Back to Funny.Cinema Sins.
This page is for all the funny moments in CinemaSins videos covering films that are part of a film series or franchise.
- "Leonid-ass." *ding* "Also, all of Sparta can see the king's ding-a-ling if they happen to look out their windows." *ding*
- "The director said "Here, eat an apple. It'll make you look like even more of an asshole." *ding*
300: Rise of an Empire
- Jeremy immediately adds 100 sins at the beginning of the movie to cover for all the slow motion scenes throughout the film.
- "Back during these times, blood looked an awful lot like strawberry jelly!"
- WHY DOES EVERY SHOT IN THIS MOVIE HAVE LITTLE FLYING WHITE PARTICLES EVERYWHERE?!
- This moment:Spartan: Leonidas was betrayed by a hunchback.Jeremy: Tom Hulce?
- The first two sins:This is the most gorgeous looking movie that I've ever wanted to punch in the face. (ding)This guy looks like a muscular water balloon; I want to pop him with a needle. (ding)
- "Movie explores the origins of juggling."
- "Oh man, this is the same valley Mufasa was killed in."
- "This guy confuses the captain for Google."
- "Jars of water and jars of pee."
- Chris' reaction to one of the movie's reveals:Vickers: ..father.Chris: I don't care. (ding)
- "This is exactly how Scooby and Shaggy would try to run from this thing."
- The stinger:I think this is an abortion even the red states can get behind.
- When the crew members decide to go down to the planet, Jeremy gives out this sage advice:Jeremy: No masks? Really? Remember kids, just because you CAN breathe something doesn't mean you should.
- This:Daniels: None of this makes sense.Jeremy: It is apparent that Daniels would be excellent at Cinema Sins.
- The "fingering" line:David: (to Walter) Watch me, I'll do the fingering.Jeremy: No way, man... The last time I heard this I got in a LOT of trouble with the wife!
- "So Kane is all better now. I guess we won't perform any X-rays or tests or anything. Alien species have no purpose other than being assholes, so everything should be A-OK!"
- As Jones the Cat coolly watches the Alien kill Brett:Jeremy: Mondays, amiright?
- And the general Fridge Logic of why the hell Jonesy was onboard the ship in the first place.
- Jeremy repeatedly pointing out all the phallic and vaginal imagery present throughout the movie.
- The later Robotic Reveal of Ash leads to plenty of gags throughout.
- Jeremy relates a story from his Pop Culture class in college as Bishop is getting impaled.
- And then we get to the iconic moment.
- After getting fed up with all of the horror movie cliches in the film, Jeremy says this:Jeremy: By my count, this is the 4th millionth time this has happened in a horror movie. I am CERTAIN the filmmakers will get a prize for this in a secret ceremony in Hollywood and the virgin sacrifice will appease their god, probably copied from another god.
- Jeremy compares the demon controlling the doll to a "less evil Jeff Dunham."
- After the movie's climax, Jeremy gives quite a number of sins about the movie's many unanswered questions, ending with this:Jeremy: Also, if any soul would do, then why didn't the demon also haunt John? Are you telling me only a female soul will do? That's racist. (ding)
- The sentence: Bride of Chucky.
- During the opening credits, showing Annabelle being built:Jeremy: And that's how Annabelle was created. The end.
- When a dumbwaiter moves by itself:
- At one point, Jeremy gets so annoyed with the movie, he doesn't sin it but instead plays clips from Glengarry Glen Ross, the band Ministry and Scrooged over the footage.
- "Sister Charlotte is amazing at both regular sins and CinemaSins."
- Jeremy's comments on Mrs. Mullers face:Jeremy: I want to play beer pong with her eye socket.
- The sentence: Seed of Chucky.
Back To the Future Part II
- On Jennifer being recast, and we first see her in the beginning...Jennifer: How 'bout a ride, Mister?
Jeremy:: Sure, but ... who the f*ck are you?
- When Doc says that they've travelled to October 21, 2015:Jeremy: Hey, that's the day of this video's launch!note What a coincide- Hang on... What? It's NOT a coincidence? Wow. Why wasn't I told about this?
- After a bunch of kids attempt to kill Principal Strickland in a drive-by shooting:Jeremy: These assholes hate their principal so much that they're still angry enough to try and kill him in a drive-by six years after they've been required by anybody to even attend school.note THAT... is a serious grudge.
- Jeremy sins the opening narration, not just because it's narration, but also because it's Ryan Reynolds doing it as Hannibal King, not Deadpool, which makes Jeremy forlorn.
- This:Hannibal: But the movies are all full of sh*t.Jeremy: Sins. I think you mean sins.
- "It doesn't get more David Goyer than a vampire flipping off the sun."
- When Blade uses his car headlights to kill a vampire:
- "Don't you like to remember, before Blade and Underworld came out, when vampires just liked eating people? No guns, no political sabotage...just eating people."
- This exchange:Whistler: What is it?Blade: What are you worried about?Jeremy: The window? The chain link fence? The moon? Blade, IS IT THE MOON?!
- Jeremy sums up Wesley Snipes's Dull Surprise performance:Jeremy: So emotion, such range.
- Hannibal Lecture.
- When Whistler dies, Blade's scream makes Jeremy wonder if he's just gone Super Saiyan.
- Jeremy points out a Canadian address left on a building and sarcastically congratulates the movie so "expertly hiding their filming location".
- "Is this not the largest shower in the history of showers? They could use that to shower elephants. Or cars. Or Wesley Snipes's tax bill.
- "King's fighting the pro wrestler and these two are swashbuckling. I'm just one iocane powder reference away from calling this a stealth sequel to The Princess Bride."
- One of the outtakes:Blade: Who the hell are you people?!Patrick Star: Who are you people?!
- Though Jeremy loves the movie, he does point out its pacing problems:
- This:Deckard: Replicants are like any other machine.Jeremy: That's replicant-ist.
Blade Runner 2049
- "In an attempt to answer the question, 'how much fog is too much fog', movie answers with THERE'S NEVER ENOUGH FOG!!!
- "Damn, K just had his Repli-cock blocked."
- Jeremy points out the continous Coca-Cola Product Placement, leaving him to wonder if they won the Franchise Wars like Taco Bell.
- This exchange.Bald Archivist: My mom still cries over the lost baby pictures.
K: Well it's a shame you... must've been adorable.
Jeremy: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. [Sin Counter goes down by 1]
- Jeremy notes that there STILL isn't any L.A traffic.
- "Since this is San Diego, I'm guessing this is the dystopic future of Comic-Con."
- Over a shot of slaves building machine parts:
The Bourne Supremacy
The Bourne Ultimatum
The Bourne Legacy
- This:CIA Agent: I want to know everything about everyone at every time.Jeremy: Facebook.
- Jeremy throws up after a shot continuously rotates.
- Jeremy claims a background painting looks like "Gandalf teaching Frodo how to play the violin".
- During an interrogation scene:CIA Agent: Where'd you find that information?
Jeremy: I wonder if Coke or Adidas ran any ads in front of that video. If so, we need to tell them that their brands are running preroll ads in front of damning spy evidence. Or better yet, the CIA can put a copyright claim on the video.
- Jeremy calls out the movie for its frequent location changes.
- This bit:Marta: You pack in the genetic mutations, infect the body and the vectrons load into the body..
Jeremy (sounding genuinely impressed): Ohhhhhhhhh. OK.
- This:Jeremy I would honestly remove 100 sins if Aaron woke up from his coma and turned into Matt Damon.
- During a particularly incomprehensible chase sequence, Jeremy is so confused, his only reponse is a Flat "What.".
The Conjuring 2
- Jeremy calls out the movie for failing to provide subtitles for a clearly foreign language. The language in question? British English.
- The demon turns a cross upside-down:Jeremy: Oh, she's being haunted by Saint Peter.
- "Yeah, let's take my son who is deathly afraid of bats to his first opera, featuring bats."
- The kid that Batman meets (and rescues) at several points in the movie is always called either 'that kid' or King Joffrey.
The Dark Knight
The Dark Knight Rises
- When Bane kills Daggett: "Bane tickles a man to death off-screen."
- "Bane hits air but Batman goes down."
- "This is not Batman, this is a p*ssy in a Batman costume."
- Jeremy apparently can't understand a thing Bane says."What?!"
- "Ooh, is that a Galaxy Note(TM)?" *ding* "Well it's Batman's Galaxy Note(TM) now." *ding*
- "This guy falls down for no reason." (This one eventually became a T-shirt.)
- "Batman gets pick-pocketed."
- "Bane does an Adam Sandler impression."Bane: Gotham is yours!
- The way Bruce's back is healed:"And that, folks, is the basis of chiropractic medicine."
- Jeremy's reaction to Jonathan Blake revealing that his legal first name is actually Robin."Oh, give me a f*cking break!"
- The sentence - Neck Snap (followed by unnecessary Wilhelm Scream).
- When Zod is about to be exiled from Krypton, during the infamous "I will find him" sequence. Let's just say that the sequence's yelling + Jeremy's hate for yelling = Hilarity.Zod: I will find him.
Jeremy: Okay, whatever you say.
Zod: I will find him.
Jeremy: Got it.
Zod: I will find him, Lara.
Jeremy: (annoyed) Dude!
Zod: I WILL FIND HIM!
Jeremy: Oh, for f*ck's sake.
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice
- During the opening credits, a "An Atlas Entertainment/Cruel and Unusualnote Production" credit appears on screen:Jeremy: I guess they DID try to warn us at the beginning...
- The next sin, a credit saying "A Zack Snyder film" is sinned without comment.
- Early on, a young Bruce Wayne screams as he sees his parents get murdered. Despite the fact that there's no audio, Jeremy still adds a sin for a Big "NO!".
- "Using Neil deGrasse Tyson for your own personal projects."
- This:Lex: God vs man.Jeremy: Oh, come on!
- Jeremy points out just how much of an Idiot Plot Lex's plan is before suddenly going off on a small rant about a date he got stood up on.Jeremy: WE HAD PLANS, MELISSA!!
- When Lex is discovered sitting in the red pool in the Kryptonian Ship:Jeremy: Chili's Ready!
- Batman is groaning after being hit by Superman:Jeremy: The Wayne in pain chooses mainly to complain.
- The stinger has the gathering of Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman accompanied by the intro to Super Friends.
- Jeremy mistakes Jai Courtney as Captain Boomerang for Tom Hardy.
- During the Pentagon scene.Amanda: I want to build a team of some very bad people who can do some good.
Jeremy: "NO"...The End.
- Jeremy on the Title Drop that Deadshot makes:Jeremy: This is the most roll-creditsing roll credits that has ever creditsed.
- The bar sceneDeadshot: Well we almost pulled it off.Jeremy: No, you f*cking didn't. You killed a bunch of bubbly monsters and briefly rescued a psychopath that is going to put you right back in prison. That's not pulling it off. That's participating in a s*itty LARP.
- During the beach battle:Antiope: (sees a German soldier about to shoot a distracted Diana) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (jumps on the way of the bullet)Diana: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!Jeremy: No. No.
- "Go drunk, movie. You're home."
- When Diana discovers that Sir Patrick is actually Ares:Jeremy: F*cking told you. Shock of all shocks.
- Jeremy complains how the supposedly-hidden-forever Themyscira gets quickly discovered by the Germans pursuing Steve, claiming that people like Magellan or Vasco da Gama should have came across the island years ago.
- When Diana pulls Steve out of the water:Jeremy: Discount From Here to Eternity.
- When Diana walks upon a fully nude Steve bathing:Diana: Would you say you're a typical example of your sex?Jeremy: Movie's got dick jokes, yo.
- In the same scene, Steve tries to describe his watch to Diana, while still nude:Steve: Good thing it's still ticking.Diana: You let this little thing tell you what to do?Jeremy: We are still talking about the watch, right?
- "DC Comics" *ding*
- The "drive-thru" joke, introducing audiences to the jokey Batman of the Joel Schumacher films.
- His lament over Billy Dee Williams not reprising his role of Harvey Dent from the Tim Burton films.
- "Joel Schumacher Dutch Angles the SH*T out of this downtown crime scene. This ain't your big brother's Batman, folks."
- Jeremy's joke on Chase Meridian's face upon seeing Batman descend out of nowhere:Jeremy: The director said "Nicole, just make the face you made the first time you saw Tom Cruise's bank account balance."
- The hilariously panicky bank security guard and his over the top reactions to everything from Two-Face's boiling acid trap ("OH NO! *ding* IT'S BOIIIIIILING ACIIIID!") to Batman borrowing his hearing aid to listen for Two-Face ("HEY! THAT'S MY HEARING AID!") It's actually enough that Jeremy hopes the guy doesn't make it out alive.Jeremy: You ever watch a movie with a victim you actually hope doesn't make it?
- Chase getting a ... feel of Batman's batsuit. And her reaction.Jeremy: That just happened. In a goddamn Batman movie.
- Edward Nygma, post whacking a guy over the head with a coffee jug.
- Jeremy points out Riddler's already supervillain-esque real name of "Edward Nygma." Bearing in mind that this was before it was changed to the less Narm-y "Eddie Nashton."Jeremy: My parents knew I would need a Riddler-esque name when I was born so...
