeed, Booth tells him he would never be reelected without him.
* TheNotSecret - Luz is She... whoda thunk?
* OffhandBackhand: Booth's {{dragon}} doesn't even look as he shoots [=McLaughlin=].
** He looks when he fires, it's just that he first turns the rifle towards [=McLaughlin=] while still looking/smirking at Machete.
* OffstageVillainy - Torres' drug operations have been... expanding.
* OffWithHisHead: Machete decapitates a lot of people, including five guys with a single stroke in the opening scene.
* OhCrap:
** "You're telling me that Mexican day-laborer is a '''GOD DAMN FEDERALE'''?!"
** Also, when Booth gets Machete's first-ever [[spoiler:text message.]]
** And when the bad guys' plan for immigration begins falling apart...
* OnlyAFleshWound
-->'''Machete:''' "I wasn't going to kill [=McLaughlin=]. I was only going to shoot him in the neck, to stop him from saying those stupid things."
* OohMeAccentsSlipping: Steven Seagal as Torres, which is almost certainly completely intentional. One hopes.
* PapaWolf: [[spoiler: Booth to his drug-troubled daughter April. It would be his redeeming quality, if it wasn't because he wants to bone her. At least he knows it's wrong, and has confessed it to a priest.]]
* ParentalIncest[=/=]VillainousIncest: Booth confesses to impure thoughts about April. Meanwhile, she's filming porn with her mother.
* ThePasswordIsAlwaysSwordfish: Invoked when [[spoiler: Machete]] hacks the encrypted files on [[spoiler: Booth's]] computer.
* ProductionPosse: Danny Trejo and Darryl Sabarra were both SpyKids directed by Rodriguez and Alba ended up in the next one.
* PlotHole: As with most other tropes in this film, deliberately used as a throwback to poorly cut and hastily shot grindhouse films that were rife with these.
* PsychoForHire: Osiris Amanpour (1-800-HITMAN)
* RagtagBunchOfMisfits: The Network. Also counts as LaResistance.
* RampJump: An incredibly {{egregious}} example at the climax of the movie: Machete mounts a [[GatlingGood minigun]] onto a [[CoolBike chopper]], and ramps off of a part of the scenery with a [[ImpressivePyrotechnics huge explosion]] behind him (with no apparent cause [[RuleOfCool other than]] [[AwesomenessIsVolatile it would be awesome]]), and cuts down a dozen mooks with gunfire before landing.
* RatedMForManly: The movie is a homage to the [[RoaringRampageOfRevenge avenging anti-hero]] movies of TheSeventies. So it's got everything - guns, [[MacheteMayhem machetes]], explosions, machetes, sexy women, [[OverlyLongGag machetes]], and tequila - that made such movies so manly. And ''thankfully'' without the awful disco soundtracks. Well, besides the scene with Lohan. Oh, we forgot to mention it's a {{Grindhouse}} spinoff.
* RealTrailerFakeMovie: ''Machete'' started out as one of these.
* RealitySubtext: LindsayLohan as a drugged-out amateur porn star who's trying to have a legit career? ''Awkwaaard.'' But hilarious.
* RecycledInSpace!: As of Comic Con 2011, the sequel Machete Kills Again has been retitled Machete Kills Again IN SPACE!
* RefugeInCool, RefugeInAudacity, RuleOfCool: Take your pick.
** [[SoBadItsGood Refuge In So Bad Its Good]]: every [[WhatHappenedToTheMouse plot hole]], SpecialEffectsFailure, awful delivery, [[FlatCharacter poorly defined character]] and ConspicuousCG only make it a better homage to the schlock that codified these tropes.
* RetiredBadass: Played straight with Padre. [[spoiler:Heavily implied with Luz.]]
--> "I don't kill anymore." "You don't kill any ''less'', either."
* RightManInTheWrongPlace: The plot gets kicked off when Machete's framed for assassination of a racist senator - Booth has no idea he just hired the wrong Mexican.
* RightWingMilitiaFanatic: Von Jackson and his border vigilantes.
* RoaringRampageOfRevenge: They DID, after all, just fuck with the wrong Mexican...
* RousingSpeech: given by [[spoiler: Sartana]] to the Mexican workers, and it's appropriately cheesy.
* RuleOfFun: Robert [=DeNiro's=] reason for being here.
* RunningGag : Von Jackson's [[TheDragon dragon]] throwing up after witnessing something violent. [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] by Von Jackson himself.
-->"You need to work on that."
** Torres saying "puñeta" every time he shows up. It's, sadly, a practically untranslatable Spanish curse word(the closest it can be translated to is "jerking off" used as an exclamation or adjective), [[BilingualBonus but to any person familiar with Spanish, it's rolling-on-the-floor funny.]]
* TheSavageSouth: insane Mexican mercenary runs amok in Texas.
* [[ScrewTheRulesImDoingWhatsRight Screw The Rules, I'm Doing What's Right]]: When Sartana gets pulled off the case, she decides to deliver all the evidence she has acquired from Machete to a news reporter.
-->"Well, [[ToBeLawfulOrGood there's the law and there's what's right]]. [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome I'm gonna do what's right]]."
* ScrewThisImOuttaHere: Upon encountering Machete ''again'' after getting getting shot in the legs during Machete's escape from the framing, a mook [[KnowWhenToFoldEm immediately quits angrily.]]
* SequelHook: [[spoiler: "Machete... Will Return in... ''Machete Kills!'' And... ''Machete Kills Again!''"]]
* TheSiege: The climax of the film. Rather appropriately, given the film's pro-immigration themes, the heroes are the ones trying to break into the fort.
* SirNotAppearingInThisTrailer: Jeff Fahey was barely in the trialer and did not appear on a lot of promotional material, despite having more screen time than De Niro and Seagal.
* ShoutOut:
** In the original ''Grindhouse'' trailer, Machete is seen inspecting a table full of weapons while JohnCarpenter's synthesizer score from ''EscapeFromNewYork'' plays, imitating a scene from that film.
** And the wide shot of the four bad guys walking into the church seems to echo the [=DiVAS=] entering the church in ''KillBill''
** [[spoiler:Luz]] in an eyepatch and stepping out of an ambulance covered in leather could homages Elle Driver and/or Snake Plissken.
** Padre [[spoiler:getting shot quite badly in the knee in the church]] echoes Marquez's injuries in ''OnceUponATimeInMexico''
** And the BloodyHilarious intestines...thing seems to echo El and Carolina's hotel escape in ''OnceUponATimeInMexico'', except that was a chain.
** A gunfight against mob enforcers in a church while Ave Maria plays in the background is a reference to JohnWoo films.
** Don't forget where the name {{Sartana}} comes from.
** Senator [=McLaughlin=] (played by Robert [=DeNiro=]) drives to the Vigilantes' compound in a... [[TaxiDriver taxi]].
** Another ShoutOut to ''OnceUponATimeInMexico:'' The shadowy freedom fighter is called "She". El Mariachi is also known as simply "El," which is Spanish for "He" (or possibly "the").
