History BlatantLies / Literature

** Because most of the people are [[WeirdnessCensor deeply in denial]], large amounts of crap can be made up without anyone noticing. For example, a magical diagram to redirect a curse onto its originator is "Feng Shui", and Murphy once suggested calling in Homeland Security on the Denarians' demon-possessed asses by saying they're "terrorists with advanced biotechnology suits." However, this also gets {{Double Subver|sion}}ted in ''Literature/TurnCoat'' when a security guard insists on taking Harry's staff, which he says is "traditional Ozark folk art": not because he knows that the staff covered in mystic runes has, in the past, been used to blast a rampaging hell-werewolf all the way through two buildings, but because he thinks Harry could smack someone with it. Harry has been known to do just that at times.

** In ''Discworld/{{Thud}}'', a fight nearly breaks out between a troll and a dwarf officer. Commander Vimes enters the room to find a table overturned, and the potential combatants being restrained by their fellow officers. He asks who's going to be the first to "tell me a huge whopper". Nobby Nobbs obliges by offering up an utterly preposterous explanation about how the dwarf almost drank some (dangerously chemical) troll coffee, and the others rushed to stop him. Vimes pretends to buy it, and the others pretend to believe that he buys it. Much of what Nobby Nobbs does involves this trope. He has been seen using the excuse that his "granny died" in order to get out of work. When directly asked by Colon, he says that this is about the twentieth one it happened to (although three of them were genuine; Granny Nobbs was OnlyMostlyDead the first time). Watchmen seem to be expected to have that particular excuse, having been given three afternoons off for grandmother's funerals a year.
*** The "grandmother's funeral" excuse comes up again when two troll constables are given an order to apprehend another troll, Acting-Constable Detritus. This exchange promptly occurs (which showcases genius-level thinking, for a troll):
----> '''Sergeant Colon''': Lance-Constable Coalface! Lance-Constable Bauxite! Apprehend Acting-Constable Detritus!\\

*** Nobby Nobbs only used the Grandmother's Funeral excuse twice...per year.

%%** This is Caine's expertise.
%%--->'''Emily:''' You can get the lights back on?\\
%%'''Caine:''' I can. It would take about a week.
%%** Astrid does it a ton. There's a REASON she's on the cover of the book called ''Lies''.

* In ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'' the Frey's excuse for the Red Wedding is that [[spoiler: Robb's forces attacked first by ''transforming into wolves'' and that they were forced to kill them. In self defense. Of course.]] Unsurprisingly, no one really buys this; they're relying more on people having to accept it for political reasons. It's not proving very effective.
** One observer sarcastically notes that it looks like the Freys realized that nobody was ever going to believe them no matter what excuse they gave, so they decided to go all out to at least come up with something memorably creative.

* ''Literature/JourneyToChaos'': Everyime Nolien says, "I'm not part of the Heleti family" he's wearing the medallion that is given to the ''heir'' of the Heleti family. Nobody believes him, but they play along.

* A lot of people in ''Literature/APracticalGuideToEvil'' do this, but nobody is quite as blatant as [[spoiler:Indrani]] The Archer.
-->“We protected the innocent until surrender ensued,” [[spoiler: Indrani]] proudly replied, then spoiled the way she’d kept her face straight through that by badly winking.
* ''Literature/TheMonsterAtTheEndOfThisBook,'' in the ''Series/SesameStreet'' Golden Book children's literature series. The story is about Grover, who tries to convince the reader to not finish the book because there is a horrifying, evil monster lurking on the final page. A series of obstacles (e.g., tying the pages together with Army rope, brick walls, etc.) of course don't work. The trope comes at the end: the "scary" monster at the end of the book is merely Grover! ("Oh, I'm so embarrassed!" he says sheepishly.) One of the earliest and most successful ''Sesame Street'' books to date, a rewrite was commissioned in 1996, with Grover finding Elmo as the "horrifying monster" at the end of the updated version. (Although to some, Elmo would avert the trope, believing ''him'' to indeed be a scary monster.)

** This is Caine's expertise.
---> '''Emily:''' You can get the lights back on?\\
'''Caine:''' I can. It would take about a week.
** Astrid does it a ton. There's a REASON she's on the cover of the book called ''Lies''.