- The Nightwing joke when Alfred inspects Dick Grayson's old circus helmet and sees a robin painted on the front (the bird, not Dick's superhero identity.)Alfred: Is this ... a robin?
Jeremy: Nope, it's a Nightwing, but those things get confused from time to time.
- The R insignia on Robin's armour.Batman: "R." What's that for?
Jeremy: A word no one's allowed to use anymore after Tropic Thund-
Jeremy: Ohhhhhh, right. It's that. It's Robin.
- The Stinger mocking Bruce Wayne temporarily giving up the cape and cowl with Peter Parker claiming "I am Spider-Man no more."
Batman: The Killing Joke
- When Batman shows up with a cup of coffee for Batgirl, Jeremy admits curiosity to what the conversation was like when he purchased it. One can't help but be reminded of a certain scene from Justice League where Batman buys coffee.
- The start of the infamous sex scene
- Jeremy: Batgirl defeats Batman?!?! What the hell is going on.. (Batgirl kisses Batman) WHAT THE F*CK?!
- In the gag reel...Comissioner Gordon: Oh, god. Oh, god!
Batman: It's okay. Let it come.
Comissioner Gordon: Um, phrasing?
Batman & Robin
- The title: "Everything Wrong With 'Batman & Robin' in an Awful Lot of Minutes"
- "Joel Schumacher." *ding* "Also, Film." *ding*
- "Did you ever want to know how much of an ego Arnold Schwarzenegger has? His name appears before the guy who plays Batman."
- "So Freeze's escape plan was to turn his car into a rocket, launch out of the museum through the tiny skylight, climb to 30,000 feet and then exit the rocket ... leaving it to crash and destroy all of Gotham while Freeze gently glides ... back to the same museum ... in the heart of Gotham?" *ding*
- This response to an early line from Batman:Batman: This is why Superman works alone.
"Really? What was all that Justice League sh*t then?" [Ding]
- In response to Mr. Freeze's "What killed the dinosaurs?" quip:
- "How did Clooney ever see straight with his head bobbing like this? The guy looks like he's in a constant for A Night at the Roxbury."
- Jeremy's reaction to the Bat-Credit Card. It's quite like The Nostalgia Critic's yet worlds apart due to Jeremy's usual tone."Why does the card have a sound effect? It's a f*cking credit card. Are we suddenly in a kung fu movie?" *ding* "Also, Bat-Credit Card."
- The Stinger punctuating the thawing of Gotham with "Here Comes The Sun"
- Another Stinger joke: Barbara meets Max Headroom.
Batman: Under The Red Hood
- Jeremy immediately calls out Ah Guhl for partnering with The Joker, noting that "if he wanted a less crazier and zanier partner, he should have gone with Condiment Man or Kite Man".
- On The Joker's voice actor note :
- "No wonder Gotham City has so much crime. They spend all their money on dirigibles."
- This bit:Henchman: It's called Amazo!Jeremy: I know it's from the comics but, really? Amazo? Why not Impressiv-o? Neat-o? Coolio? Oh wait.
- This:Nightwing: It has all the weaknesses of a human being!Jeremy: So, an addiction to Oreos and pornography, then?
- Jeremy getting angrier and angrier at all the As You Know and Info Dumping, even telling R'as if Everyone Knew Already, why Parrot Exposition?Jeremy: Is one of Nightwing's superhero aliases Captain Obvious?
- Jeremy repeatingly calls out Red Hood for not killing Batman when he has the chance.
- This bit:Nightwing: Not to belabor a point-Alfred: And yet, that is all you seem to do.Jeremy: Alfred would be exemplary at Cinemasins.
- This:Red Hood: Are you afraid at facing your greatest failure? Or is it that I'm a better Batman than you?Jeremy: This is what Christian Bale says to George Clooney all the time.
- The final sin:Batman: This changes nothing.Jeremy: Then why'd you make a movie about it then?!
Justice League: Dark
- After the traditional DC Comics sin, we get:Title Card: WASHINGTON D.C.Jeremy: DC, the city. Look, it's a perfectly fine place but the brand DC taints everything with those initials! Direct current, AC/DC, disco cowboys and magicians from Vegas that made the Statue of Liberty disappear.
- At a shot of a dimly lit warehouse:Jeremy: Justice League: Saw!
- This bit:Demon: Yeah, not one bit! Eheheheheheh!Jeremy: Demon #3 here must have watched Karate Kid all the time and wanted to be the "get a body bag" guy of the DC Comics universe.
- Jeremy's hilarious retort to a threat:Demon: Your ass is grass, Constantine!Other demon: Yeah, and we're the lawnmower!
- This bit:Bystander:Zatanna and Batman? What the hell?!
Jeremy: Huh, they put in the actual pitch of this movie!
- Jeremy is left speechless at the literal toilet monster in the movie.
- Jeremy actually ends up removing a sin at Batman grunting in confusion over it, noting that he's feeling the same as the audience.
- This:Death: The single most powerful conduit of evil known throughout the world-
Jeremy: Auto-playing Youtube ads?
- "You know you don't have to use magic for literally everything, Constantine?! Coincidentally, "Wizard and asshole extraordinaire" is also what's on my business card. Actually, it's "Wizard and asshole extraordinaire, bitch!" because I love The Social Network...what was I saying now?"
- Jeremy gets so pissed off at the magic asspulls that he adds 50 sins.
- This:Commissoner Gordon: The Justice League are on their way...
- One of the outtakes:Demon: You'll pay for this, Constantine!Other demon: YOUR SOUL WILL BE OURS!
Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox
- Jeremy continously refers to Captain Atom as "Canada-Man" throughout the video.
- "Clark Kent is a super-dick."
- Throughout the video, Jeremy is continuously wondering why nobody is caring about the fact that Zod and his henchmen killed two astronauts after they were freed.
V for Vendetta
- He sees Evey in a schoolgirl outfit when she's sent to seduce the Pedophile Priest. Jeremy removes five sins for it.Priest: I love the confessional game. "Tell me your sins."Jeremy: Anywhere But Here. Where the Heart Is. The Star Wars prequels. No Strings Attached. Those Thor movies...
- He does, however, point out how hilariously stupid it is that she managed to flee from the priest's apartment to Stephen Fry's apartment while wearing that highly conspicuous outfit.
- When the movie's climax hits, this Logic Bomb gets dropped.Jeremy: So, in Batman Begins we wanted Batman to stop the train because Ra's Al Ghul wanted to blow up Wayne Enterprises and a corrupt Gotham. In this movie, we don't want the train to stop because V wants to blow up Parliament and a corrupt London. If Batman had shown up in this movie and told V, "You have to believe in the people of London," would V be the bad guy? Chew on that, movie revisionists.
- There is something inherently funny about the fact that Jeremy chose to watch the nearly three-hour long extended edition of the film.
- "Okay, let's run 'em down... black-haired Black Widow, Pussy Wing Dude, Discount Cap, Blind Squirrel, Old Man Paperwork, Cigar Bastard, Mrs. Cigar Bastard, and The Hangman. What a fearsome crew."
- Jeremy's frustration with having to deal with Doctor Manhattan's ass and penis.Jeremy: Giant blue ass will not prepare you for all the blue nudity you're about to consume in this movie.
- Jeremy announces that he is critiquing the "Special Edition" of this movie:"What the hell was wrong with the original movie that made it not 'special' enough for me as a kid? I feel like my whole youth is in question here."
- In response to the Prince answering the door, revealing the beggar woman with the rose in a winter storm...Jeremy: Okay, first of all, why is the Prince answering the castle door? I know for a fact that he has like 300 servants. *ding* Second, it's impressive that there's a stained-glass portrait of EVERY scene in this interaction with the old woman. *ding* Third, the background looks more like a thunderstorm than a snowstorm, so I'm immediately calling bulls*it on the old woman's story, and gotta agree with Prince Teen Wolf on this one. *ding*
- When the beggar woman is revealed as an enchantress who punishes the Prince by turning him into the Beast...
- Jeremy questions the terms of the spell via the enchanted rose, "which would bloom until [the Prince's] 21st year":Narrator: If he could learn to love another, [...] then the spell would be broken.
Jeremy: He's gotta fall in love by the time he's 21?!?! Jesus, even by fairy tale standards that's pretty f*cking young. What if he wanted to backpack in Europe for a year, or volunteer with Greenpeace before settling down?
Narrator: If not, he would be doomed to remain a Beast for all time.
Jeremy: But it ALSO sounds like the enchantress made the Prince immortal, so... it's not THAT bad of a deal. With the way this chick goes around arbitrarily handing out punishments, it's pretty likely she ALSO did this to a princess, so at some point they would probably end up finding each other and living together forever as two pretty compatible, immortal beasts, especially after Tinder is invented.
- At one point, Jeremy defends the Beast for becoming the way he is with this:Jeremy: I'm not saying that excuses [the Beast] for being a kidnapping temper case, but he clearly had few positive role models in his life. Just a horny candle, a clock who won't disagree with him, and a teapot who ignores 19 of her 20 children.
- In response to Gaston's Disney Villain Death:
- This line:"Man, you do not want to be on the receiving end of a Lumiere climax after he's been pent up for ten years."
- In one of the stingers, the bit where Cogsworth mentions the tapestries of the castle is dubbed over by a certain quote from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.
Big Hero 6
- "DPIX Comics."
- All the jokes about how BH6 is (unintentionally or not) stealing from other movies.
- "Well, at least one animated film with a 'good cop, bad cop' character got nominated for an Oscar."
- "Jesus, can we wait until we get home for this lecture?" The funny part is that Jeremy sins this without further quotation.
- At one point, Jeremy asks who started the fire that killed Tadashi, then promptly says that the Billy Joel music can be cued while we figure this out. "We Didn't Start the Fire" promptly plays in the background. After thinking that Callaghan did because he knew that the microbots would protect him as he birthed his revenge scheme, he then says, "You gotta have faith, so you can cue George Michael now." Michael's "Faith" plays immediately from there.
- The countless jokes about how the mice subplot takes up too much of the film.
- "Story of Cinderella becomes a Tom and Jerry cartoon."
- "It's hard to believe that an hour and fourteen minute movie had so little story that it needed THIS much mouse plot!!"
- "This movie should just be called Mice."
- "I would have removed all the sins from this movie, plus any remaining ones left in the feature, if the needle had stabbed this mouse in the head."
- "If you cut out all the mouse footage of this movie, you'd literally be left with a fourteen-minute short film."
- [As Gus spills the corn he's finally managed to gather] "What a DUMBASS."
- One of the stingers is overlaying "Baby Got Back" over the stepsisters' poofy-skirt dresses as they leave to go to the ball.
- "Apparently, even in whatever castle-era this is, dudes' anacondas didn't want none unless they had buns, hon."
- From the scene when the mice are sewing Cinderella's dress:
- Perla: "Leave the sewing to the women."Jeremy: "She said it, I didn't."
- The chocolate gag.Anna: ♫I want to stuff some chocolate in my face♫
Anna and Elsa: Chocolate...!Jeremy: Haha, you women and-*ding*
- It comes back later on, during the ball scene:
- Adventures in Audio — Frozen, proving that you can make almost any scene dirty with some well-timed bleeps.
- "This movie is like a family-friendly version of The Grey. Too bad Liam Neeson isn't here to beat someone to death over a f**king billfold."
- Jeremy calls BS on Kristoff clinging to the edge of a snow-covered cliff and trying to climb up over it while wearing gloves:"Even when you're a cartoon, you should be dead. [...] At the very least, do like Wile E. Coyote and crash into the bottom of the canyon with a satisfying poof."
- Jeremy continuously calls out Arendelle's lack of security. It starts out with Anna leaving the palace alone on the day of Elsa's coronation..."This is a princess, right? Heir to the f*cking throne?! Not one person guarding her, or ... keeping an eye on her? This kingdom is run by f*cking idiots!"
- Then, when Anna leaves the castle alone to search for Elsa, leaving Hans in charge in her absence..."With a kingdom that plays things this loosey-goosey, you'd think some other kingdom would have long ago taken over this place. It's not like anyone's actually in charge of anything here."
- Then, when Hans goes off to search for Anna and asks for volunteers to help him..."But who are you going to leave in charge of Arendelle?"
- A variation on this occurs near the end, after Hans] is defeated and the guards all cheer..."These assholes had no idea Hans had turned evil. That all happened down at the ice lake, in the middle of the blizzard they couldn't see through... but hey, the princess just punched a dude, so, yuk it up everyone!"
- Then, when Anna leaves the castle alone to search for Elsa, leaving Hans in charge in her absence...
- When Elsa finishes singing "Let It Go"...Jeremy: So... is she empowered now? Or is she the villain now?
- Another song-based one:Anna: ♫ Arendelle's in deep, deep, deep, deep... snow... ♫
Jeremy: Now that's just musical cheating!
- When the Grand Pabbie troll says that "only an act of true love can thaw a frozen heart", Jeremy's response is a sarcastic "OH MY GOD!"
- When Hans leaves Anna to freeze to death...Anna: You won't get away with this.
Hans: Oh, I already have.
- The moment when Anna saves Elsa's life...Elsa: You sacrificed yourself for me?
Anna: I love you.
Jeremy: If Maureen Johnson is suggesting to Veronica Mars what I think she is... then that beats my fan fiction and rough sketches.