* ShroudedInMyth: "She," as well as Machete by the end.
* ShutUpHannibal: A rare example by a villain. Booth delivers his HannibalLecture to [=McLaughlin=] about how much the senator needs him, and [=McLaughlin=] responds by shooting him.
* SoundtrackDissonance: The use of Ave Maria and Vicente Fernandez's "El Rey" during scenes of slaughter.
* SouthOfTheBorder: Parodied.
* SpicyLatina: Not just MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl for this trope but also JessicaAlba who rarely plays this role, as well as several more. The nude woman in the opening scene also counts.
* SpinOff: Of GrindHouse and SpyKids, though the latter's only connected by a character name and actor.
* SplitScreen: Fight scene at Jessica Alba's house.
* SpoilerOpening: You'll notice a difference between Luz in the opening credits and Luz in the movie. [[spoiler:The one in the credits has an eyepatch...]]
* StevenUlyssesPerhero: During one scene, Machete is listed as the character's ''birth name''.
* StrawmanPolitical[=/=]StrawHypocrite: Senator [=McLaughlin=], [[ExaggeratedTrope to the point of absurdity]].
** [[CrowningMomentOfFunny When your political ads could have come straight from a GTA game]], it's kind of a given.
* TheStoic: Machete. Even when faced with the prospect of getting laid. And in the middle of sex.
* StylisticSuck - This being a {{Grindhouse}} spinoff and parody... you can tell Rodriguez was aiming to fill the movie to the brim with cheesy special effects and intentional FridgeLogic. For example, a lot of the effects are obviously intentionally half-assed or done wrong.
* TakeThat: A ''Cinco De Mayo''-themed trailer was issued with "A [[http://popwatch.ew.com/2010/05/05/machete-trailer-lohan/ special message]]... to ARIZONA!" In response to an anti-illegal-immigrant law (SB 1070) that had just passed in that state.
* TakingYouWithMe: [[spoiler: Torres]] considers this as he's dying...
-->''"...But you'll probably be in Hell waiting for me."''
* TechnicalPacifist: Machete, believe it or not. Sure, he kills ''a lot'' of people, but he goes out of his way to take out a lot through nonlethal means. Note the group of {{Mooks}} who live to encounter him a second time - only to survive again.
* ThemeNaming: April and June.
* ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill: Such as lowriders smashing people or strangling people with someone elses' guts.
* [[TheyCallHimSword They Call Him Machete]]: [[HisNameReallyIsBarkeep That's also his real first name]].
* ThirdPersonPerson: Machete sometimes refers to himself as this. "Machete don't text. Machete improvises."
* ThoseTwoGuys: Booth's security guards and the two dishwashers.
* ThrowItIn: Apparently the awesome line "Machete don't text" arose from a real-life communication between DannyTrejo and RobertRodriguez
* [[ThrowingYourSwordAlwaysWorks Throwing Your Machete Always Works]]: In this movie, ''it does.''
* TisOnlyABulletInTheBrain: Machete and Luz both survive a bullet in the brain unscathed (well... minus an eye in Luz's case but it doesn't seem to cause her much trouble.)
** Machete actually survived two. The first bullet saved his life by stopping the second bullet's advance.
* TrailersAlwaysSpoil: Anyone who's seen the trailer (or even just the opening credits) will know that Luz survives losing her eye and gets a patch.
** She also appears with the eyepatch on the cover of the DVD.
* {{Troperrific}}: No exploitation movie trope was left untouched!
* TwoPersonPoolParty: ...or Three Person in this case, as Machete scores with mother/daughter pair June and April Booth.
* [[OneSceneWonder Two Scene Wonder]]: The hilariously GenreSavvy guards.
* UglyGuyHotWife: Perhaps not ugly, but Machete is definitely scarred and craggy-looking. And both his wife (for the half-minute she was alive on-film) and Sartana are considerably easier on the eyes.
* TheUnreveal: The fate of Machete's daughter. Torres claims in the opening sequence that he'll kill Machete's daughter but we never find out if he did. A later scene implies that Luz is Machete's daughter but we never find out if that's true either.
* VasquezAlwaysDies: [[spoiler: Subverted. MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl of the trope, gets a bullet in the eye... but [[IGotBetter returns later]] in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. And to top it off, she survives after that as well. Of course, there's always the sequel(s) to play this trope straight.]]
* TheVerse: Apparently, takes place in the same universe as ''SpyKids'', albeit a ''much'' DarkerAndEdgier version of it.
** If this is true, then Sartana has another twin sister (see WhatCouldHaveBeen) who's married and a spy...
* VictoriasSecretCompartment: This might be an example, or it might not be, but the nude woman in the opening scene eventually withdraws a phone from Victoria's OTHER Secret Compartment. In other words, someplace you really, really [[CountryMatters shouldn't keep a phone]].
* TheVoiceless: One Mexican only communicates with a sketchpad.
* WeaponizedCar: a whole fleet of these in the climax. Except that at some point they ran out of weapons and [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome put in hydraulics instead.]]
* WhatCouldHaveBeen:
** The deleted scenes contain several. Sartana had a slutty twin sister constantly whacked out on Ny Quil that also lived with her, and they also greatly disliked each other - [[spoiler: she is later murdered by one of Osiris' partners who also didn't make it into the film, followed up by a scene of Sartana finding her body and showing she really did care about her]]; Osiris had another female partner named Boots [=McCoy=] (complete with her own title card introduction), who seemed to be quite crazy [[spoiler: originally she was the one to shoot Luz in the eye (by using a live cat as a silencer no less) instead of Von Jackson, and she also kills Sartana's twin sister by slitting her throat with a razor blade in her mouth]]; Osiris' fate, detailed below; Sartana questions Senator [=McLaughlin=] and Booth in the hospital about the assassination attempt; and scene of the Senator being interviewed by the latina reporter at the station. There's always Machete Kills...
** Chris Cooper was the first choice for the Senator [=McLaughlin role=]. He turned it down as he thought the script was too weird.
* WhatHappenedToTheMouse: [[CareerKillers Osiris]] disappears before the climax, without getting killed or finishing his job. In one of his later scenes, he notes that Machete isn't looking for ''him'', implying that he simply quit. He was originally supposed to get caught scoping out the chop shop and get decapitated by a power saw, but the scene was deleted.
* WhenAllYouHaveIsAHammer: the white kid's buddy is an artist who draws perfect portraits of Sartana and Machete. What does he do in the final fight, when the nurses, Wrench Wenches and dishwashers are all packing heat? Just... run around sketching like mad, apparently.
* WilhelmScream: One of the border vigilantes emits one in the climax before [[CarFu being squashed by a hydraulics-hopping lowrider]].