* In the classic novel ''Literature/{{Gladiator}}'', when his Army superiors ask for an explanation of his superhuman powers, Hugo Danner does ''NOT'' speak of his father's medical experiments. Instead, he simply says, "I'm from Colorado." [[RefugeInAudacity His superiors believe him.]]
* [[Literature/ClockpunkAndTheVitalizer Clockpunk]] tells The Vitalizer she's the Bull. The audience is well aware that she is ''not'', in fact, the Bull; it's being shipped elsewhere as she says it. The Vitalizer is not so knowledgeable.
* ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles'':
** Because most of the people are [[WeirdnessCensor deeply in denial]], large amounts of crap can be made up without anyone noticing. For example, a magical diagram to redirect a curse onto its originator is "Feng Shui", and Murphy once suggested calling in Homeland Security on the Denarians' demon-possessed asses by saying they're "terrorists with advanced biotechnology suits." However, this also gets {{Double Subver|sion}}ted in "Turn Coat" when a security guard insists on taking Harry's staff, which he says is "traditional Ozark folk art": not because he knows that the staff covered in mystic runes has, in the past, been used to blast a rampaging hell-werewolf all the way through two buildings, but because he thinks Harry could smack someone with it. Harry has been known to do just that at times.
** And then there's this little gem [[UnreliableNarrator from Harry's narration]] in ''Ghost Story'':
--->I'd dealt with a ghost named Agatha Hagglethorn once, and she'd had her own little pocket dimension filled with a Victorian era copy of Chicago.\\
([[DestructiveSavior It burned down]].)\\
(I was not responsible.)
** Murphy's job with Special Investigations is fifty percent solving supernatural crimes with Harry, and fifty percent concocting lies to explain away the resulting chaos to her superiors ''without'' acknowledging the supernatural exists. Which her superiors know ''does'' exist, they just don't want their cops to admit as much on public record. Harry's remarked that Murphy could've had a successful second career writing SpeculativeFiction.
** A RunningGag in the series is buildings being on fire or having burnt down and it not being Harry's fault.
--->'''First line of the 6th book''': The building was on fire, and it wasn't my fault.
* Literature/{{Discworld}}:
** ''Discworld/MenAtArms'': When the rest of the Watch finds out Angua is a werewolf, they ask Colon if Vimes knew. Colon cagily claims he "sort of implied it," but when pressed admits his exact words were "She's a bloody werewolf, Fred."
** In ''Discworld/MakingMoney'', Moist asks why Mrs. Lavish keeps two loaded crossbows on her desk. The answer is "family heirlooms". He notes that a lie so blatant is clearly meant to make a statement rather than be believed. Considering the rest of her family, it's more of a [[MetaphoricallyTrue Jedi Truth]]. If any of her family tries anything funny, the crossbow bolts will be heirlooms, after they've been...''forcibly gifted'' upon the family member in question.
** In ''Discworld/{{Thud}}'', a fight nearly breaks out between a troll and a dwarf officer. Commander Vimes enters the room to find a table overturned, and the potential combatants being restrained by their fellow officers. He asks who's going to be the first to "tell me a huge whopper". Nobby Nobbs obliges by offering up an utterly preposterous explanation about how the dwarf almost drank some (dangerously chemical) troll coffee, and the others rushed to stop him. Vimes pretends to buy it, and the others pretend to believe that he buys it. Much of what Nobby Nobbs does involves this trope. He has been seen using the excuse that his "granny died" in order to get out of work. When directly asked by Colon, he says that this is about the twentieth one it happened to (although three of them were genuine; Granny Nobbs was OnlyMostlyDead the first time). Watchmen seem to be expected to have that particular excuse, having been given three afternoons off for grandmother's funerals a year.
*** The "grandmother's funeral" excuse comes up again when two troll constables are given an order to apprehend another troll, Acting-Constable Detritus. This exchange promptly occurs (which showcases genius-level thinking, for a troll):
----> '''Sergeant Colon''': Lance-Constable Coalface! Lance-Constable Bauxite! Apprehend Acting-Constable Detritus!\\
'''Lance-Constable Bauxite''': ''[salutes]'' Permission for leave to attend grandmother's funeral, sir?\\
'''Sergeant Colon''': Why?\\
'''Lance-Constable Bauxite''': It her or me, sarge.
*** Nobby Nobbs only used the Grandmother's Funeral excuse twice...per year.
** ''Discworld/FeetOfClay'' has Vimes and Detritus discussing who possibly could have threatened Chrysophrase's drug smuggler, Hardcore, while a new applicant looks on in disbelief as Detritus's assurances that none of HIS trolls would ever do such a thing (and yet he knew who was threatened and why) are accepted.
*** This is also a MetaphoricallyTrue case since none of Detritus' trolls actually did the deed. It was Detritus himself.
** ''Discworld/MonstrousRegiment''. Roughly every other spoken line (though one specific character ''[[ExactWords technically]]'' only lies about one thing...).
--->'''Sgt. Jackrum:''' [[ExactWords Upon my oath, I am not a dishonest man.]][[labelnote:Spoiler]]True, since ''she'' is not a man.[[/labelnote]]