- At the end, Jeremy thinks that this movie and Tangled started out as the exact same script, since both movies have "an island kingdom, a long-unseen princess locked away, horse/reindeer playfulness, [and a] wild-scoundrel love interest".
- Several moments in the post-review stinger:
- As the trolls sing "Fixer Upper", the theme from Fraggle Rock is heard instead.
- During Elsa singing "Let it go"...
- During the scene with the shipwreck that killed the parents:
The Jungle Book
- The film's production manager is named Don Duckwall, prompting Jeremy to wonder if, with a name like that, he had no choice but to work at Disney.
- At the appearance of baby Mowgli:Jeremy: So... basically... Moses without the "mom dropping him off" portion of the story?
- "Does Raksha think she is going to nurse this human baby? I'd like to see how that works — actually, I take that back."
- This...Bagheera: (to Mowgli) Shere Khan has returned to this part of the jungle, and he has sworn to kill you.
Jeremy: He has? He's sworn to kill a man-cub he doesn't even yet know exists?
- "[Mowgli]'s been getting regular haircuts. With bangs!"
- When Kaa shows up, voiced by Sterling Holloway, there's this:Jeremy: Disney's then-propensity to re-use voice actors led to so much childhood confusion. Like, why is Winnie-the-Pooh evil now?
- The final sentence for the movie is "trampled by elephants", while "Pink Elephants on Parade" plays in the background.
- The "Pink Elephants" song carries over into the set of stingers, the first of which is a shot of Colonel Hathi's parade.
The Lion King
- The video description acknowledging the viewer's expected Oh No You Didn't! response.
- Jeremy theorizes that Timon murdered a family of four to be living in exile with Pumbaa.
- Timon eats a bug:
- "Sentence: Dethroned" (The Rains of Castamere plays)
- The "Nants Ingonyama" stinger gag coming full circle by showing the famous sunrise, yet with the sound replaced with "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING VIETNAM!"
- In the opening, after Maui swipes the heart of Te Fiti...Tala: Maui tried to escape, but was confronted by another who sought the heart...
Jeremy: (singing to "You're Welcome") What can I say, it's ex-position!!
- This:Tala: (addressing the children, including young Moana) ...until every one of us is devoured by the bloodthirsty jaws of INESCAPABLE DEATH!!!
(all the children, except Moana, react in terror)
Jeremy: Annnd that's how grandma got fired as the daycare teacher.
- Jeremy compares Tui's overprotection of Moana to Marlin's overprotection of Nemo and criticizes this movie for trying to sneak such a recycled cliche past him.
- Throughout the video, Jeremy removes a sin for every time Heihei the chicken, voiced by Alan Tudyk, appears.
- Jeremy calls out the movie for false-starting Moana's seagoing adventure that is going to happen anyway and remarks, "Jesus, it's my wedding night all over again."
- This, as Maui intendeds to eat Heihei:
- Jeremy describes the ocean that helps Moana at every turn as "an ex-machina, fate, God, love, and irony... all rolled into one giant cop out."
- This part with Grandmother Willow.Grandmother Willow: Your mother asked me the very same question.Pocahontas: What did you tell her?Grandmother Willow: To listen...Jeremy: Then she died.
- The Call-Back to their Grinch video, which was uploaded two days before.Kingdom is great at finding hidden flowers, but not so much at hidden towers. Dammit, Grinch! *ding*
- The Running Gag of the "Eat an apple to look like an a-hole" sin is used a lot in this video:
Flynn: With Maximus, crime in the kingdom disappeared almost overnight [ ] as did most of the apples.
- When Rapunzel and Flynn head off on the boat at the lantern festival, Maximus eats 14 apples, "to make him look like 14 assholes."
- At the end:
Jeremy: Because he's an asshole.
- Jeremy getting carried away:Jeremy: Man, I hope she has promises to do me. I mean Cartoon-Do Wait- Sh*t. I mean I want to squeeze 'em!
- When Terk plays around with a typewriter:Terk: Ha ha ha ha! Ding!
- Jeremy's reaction to Tantor using his trunk as a periscope:Jeremy: F*cking f*ck you, movie, you f*cking f*cknut asshole dickweed!
Wreck It Ralph
- At the opening:Wreck-It Ralph: Hi, my name's Ralph.Jeremy: Narralphtion!
- This:Wreck-It Ralph: I'M GONNA WRECK IT!Jeremy: This is what I used to say before ruining sex for my girlfriend.
- Jeremy calls out that Zangief is considered a bad guy and makes the suggestion to replace him with Dhalsim instead because:Jeremy: F*cking Dhalsim.
- The Running Gag of Jeremy continuously explaining how arcades died out in real life due to poor business decisions.
- Jeremy is upset at Q-Bert's appearance because "Q-Bert was the most infuriating game ever made."
- This bit:King Candy: Have some candy!Jeremy: Casual cannibalism.
- Jeremy calls out the Mentos and Diet Coke reference and warns future movie producers to "not reference a fleeting viral video in your timeless animated movie."
- "Konami Code Pandering! Want to get a bunch of nerds excited about something in your movie?! Show them the Konami Code! It's like a secret handshake for...everyone who's ever played Contra and nobody else!"
- Jeremy declares the movie's depiction of hacking to be even worse than the movie Hackers.
- Jeremy sins Twizzlers for no reason.
- Jeremy compares King Candy to Agent Smith, then goes on a long tangent about the nature of Agent Smith against Neo, completely forgetting about Wreck-It Ralph as the film plays.
- Jeremy's reaction to Ralph's "I'm Bad, And That's Good" speech? Calling it a "Discount Iron Giant 'Superman' moment".
- The movie's sentence is "Sent to the Atari burial site", complete with the digitised E.T. theme from the infamous Atari 2600 game.
- One of the outtakes:King Candy: Our next racer is...Hingle McKringleberry: Hingle McKringleberry! From Penn State University!
- After Yax mentions the license plate number to Judy:Jeremy: Tommy Chong yak actually got the license plate number despite being a Tommy Chong yak. *ding*
- Assistant Mayor Bellwether: "Oh, mutton chops".Jeremy: A sheep saying this is equivalent to a person saying, "Oh, meaty rib cage." *ding*
- The way the "Walt Disney Pictures Presents" logo zooms out...Jeremy: Well, someone saw the Harry Potter movies.
Jeremy: "[Name of Harry Potter actor] further proof I am watching a Harry Potter movie."
- It turns into a Running Gag as the various actors who performed in this movie had also performed in the Harry Potter movies (i.e., Alan Rickman as Absolem, Helena Bonham Carter as the Red Queen, Timothy Spall as Bayard), which Jeremy points out every single time:
- He also references a Harry Potter game in the case of Stephen Fry as the voice of the Cheshire Cat.
- Alice asks a pair of twins if their mother knows if they swim naked in a pond, which prompts this remark:Jeremy: OOOOHHHHH snap! Where is the footage of that? I mean, she totally owned them right there, right? I mean, assuming there's verifiable footage of said naked swimming. You know... for science.
- This:Alice: You could always paint the roses red.
Lady Ascot: What an odd thing to say!
- Jeremy points out how everyone at the engagement party all are dressed the same range of colors:"This is some otherworldly color-coordination for this engagement party — or are you saying the entire kingdom only has the range of white-to-sky-blue to choose from?! And if so... WHY?!"
- This, as a shrunken Alice struggles vainly to reach a table:Dodo: You would think that she would remember all of this from the first time.
Jeremy: Wonderland creature would be amazing at CinemaSins.
- Response to a candy with the phrase "Eat me":"Now see... that's just an insult right there!"
Alice Through the Looking Glass
- Once again, Jeremy ridicules the "Walt Disney Pictures Presents" text for the same reason as the first Alice movie:"Walt Disney rips off Warner Brothers' Harry Potter font, because... why the hell not?"
- "Pirates of the Caribbean 9: The Alice Chronicles."
- As Alice reaches her hand into the mirror, Jeremy remarks, "This might as well be a roll credits here, I think."
- Jeremy is confused by Alice's tiny size when she falls out the open midair door and lands in a flowerbed in Wonderland, which is normal-sized, so he decides to just add on two sins to this movie and moves on. Cue two dings.
- Jeremy notices that Alice's clothes shrank with her body, which prompts this remark:"No one wants to see Alice naked except for... calculating... calculating... 40% of this movie's audience! Wait... what?!"
- When Sacha Baron Cohen is introduced as Time, Jeremy is so appalled that he decides to add on 45 sins to the entire scene inside the clock tower, which he denounces as "a huge time-wasting MacGuffin of f*ckery." He then proceeds to a do a sped-up version of the sins featured herein. As there are 45 sins thus far, the next 45 sins added on result in 90 sins altogether thus far.Jeremy: (as he fast-forwards through this scene) Oh, man, that's bad... (as Alice and Time interact) Oh, remember that? (as Time points to the clock on his chest) I'm glad we're fast-forwarding this... (the sound of food crunching is heard — maybe it's potato chips or something)
- At the end of the video, the sins in the clock tower scene are featured again, this time at normal speed. One example:Alice: (to Time about the Mad Hatter) Our friend is in mortal danger!
Jeremy: But, like, why? Nothing actually happened to make him ill. There was no curse or spell, no physical ailment. He basically threw a temper tantrum and changed his physical appearance. That's not mortal danger, that's going goth.
- Also, when Time meets the Red Queen...Jeremy: Of COURSE the time guy Alice needs help from is in love with the main antagonist from the last movie. Because of course he is. Of course!
- Also, when Time meets the Red Queen...
- At the end of the video, the sins in the clock tower scene are featured again, this time at normal speed. One example:
- As Mirana, the White Queen, puts all of Wonderland's hopes in Alice, Jeremy thinks that Anne Hathaway, who plays the White Queen, is the real villain in this movie."I don't mean Mirana, the White Queen, I specifically mean Anne Hathaway."
- As King Oleron addresses the people of Witzend, Jeremy is appalled:"Witzend?! Wit's End?!?! Really?! Are you TRYING to piss me off by describing me when watching this movie?!"
- This part when everything is been rust incluing the Chronosphere, then later it powers up as Jeremy ranting:
- One post-review stinger features several chess pieces and a broken Humpty Dumpty, while the "If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding" line from "Another Brick In The Wall" is heard.
Beauty and the Beast (2017)
- "This movie exists."
- The ice-cold tone of his voice when he says this adds to the humour.
- Jeremy immediately compares this movie to the 1998 Psycho remake.
- Eventually, he gets so fed up with the movie blatantly copying the animated version that he chooses to repeat some sins from said video instead of writing new ones.
- The fact that Jeremy is so scandalised by this movie that he never once uses the usual "Emma Watson is not my girlfriend in this scene" sin. Not Distracted by the Sexy indeed.
- He also sins the movie during the famous ballroom scene for somehow having worse camerawork in the exact same scene than a movie that doesn't even have cameras had.
- "This movie exists."
- "Movie decides to cast Game of Thrones' Richard Madden against type as a prince who falls in love with the wrong woman. Something tells me this won't end in a Red Wedding but I'd knock off a hundred sins if it did."
- The exasperation at Cinderella's mother's unexplained death. "What did she die of? Happiness?"
- "No fairies were harmed in the making of this scene, because well, she used a tree army, and presumably all the fairies are back at home chilling and playing Call of Duty" *ding*
- When King Stephen demands all the forgers be brought to him, the Narrator asks, " All of them? Are you sure you don't want to speak, like, the head forger or something?"
- "Tree dragon." *ding*
The Jungle Book (2016)
- Just like the above mentioned Beauty & The Beast and Cinderella, "This movie exists."
- This exchange:Mowgli: "You're kidding me?"
Jeremy: Movie character says to Bill Murray Bear what I am currently saying to movie.
- And this exchange:Baloo: "Winter is coming."
Jeremy: Discount Ned Stark is bear.
- The video description on YouTube:Jeremy: Jungle Book, Jungle Book, does whatever a Jungle Book does, which is sort of the problem.
Pete's Dragon (1977)
- During the opening credits, Jeremy puts the casting of this film in perspective by saying that this is equivalent to casting Miranda Lambert and famed 1970s child actor Kristy McNichol in the 2016 version.
- Also, when Red Buttons is credited as a character named Hoagy:"Look, if Red Buttons is playing a character named Hoagy, this movie is probably pretty awful. Just saying."
- Also, when Red Buttons is credited as a character named Hoagy:
- Jeremy describes the murderous Gogan clan as "the discount Beverly Hillbillies".
- When the Gogans start singing:
- Upon seeing the Gogans' clumsy dance number:Jeremy: Choreographed redneckery.
- Jeremy is so appalled by this film that, for the first time ever, he occasionally takes a break from sinning, pausing the movie and everything, to yell at his partner Chris for forcing him to watch it."Dude, have YOU seen this movie? I don't think so. I think you just put it on the schedule and assigned it to me because there's a remake coming. But this is some repugnant s*it, dude. And the worse it gets, the more I blame your ass. Just... FYI and s*it... asshole."
- He resumes the rant later, culminating in an outraged demand that Chris "stop screening my calls!"
- "Pete's Dragon, the fun family movie about cannibal hillbillies out to kill a mentally ill young boy! Can't imagine why this wasn't a hit."
- At one point, Jeremy decides to Watch It Stoned and audibly lights up a bong, while the theme to Breaking Bad plays in the background. It doesn't help.