* WorldOfBadass: It can be simply said that the entire cast lives and breathes badassery.
* WorldOfHam: Machete ''is'' the page summary for this trope.
* WouldNotShootAGoodGuy: Machete spares the lives of Booth's guards, who only had an extremely vague clue as to what their boss was getting up to. Also, when he is "arrested" by phony cops, he waits until he hears them admit that they're fake before killing them.
* WriterOnBoard: Played for laughs and invoked. Rodriguez does, apparently, mean the film's pro-immigration stance sincerely, but he also portrays the conflict as not even really about race, but about money, with a Mexican drug lord as one of the main villains, and turns up the {{narm}} and {{anvilicious}}ness up, since it ''is'' meant to be a throwback to stupid race exploitation films.
* YouHaveFailedMe: Torres, Booth, [=McLaughlin=], and Von Jackson don't like it when their underlings make too many mistakes. [[spoiler: They even start turning on ''each other'' when their more monstrous actions go public, Booth getting killed and Von Jackson about to execute [=McLaughlin=].]]
* YouHaveOutlivedYourUsefulness - [[spoiler:All the bad guys to each other when Machete ruins their plans, ''again'']]
* YouKilledMyFather: Textbook example when [[spoiler:April shows up in the end to shoot [=McLaughlin=].]]
----
[[quoteright:199:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/machete_poster-1_1017.jpg]]
The story of ''Machete'' is an interesting one. It began when RobertRodriguez first met DannyTrejo on the set of ''{{Desperado}}''. He believed Trejo should have been a "Mexican Jean-Claude Van Damme or Charles Bronson" named Machete. Other projects got in the way, though, and ''Machete'' was put on the shelf. Rodriguez continued to use scenes he had planned for it in his other movies, and also introduced a [[LighterAndSofter significantly friendlier version]] of the character in ''SpyKids''.
In 2007, Rodriguez filmed parts of ''Machete'' for a fake trailer attached to the beginning of ''{{Grindhouse}}''. After making another [[{{Shorts}} children's film]], he revisited ''Machete'' and set about making it into an actual film. The final product includes [[AscendedMeme every scene from the fake trailer]], and gained massive popularity as the quintessential exploitation action flick parody of the 00's. It boasts an impressive cast, including DannyTrejo, StevenSeagal, RobertDeNiro, [[CheechAndChong Cheech Marin]], JessicaAlba, LindsayLohan, MichelleRodriguez, and more.
''Machete'' stars Danny Trejo as Machete, a mysterious [[BadassSpaniard Badass Mexican]] hired off the street to kill a [[strike:United States]] [[EverythingIsBigInTexas Texas]] state senator. However, before he can complete the mission, he is betrayed and left for dead by the same men who hired him. Now, eager for revenge, Machete sets out to take down the senator and everyone else who gets in his way.
Rodriguez has released that the script for the sequel has recently been finished. Trejo, Alba, and Lohan are all slated to return.
!!This film provides examples of:
* AboveTheInfluence: Machete, with a drunk Jessica Alba no less. [[spoiler:Mind you, it works out for him.]]
* AbsurdlySharpBlade: Machete's... machetes, and the scalpels he later uses.
* ActionGirl: Luz and Sartana. April in the end TookALevelInBadass.
* ActorAllusion: Torrez, played by StevenSeagal, describes Machete as "notoriously [[HardToKill hard to kill]]". Torrez also uses an aikido move on Machete during their final confrontation.
** [[RobertDeNiro Robert De Niro's]] line ''"It's showtime!"''
* AdamWesting: Lots and lots.
** StevenSeagal pokes fun at his countless [[InvincibleHero unstoppable badass]] role by playing a CompleteMonster villain... who is so badass that [[spoiler:he can only be killed by a self-administered sepukku]].
** LindsayLohan as a [[DrugsAreBad drug-addicted]], [[ReallyGetsAround slutty]] MafiaPrincess who likes to stream her naughty bits on the internet (willingly, this time) alongside her mother. And whose father makes some... unfortunate comments about her.
** MichelleRodriguez as an [[ExaggeratedTrope over-the-top version]] of her [[TypeCasting usual]] [[SpicyLatina sexy]], [[BadassSpaniard badass Latina]] roles. [[VasquezAlwaysDies Her death doesn't even merit a spoiler.]] [[spoiler: Her [[NotQuiteDead surviving and]] [[MetaCasting largely subverting her typecasting]] makes her reveal at the end serious, ultimate badass.]]
** Felix Sabates as essentially the same doctor he played in ''PlanetTerror'', and, in fact, who he actually is in real life: when Sabates isn't appearing Rodriguez' movies, he's the Rodriguez' family doctor.
** And, last but not the least, DannyTrejo! A HeyItsThatGuy for his entire career, [[TypeCasting typecast]] as "that creepy KnifeNut Mexican", he finally gets a leading role as the described character type.
* AllGirlsWantBadBoys: Yes. Yes they do. [[spoiler: And their moms too.]]
* AlmightyJanitor: Luz runs a food stand. Machete gets along as a laborer and poses as an actual janitor and a gardener later.
* {{Awesome McCoolname}}: Machete is not actually his [[TheyCallHimSword nickname]], it's his ''birthname''.
* ArsonMurderAndJaywalking: invoked when Sartana brings up Luz's "aiding illegal immigrants, evading border patrol and unsanitary food preparation".
* BadHabits - [[spoiler:April wears this for the final battle, shortly after she finds that her father had been killed.]]
* [[BadAss Badass]]: Considering it's an action movie directed by Robert Rodriguez, [[WorldOfBadass pretty much the entire cast]]. Especially Machete himself. One villain says he's "CIA, FBI, DEA, all rolled up into one mean fucking burrito."
** Each and every Mexican character.
* BadassBiker: Machete rides a chopper with ape hanger handlebars. Later he mounts a gatling gun to a bike.
* BadassGrandpa: Machete Cortez' birthday is listed as May 16, 1944... which is Danny Trejo's birthday, making him 66.
* BadassLongcoat: Machete wears a longcoat at the final battle. Full of [[MacheteMayhem machetes]]. OhCrap.
* BadassMustache: Just look at it. The padre has an awesome one as well.
* BadassPreacher: Played by Cheech Marin, too.
-->"I took a vow of ''peace''. And now you want me to help you ''kill'' all these men?"
-->"Yes, bro... I mean, padre."
-->(gives it some thought, then shrugs) "I'll see what I can do..."
** And, of course
-->"Please, Father, have mercy."
-->"God has mercy, [[BoomHeadShot I don't."]]
* BareYourMidriff: MichelleRodriguez does this; FanService indeed.
* BatmanColdOpen: The film opens three years earlier with Machete and a [[DeadPartner sidekick Federal]] chasing down a woman kidnapped by Torres. [[spoiler: Too bad [[ObviousTrap it's a trap]]!]]