* In ''Literature/BlackLegion'', Khayon reassures Lheor that travelling through sorcerers' gate is "just like teleportation". As it turns out, it's ''not'', as you have to fight your way through scores of daemons. Upon passing the gate, Lheor [[SugarWiki/FunnyMoments decks Khayon for this]].
* Twice in the ''Comicbook/XWingSeries'' novel ''Wraith Squadron'':
** The Wraiths, pretending to be the crew of a warship, are on that warship's mission, touring planets aligned with Warlord Zsinj. The captain dies while they are capturing his ship, and at some point a planetary governor hails them and wants to talk to that captain. Improvising, the squadron's actor coats a pair of goggles with fluorescent paint, sticks one end of a tube in his nostril, the other in his ear (to disguise his distinctive features), and pretends to be a lieutenant and says that the captain is in the bath, dictating his memoirs. When the governor states his confusion, the actor roars that Captain Darillian has to budget his time; he's not some planetary governor who can [[WhiteCollarCrime skim taxes with one hand]] and pick his nose with the other!
** Later, the Wraiths' actor, "Face" Loran [[DeadPersonImpersonation impersonates]] that captain with [[OfCorpseHesAlive the help]] of his full-holo CaptainsLog. Most of the people who they met either hadn't known the man or had barely met him and knew little of him other than his [[LargeHam melodrama]] and [[SmallNameBigEgo ego]]. But then the actor talks in depth to Darillian's immediate superior, making him suspicious when they turn out not to know something the captain should. He gets out of this by [[IndyPloy furiously improvising]], again, and telling the admiral, as the captain, that it's been a very long time since he was home. The admiral knows that, and that the captain's family died thanks to Isard. The actor, as the captain, continues to improvise and tells the admiral that he was in love with Isard, and was wildly conflicted and distracted by this. Going off on a tangent about her, the actor fascinated the admiral long enough that he forgot about his suspicions and almost fell into the Wraiths' trap. This was helped by the fact that Loran had met Isard in person, and his particular talents allowed him to notice and remember very subtle details about her.
--->'''Face''': Thank you, thank you. Performances every hour, on the hour. Imperial madmen a specialty.

--->'''"not-Wedge"''': Who do you think I am?\\
'''Face''': Um... Commander Wedge Antilles, New Republic Starfighter Command?\\
'''"not-Wedge"''': No no no no... if I were Antilles, I'd be wearing proper rank insignia, wouldn't I?
** Another from ''Wraith Squadron'', when Wedge breaks up a fight:
--->'''Phanan''': We were discussing the finer points of a specific hand-to-hand combat maneuver...\\
'''Wedge''': Flight Officer Phanan, how many times do you think I've heard that "we were talking about a boxing move" excuse?

--->'''Wedge''': We'll need a wheeled transport, one of the flatcam units our pursuers are carrying, and four sets of women's clothing.\\
'''Hobbie''': Boss, please tell me you're not putting us in women's clothing.\\
'''Wedge''': Very well. I'm not putting us in women's clothing.\\