- When Elliott first appears, Jeremy exclaims, "Who Framed Roger Rabbit... eat your heart out, bitches."
- Who Framed Roger Rabbit is referenced again in the climax of this film, when Doc Terminus attempts to kill Elliott with a harpoon, which Jeremy calls into question: "The only thing that could possibly kill Elliott is probably DIP. Or cancer."
- Learning that the dragon's name is Elliott, Jeremy remarks, "You sure you don't wanna try again? Drogon? Falkor? Toothless?"
- Jeremy calls out the red fruit suddenly turning purple when they turn animated when they're on Elliott's stomach: "That's an apple tree, not an apple-and-plum tree!"
- As Pete and Elliott eat the apples...Jeremy: The director said, "Take a bite of this apple, it'll make you look like even more of a red-headed asshole."
- As Pete and Elliott eat the apples...
- Pete sings to Elliott, while Jeremy complains loudly throughout:
- Pete: I look in your eyes and you whisper sweetly...♪
Jeremy: Kill me.
- "Uh... Was this song originally intended for another movie? About adults? In love?"
- "Also, two sh*tty songs inside 12 minutes means this movie is my enemy and I will attempt to kill it."
- This:Pete: (to a schoolgirl) You don't name girls Elliott.
Jeremy: That's racist.
- As Nora sings "Brazzle Dazzle Day":"'Disney using gibberish as the hook of the movie's upbeat song' cliche. A time-honored tradition."
- When the Gogan clan arrives in town, there's this:Gogan clansman: (to another clansman) You grab onto Pete while I grab onto her [Nora].
Jeremy: That's the second time I've gotten a pretty strong sexual assault vibe from this movie, so I'm just gonna add 5 sins for that being okay in a Disney movie in 1977. *+5 dings*
- When the mayor trips over the missing staircase:Mayor: When did I start losing control of my town?
- This bit in the video description.
- Jeremy pointing out the goofiness of Barry the bee's quasi-romantic relationship with a human female, culminating in:Vanessa: He happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time!
Ken: Are there other bugs in your life?!
Jeremy: This is an excellent, but unsatisfactorily-answered question. *ding*
- Jeremy's continuing annoyance with the bad and constant bee puns, notably:Barry: Larry, bees have never been afraid to change the world. I mean, what about Bee-Columbus, Bee-Gandhi... Bee-Jesus?
Jeremy: <sigh> *ding*
- This reaction to another one of the film's puns:Barry: Have you ever been stung Mr. Sting?
Jeremy: A f*cking Sting cameo??? Because his name is Sting??? And this is a movie about bees?!?! How did Jerry Seinfeld have any credibility after this movie?!?! *ding*
- Jeremy noticing that the byline on a newspaper article is 'Tom Jones', leading to a brief musical interlude. "It's not unusual to write articles for Variety..."
- One of the stingers is putting audio of Oprah Winfrey's "You get a car!" moment on a scene involving a character voiced by Oprah.
- This:Barry: Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white men!
[Points at four men, one of whom is black, who moves away slowly from the other men]
Jeremy: What??? *ding*
- Jeremy is so bored and disinterested that he fell asleep while sinning: "Zzzzzzz——-wha? what? Where? I didn't...oh, s*it's this is still going on?"
- This:Barry: (while banging on the window with full force repeatedly) Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This...
Jeremy: Barry enacts exactly how I feel watching this movie. *ding*
- During the last minute of the movie:Ken: WHEN WILL THIS NIGHTMARE END?!
Jeremy: I just checked, and thankfully only 21 seconds! *ding*
- When Adam asks Barry if a group of girl bees are their cousins too, Barry says they are distant cousins, prompting Jeremy to say "Alabama."
The Boss Baby
- This:Narrator: Did you know that the triangle is the strongest shape found in nature?
Jeremy: Somewhere, Phil Jackson is solemnly nodding.
- As Tim's parents sing "Blackbird"...Jeremy: Movie likely blows half its budget on licensing one Beatles song. They couldn't just bust out a Cyndi Lauper track or something? Can't imagine something like "Hole In My Heart" would've cost that much. Maybe two Snickers bars and a tube of lube? Not sure where I came up with that offer, but now I have some very weird cravings.
- During the beginning of the movie at the baby factory, we get this:
- "Tim is enrolled in the elementary division of the Prometheus School of Running Away From Things."
- Jeremy's reaction to a fart joke, where the lack of words says everything.Jeremy: "<sigh>" *ding*
- When "home" is said at the movie's beginning:
- Not more than 5 minutes in, Jeremy gets pissed at the poor quality of the movie:Boov Alien: We don't have time for parties.Jeremy: WHAT THE F*CK DO THESE ASSHOLES DO THAT REQUIRE ANY TIME WHATSOEVER?! WHAT THE F*CK EVEN ARE THESE THINGS?! WHAT THE F*CKING F*CK, MOVIE!
- As Oh complains about the music in the car, we get this:Jeremy: If Oh thinks THIS is bad, wait till she gets to Bitch Better Have My Money.
- This:Tip: I can't wait to tell my mom I've been to Paris!Jeremy:Yeah, she'll have a lot of fun telling that story to the rest of the enslaved human race!
- This part gets sinned with no explanation:Oh: I will now sing the Boov Death Song. (clears throat) AHHHHH— (ding)
How To Train Your Dragon
- Seeing as how this was the very first DreamWorks movie to be done, Jeremy shares his confusion about the opening logo.Jeremy: How is the DreamWorks Fishing Boy on the crescent part of the moon? The rest of the moon is still there, unless the Earth is gone and so is the other part of the moon.
- How does Jeremy see the way Hiccup is able to tame Dragons? Cheats.
- The Running Gag on how Hiccup flies Toothless too close to his village of vikings who live to kill dragons.
- One of the stingers being Hiccup showing Astrid around with "A Whole New World" playing in the background.
Kung Fu Panda
- This bit:Jeremy: Legend-legend-legendary-legend-legend. *ding*
- When Po states "Never before had a panda been so feared... and so loved", this is how Jeremy responds:Jeremy: Pandas in the past have set a pretty low bar for both of those. They mostly just sit around, eat bamboo, and don't have sex. *ding*
- Jeremy counting up how many times Jackie Chan talks as Monkey in the movie.
- This one about Po looking through an unexplained hole in the wall of the Jade Palace.
Kung Fu Panda 2
- This:Rabbit: One dumpling, please, Dragon Warrior size!(Ping lifts up an abnormally large dumpling and drops it on the counter.)Jeremy: The f*ck!? *ding*
- Jeremy complaining about the characters constantly pointing out the sins in the movie.Jeremy: Okay, if the characters in the movie can hear me, please stop sinning each other. I'm gonna run out of things to say!
- "Monkey continuing to be pointless. He's like the Ringo Starr of the Furious Five".
- The final stinger at the end:Soothsayer: Who you choose to be. Who are you, panda?Po: Superman.
Kung Fu Panda 3
- This:Po: Jade zombies?
Po, Monkey: Jombies!
Jeremy: Jombie- ah, they beat me to it. *ding*
- While Po is fighting off bad guys:Po: Don't worry dad, I do this every day.
Jeremy: The Valley of Peace gets attacked every day? Maybe they should change the name. *ding*
- As a ball flies through the air:Po: Grandma Panda, heads up!
(Ball hits old panda on the head)
Jeremy: Po killed Grandma Panda. *ding*''
- One of the stingers shows Oogway in the spirit realm, with a choir singing...
- "Clap-on heater."
- This sin:Marty: Grand Central Station! It's grand and it's central.
Jeremy: And it's a station. *ding*
- These two sin counts:Police Officer: (talking to speaker) Yeah, that's right, a zebra. Right in front of me. Can I shoot it?
Jeremy: America. *ding*
Police Officer: Can I shoot it?
Jeremy: Well, that depends if it's a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes. *ding*
- Jeremy goes out of his way to sin every poop or butt joke in the film.
- Jeremy also blasts the numerous pop culture references parodied or mentioned in the film.
- "Sexy Hippo ripoff of Fantasia. *ding* Plus an additonal sin for making me write the words "Sexy Hippo". *ding*
- At the beginning of the video:Jeremy: "Starting with the climax" cliche. Coincidentally, "Starting with the Climax" is the working title for my sextape. Coming soon...is the alternate title.
- Shortly after, he called him "Micromind".
- It's not that hard to spot any reference to Despicable Me.
Jeremy: All broadcasters east of the Mississippi River are required to have a "W" at the beginning. Like WMCP, or WJR, or WYMI still watching this discount Despicable Me?
- Like this one:
- Jeremy swears if Will Ferrell's narration goes on, he would be the one who becomes a supervillain.
- "Metro Man cares not for your puny human concepts, like safety, parental consent, or shaken baby syndrome."
- "Megamind would be diabolical at CinemaSins."
- This one.Tighten: There is no Easter Bunny...there is no Tooth Fairy.
Jeremy: Spoiler alert!
- At the beginning, the DreamWorks SKG logo has ogre ears and green skin on the two Ss, which Jeremy calls into question:"There are two Ks, two Es, and two Rs in this logo, but they don't get any special Shrek treatment. This logo is racist against, like, 80% of the qualified alphabet!"
- Throughout the film, Jeremy points out the amount of Toilet Humor in this subversive take on fairy tales.Jeremy: (after the second fart/poop joke in the movie, right at the start of the movie) ARE YOU [KIDS] NOT ENTERTAINED?!?!?
- Three minutes into the movie, Shrek belches to light a fire in his fireplace, to which Jeremy replies:
- As the wanted fairy tale characters are being sold off, Jeremy questions Pinocchio's being sold in particular:Jeremy: I know we're making fun of Disney here, but we're seriously gonna believe that Geppetto sells Pinocchio for 5 f*cking shillings? The witch got 20 pieces of silver, so [Geppetto] could totally get at LEAST 50 on the black market, especially since [Pinocchio's] face is plastered on a wanted poster.
- Jeremy compares Duloc to Disneyland and Lord Farquaad to Michael Eisner "in a movie made by a studio headed by Jeffrey Katzenberg", who was formerly with Disney. Based on that, Jeremy concludes that Shrek is equivalent to "an ex-girlfriend bitching about how lame and stupid her ex-boyfriend was, but secretly wants to get back with him."
- Jeremy questions why the dragon's castle, surrounded by a lake of lava, would have a suspension bridge across the lake to and from the castle:Jeremy: If you stole this castle, why not just burn the bridge? Is it for the pizza delivery guy?
- In the same vein:Jeremy: Looking at the impossible nature of this place, I wonder how they got supplies here so that Princess Fiona wouldn't die while being held captive?
- In the same vein:
- Jeremy questions the treasure stash in the dragon's castle...Jeremy: It's not like [the dragon is] gonna go to town and plop down $50 for a handbag.
- At Fiona's declaration of how ugly she is as an ogre.Jeremy: Yes, but only in an "I'm in an animated movie" way. If this were real life and she were into nitpicky assholes, I'd probably hit that.
- "On Demand Voyeur Porn."
- When the spell is broken, revealing Fiona's true form as an ogre, even though her parents are human, Jeremy questions why she couldn't stay human and "have a Kermit/Miss Piggy relationship."
- In one of the stingers:Fiona: Every night I become this, this horrible ugly beast!
- The fact that there's a brand new sin counter (it broke twice during The Fate of the Furious), which will likely remain for the rest of the series (at least, until it probably breaks again).
- The very first sin, in which Jeremy screams at the kid in the Dreamworks logo: "GO TO SCHOOL!!!!!!"
- "Also, the premise of Pixar's Up was surprisingly inspired by this Dreamworks logo in a Shrek movie."
- "These people are so bad at shooting, I'm surprised Donkey doesn't make a Stormtrooper reference."
- Jeremy is completely horrified that this movie was once the 3rd highest grossing movie of all time.
- As Shrek and Fiona kiss on the beach:Jeremy: Mike Myers invents a new Pornhub category calling "ogre-ing".
- "Mike Myers character gets hit in the balls: example number 392."
- This:Shrek: Donkey, think of the saddest thing that ever happened to you!
- When Shrek drinks the Happily Ever After potion which makes him fart loudly, Jeremy sins this with no comment.
- During the film's mid-credits scene where Donkey meets his own dragon-donkey hybrid children, Jeremy complains about now thinking "how a donkey gets his penis into a dragon vagina."
- In the scene where King Harold goes to the crowded bar to hire Puss in Boots, when he tells the barmaid that he wants Puss to kill an ogre and the noisy crowd all gasp at King Harold in silence.Jeremy: How the f*ck did they hear that?
Shrek The Third
- This bit:Prince Charming: Do you mind?!The Gingerbread Man: "Do you mind?!" BORING!Jeremy: The Gingerbread Man would later transform into a different creature, a Twitter troll.
- Jeremy is disgusted at literally every appearance of Donkey's kids.
- At the opening title:Jeremy: Movie misses the opportunity to be both honest and on-brand by calling this movie Shrek the Turd.
- This:Shrek: Better out then in, I always say.Jeremy: Yeah, you say that in EVERY F*CKING ONE OF THESE MOVIES!
- At a weed joke:Jeremy: Whoever wrote this scene fought tooth and bong to keep this joke in. Thanks, screenplay writer of Wild Wild West and Caddyshack 2!