* BeatPanel: A hilarious one from the guards:
--> [[LampshadeHanging You know, any Mexican comes in here with garden tools, we let him in.]] -beat- -beat- -OhCrap-
* {{BFS}}: Machete holds [[OneSceneWonder (but doesn't use)]] a machete as big as he is in the climax.
* BigBad: Torres. [[spoiler:Working with [=McLaughlin=], Von Johnson, and Booth.]]
* BlastingItOutOfTheirHands: [[spoiler:Born-again April, with ''[[ImprobableAimingSkills automatic weaponry]]''.]]
* BloodyHilarious: All over the place, but mostly ''the intestines.''
* BloodstainedGlassWindows: The showdown between Padre and Osiris.
* BroomstickQuarterstaff: Machete uses a mop to fight his way past Booth's goons after the faked assassination attempt on the senator.
* CarFu - Low-rider hydraulics have never been so lethal.
* CarMeetsHouse - Several times.
* CaughtOnTape - The villains commit so many criminal acts in front of video cameras that it borders on TooDumbToLive territory. Heck, a Texas state senator, during an election year, actually ''requests'' that someone videotape him committing murder and burn a bunch of copies of the DVD.
* ChekhovsGun:
** Booth is ironically the one who gave Machete the handphone ("Machete don't text") in the first place.
** Chekhov's Corkscrew: When Machete visits Luz's house, for a second, camera focuses on a corkscrew lying on the table. Later, when they are attacked, he uses it in combat.
* ChekhovsLecture: At a safehouse hospital, a friendly doctor mentions how the human body has 60 feet of large intestines. Guess what Machete uses when he needs to make a quick exit out of that hospital's window?
* CompletelyMissingThePoint[=/=][[DoesNotUnderstandSarcasm Does Not Understand Parody]]: A few "concerned" people thought this was a violent racist movie. Fortunately, the wank is [[http://www.movieguide.org/articles/1/931 hilarious.]] They didn't watch it, either, apparently, because, as below, [[spoiler:a Mexican is the real big bad.]]
* ContractOnTheHitman - The whole plot.
* CreatorProvincialism: The film is set in Austin, where Robert Rodriguez lives and his film studio is based.
* CrucifiedHeroShot: With surprising attention to detail. Most depictions that even ''use'' nails will have them driven into the palms; this movie accurately shows the nails being driven into the wrist-joints.
* DangerTakesABackSeat: [[spoiler:How Luz finishes off Von Jackson in the end.]]
** Machete uses this to bust himself out of the first arrest.
* [[DarkActionGirl Dark]] FauxActionGirl: Aside from shooting the naked woman (who also counts) who tricks Machete in the opening in the back of the head in her first scene, Cheryl Chin's character does ... pretty much nothing. [[spoiler: All she does when Torres dies is pout fetchingly.]]
* DeadlyDodging: Machete gets into, and ''out of'' a street fight, doing only this (it ends when the other guy breaks his own fist on scaffolding).
** While eating a taco!
** [[FridgeBrilliance Machete don't hit unarmed men.]]
* {{Defictionalization}}: It began its life as a fake trailer attached to ''{{Grindhouse}}''. Rodriguez was planning on making it a direct-to-DVD movie in the first place, however, but was eventually convinced to make it for theatrical release.
* DeletedScene: [[spoiler: How did Machete get out of Torres' death trap that opened the movie?]]
** See the [[WhatCouldHaveBeen what could have been]] trope below.
* {{Determinator}}: Machete has a bullet in his head and got shot in his shoulder. This won't stop him from [[BadAss kicking ass.]]
* DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything: How did Machete's hit on [=McLaughlin=] go tits up? [[WhoShotJFK A second gunman was involved.]]
** The nonfatal assassination itself has been to compared to the shooting of former Taiwan president Chen Shubian, complete with "magic bullet" accusations (it grazed his belly).
** Also, a political assassination involving a man named Booth? [[AbrahamLincoln Hmmmm...]]
** And it takes place in Texas (due to a mixture of CreatorProvincialism and, well, it's cheaper to shoot where your studio is). True, Austin, but still.
** The campaign adds comparing Mexican immigrants to vermin is similar to Jews being compared to rats in the Nazi propaganda film ''The Eternal Jew''.
** An American politician who lives in Texas and affects a Texan accent but isn't even from the South? Hmmmm.
* DoubleEntendre
-->"What's this ''long'', ''hard'' thing?"
-->"My machete."
* TheDragon: Booth, Jackson, and Torres each have one, [[DragonTheirFeet but neither seems particularly good at their job]].
* DualWielding: Machete with a pair of machetes vs. Torres with his katana and wakizashi.
** Sartana with her [[ImprovisedWeapon stiletto heels!]]
* DuelingMovies: Went up against TheExpendables for title of "Most Action-Packed Movie of 2010", and also the most [[RatedMForManly manliest]] movie of 2010. It grossed less (37 mil for TheExpendables, Machete got 10 mil - it was a slow movie weekend, apparently), but gained better critical reaction.
* {{Eagleland}}: Flavor 2 for all the bad guys, except Torres, who's Mexican. Sartana, the Mexicans, and a handful of LaResistance Caucasians are Flavor 1.
** Von Jackson and [=McLaughlin=] ''think'' they are Flavor 1, but their bullying and trigger-happy redneck cowboy ways make them Flavor 2. [[spoiler:Though [=McLaughlin=] seems to fall to Mixed Flavor -- right around the time he admits he's not even from Texas -- in the end.]]
* EasilyForgiven: [[spoiler:[=McLaughlin=] is pretty easily forgiven by the Network once Von and his man turn on him. April is not so forgiving, though.]]
* EpicFlail: made from [[MacGyvering a nurse's belt and some surgical knives.]] Do NOT try this at home.
* EthnicMenialLabor: You didn't suspect the movie will feature Hispanic laborers, did ya?
* EvenEvilHasStandards: Subverted. When Von Jackson kills a pregnant woman, Senator Maclaughlin half-heartedly calls him out on it, then he kills the husband with the same sadistic pleasure.
* EverythingIsBigInTexas - Including man-sized machetes.
* ExaggeratedTrope: Hoo boy. It would be easier to say that every trope listed is exaggerated to varying degrees, and some are driven BeyondTheImpossible.
* EyepatchOfPower: [[spoiler: Luz]].
* EyeScream: [[spoiler: Luz's fate. [[IGotBetter She gets better]].]]
** The fact that the character in question loses an eye at all is probably a reference to what happens to JohnnyDepp in ''OnceUponATimeInMexico'', from the same director.