'''Hobbie''': You lied to me.\\
'''Wedge''': I did. With [[SarcasmMode my brilliant achievements in the diplomatic profession]] has come the realization that lies can be powerful motivators.\\
'''Hobbie''': My faith is shattered.\\
'''Wedge''': You knew, when I said we needed four sets of women's clothing, that we were going to end up in them. You ''knew''. So any hopes you had to the contrary were just self-delusion.\\
'''Hobbie''': I understand that. But I'd rather blame you than me.
* In the Creator/RobertAHeinlein novel ''Literature/StarmanJones,'' the main character questions one of his friends about the contents of some boxes the friend has smuggled aboard. The friend claims they're tea cosies, which he's importing as "skullcaps for pinheads". Not so much.
* In ''[[Literature/CallahansCrosstimeSaloon Callahan's Secret]],'' by Spider Robinson, Mike Callahan recounts how, after a dimly-remembered alcoholic event, he woke up naked in New York and wound up riding a police horse, using the horse blanket as a toga. He averted attention by galloping boldly through the streets and periodically shouting, "Attack of the Horseclans! Coming soon from Creator/UnitedArtists!"
* In ''[[LightNovel/{{Baccano}} Drugs & the Dominoes]]'', when Luck Gandor [[PullingThemselvesTogether pulls himself together after]] near-decapitation in front of a witness, there's no possible plausible lie, so he goes for a blatant one:
-->'''Luck:''' ''[grabs magazine with a red cover off shelf]'' Oh my, that was dangerous. If not for the timely rescue of this book, I would have died.\\
'''Shopkeeper:''' Uh... that... no... ''blood''.\\
'''Luck:''' ''[rips magazine]'' It was the cover of this book scattering everywhere. You saw wrongly. It was too sudden.\\
'''Shopkeeper:''' But--\\
'''Luck:''' [[ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney Oh right, I have to repay you for this book...]]
* Everything Shin-tsu of ''LightNovel/TheLongingOfShiinaRyo'' says is taken as this, even though he's telling the truth. It's not his fault the Universe made him its [[CosmicPlaything plaything.]]
* TheAntiChrist in ''Literature/LeftBehind'', despite supposedly being the agent (and later, living avatar) of the [[{{Satan}} Prince Of Lies]], uses a lot of these. It only works since he has some ill-defined MindControl powers to back him up, and more importantly because the authors portray the entire population of the planet after the Rapture [[IdiotPlot as morons.]]
* In the first ''Literature/StarTrekMillennium'' novel, when Dr. Bashir asks Garak to aid him in identifying two recently-discovered bodies (referencing Garak's expertise), Garak responds: "Oh, Doctor, I'm afraid that in matters of mysterious deaths, I am entirely bereft of experience". No-one is amused. Bashir then clarifies he wanted Garak to examine their clothing..."I meant your expertise as a tailor".
* In ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'' the Frey's excuse for the Red Wedding is that [[spoiler: Robb's forces attacked first by ''transforming into wolves'' and that they were forced to kill them. In self defense. Of course.]] Unsurprisingly, no one really buys this; they're relying more on people having to accept it for political reasons. It's not proving very effective.
** One observer sarcastically notes that it looks like the Freys realized that nobody was ever going to believe them no matter what excuse they gave, so they decided to go all out to at least come up with something memorably creative.
** Once upon a time, there was a massive civil war in the Seven Kingdoms (the Dance of the Dragons) for which any unbiased accounts about either side are rather thin on the ground. Except, there is that one chronicle recorded by the court fool, Mushroom. Problem is, he mixes truth, liable, tall tales, gossip and outright unbelievable lies in with his unabashedly negative portrayal of both sides of the conflict. Maesters use his accounts when writing about the period, since they're the best they've got, but they always comment about the dodginess.
* ''Literature/AnElegyForTheStillLiving'': Francis Church convinces a prisoner to play a game where they take turns asking and answering questions. Either player can accuse the other of lying. If the accuser is correct, he wins the game. The prisoner spots a loophole in the rules and decides never to make an accusation. Almost everything Francis says from that point on is a lie. Some of what he says is actually pretty subtle, but "I am not afraid of anything," is obviously untrue.