- Jeremy gets so pissed off at the toilet humor and anachronisms, he adds 100 sins.
- This:The Gingerbread Man: All you'll be is the king of the stupids.Jeremy: This line is correct because this movie is marginally funnier than the 1996 Tom Arnold vehicle The Stupids. That is all.
- Jeremy actually tries bailing from the movie, only for the Sin Counter to demand he come back to finish it.
- This bit:Arthur: This is lame.Merlin: (Dope Slap) You're lame!
- This:Cyclops: (holding his one-eyed little daughter) Who'd ever think a monster like me deserves someone as special as you?Jeremy: Guys...help. I think I've been crushed by a heavy hand. ARGH!
- When Arthur holds up the crown:Jeremy: Hooray, someone we've never met or even know about is now our king!
- "This movie is like The Ant and The Grasshopper fable, only with glitter feces and clown corpses."
- "Wait, you're telling me there's only one Flurg restaurant in town but there are THREE Nar-Nar's?!"
- Jeremy's epic reaction to Branch's reason for being depressed:Branch: Because singing killed my grandma, okay?!Jeremy:: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Jeremy:: To what are we granting the reason for this emotional renaissance to Branch? Sure, he told that story about his singing getting his grandma murdered but...it doesn't...I mean...I'm sorry, that story is still so f*cking stupid!
- Later on, Jeremy calls back to his reaction:
- This bit:*Pots and pans pile onto Bridget*Jeremy: And Bridget is dead.
- This:Poppy: (to Branch) You don't sing, you don't dance, you're so gray all the time!Jeremy: That's graycist.
- "All the trolls have beautiful natural singing voices, but there's always one who has to Kanye it up."
- Poppy sings "The Sound of Silence" after Branch insists he's going to sleep:Jeremy: Poppy decides to behave like a literal troll to poor Branch.
- Jeremy ranting about Chef ambiguously acting as she knew who Lady Glitter Sparkles really was:Jeremy: Gristle only introduced Bridget as his plus one, so the only way Chef could know her name is if the screenwriters were committed to seeing Christine Baranski chew the hell out of her lines.
The Expendables 2
- Jeremy has a new one for his running gag of "In case you confused it with somewhere else"On Screen caption: Sindhupalchowk District, Nepal.Jeremy: Just in case you confused it with a place you can pronounce.
- The various jokes about the team's sex lives with their new powers.
- The Power Incontinence issues that plague the human-looking characters throughout the film.Jeremy: Johnny's powers should have melted the box he was in long before reaching 4000 degrees Kelvin, even 2000 degrees should've vaporized everyone in that building.Jeremy: Sue can contain a supernova-level firestorm despite not being able to hold a shield against Doom's electricity attack moments earlier.
- "Desperate scientist running out of time and funding tests crazy scheme on himself" cliché.
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer
- When Reed Richards notifies the Thing to not tell Sue or Johnny that he's building a machine in the middle of the city.Reed Richards: Don't tell Johnny.*Johnny immediately flies down from quite a distance away*Johnny Storm: Don't tell Johnny what?Jeremy: Nope. He didn't even come close to hearing that.
- "Reed is a dick to people in general."
- Reed: I stayed in and studied like a good little nerd. Fifteen years later, I'm one of the greatest minds of the twenty-first century.Homer Simpson: NEEERRRRD!!!!!!
Fantastic Four (2015)
- Seeing Michael B. Jordan and Reg E. Carthy (both actors from The Wire) play father and son reminds Jeremy of The Wire, which in turn makes him want to go watch it. In fact, Jeremy briefly stops making the video to go watch it.Title Card: GONE TO WATCH THE WIRE. *Will return in 60 hours.
- "Doctor Doom over here."Jeremy: Did you guys feel that? I think we were actually punched in the nose with obviousness. I'm actually bleeding.
- Jeremy goes on a rant and gives a sin for a character in a science fiction movie saying that something isn't possible. The next sin is him agreeing that it really shouldn't be possible.
- Jeremy's utter confusion that Doom's motivation is returning to Planet Zero and everyone trying to stop him.
- The usual Roll Credits gag fails due to the Title Drop being the last scene of the movie.
- ""Cliché villain is cliché" cliché."
- "Tyrese finally earns his paycheck in this movie!"
- As Roman is being arrested:Roman: What's this about, man?!
Jeremy: It couldn't be that time I shot at you 20 times, right?
- After a very predictable scene, Jeremy comments:Jeremy: "OH MAN! Movie just unleashed the Secret Cliché Prize Box! Tell 'em what they've won, Jeremy! Thanks, Jeremy. Movie, you have won an additional 10 sins for all the clichés in this movie!"
- This bit:Twinkie: This is DK's mountain.
- In a bit of a reversal... "Tyrese had to drag this movie into this, didn't he?"
- This conversation:Guard: (reading a fake ID by Tyrese) It says Caucasian!
Roman: It's a tan. You know a tan?
Jeremy: Jesus Christ. *ding*
- (During the scene where the toilets blow up) "Movie depicts exactly what's it like watching these movies." *ding*
- Early in the movie, someone is seen jumping from a speeding car on an elevated highway to a speeding car on a ground level highway.Jeremy: F*ck you. *ding*
- This scene during the climax:Luke: (jumps out of the moving airplane down to the moving jeep below him)
Jeremy: Double GODDAMMIT. *ding*
Letty: (jumps out of the moving airplane down to the moving jeep below her)
Jeremy: Triple GODDAMMIT. *ding*
- During the climax, when Dom manages to drive out of the exploding airplane through the nose:"The acceptance of sh*t like this is why we can't have good movies." *ding*
Letty, it's just a wreck that kills people. Dom will be fine
- In a moment before that:
- Already lots of sins for the scene with the tank, but then in the next scene the characters comment that the tank was 70 tons.Jeremy: Okay, so 70 tons? That tank's 70 tons were in any way slowed down or stopped by a f*cking Mustang? F*CK YOU IN THE EAR, MOVIE.
- The final comment:Jeremy: You can sit back and drink your Red Bull and blab all you want about how all these movies are escapist fun and you're not supposed to take them seriously, but I'm still gonna fuck your sister later tonight.
- Whenever Vin Diesel narrates, Jeremy gives us:
- "You just earned yourself a dance with the devil, boy."Jeremy: That line.
- Jeremy yells at Dom for calling The Incredible Hulk a "bad 70s show."Jeremy: That show RULED, so shut your whore mouth!
- "Hey look, in Tokyo they ALSO have unreasonably short skirts at car gatherings! We're not really so different after all!!"
- Jeremy suffers Sarcasm Failure when Dom drives his car off a cliff and is completely fine afterwards.
- Jeremy slaps an instant 1000 sins for the "jump from building to building" stunt in Abu Dhabi. And then gives the movie an extra "screw you" sin for being referred to as "the most critically acclaimed movie in the franchise".
- "Tonight, the part of Holly Holm will be played by Michelle Rodriguez."
- Very late in the video, when a parking lot caves in on Dom.Letty: DOM!!Jeremy: <sigh> Letty... just... he's fine.
- The fact that the sin counter added up to 1337, which is Leet Speak.Sentence: 6 Months On The Fury Road. note
- The "In X minutes" part of the title is changed to "<sigh>". Not "In <sigh> minutes", just "<sigh>".
- "Comcast." *ding* *ding* *ding* *ding* *ding*
- The "In X minutes" part of the title is changed to "GODDAMMIT."Jeremy: All right, let's get this sh*t over with...
- Jeremy making fun of the Cuban mile, and Cuban jokes in general:Jeremy: It's like a baker's dozen, only with empanadas instead of donuts.Jeremy: (After Letty says this is Cuban NOS) What's the difference between NOS and Cuban NOS? NOS is Nitrous Oxide, so if it were different it wouldn't be NOS, but some other compound entirely...Jeremy: It only needs to go a mile... ahem... A CUBAN MILE DOMJeremy: How have they already not gone the amount of distance I think a Cuban mile is?Jeremy: Yeah it's on fire. It's just Cuban fire.
- Once again, the franchise makes Jeremy suffer Sarcasm Failure. In this case, it involves showing Hobbs highly classified information at a little girls' soccer game.
- The movie is so terrible, Jeremy decides that Tyrese has not earned his paycheck.
- The torpedo scene exceeded such sin tolerance, the sin counter breaks.Jeremy: Goddamn! This scene... this scene just broke the f*cking sin counter!!
- Eventually, the sin counter glitches out and remains so for the rest of the video after another ridiculous and over-the-top scene plays...Jeremy: Are you OK?! Are you OK?! Help, Chris, the sin counter isn't breathing, man!Chris: I'll dial 911! (a heartbeat flatline sound is heard) Oh my God! (Chris starts sobbing uncontrollably) It's dead, isn't it? It's f*cking dead! WHY, GOD?! WHY?!? TAKE ME!!
- This scene in particular also sounds like Jeremy is Corpsing during his saddening rant.
- The final sin count is "R.I.P." (also glitching; the actual sin count is 175), and the sentence is "Chop Shop", which is accompanied by the The Dude saying, "Well, they finally did it. They killed my f*cking car."
- Eventually, the sin counter glitches out and remains so for the rest of the video after another ridiculous and over-the-top scene plays...
- (During the credits for actress Dakota Johnson and director Sam Taylor-Johnson) "Haha, Johnson!" *ding*
- "The guy (Christian Grey) may have a big dick, but he also IS a big dick. Dick." *ding*
- Jeremy compares the fact that the book came from Twilight fan-fiction to recycling the action from the shock video, 2 Girls 1 Cup.
- The first scene in the hardware store.Anastasia: Maybe coveralls, so you could protect your clothes?
Christian: Could just take all my clothes off.
Jeremy: What a whore. *ding*
- "Movie that promised me kinky sex has gone over 23 minutes without offering up any kinky sex." *ding*
- "Wow, even the "Bella lip-bite" is lifted from Twilight! Does this movie have one single f*cking thing to offer me that is original, besides the kinky sex which, incidentally, still hasn't shown up at the 30 f*cking minute mark?!" *ding*
- Jeremy comparing the film unfavorably to other "Pacific Northwest" movies like Sleepless in Seattle and Singles.
- "BDSM isn't open during business hours." *ding*Christian: You're biting your lip.
Jeremy: Christian Grey would be excellent at Cinema-Sinning Twilight movies. *ding*
- Jeremy marks waiting 43 minutes for the "kinky sex". *ding* And two full minutes of disrobing. *ding*
- Jeremy wonders if watching this at the premiere was awkward for Dakota Johnson's parents, Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith.
- "Of course, she's a movie virgin, so this is the best sex ever had by a virgin in the history of first times. It's not painful and she has 15 G-spots." *ding*
- Jeremy complains about not getting to see Christian's junk, considering the other content in this film.
- Jeremy mentioning "dragging" certain actors and actresses into this film.
- "Movie characters will now send a series of texts and IMs to each other on-screen because clearly the actors revolted when asked to repeat too many words from the script. *ding*
- "Movie goes full 'Passion of the Christ', which my penis was not prepared for." *ding*
- "I think this movie could have been finished in 30 seconds. 'Anastasia.' 'Christian.' 'You want me to f*ck you and whip you?' 'No.' The End." *ding*
- The end.Christian: Ana.
Anastasia: Christian. (elevator closes)
Jeremy: I'm glad they could get that straight at the end of the movie. *ding*
Fifty Shades Darker
- "Dull movie calls Portland dull, and I'm ready to give it 50 sins out of spite. Hell, Portland, TENNESSEE is less dull than this movie. They're proud and progressive, I hear".
- The scene in which Marcia Gay Harden's character slaps the character of Kim Basinger is dubbed "Oscar-on-Oscar violence".
Fifty Shades Freed
- One of the outtakes:Jack Hyde: I could have been Christian Gray!Fredo Corleone: I can handle things! I'm smart!
- This bit of commentary:Jack: Hey, hey, this is no dream.Jeremy: Hey, hey! Sure can't wait to hear Danny and the Juniors tonight at the sock hop!
- The Running Gag of "Movie kills the cutest woman X amount of minutes in."
- Jeremy's honest distress when the counselors' strip Monopoly game is interrupted.
- The Rule of Three coming into play:(shot of Ned dancing wearing a feather headdress)'Jeremy: That's racist.Officer: (to the girls) Hey, can it, Cochise.Jeremy: That's racist.Officer: (to Ned) I told you to sit on it, Tonto.Jeremy: That's racist!
Friday the 13th Part 2
- This:Jeremy: Gotta hand it to Jason, even though he's a mass killer, he's so polite that he takes the tea off the stove when it's ready. What a nice guy.
- Jeremy at first laments Crazy Ralph showing up, then claims that he should have been the killer.
- "I really hate Ted."
- Later on, we get:Jeremy: Goddamn, I HATE this dude. End of sin!
- Finally:Jeremy: You mean f*cking Ted stays behind and gets to survive? F*ck the movie!
- Later on, we get:
- Commenting on Terry's lack of a bra.Jeremy: This nipples girl nipples doesn't nipples seem nipples too nipples worried nipples about nipples her nipples dog nipples being nipples gone nipples for nipple hours.
Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance
- "Idris Elba isn't in a better movie in this scene."