** Sartana can do this with [[ImprovisedWeapon her stiletto heels.]]
* FailedASpotCheck: When two Mooks defending Booth's mansion come across Machete, he bluffs his way past them by holding up a pickaxe and weedwhacker and saying "New gardener." One of the Mooks begins lecturing the other how [[NationalStereotypes everyone views illegals as common day-laborers and muses that any Mexican]] could just sneak past any security point by claiming to be a gardener... When the Mooks realize what they did, Machete's already got the [[ImprovisedWeapon weedwhacker revved up.]]
* FalseFlagOperation: The bad guy's plot.
* {{Fanservice}}: Lessee. Gratuitous nudity about three minutes into the movie. [[FanDisservice Too bad girl in question gets blown away.]] You got [[spoiler: LindsayLohan (actually a body double, although she's pretty close herself later on) and her character's mother topless and making out with Machete in her daddy's swimming pool.]] There's also [[spoiler: JessicaAlba showing ''almost'' everything in a ShowerScene. Damn elbow placement!]] Oh, yeah, the guys (and some girls) will like.
** Also Michelle Rodriguez's combat uniform. (Hell, her standard clothes - Daisy Dukes and spaghetti-strapped tank top - also count.)
** Jessica Alba's nude scene was later revealed to not have been nude after all. She's wearing fairly covering panties and top, which were later removed digitally. But it's still ''Jessica Alba'', which for many is enough...
* FakeNationality: StevenSeagal as a katana-wielding Mexican drug lord? That could work...
** RobertRodriguez seems to have a fondness for this, as he acknowledged the on-purpose, over-the-top silliness of a spray-tanned Willem Dafoe playing a Mexican drug lord in the DVD commentary of ''OnceUponATimeInMexico''
** One of Luz's Network crew is an [[PrettyFlyForAWhiteGuy adopted white kid who was raised Mexican]].
** [[spoiler: Senator [=McLaughlin=] isn't actually from Texas. His southern accent is totally fake. His real voice is simply RobertDeNiro [[AdamWesting talking normally]]. This is probably a reference to the fact that George W. Bush is actually from Connecticut.]]
* FakingTheDead: [[spoiler: Luz, comes back from the dead wearing an eyepatch and donning her old role as [[LaResistance the rebel leader "Shé"]].]]
* FiveFiveFive; Pops up on Booth's phone. Also, 1-800-HITMAN has one too few numbers.
* ForeignCultureFetish: Torrez, apparently, down to using a katana and committing seppuku.
* GatlingGood: Machete attaches a gatling gun to his motorcycle, then rides over an explosion from nowhere to shoot a mob of Mooks.
* GenreSavvy: The guards in black suits go through a [[ZigZaggingTrope zig-zagging version of the trope]]. At first, they are GenreBlind enough to let in a {{Badass}}-looking Mexican with [[ImprovisedWeapon sharp garden tools]], but quickly realize - and {{Lampshade}} - that they were suffering from PlotInducedStupidity. When Machete pays a second visit, they are GenreSavvy enough to surrender to him, understanding his role as the ActionHero and theirs as [[{{Mooks}} expendable goons]]. He's nice enough to let them live.
* GeorgeLucasThrowback: To '70s exploitation/trash movies, especially in the vein of blaxploitation movies.
* GodivaHair: April, waking up in a church after having been fucked sensele... drugged by Machete. It doesn't always cover everything up.
* GoOutWithASmile: [[spoiler: [=McLaughlin=] after getting shot up by the remnants of Von Jackson's group when he is mistaken for a Mexican. He seems to enjoy the irony and gives a classic De Niro grin.]]
* {{Gorn}}: A Rio Grande of blood is spilled in the movie, with dozens of characters killed in gruesome ways. Like [[spoiler:bungee jumping... with intestines.]]
* TheGuardsMustBeCrazy: Played with. Booth's guards drop the ball by letting Machete in, thinking he's another day laborer and complaining about how people always fall for the simplest disguises, but almost instantly [[{{LampshadeHanging}} realize it.]]
* GunsAkimbo: With [[ShotgunsAreJustBetter shotguns]] no less!
* GratuitousSpanish: Lots of it.
* HandCannon - [[spoiler:April's]] S&W500 in the final battle.
** [[spoiler:Luz]]'s sawn-off - based on comments from IMFDB about the size of its barrels, it's ''6-gauge''.
* HeelRealization: One of Booth's {{Mooks}}. "Ive been watching the boss, and the boss is a real scumbag." That same Mook, when confronted by Machete shortly thereafter, promptly quits his job and gives Machete his gun.
* HonorBeforeReason: The entire reason Machete's in this situation.
* HospitalHottie: The twin nurses who help Machete out. They show up during the climax, dual-wielding guns to cut down racists.
* HotMom: April's mother definitly qualifies
* HypocriticalHumor:
** [[BigBad Booth]] has no problem using and abusing Mexicans, oh, and by the way, can you pass him another taco at lunchtime...?
** The evil scheme scheme: [[spoiler:Crooked politicians and drug runners want to seal up the border... to make it easier for them to import ''their'' illegal merchandise]].
** One Mexican corrects his fellow dishwasher's pronunciation of Spanish profanity... and then pronounces "Hey" wrong.
** The same character also supports the anti-immigration policy, as he's already on this side of the border. Also one of the mooks at Booth's house is Hungarian.
* ImpairmentShot: Machete as he is wheeled into an ER.
* IronicEcho:
** Not verbally, but Torres says to Machete that beheading him would be the honorable way to kill him, but Machete doesn't deserve to die honorably. [[spoiler:Torres later commits seppuku.]]
** The two guards bitching to the three hitmen Machete shoots during his escape from the assassination attempt.
--> "I thought Jango shot you..." "[[NeverSayThatAgain I don't want to hear that story ever again.]]"
** Booth says, "I'm sending you to a convent" to his daughter early in the film. She dons a habit before the film's climax.
** Von Jackson says "An eye for an eye" on shooting Luz. [[spoiler:She turns out to be NotQuiteDead, but the [[MoeGreeneSpecial bullet took out her eye]].]]
* TheIllegal: Major plot point.
* ImperialStormtrooperMarksmanshipAcademy: Every Mook suffers from this.
* ImprobableAimingSkills: Nearly every hero (and the top-tier [[BigBad Bad Guys]]) have this.
* ImprobableWeaponUser: Many of the {{Improvised Weapon}}s get rather outlandish. Machete uses a Grass String Trimmer as weapon on one of the goons. As the goon reaches for his gun, Machete repeatedly uses the trimmer on his fingers without hurting him badly.
* ImprovisedWeapon: TheMovie of the trope. Machete turns just about every prop within arms reach into a weapon. Booth is shown "disciplining" one of his {{Mooks}} with a USB cable. Sartana kills one man with a table ornament and another with her shoes.
* IncrediblyLamePun - Luz's alter-ego, "Shé". Pronounced like Che. You know, overused Communist icon.
** [[FridgeBrilliance Luz says outright that "Shé" is now just an icon to the Mexicans.]]
* JanitorImpersonationInfiltration: Machete shows up with [[PaperThinDisguise gardening tools]], and the guards just let him in.