* In ''Literature/ABrothersPrice'', Jerin tells [[spoiler: the Porter sisters]] that he will marry them willingly, pleasure them in bed, and care for their children if they just don't kill Cira. Later Cira is surprised to find that he was lying, but like he said earlier in the book - "You have to be very careful [with lies], but we Whistlers have always thought it was a good thing to know how to do it well."
* Creator/GeorgeOrwell's ''Literature/NineteenEightyFour''. The Party has browbeaten and conditioned its citizens to believe even the most blatant lies that it spouts. The Party's lies often contradict its own previously told lies. And it's not enough for citizens to simply ''say'' that they believe the lies. They have to genuinely believe them.
* In the poem "Who Am I" from Literature/RavingLunacy, the author claims, among other things, to be "the sunshine, the moonlight, the good times and the boogie" (an obvious reference to Music/MichaelJackson) and "the reason why some believe the moon landing was a hoax" (a subtle lampooning of (ridiculous) [[ConspiracyTheorist conspiracy theories]]).
* In Creator/SeananMcGuire's ''Literature/OctoberDaye'' novel ''Ashes of Honor'', Chelsea tells her mother that [[spoiler:Toby's turning her into a full fae didn't hurt.]]
* In ''[[Literature/TroyRising The Hot Gates]]'' the entire Horvath diplomatic position is built on these. They even have the gall to demand compensation for the ships lost to "human pirates" when those ships were carrying out a ColonyDrop on several Earth cities, after their DepopulationBomb failed, and the humans decided to fight back. This is on top of demanding a restoration of their "protectorate" over Earth. Fortunately, not even their Rangora allies are supporting this position.
* In Creator/RuthFrancesLong's ''Literature/TheTreacheryOfBeautifulThings'', Jack's first attempt to get Jenny to go back is this, plus illusion to back up that he and Puck are not TheFairFolk.

%% * ''Literature/TheCasterChronicles'': Sarafine's love for Lena. Though it did have shades of truth.
* In ''Literature/TheBabySittersClub'' book ''Stacey's Mistake'', Kristy, Mary Anne, Claudia, and Dawn visit Stacey in New York. After their first night, Kristy sends her family a postcard describing the fun party Stacey hosted for them and all her New York friends, saying how much fun they had, how easily they fit in, and how Claudia and Stacey's New York best friend Laine were "like sisters." In reality, the party was a disaster, the New York kids either ignored or made fun of the baby-sitters, no one had a good time, and the only siblings Claudia and Laine resembled were CainAndAbel.
* In ''Literature/AWolfInTheSoul'', Joey attempts to defend Greg (in wolf form) from a hunter by claiming, rather ridiculously, that he's his pet dog. A part Labrador, part Golden Retriever named Muffin. "He's very tame. Does tricks and everything."
* In ''Literature/EmilyTheStrangeTheLostDays'', Earwig doesn't want to talk with her seatmate on the bus who just regaled her with his business at Witchita, where they are going.
--> Normal Guy: So, what are you doing, riding the Red Rabbit all by yourself?
--> Me: Sorry, I don't speak English.
--> NG: What? You sound like you speak English.
--> Me: Nope. I don't speak a word of English, and also, I have a speech defect, so if you don't mind, I'm going to sleep now.
* In ''Literature/WeAreNotAllMadeOfColour'', Magnum Brunel asserts that Aristotle was Socrates' father, that gravity causes cancer, and that Samuel Wilberforce wrote ''The Origin of Species.''
* ''Literature/WinnieThePooh'' has [[LovableCoward Piglet]] tell a lie in "Pooh and Piglet Go Hunting and Nearly Catch a Woozle" when he's scared at the prospect of the Woozles. What makes his lies blatant is its highly unlikely specifics.
--> '''Piglet''': "I think...I think that I have just remembered something. I have just remembered something that I forgot to do yesterday and shan't be able to do tomorrow. So I suppose I really ought to go back and do it now."
--> '''Pooh''': "We'll do it this afternoon, and I'll come with you."
--> '''Piglet''': *quickly* "It isn't the sort of thing you can do in the afternoon. It's a very particular morning thing that has to be done in the morning, and, if possible, between the hours of--What would you say the time was?"
--> '''Pooh''': *looking at the sun* "About twelve"
--> '''Piglet''': "Between, as I was saying, the hours of twelve and twelve five"
* ''Literature/JourneyToChaos'': Everyime Nolien says, "I'm not part of the Heleti family" he's wearing the medalion that is given to the ''heir'' of the Heleti family. Nobody believes him, but they play along.
* In ''Literature/TheAmulet'', Sarah asks Jo where she got a cursed amulet that's been slaughtering its way across town. Jo says she bought it in a Sears-Roebuck catalog. Sarah checks anyway and confirms that Jo is lying.
* This is a mainstay in the Literature/PigeonSeries of children's books. The Pigeon would try all kinds of shenanigans to convince the reader to let him do what he wants, from telling them that "their moms would let him do it" to outright bribing the reader with five bucks.
* In ''Literature/{{Watersong}}'', Gemma and Harper's mother, Nathalie, suffered a traumatic brain injury that turned her into a compulsive liar. She is constantly telling blatantly obvious lies, and grows upset when they are pointed out.
* Peter, who is from ''Candor'', claims he is not murderous when being held at gunpoint by [[spoiler:Tris]] in ''Literature/{{Divergent}}''. He had previously claimed that he was only trying to scare her by [[spoiler:throwing her down the chasm and molesting her]].
* ''Literature/{{Redwall}}'': Fangburn and Sela come up with a pathetic story to explain to Cluny why Redtooth is missing when he gets killed by Constance. They claim he fell in a mysteriously-appearing swamp, and they can't agree on the direction it was in.
* Played straight by the villains and their propaganda in ''Literature/{{Victoria}}''. Averted by the heroes, though interestingly more for MoralPragmatist reasons than because of HonorBeforeReason: Lies backfire when they are found out, whereas a ''true'' propaganda is invulnerable.
-->'''John Rumford:''' The first rule of good propaganda is to make sure the facts are accurate.
* In ''Literature/{{Ratburger}}'', the villain Burt claims to be his own twin brother with the same name because "his parents couldn't afford a name each."
* ''Literature/NinaTanleven'': In ''The Ghost in the Third Row'', at one point, Paula Geller asks Alan if he saw the ghost, and later says that she ''meant'' “Did you see something Lydia might have mistaken for the ghost?”. Nobody believes her.