- One of the stingers:Johnny: You're safe here. We made it.
Graham Gouldman: Now that we've made it, we've made it to the top...
- Jeremy noting that the number of rich and powerful people "who would want to see the anointing of a new evil king" are basically the number of people that came to see Terminator Genisys on opening weekend".
- At the beginning of the film:Title Card: Halloween Night: 1963Jeremy: Only 22 days before Kennedy's assassination! Coincidence?!
- This:Jeremy: Man, it'd be weird if this one shot of a matchbook inspired a white-trash inspired reboot of this movie 29 years later. Thank God that movie doesn't exist.
Jeremy: Man, it'd be weird if Dr. Wynn returned in the sixth installment of this franchise and turned out to be the head of an evil cult that worships Michael Myers. Thank God that movie doesn't exist.
- Later on:
- Jeremy wonders how Michael Myers learned to drive if he spent his whole life in an insane asylum, then comes to the conclusion that he used secret Mario Kart paths.
- Jeremy sins payphones for no reason.
- Later, he sins rotary phones.
- When Laurie sees Michael in her backyard:
- This bit:Sheriff: All they took was some Halloween masks, a rope and a couple of knife.Jeremy: They stole a Halloween mask at the HARDWARE STORE!?
- When Laurie and Tommy watch The Thing From Another World on TV, Jeremy calls the movie out for showing the full 30 seconds of logos, referring to it as a sin within a sin.
- Jeremy wonders, since Michael teleports throughout the house, if he was given ninja training at the asylum.
- Jeremy repeatingly sinning Lindsey.
- This bit:Bob: First I rip your clothes off, then you rip my clothes off, then we rip Lindsey's clothes off.
- Jeremy cracks up at Michael dressing up as a bedsheet ghost disguised as Bob, admitting that Michael's got a good sense of humour.
- When Laurie stabs Michael with a knitting needle:Jeremy: Really feel like Laurie not saying "Sew this" as she stabs him was a missed opportunity.
- One of the outtakes:Dr. Loomis: I met this six year old, pale boy. He had these blank, emotionless eyes...Quint: [[Film/Jaws Lifeless eyes. Like a doll's eyes.]]
- The final outtake splices in Dr. Loomis's "I shot him 6 times!" rant over him shooting Michael Myers out the window.
- When Nurse Marion from the first film reappears, Jeremy is surprised she isn't dead from her chain smoking rather than being killed by Michael Myers.
- Jeremy questions what Michael Myers did for the past twenty years (noting that Halloween 4-6 was decreed non-canon) after he burnt to death at the end of Halloween 2:Jeremy: He stopped, dropped and rolled and...then what?
- "Introducing Josh Harnett." gets five sins.
- Jeremy is pleased to see that Janet Leigh and Jamie Lee Curtis share screen time...until he remembers that they were in John Carpenter's The Fog then dismisses it as "nobody saw The Fog anyway".
- This:Jeremy: This scene was LL Cool J's audition for Deep Blue Sea! Wait a minute...H20. Deep Blue Sea. There's a connection here...oh yeah! They both suck!
- This:Josh: It's been 20 years! Don't you think he would have shown up by now?!Jeremy: Yep.
- This bit:Ronnie: I want to tanalise myself with your sweet nectar.Jeremy: "Deepest. Bluest. My hat is like a shark's fin", she replied.
- Jeremy wonders if Michael should go into knife demonstration, with how he manages to lift people in the air with them.
- Jeremy refers to Ronnie as a reverse Deux Ex Machina: a Hominid Ut Defecta, which he translates as "a human f*cking sh*t up."
- At the ending of the film:Jeremy: Man, it'd be weird if Laurie wound up killing a paramedic instead of her brother and ended up in an insane asylum. Thank God that movie doesn't exist.
- One of the outtakes dubs in the "change" speech from Rocky IV over Michael reaching out to Laurie.
- The Jack-O-Lantern bonus round.
- "Dumbledore leaves Harry with his sh*t-headed relatives knowing full well they will abuse and mistreat him for years to come." *ding*
- "Hermione isn't old enough to be hot yet." *ding*
- As Harry sends off Hedwig..."Where am I supposed to go?!? You didn't give me a letter!!" *ding*
- In one post-review stinger...Voldermort: ...when you can join me, and live?
Jeremy: Voldermort offers an empire, but Harry strikes back. *ding*
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
- "I get the sense that Slytherin needs to re-brand itself. I mean, everything associated with Slytherin is evil. All the evil kids go here. If you're sent to Slytherin, the school is basically saying, 'You're a bad kid... Have fun being an asshole, s*ithead.'" *ding*
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
- "Black could be anywhere." "That's racist." *ding*
- The boggart scene:Jeremy: Holy sh*t, she just turned that cobra into something even scarier. Why is everyone laughing?! *ding*
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
- At the scene where Ireland's magic fireworks turn into a dancing leprechaun: "That's racist." *ding*
- This:Hermione: (to Ron) Would you care to join us?
Ron: No, I would not care to join you and Viktor.
Jeremy: Ron's character motivations are so base he might as well just be a penis. *ding*
- "The Yule Ball has been a tradition of the Triwizard Tournament since its inception." *BWOWM*
- "From now on, I'm calling my penis 'Secret Swan'". *ding*
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
- When Harry snaps at Ron:Harry: I said I'm fine, Ron!
Jeremy: Harry Potter is a dick to Rons. *ding*
- "Neville reaches deep down into his British roots and conquers India."
- For Harry and Cho's kiss: "Room of Requirement does not furnish condoms." *ding*
- This exchange.Ron: Well...how was it?
Jeremy: Well, this movie got a whole lot more interesting. *ding*
- These series of sins during the reveal of Grawp:Harry: And the more you care, the more you have to lose.
Jeremy: Well, then I must have nothing to lose right about now. *ding*
Harry: So maybe it's just better to...
Hermione: To what?
Jeremy: Well, sh*t, Hermione... if you don't interrupt, maybe he'll answer the question! *ding*
Ron: Any idea where he's taking us?
Harry: Hagrid, why can't you just tell us?
Jeremy: Because this is a Harry Potter movie, and he's Hagrid. I mean... those are the only two reasons I can see. *ding*
Hagrid: With Dumbledore gone... I'll likely be getting the sack any day now.
[Scene of Umbridge speaking to Hagrid is shown]
Jeremy: Didn't Umbridge visit you and already do that? *ding*
Hagrid: I couldn't just leave [Grawp], because... because he's my brother.
Jeremy: Dun dun DUUUUHN! *ding* Also, CGI brother is CGI. *ding*
[Ron tries to smack Grawp's leg with a stick when the latter grabs Hermione, but the stick breaks]
Jeremy: Is Ron serious? *ding*
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
- After layering all the relationship stuff, we get into Ron at the infirmary.Jeremy: Love how all the teachers are just silently absorbing the teen romance drama unfolding in front of them, as though there aren't more important topics to discuss or things to do. *ding*
- About Slughorn:Harry: You said Professor Slughorn would try to collect me.
Jeremy: Yeah, what the f*ck did you mean by that? *ding*
Harry: Do you want me to let him?
Jeremy: Wait...You KNOW what the f*ck he meant by that? *ding*
- About Butterbeer:Harry: Anyone fancy a butterbeer?
Jeremy: NO! I've been to your Wizarding World and I've had your "butterbeer" and it's disgusting. Cream soda, crossed with marshmallow, crossed with 15 pounds of sugar. You turned "sweet" into a swear word! *ding*
- Jeremy REALLY doesn't like the magical dancing cake topper. After the initial sin, he mentions it three more times
- First:Jeremy: Plenty of magic to go around during a time when everyone's scared of a massive threat. We can't protect the children, but we can make cake-toppers dance, so we got that going for us. *ding*
- Next, when the Weasleys' house catches on fire:Jeremy: Why is the family that uses magic to scrub pans and move cake-toppers worried about a simple fire? Can't they just magic up themselves a new shoe-house? *ding*
- Then, when Harry and Dumbledore call the boat to reach Voldemort's Horcrux:Jeremy: He's calling a boat out of the water, but... it's kind of hard to believe that in a world with a spell that makes cake-toppers dance there's not also a spell just to create a boat and plop it right where you're standing. *ding*
- Finally, in the scene where Harry overhears the conversation between Malfoy and Dumbledore:Jeremy: In a world full of magical bullsh*t that is completely unnecessary, there is apparently nothing called an "anti-eavesdropping" spell. They can create invisible train station entrances, fix eyeglasses, and other completely useless sh*t. Like dancing cake toppers. Have I mentioned this movie has magical dancing cake toppers? Because it does. *ding*
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1
- When Hermione reads the tale of the three brothers:Hermione: There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight.
Ron: Midnight. Mom always said midnight.
(Hermione glares at him)
Ron: ...But twilight's fine. Better, actually.
Jeremy: Ron betrays the Harry Potter series by saying "Twilight is better". I bet he's even on Team Jacob, the bastard. *ding*
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2
- When Harry is gathering Snape's tears into a vial, Jeremy Scott jokes about the movie's rapid shift in tone.Jeremy: Funny story. So, I went to go to the bathroom, and then I came back to a completely different auditorium showing a movie where some dude's tears were suddenly magical and being harvested by...Oh, wait, this is the RIGHT auditorium? *ding*
- When Voldemort announces "Harry Potter is dead!" and all of the other Death Eaters laugh, Jeremy responds by saying "Voldemort at the Improv!"
- When Harry and Voldemort lock wands during the final showdown.Jeremy: Harry and Voldemort set a bad example on how to celebrate Christmas. *ding*
- When Luna sits down next to Neville after the final fight between Harry and Voldemort:Jeremy: And the unlikely romantic pairings continue. *ding*
- At the opening shot of the house, all adorned with Christmas lights...Jeremy: Why, yes, the obviously well-off family with 1,600 kids has overdone it on the Christmas lights. Thanks for noticing!
- This:Buzz: Is it true that French babes don't shave their pits?Jeremy: C'est raciste.
- Peter tells Kevin to pick up the Micro Machines off the floor, which prompts this remark:Jeremy: Holy hell, a film shout-out to Micro Machines, whose commercials are on record as being 1/3 the inspiration of CinemaSins! Two sins off!! (-2 sins)
- Jeremy keeps commenting on the borderline sadistic nature of Kevin's traps, while taking occasional potshots at the implausibility of Kevin planning out and setting up all the traps in his house in little over one hour.Jeremy: (as Kevin is leaving the church) Kevin cuts this extremely close, waiting until 8:00 pm before even starting his plan to horribly mutilate Marv and Harry. *ding*
Kevin: This is my house! I have to defend it!
Jeremy: Sure, but you could also just call the goddamn cops as soon as the robbers show up, rather than design a Saw-like torture house. *ding*
Jeremy: (as Kevin unrolls the map of the traps) Not only did Kevin have time to develop this pain map in less than one hour, he found time to colorize it. *ding*
(after Kevin has shot Harry and Marv a few times —in the crotch and the face, respectively— with a BB-gun)
Jeremy: At this point, the burglars should call the cops on this psychotic little bastard that openly rejoices after shooting people in the face. *ding*
Jeremy: (when Harry activates the blowtorch trap) Not only does this not burn the house down, why the f*ck do the McCallisters have an antique blowtorch? And it works?!?! *ding*
Jeremy: (after Marv steps on the ornaments' shards) Kevin has a fascination with feet, but the angry kind. He's kind of like the Bizarro Quentin Tarantino. *ding*
Kevin: You guys had enough or are you thirsty for more?
Jeremy: Kevin could have called the cops several minutes ago, but would like to enact a few more acts of torment onto these wretched bastards. *ding*
(as Harry and Marv get caught by the tripwire after pushing their way through every other trap)
Jeremy: Kevin turns this impeccably-designed unholy house of pain into a damn footrace at the end. *ding*
Kevin: Hey, guys! (prepares to cut the zipline)
Jeremy: Had Kevin just run to the Murphys' house and left Marv and Harry up on the rope, he'd have avoided any dramatics when he got there, but no... this little asshole knows no mercy. *ding*
Home Alone 2: Lost In New York
- The reaction to the Donald Trump cameo:Kevin: Excuse me, where's the lobby?
Trump: Down the hall and to the left.
Sin counter: +1,000,000,000 sins
- When Kevin gets a hotel room by using a voice modifier to make his order:Kevin (slowed-down voice) This is Peter McCallister. The father.
Plaza Hotel woman: Yes, sir.
Kevin (slowed-down voice): I'd like a hotel room.
Plaza Hotel woman: Yes.
Jeremy: If you needed any more proof that Kevin grows up to be Saw and/or The Collector, here it is.
- A Brick Joke ensues in the stingers:
- Jeremy takes a sin off when Tim Curry shows up.Jeremy: I know I'm going hard on this movie, and it deserves it, but I'm taking off a sin for Tim Curry, who's a national f*cking treasure. And I don't care that he's English, we're claiming him! (-1 sin)
- Everything with Mr. Duncan:Mr. Duncan: Two turtle doves. You keep one, and you give the other one to a very special person.
Jeremy: "Or to a random homeless lady that you'll meet tonight and get to know for less than two hours. Up to you." *ding*
Mr. Duncan: You see, turtle doves are a symbol of friendship and love.