** And, of course, he actually IS dressed as a janitor earlier in the movie to get to his sniper perch.
* KatanasAreJustBetter: Torres' weapon of choice. Leads to [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome a swordfight between katana-wielder and machete-wielder.]]
* KarmaHoudini:
** [[spoiler: Osiris, who disappears before the climax, due to his death scene getting left on the cutting room floor. Remnants of Von Jackon's vigilantes manage to escape and continue gunning down people they think are Mexicans. Torres' female sidekick just walks off.]]
** In a rare [[ZigzaggingTrope Triple Subversion]], [[spoiler: [=McLaughlin=]. First he looks like he's going to escape disguised as a Mexican [after helping the Mexicans, strangely enough], but then April shoots him. Then he turns out to have survived thanks to a bulletproof vest, and flees on foot. But then he gets killed by Von Jackson's men, mistaking him for a Mexican.]]
* KarmicDeath / HoistByHisOwnPetard: [[spoiler: [=McLaughlin=] - after putting on a Hispanic-looking outfit to escape the Big Final Shootout - is caught stumbling along the border fence by remnants of Von Jackson's army and shot down, falling into the electrified fence. [=McLaughlin=] even smiles as he dies, apparently appreciating the irony.]]
* KavorkaMan: Ladies ''love'' Machete.
** Considering the trailer insists "Machete gets the women," this [[YouCantFightFate was unavoidable]].
* KnifeNut: Machete and Torres. AND HOW!
* MadeOfPlasticine: At one point, Jessica Alba picks up a pyramid-shaped sculpture and rams it through a guy's chest.
* MacheteMayhem: A given. Machete later gets a ridiculously huge one in the final battle that disappears during the showdown with [[spoiler:Torres]].
* MafiaPrincess: April.
* MagicalSecurityCam: The playback of the taping of Von Jackson and [=McLaughlin=] shooting Mexicans attempting to cross the border simply replays the scene early in the film, complete with angle cuts.
* MajorInjuryUnderreaction: [[spoiler: Torres undersells getting impaled with a machete in a way only Steven Seagal can.]]
** [[spoiler: With the machete still sticking in him, Torres appears to attempt a ritual disemboweling: knowing he was already dead, he tries going out like a {{Samurai}} but fails, much to his Asian girlfriend's disgust.]]
* MaleGaze: Used several times, notably with Luz (by Machete) and a nurse (by [=McLaughlin=]) [=McLaughlin=] gets yelled at for it.
--> [[LampshadeHanging "I can feel your eyeballs reaching my uterus..."]]
* MaskedLuchador: One of the assassins attacking Machete and Sartana wears a Lucha mask [[spoiler:to conceal the fact the Feds are now after Sartana]].
* MayDecemberRomance: 29-year-old Jessica Alba and 66-year-old Danny Trejo.
* MeaningfulEcho: "If not us, then who?"
* MeaningfulName: Machete, Booth...
** Probably the most meaningful name in the entire movie is Luz, who is a beacon of hope for her people.
* MisfitMobilizationMoment: The "Network" mobilizes.
* ModestyBedsheet: Jessica Alba poses nude in front of a refrigerator with her arms positioned in just the right way to hide anything naughty (and in fact Alba was wearing normal underwear which was CGI'd out.
* MoeGreeneSpecial: [[spoiler: Luz. She survives it.]]
* MotherDaughterThreesome: Machete scores with June and April Booth at the same time. And sends the video to Papa Booth.
* MobileKiosk: Luz's taco van.
* NationalStereotypes: Plays with the Mexican stereotypes.
** The Mooks all seem to be Irish-American or Italian-American. Oh, and one [[TokenMinority Black]] [[BlackDudeDiesFirst guy]], whose death isn't shown.
* NeverTrustATrailer: while the film is mostly faithful to scenes filmed for the 'Original' trailer, some scenes from the ''real'' trailers don't appear in the final cut.
** One scene from the ''Grindhouse'' trailer that didn't make the real film is [[spoiler: the shot of Booth cowering behind armed guards while Machete launches himself with a gatling gun/motorcycle combo at them. Booth dies in another scene and isn't there when Machete goes all GatlingGood at the bad guys.]]
** There's also Machete's coat uncovered a '''lot''' of machetes strapped '''everywhere.''' In the film, he just uses two hilariously huge machetes in the final battle.
** The trailer originally had Machete taking aim at the senator as he coasted town the street in a convertible, full on JFK style.
* NoCelebritiesWereHarmed: [=McLaughlin=] is a far right-wing politician out of Texas, [[spoiler: [[GeorgeWBush who isn't even from Texas originally]].]]
* NonIndicativeName: Machete does most of his damage with Improvised Weapons. And one Weaponized Motorcycle.
* NoodleIncident: All those newspaper headlines that [[strike:Luz]] "She" was responsible for...
* NoOneShouldSurviveThat: [[spoiler: Luz]] was shot through the ''eye'' at not much more than point blank range, and except for the obvious loss of vision in that eye survives without lasting ill effects, even though such a wound (if survivable at all) would likely result in massive brain damage.
** Yeah, except it's MichelleRodriguez, so [[MemeticBadass it makes perfect sense]].
** The bullet could have lodged in her cheekbone. People have survived some really absurd gunshots in RealLife.
* NoPartyGiven: [=McLaughlin=] is referred to as an "independent" candidate. [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Texas_Senate#Current_composition On that basis alone, his odds of winning probably weren't too good.]] Indeed, Booth tells him he would never be reelected without him.
* TheNotSecret - Luz is She... whoda thunk?
* OffhandBackhand: Booth's {{dragon}} doesn't even look as he shoots [=McLaughlin=].
** He looks when he fires, it's just that he first turns the rifle towards [=McLaughlin=] while still looking/smirking at Machete.
* OffstageVillainy - Torres' drug operations have been... expanding.
* OffWithHisHead: Machete decapitates a lot of people, including five guys with a single stroke in the opening scene.
* OhCrap:
** "You're telling me that Mexican day-laborer is a '''GOD DAMN FEDERALE'''?!"
** Also, when Booth gets Machete's first-ever [[spoiler:text message.]]
** And when the bad guys' plan for immigration begins falling apart...
* OnlyAFleshWound
-->'''Machete:''' "I wasn't going to kill [=McLaughlin=]. I was only going to shoot him in the neck, to stop him from saying those stupid things."
* OohMeAccentsSlipping: Steven Seagal as Torres, which is almost certainly completely intentional. One hopes.
* PapaWolf: [[spoiler: Booth to his drug-troubled daughter April. It would be his redeeming quality, if it wasn't because he wants to bone her. At least he knows it's wrong, and has confessed it to a priest.]]
* ParentalIncest[=/=]VillainousIncest: Booth confesses to impure thoughts about April. Meanwhile, she's filming porn with her mother.