* In ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'' the Frey's excuse for the Red Wedding is that [[spoiler: Robb's forces attacked first, ''transformed into wolves'' and they were forced to kill them in self defense.]] Unsurprisingly, no one really buys this; they're relying more on people having to accept it for political reasons. It's not proving very effective.

* In ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'' the Frey's excuse for the Red Wedding is that [[spoiler: Robb's forces attacked first, ''transformed into wolves'' and they were forced to kill them in self defense. Unsurprisingly no one really buys this, but they're relying on people accepting it for political reasons.]] It's not proving very effective.
** One observer sarcastically notes that it looks like the Freys realized that nobody was going to believe them no matter what excuse they gave, and so they decided to go all out and at least come up with something creative.

--->“We protected the innocent until surrender ensued,” [[spoiler: Indrani]] proudly replied, then spoiled the way she’d kept her face straight through that by badly winking.

* In ''Literature/BlackLegion'', Khayon reassures Lheor that travelling through sorcerers' gate is "just like teleportation". As it turns out, it's ''not'', as you have to fight your way through scores of daemons. Upon passing the gate, Lheor [[CrowningMomentOfFunny decks Khayon for this]].

* In the classic novel ''Literature/{{Gladiator}}'', when his Army superiors ask for an explanation of his superhuman powers, Hugo Danner does ''NOT'' speak of his father's medical experiments. Instead, he simply says, "I'm from Montana."

--->Sgt. Jackrum: [[ExactWords Upon my oath, I am not a dishonest man.]][[labelnote:Spoiler]]True, since ''she'' is not a man.[[/labelnote]]

* In ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'', after Bella is hurt by James, the Cullens are somehow able to pass her injuries off as [[UnfortunateImplications her falling down some steps]] and smashing through a window. Everyone buys this. When Bella is dropped off at the hospital, she has a broken leg, four broken ribs, cracks on her skull, bruises all over her skin, and severe blood loss. There is no mention of lacerations or injuries from impact, nor of bits of glass in her hair or clothes, and she was jacked up with morphine before being put in the hospital. In ''Breaking Dawn'', Bella and Edward try to pass their daughter off Edward's previously-unmentioned niece from a previously-unmentioned brother, who suddenly fell over dead and left his daughter in the care of the officially-underage Edward. From all of this, the only thing that clues Charlie in on the lies is the fact that Renesmee's eyes look exactly like Bella's.

* In ''{{Duumvirate}}'', Sarah raids and kills a pervert, then "found" a will on his hard drive that everything he owned was to go to her son. More a TakeThat than a lie meant to be believed.