* ThePasswordIsAlwaysSwordfish: Invoked when [[spoiler: Machete]] hacks the encrypted files on [[spoiler: Booth's]] computer.
* ProductionPosse: Danny Trejo and Darryl Sabarra were both SpyKids directed by Rodriguez and Alba ended up in the next one.
* PlotHole: As with most other tropes in this film, deliberately used as a throwback to poorly cut and hastily shot grindhouse films that were rife with these.
* PsychoForHire: Osiris Amanpour (1-800-HITMAN)
* RagtagBunchOfMisfits: The Network. Also counts as LaResistance.
* RampJump: An incredibly {{egregious}} example at the climax of the movie: Machete mounts a [[GatlingGood minigun]] onto a [[CoolBike chopper]], and ramps off of a part of the scenery with a [[ImpressivePyrotechnics huge explosion]] behind him (with no apparent cause [[RuleOfCool other than]] [[AwesomenessIsVolatile it would be awesome]]), and cuts down a dozen mooks with gunfire before landing.
* RatedMForManly: The movie is a homage to the [[RoaringRampageOfRevenge avenging anti-hero]] movies of TheSeventies. So it's got everything - guns, [[MacheteMayhem machetes]], explosions, machetes, sexy women, [[OverlyLongGag machetes]], and tequila - that made such movies so manly. And ''thankfully'' without the awful disco soundtracks. Well, besides the scene with Lohan. Oh, we forgot to mention it's a {{Grindhouse}} spinoff.
* RealTrailerFakeMovie: ''Machete'' started out as one of these.
* RealitySubtext: LindsayLohan as a drugged-out amateur porn star who's trying to have a legit career? ''Awkwaaard.'' But hilarious.
* RecycledInSpace!: As of Comic Con 2011, the sequel Machete Kills Again has been retitled Machete Kills Again IN SPACE!
* RefugeInCool, RefugeInAudacity, RuleOfCool: Take your pick.
** [[SoBadItsGood Refuge In So Bad Its Good]]: every [[WhatHappenedToTheMouse plot hole]], SpecialEffectsFailure, awful delivery, [[FlatCharacter poorly defined character]] and ConspicuousCG only make it a better homage to the schlock that codified these tropes.
* RetiredBadass: Played straight with Padre. [[spoiler:Heavily implied with Luz.]]
--> "I don't kill anymore." "You don't kill any ''less'', either."
* RightManInTheWrongPlace: The plot gets kicked off when Machete's framed for assassination of a racist senator - Booth has no idea he just hired the wrong Mexican.
* RightWingMilitiaFanatic: Von Jackson and his border vigilantes.
* RoaringRampageOfRevenge: They DID, after all, just fuck with the wrong Mexican...
* RousingSpeech: given by [[spoiler: Sartana]] to the Mexican workers, and it's appropriately cheesy.
* RuleOfFun: Robert [=DeNiro's=] reason for being here.
* RunningGag : Von Jackson's [[TheDragon dragon]] throwing up after witnessing something violent. [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] by Von Jackson himself.
-->"You need to work on that."
** Torres saying "puñeta" every time he shows up. It's, sadly, a practically untranslatable Spanish curse word(the closest it can be translated to is "jerking off" used as an exclamation or adjective), [[BilingualBonus but to any person familiar with Spanish, it's rolling-on-the-floor funny.]]
* TheSavageSouth: insane Mexican mercenary runs amok in Texas.
* [[ScrewTheRulesImDoingWhatsRight Screw The Rules, I'm Doing What's Right]]: When Sartana gets pulled off the case, she decides to deliver all the evidence she has acquired from Machete to a news reporter.
-->"Well, [[ToBeLawfulOrGood there's the law and there's what's right]]. [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome I'm gonna do what's right]]."
* ScrewThisImOuttaHere: Upon encountering Machete ''again'' after getting getting shot in the legs during Machete's escape from the framing, a mook [[KnowWhenToFoldEm immediately quits angrily.]]
* SequelHook: [[spoiler: "Machete... Will Return in... ''Machete Kills!'' And... ''Machete Kills Again!''"]]
* TheSiege: The climax of the film. Rather appropriately, given the film's pro-immigration themes, the heroes are the ones trying to break into the fort.
* SirNotAppearingInThisTrailer: Jeff Fahey was barely in the trialer and did not appear on a lot of promotional material, despite having more screen time than De Niro and Seagal.
* ShoutOut:
** In the original ''Grindhouse'' trailer, Machete is seen inspecting a table full of weapons while JohnCarpenter's synthesizer score from ''EscapeFromNewYork'' plays, imitating a scene from that film.
** And the wide shot of the four bad guys walking into the church seems to echo the [=DiVAS=] entering the church in ''KillBill''
** [[spoiler:Luz]] in an eyepatch and stepping out of an ambulance covered in leather could homages Elle Driver and/or Snake Plissken.
** Padre [[spoiler:getting shot quite badly in the knee in the church]] echoes Marquez's injuries in ''OnceUponATimeInMexico''
** And the BloodyHilarious intestines...thing seems to echo El and Carolina's hotel escape in ''OnceUponATimeInMexico'', except that was a chain.
** A gunfight against mob enforcers in a church while Ave Maria plays in the background is a reference to JohnWoo films.
** Don't forget where the name {{Sartana}} comes from.
** Senator [=McLaughlin=] (played by Robert [=DeNiro=]) drives to the Vigilantes' compound in a... [[TaxiDriver taxi]].
** Another ShoutOut to ''OnceUponATimeInMexico:'' The shadowy freedom fighter is called "She". El Mariachi is also known as simply "El," which is Spanish for "He" (or possibly "the").
* ShroudedInMyth: "She," as well as Machete by the end.
* ShutUpHannibal: A rare example by a villain. Booth delivers his HannibalLecture to [=McLaughlin=] about how much the senator needs him, and [=McLaughlin=] responds by shooting him.
* SoundtrackDissonance: The use of Ave Maria and Vicente Fernandez's "El Rey" during scenes of slaughter.
* SouthOfTheBorder: Parodied.
* SpicyLatina: Not just MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl for this trope but also JessicaAlba who rarely plays this role, as well as several more. The nude woman in the opening scene also counts.
* SpinOff: Of GrindHouse and SpyKids, though the latter's only connected by a character name and actor.
* SplitScreen: Fight scene at Jessica Alba's house.
* SpoilerOpening: You'll notice a difference between Luz in the opening credits and Luz in the movie. [[spoiler:The one in the credits has an eyepatch...]]
* StevenUlyssesPerhero: During one scene, Machete is listed as the character's ''birth name''.
* StrawmanPolitical[=/=]StrawHypocrite: Senator [=McLaughlin=], [[ExaggeratedTrope to the point of absurdity]].
** [[CrowningMomentOfFunny When your political ads could have come straight from a GTA game]], it's kind of a given.
* TheStoic: Machete. Even when faced with the prospect of getting laid. And in the middle of sex.
* StylisticSuck - This being a {{Grindhouse}} spinoff and parody... you can tell Rodriguez was aiming to fill the movie to the brim with cheesy special effects and intentional FridgeLogic. For example, a lot of the effects are obviously intentionally half-assed or done wrong.
* TakeThat: A ''Cinco De Mayo''-themed trailer was issued with "A [[http://popwatch.ew.com/2010/05/05/machete-trailer-lohan/ special message]]... to ARIZONA!" In response to an anti-illegal-immigrant law (SB 1070) that had just passed in that state.
* TakingYouWithMe: [[spoiler: Torres]] considers this as he's dying...
-->''"...But you'll probably be in Hell waiting for me."''
* TechnicalPacifist: Machete, believe it or not. Sure, he kills ''a lot'' of people, but he goes out of his way to take out a lot through nonlethal means. Note the group of {{Mooks}} who live to encounter him a second time - only to survive again.
* ThemeNaming: April and June.
* ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill: Such as lowriders smashing people or strangling people with someone elses' guts.
* [[TheyCallHimSword They Call Him Machete]]: [[HisNameReallyIsBarkeep That's also his real first name]].
* ThirdPersonPerson: Machete sometimes refers to himself as this. "Machete don't text. Machete improvises."
* ThoseTwoGuys: Booth's security guards and the two dishwashers.
* ThrowItIn: Apparently the awesome line "Machete don't text" arose from a real-life communication between DannyTrejo and RobertRodriguez
* [[ThrowingYourSwordAlwaysWorks Throwing Your Machete Always Works]]: In this movie, ''it does.''
* TisOnlyABulletInTheBrain: Machete and Luz both survive a bullet in the brain unscathed (well... minus an eye in Luz's case but it doesn't seem to cause her much trouble.)
** Machete actually survived two. The first bullet saved his life by stopping the second bullet's advance.
* TrailersAlwaysSpoil: Anyone who's seen the trailer (or even just the opening credits) will know that Luz survives losing her eye and gets a patch.
** She also appears with the eyepatch on the cover of the DVD.
* {{Troperrific}}: No exploitation movie trope was left untouched!
* TwoPersonPoolParty: ...or Three Person in this case, as Machete scores with mother/daughter pair June and April Booth.
* [[OneSceneWonder Two Scene Wonder]]: The hilariously GenreSavvy guards.
* UglyGuyHotWife: Perhaps not ugly, but Machete is definitely scarred and craggy-looking. And both his wife (for the half-minute she was alive on-film) and Sartana are considerably easier on the eyes.
* TheUnreveal: The fate of Machete's daughter. Torres claims in the opening sequence that he'll kill Machete's daughter but we never find out if he did. A later scene implies that Luz is Machete's daughter but we never find out if that's true either.
* VasquezAlwaysDies: [[spoiler: Subverted. MichelleRodriguez, the poster girl of the trope, gets a bullet in the eye... but [[IGotBetter returns later]] in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. And to top it off, she survives after that as well. Of course, there's always the sequel(s) to play this trope straight.]]
* TheVerse: Apparently, takes place in the same universe as ''SpyKids'', albeit a ''much'' DarkerAndEdgier version of it.
** If this is true, then Sartana has another twin sister (see WhatCouldHaveBeen) who's married and a spy...
* VictoriasSecretCompartment: This might be an example, or it might not be, but the nude woman in the opening scene eventually withdraws a phone from Victoria's OTHER Secret Compartment. In other words, someplace you really, really [[CountryMatters shouldn't keep a phone]].
* TheVoiceless: One Mexican only communicates with a sketchpad.
* WeaponizedCar: a whole fleet of these in the climax. Except that at some point they ran out of weapons and [[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotAwesome put in hydraulics instead.]]
* WhatCouldHaveBeen:
** The deleted scenes contain several. Sartana had a slutty twin sister constantly whacked out on Ny Quil that also lived with her, and they also greatly disliked each other - [[spoiler: she is later murdered by one of Osiris' partners who also didn't make it into the film, followed up by a scene of Sartana finding her body and showing she really did care about her]]; Osiris had another female partner named Boots [=McCoy=] (complete with her own title card introduction), who seemed to be quite crazy [[spoiler: originally she was the one to shoot Luz in the eye (by using a live cat as a silencer no less) instead of Von Jackson, and she also kills Sartana's twin sister by slitting her throat with a razor blade in her mouth]]; Osiris' fate, detailed below; Sartana questions Senator [=McLaughlin=] and Booth in the hospital about the assassination attempt; and scene of the Senator being interviewed by the latina reporter at the station. There's always Machete Kills...
** Chris Cooper was the first choice for the Senator [=McLaughlin role=]. He turned it down as he thought the script was too weird.
* WhatHappenedToTheMouse: [[CareerKillers Osiris]] disappears before the climax, without getting killed or finishing his job. In one of his later scenes, he notes that Machete isn't looking for ''him'', implying that he simply quit. He was originally supposed to get caught scoping out the chop shop and get decapitated by a power saw, but the scene was deleted.
* WhenAllYouHaveIsAHammer: the white kid's buddy is an artist who draws perfect portraits of Sartana and Machete. What does he do in the final fight, when the nurses, Wrench Wenches and dishwashers are all packing heat? Just... run around sketching like mad, apparently.
* WilhelmScream: One of the border vigilantes emits one in the climax before [[CarFu being squashed by a hydraulics-hopping lowrider]].
* WorldOfBadass: It can be simply said that the entire cast lives and breathes badassery.
* WorldOfHam: Machete ''is'' the page summary for this trope.
* WouldNotShootAGoodGuy: Machete spares the lives of Booth's guards, who only had an extremely vague clue as to what their boss was getting up to. Also, when he is "arrested" by phony cops, he waits until he hears them admit that they're fake before killing them.
* WriterOnBoard: Played for laughs and invoked. Rodriguez does, apparently, mean the film's pro-immigration stance sincerely, but he also portrays the conflict as not even really about race, but about money, with a Mexican drug lord as one of the main villains, and turns up the {{narm}} and {{anvilicious}}ness up, since it ''is'' meant to be a throwback to stupid race exploitation films.
* YouHaveFailedMe: Torres, Booth, [=McLaughlin=], and Von Jackson don't like it when their underlings make too many mistakes. [[spoiler: They even start turning on ''each other'' when their more monstrous actions go public, Booth getting killed and Von Jackson about to execute [=McLaughlin=].]]
* YouHaveOutlivedYourUsefulness - [[spoiler:All the bad guys to each other when Machete ruins their plans, ''again'']]
* YouKilledMyFather: Textbook example when [[spoiler:April shows up in the end to shoot [=McLaughlin=].]]
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