Jeremy: The 1990's was the last decade where this line being delivered by an old dude to a kid wouldn't be creepy. *ding*
- When Kevin slips on ice as he runs from Marv and Harry:"It took nearly two full movies for Kevin to finally be hoisted by his own petard." *ding*
- Dubbing one of Henry Jones Sr.'s lines into the moment where Harry and Marv are swarmed by pigeons. What's even funnier is that this was added after Marv's girly scream as he's being repeatedly pecked."I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne. Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky!"
- When the bank loan officer is seen, he is eating an apple, prompting Jeremy to do a variation on the "eating an apple makes you look like an asshole" Running Gag:Jeremy: The director said, "Let's have your bank loan officer character eat an apple in this scene. It'll make him look like an even bigger bank loan officer."
- Jeremy referring to the rambunctious kid at the beginning.Jeremy: Despite being ordered to stop by multiple authority figures, this asshole kid continues to asshole assholey.
- In one clip of the post-review stinger, Gru tells Agnes what happened to her stuffed unicorn:Gru: It has been disintegrated. (voice turns into that of Daffy Duck) And brother, when it disintegrates, it disintegrates!
Despicable Me 2
- Jeremy's rising annoyance at the Minions and their antics leads to him giving them nicknames such as "piss filled tater tots" and "jaundiced dildos".
- After one of the Arctic scientists clad in yellow coats shouts something in a foreign language:Jeremy: Jesus, can't ANY characters that are prominently yellow say anything comprehensible in these movies?!
- During Gru's date with Shannon, Lucy discreetly drugs her, prompting Jeremy to question why Gru did not "immediately call Bill Cosby's lawyer right now."
- One of the stingers shows the "most annoying sound in the world" scene from Dumb and Dumber, only with the noise dubbed over by the minion's "beedo, beedo".
Despicable Me 3
- "Boastsposition. Or is it Boatsposition? I mean, I guess it's Bothsposition."
- Jeremy singing his own lyrics to "O Christmas Tree".Oh, f*ck me hard, oh, f*ck me hard, how stupid is this movie?
- "Well, looks like someone's been reading the Kama Grutra, and finally got the section on Grustynining."
- Jeremy gets more and more annoyed at the Minions as the film goes on, culminating with him screaming in agony when they start singing 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall.
- When Jeremy hears that Bratt is the AVL's most wanted villain, we have this:Jeremy: But I thought you said—
[cut to the famous scene from The Professional]Jeremy: I mean...Silas: I want every agent in the area of the scene immediately!
- The opening:The Lorax: "I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees..."
- One of the stingers plays Fake Plastic Trees over a shot of Thneedville.
- This:The Onceler: Thneeds can do anything, they're super absorbant, can mop up the floor and they even make a nice hat!Jeremy: So... it's a towel.
- Even the YouTube description doesn't hide how much Jeremy hates this movie:YouTube description: F*cking Minions.
- Jeremy immediately calls out the movie for its opening logo, which has the Minions singing the Universal jingle.
- This:Narrator: This is Norbert. Norbert is an idiot.Jeremy: That's racist!
- One of the most scathing comments Jeremy's ever given out:Narrator: Minions are predisposed to find the most despicable masters they can find.Jeremy: So, the producers of this movie?
- Jeremy wonders if, since the Minions need to serve evil villains, if they ever worked for Hitler.
- When Kevin, Bob and Stewart arrive in Manhattan, Jeremy hopes that they'll run into Jason Voorhees.
- This bit:Scarlett Overkill: No! No! Don't say anything!Jeremy: You hit the nail of the head there, Sandy.
- This:Elderly Guard: So you think it's funny to mock the elderly, do you?!
- This scene:British Newscaster: Bob, who onlookers believed to be a bald and jaundiced child...Jeremy: Hahaha, fine, okay, that was actually funny. But if you think you're getting a sin removed for one good joke...you've got another sin coming.
- Jeremy reaching for the Brain Bleach when he learns the Minions have a sex drive.Jeremy: It was an itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow blob can't be unseeny. *Ding* Also, does this fire hydrant threesome mean that Minions have sex drives? Aaaaand I just realized Rule 34 applies to Minions and I would like to be done existing now, thanks.
The Secret Life of Pets
- This:Minion: ILLUMINATION! ILLUMINATION!Jeremy: IRRITATION! IRRITATION!
- "For a movie that likes animals so much, you think they'd stop beating a dead horse."
- "A daschund that slinks up a stairwell couldn't be more Toy if it Storyied."
- This exchange when Max runs away from the Flushed Pets:Max: We're sorry. Can this be over now?
- The Illuminations logo at the start features the Minions from Despicable Me singing the logo name, prompting Jeremy to do his usual studio-logo-is-too-long criticism thus:"Dammit Illumination, stop trying to distract me from the 48 seconds of logos by dressing them up with your tiny little cash cows!"
- At the end, the Illumination logo is seen again, and once again, the Minions sing the logo name. Again, it is sinned, but with no explanation at all this time.
- "Jeez, it's like some suit at Illumination saw Zootopia and said, 'Give me that, except more animal variety and less plot! Oh, and NO f*cking Shakira!'"
- Jeremy insults the way Meenah sings "Happy Birthday":"No one likes a person that over-sings the Happy Birthday song. You either shout it off key or you don't sing it at all, Tori Kelephant. Those are the rules."
- As the fan blows all of the flyers for the contest out the window, out of Buster's reach, Jeremy exclaims, "90% of this movie is fan-based!"
- As Buster mourns his theater's destruction while holding his father's bucket...Jeremy: Contrived koala carelessly cries, casually clutching cup. *ding*
- When the camera does a close-up of Ash's mouth when she's singing...Jeremy: Easy camera... it's only the porcupined version of Scarlett Johansson. *ding*
- The medium, Elise declares that the comatose boy, Dalton is lost in a place she calls "The Further".Jeremy: Aww...couldn't you have named it something a lot cooler?
- Elise declares that ghosts have gathered in the home because they can smell the boy's empty vessel.Jeremy: Yes these dead things can smell Dalton's empty, living vessel. That's why they waste their time turning on record players downstairs and appearing out of nowhere and generally making a nuisance of themselves.
- Elise is wearing a World War II gas mask to conduct a seance, for some reason.Jeremy: Oh come on.
- Elise: "LEAVE HIS BODY!"Jeremy: Why are demons so easily removed by yelling at them?
- Josh is overpowered by a being, and Elise gives him a motivational speech, assuring him that he is stronger due to having a living body. This allows him to shove the male with great force.Jeremy: Really? that's all it took to fend off the demon? A little pep talk and a Street Fighter move?
Insidious Chapter 2
- Sin 46: When the ghost of Parker Crane's mother appears before Renai, screams "Don't you dare!" and slaps her unconscious.Jeremy: Movie doesn't cater to my male-gazing hot-ghost-lesbian-on-hot-living-bi-curious-MILF wish-fulfillment.
- Sin 48: Carl the medium mentions how everyone has their own way of contacting the dead. Carl presents his alphabet dice.Jeremy: Mine just happens to be dumber than everyone else's.
- Sin 49: Carl tosses the dice onto the tableJeremy: Yahtzee!
Insidious Chapter 3
Insidious: The Last Key
- The warning during the title screen of "disturbing key-related scenes".
- When a little girl does a drawing of a strange figure:Jeremy: This girl is drawing Slenderman all wrong.
- At a Dull Surprise performance by one of the leads:
- This bit:Jeremy: She's fun.
- This:Elise: I'm not in the closet.Jeremy: Yeah, that's where the ghosts from The Conjuring series hang out.
- At one point, Jeremy gleefully points out that the demon looks more like "a rejected Ninja Turtle" than an actual demon.
- "In the last 13 minutes of this film, there's been more key action than in the previous record holder for key-related activities, Saw III. Sorry, Saw III. You had a good run."
- Jeremy laments that Tucker and Specs, the two inept ghost hunters from the last movie are main characters.
- During one of the many comedy relief scenes involving Tucker and Specs, Jeremy overdubs a wacky soundtrack over the scene.
- One of the most biting remarks from Jeremy yet:Jeremy: You mean the last film, where sh*t actually HAPPENED?!
- When the key finally enters the keyhole:Jeremy: Foreplay.
- Jeremy claims that the demon isn't actually evil and that it "just wants to be loved".
- "Yeah, I'm a demon. I slap people when I'm angry. You want a slap about it or what?!"
- When Goldfinger is revealed to be on the plane at the end of the movie:Jeremy: Oh come on. I could probably rattle off a hundred reasons why Goldfinger couldn't possibly have pulled this off, but I'm just gonna ding it. I mean, damn. *ding*
- In one of the stingers, they put the "Ricola" commercial sound over a shot of the Swiss mountains.
- During the scene where Bond sends away a female masseuse by slapping her butt, Jeremy muses "You take care, Continuity Girl!", lamenting the fact that there is a credited "continuity girl" in the film.
- Jeremy is less than awed by one of the most iconic scenes in action movie history:Bond: You expect me to talk?Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die!Jeremy: Something that a bullet could have done unconscious o'clock ago. *ding*
- Jeremy tries to hit the movie with a "Roll Credits" sin for the musical Title Drop, but is tripped up by the fact that credits are, in fact, rolling.
- "Oh no! Water! We can't possibly step to the side of it and shoot the tires out now! Oh the humanity!" *ding*
- Them giving the film a sin for every scene where Sean Bean doesn't die.
- At the end, when James and Natalya are making out in a field:Jack Wade: Maybe you two would like to finish debriefing each other at Guantanamo, hmm?Jeremy: You see kids, there was a time when having sex at Guantanamo didn't have bad connotations. *ding*
Casino Royale (2006)
- The "Do I look like I give a damn?" martini scene is funny enough that Jeremy deducts a sin for it!
- During the scene where Bond's car crashes and rolls, Jeremy waits until the car stops rolling to finally say "Bond survives this."
- The sentence? Bad Beat, which is accompanied by Teddy KGB's Villainous Breakdown from Rounders. And it continues to play over the "Subscribe" screen.
Quantum of Solace
- "Discount Older White Obama cameo - blink and you'll miss it!" *ding*
- Jeremy noting how the Big Bad looks more like Stevie from Eastbound & Down rather than a menacing villain.
- "Whoa, Bond is at the EXACT spot where Harry & Dumbledore found the Horcrux!!" *ding*
- Jeremy suddenly falls asleep mid-narration during the climactic fight in the burning hotel.
- When the words "Think on your sins" suddenly appears on M's hacked computer:Jeremy: Some people think we should do more of this. *ding*
Jeremy: It's almost like this movie is daring us to make this video. *ding*
- It comes back as a Brick Joke again, when the exact same message appears for the second time.
- When Bond is examining the files that were recovered from Skyfall:Jeremy: When the fire started burning this photograph, it knew exactly which person to delete from the picture because fire loves mysteries. *ding*
- This exchange regarding a slight Out-of-Character Moment for Bond:Q: I also have a mortgage. And two cats to feed.Bond: Well, then I suggest you trust me... for the sake of your cats.Jeremy: Did... Bond just threaten Q's cats? And maybe Q's life in the process? That's the reason Q's going along with this? My hero? *ding*
- During the snow plane scene, these sins ensue:Jeremy: As Bond's incredibly stupid stunt is about to prove, this easily could have killed Madeleine, but f*ck it. *ding*(When Bond is using the snow plane as a toboggan to turn at a dangerous curve...)
Jeremy: This bulls*it is the most Pierce Brosnan-esque the Daniel Craig Bond movies have ever gotten]]!! *ding*
(And after he uses the snow plane to crash through a building and ram it into the enemy's vehicles...)
Jeremy: This is the kind of lucky bulls*it that I can't f*cking stand in these movies anymore. *ding*
Madeleine: Did it cross your mind that you led them to me?!
Jeremy: Madeleine is 100% f*cking correct. *ding*
(And during the moment where the supposedly dead Mr Hinx has a Finger-Twitching Revival...)
Jeremy: Batista is a horror movie villain. *ding*
- When the third act of the movie begins in London:Jeremy: Don't tell me it's London... don't tell me it's... (The caption "London" appears on the screen) goddammit. *ding*
John Wick 2
- After Giana slits her wrists:Giana: I did it...my way.Jeremy: Well, that's an odd thing to say. And Sinatra beat you to it.
- This:Bully: Prepare to die, Parrish!Jeremy: Come on, kid, his actual name is Parrish! "Prepare to perish, Parrish" was just sitting there for you and you completely missed it! *ding*
- "Yeah, they're terrifying and definitely a nuisance, but these bats aren't doing jack s*it to Sarah except flying around. Maybe they're trying to teach her about becoming a symbol of hope to a crime-riddled city or something like that".
- "Notice how Monopoly is at the bottom of the other stack. That's because Monopoly, much like Jumanji, tears peoples' lives apart".
- Another gem:Alan: I've seen things you've only seen in your nightmares...
- Near the end, Jeremy goes on a rant due to the inconsistencies of the pieces on the board and adds a total 63 sins: 23 for the number of inconsistencies, 15 for each minute he spent writing up said inconsistencies, and 25 more for the studio screwing it up so often.
- After hearing the girls speaking French at the end, he swears to god that if Dwayne Johnson isnt wearing a beret and eating croissants in the sequel.
Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle
- When the board game transforms into a video game offscreen with a sickly green glow:Jeremy: Is there a Gremlin masturbating to a sleeping Alex?
- Jeremy instantly notes the movie's Sony product placement:Jeremy: It's 2017 and these kids all have Sony phones. Nothing weird about that at all.
- When the movie first enters Jumanji:
- At one point, Jeremy considers Jumanji to be a bigger dick than Myst because "at least you could exit Myst."
- Jeremy takes glee in pointing out every single instance the game doesn't act like a real video game.
- The character Alex is referred to as Camp Rock's Nick Jonas throughout the entire video.
- "This jumping is so fake, they should just play Mario noises over it. In fact, let's do that right now!" The video then rewinds and plays Mario sound effects over the scene in question.
- After the game is destroyed:Jeremy: Yeah, like that'll stop a sequel.
- The last sin:Guns n' Roses: (during credits) Welcome to the jungle!
The Lost World: Jurassic Park
- The SEGA line:Jeremy: SEGA wishes that line wasn't dated as hell!
- The film's All-Star Cast.Jeremy: Movie keeps putting in all these actors who were red hot in the mid-90s like that's not distracting as sh*t. I mean, I love this guy and his character, but damn it's like the casting director looked at the list of actors for this movie, tried to narrow it down, and finally said, "I will choose...
- When Sarah snarks that the T-Rex is "just happy to see them":Jeremy: <sigh> Sarah's still anthropom—, anthrop—, anthropomor— ...giving human characteristics to the T-Rex.
Jurassic Park III
- The Talking Raptor dream:Jeremy: Jurassic Park III can't tell you enough how much it hates you.
- Made even funnier when he actually uses the audio of the scene as the sentence of the film.
- The Reveal that Billy stole some Raptor eggs in the hopes he can sell them and help fund Grant's failing dig is Hilarious in Hindsight (in either a really funny or darkly funny) way with all of the twists in Jurassic World and Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom:Jeremy: It's not a Jurassic Park movie if someone isn't trying to smuggle something dino-related off the island. No, seriously. Every movie. I bet Jurassic World has some theme park investor trying to smuggle a baby dino inside his suitcase or some sh*t. You watch.
- What is probably some of the most biting sarcasm ever put in a video:Owen: (after the I. rex just wiped out a capture team) Get everyone off the island.
Claire: We'd never reopen.
Jeremy: Ooooooh, okay then. Keep it open. *ding*
- Jeremy references a different film that one of the boys was in:Gray: I Googled. They're divorce lawyers.
Jeremy: Which happens, dads leave, no need to be a pussy about it. *ding*
- The shot of Owen and the raptor pack charging through the jungle, set to the tune of "The Quintet" from West Side Story.
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
- At a shot of a bathyosphere:Jeremy: James Cameron immediately had to change out of his pre-ejaculation jeans after watching the first 3 minutes of this film.
- This bit:Mercenary: What the hell is that?Jeremy: Well, considering you're at a park that last contained a T-Rex, I'm going to guess...the smoke monster from LOST!
- At the opening title effects:Jeremy: Wow, I haven't seen CGI fire this impressive since Spawn.
- Jeremy's brutal honesty:Newscaster: Should these dinosaurs be given the protection that other endangered species enjoy?Jeremy: No.Newscaster: Or should they just die out?Jeremy: Yes.
- This bit:Congressman: We will not condone any government involvement over what amounts to private land.
- Followed with:Claire: They're all going to die. And no one cares.Jeremy: Roll credits! ...Please?!
- This:Claire: You're more likely to die on a horse than on a plane.Jeremy: Oh yeah? Why don't you tell that to...Text to Speech Voice: LANGUAGE NOT APPROVED LANGUAGE NOT APPROVED
- When Owen reunites with Blue, Jeremy remarks that he'd remove 500 sins if Blue just ate him.
- Jeremy gives the voice of Mr. Bill to two dinosaurs in the background:Jeremy (as Mr. Bill): Oh no! The volcano is erupting!
- Jeremy is dumbfounded at the dinosaurs selling for only 10 million dollars, noting that there's condos in New York that cost more.
- Jeremy declares the movie is "Dumber than Rampage Dumb. Dumber than Emoji Movie Dumb. Dumber than Dumber and Dumber Too Dumb!"
- When Blue escapes an explosion, Jeremy questions if they put any DNA from John Mc Clane in her.
- Near the end of the movie:Claire: But they'll all die!Jeremy: Good! Let them die and decrease the surplus population!
- This bit:Maisie: They're alive. Like me.Jeremy: Kid. Silverfish are alive. Killer wasps are alive. John Tesh is alive. But none of them contribute to society and are invasive species.
- The last sin of the video:Ian Malcolm: Welcome to...Jurassic World.Jeremy: PLEASE ROLL THE MOTHERF*CKING CREDITS!
- One of the outtakes:Lockwood: Go to bed!Samuel L. Jackson: Go the f*ck to sleep!
- When Valentine has a rant about politicians:Jeremy: Is this guy a bad guy... or simply... right? *ding*
- During the church meeting sequence that happened before the infamous church fight:
- One character sprints through a cramped area being shot at by about a dozen guards without getting tagged (technically his suit is bulletproof, but his face and limbs aren't). CinemaSins responds to this by playing the invincibility music from Super Mario Bros. over the scene.
- "Man...anal sex...it could be said that the end of this movie got downright cheeky, amiright?" *ding*
- One of the stingers involves a scene of dogs in cages overdubbed with audio from The Muppets Take Manhattan.
Kingsman: The Golden Circle
- When the inevitable Title Drop happens:"Roll joints." *ding*
- Jeremy calling himself out for being a bit mean-spirited during Emmet's morning routine.Jeremy: Hi, I'm Cinema Sins, and I take joyful moments and try and f*ck them up. Jeez, what an asshole I am.
- Jeremy gives Superman Take Thats throughout the video.
- Jeremy asks if LEGO sex is "the most basic thing ever".
- This quote:
- When Vitruvius dies of decapitation, Jeremy laughs, removing a sin.
- When Jeremy sees Emmet watching Where Are My Pants?, we get this:
- The last sin:President Business: Whoops, I have the antidote for the Kragle.
Jeremy: Yeah, but even when they douse this universe in mineral spirits, there's no fucking way you can get dude's pants off now.
- Sentence: LEGO Jail
The LEGO Batman Movie
- The movie starts off with lampshades as to how movies begin. Jeremy makes quick note of each lampshade, and gets to a point where he wonders if the movie is a fan of Cinema Sins.Jeremy: If the movie had just said, "Narreading," I would have stopped the movie and the sins video right here. Shortest sins video ever. Job would be done. We'd have an internal discussion about even releasing it.
- The movie did a great job of actually making Jeremy laugh, prompting quite a few sin removals.
- Jeremy points out that the elevator is way slow, microwaving lobsters are for suckers, and Batman is watching Jerry Maguire.
- This scene.Dick Grayson: But all the kids in the orphanage called me "Dick".Bruce Wayne: Well, children can br cruel.Jeremy: [laughs, then removes a sin]
- "Batman's exhaust fire kills hundreds, film at 11".
- Jeremy lampshades the fact that Batman is playing a guitar in the middle of fighting crime.
- The last sin.Batman: All important movies end with a white screen.Jeremy: That's racist.
The LEGO Ninjago Movie
- "Old-timey ninja-movie-style logos are...hopefully not racist."
- "LEGO shark projectiles rip off the seagulls from Finding Nemo."
- "Gee, thanks Oracle, Yoda, sensei, Dustin Hoffman-rat, Morpheus, Obi-Wan, and Gandalf!"
- When the Wilhelm scream is heard four times:Jeremy: Repetition Equals Laughs Ex Wilhelm.
- Followed by this:One of Garmadon's minions: Phew. Just one day till retirement. (blows up)Jeremy: "Guy has one day 'till retirement, mentions it, and dies" cliche.
- "Garmadon would be excellent at CinemaSins."
- "Not sure what I just saw, but I'm ready to kill the Malaysian prime minister at my next fashion show."
- "Lloyd's friends are a dick to Lloyd. And they're also really stupid."
The Incredible Hulk
- Jeremy's comments about the "Green Sasquatch" newspaper article.
- The response to the military continuing to shoot the hulk when it's obvious bullets don't work.
- "How are we gonna get where we need to go on $40 and no credit cards?"Jeremy: That's the exact same question that launched CinemaSins, actually. *ding*
Iron Man 2
- When Tony's eating doughnuts in the Randy's Donuts structure, they have Homer Simpson saying, "I paid for a colossal doughnut, and I'm going to get a colossal doughnut."
- Jeremy going over Loki's complex, yet dumb plan to become the heir to the throne of Asgard.
- "Movie introduces Hawkeye and he does jack s*it."
- This gem:Thor: Can you see her?Heimdall: (chuckles) Yes.Jeremy: Hey, can you tell me what she's wearing?
- One of the stingers: Playing the "We Do" song from The Simpsons over the scene when Thor talks with Hogan and Volstag before they go to Johtunheim.
- "This is a Tesseract, and that's pretty much all we'll ever know for sure about it." *ding*
- The numerous hints of love among the superheroes, whether it's Captain America and Iron Man almost kissing or Tony Stark and Bruce Banner driving off together while the Cinema Sins Narrator wonders if they are dating.
- "Cap gets AIDS from handling bloody baseball cards."
- A pair of "superhero pissing contests."
Iron Man 3
- Putting audio from The Incredibles of Syndrome taunting Mr. Incredible over a clip with Aldrich Killian after Tony Stark is captured.
- After Killian murders Maya Hansen.Killian: ...a high-level position has just been vacated.
The Joker: So which of you fine gentlemen would like to join our team?
- The Bonus Round consisting of every submission of "Scene does not contain a lap dance".
- When we find out that The Mandarin is actually a washed up British actor named Trevor Slattery.Trevor: My name's Trevor...
Jeremy: Surprise! Except it's stupid. *ding*
- And before the above moment:
- The entries submitted by the Screen Junkies crew is voiced by Jon Bailey, the Honest Trailers narrator.Jon Bailey (on the one the paparazzi people recording video with the phone vertically): Vertical video. *ding*Interviewer that Jon Bailey called the worst extra ever: Just sayin'.Jon Bailey: And I'm just sayin' you're a terrible extra. *ding*Jon Bailey (on the bad positioning of one of the microphones): Good mic placement, dude. *ding*Jon Bailey (on the one of the interviewers bringing a notepad and a pen): Ha ha. This guy only brought a pen and a pad. *ding*(Tony Stark throws a phone away...)Jon Bailey : Tony Stark is a dick to phones. *ding*(As Tony Stark heads home...)Jon Bailey: Car is pointed one way when he gets in, then leaves in the other direction. *ding*
Jeremy: *Ahem* What are you doing?Jon Bailey: (nervous chuckle) Uh, what's that over there? Boobs.
- And the sin-counting paused for this exchange:
- The bonus round for "Scene does not contain a lap dance" submissions.
- And the misfit sins as well, such as "Why. Is there a bunny?" (in response to Pepper's white outfit), "You're lazy. Sins are your job.", "The black guy doesn't die? (sorry for racism)" and "What if a shark eats it?" Presumably referring to Tony Stark throwing his deactivated chestpiece into the Pacific Ocean.
Thor: The Dark World
- When Malekith confronts Frigga:Frigga: Who are you?
Captain America: The Winter Soldier
- One of the stingers shows a clip of Cap visiting his wing in the museum. In place of the regular video is Everything Wrong With Captain America: The First Avenger.
- One of the stingers is combining Steve Rogers' speech via speakers in the S.H.I.E.L.D. HQ with Emmet Brickowski's "I may not be a Master Builder" speech from The LEGO Movie.Captain America: Attention, all SHIELD agents, this is Steve Rogers. (in Emmet's voice) I may not be a Master Builder. I may not have a lot of experience fighting or leading or coming up with plans, or having ideas in general.
- Another stinger is Sam Wilson (aka The Falcon) punching Brock Rumlow with audio of the Japanese "Falcon Punch!" sound from the Japanese F-Zero: Falcon Densetsu anime.
- Jeremy criticizing Cap's tendency to be invincible in the movie by asking why the good guys come up with a plan to use chips to subvert Project Insight, instead of just having Cap knock all the heli-carriers out of the sky by punching their engines out.
Guardians of the Galaxy
- Saying Gamora looks like the child of Uhura and the "green chick" from Star Trek (2009) along with the "blue chick" from Avatar. Then giving it a sin for not featuring a "sex tape" of said conception.
- A touch of Self-Deprecation, comparing the assumed ease of Vin Diesel's voiceover job playing Groot to his own doing Cinema Sins.
Jeremy: This guy has never seen CinemaSins.
- An additional bit of Self-Deprecation comes when Rhomann Dey says that he doesn't believe anyone is one-hundred percent a dick:
- Saying Stormtroopers have better aim than the guards at the Kyln.
- Adding Michigan J. Frog singing "Hello, My Baby" (and then croaking) to the scene where the Groot sapling is dancing while Drax is cleaning his knives.
- Dubbing over the Guardians' police lineup with the audio from the police lineup scene in The Usual Suspects.
- After using the "I may not be a Master Builder" speech in one of the stingers of EWW Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Jeremy uses it again, this time applying it to Peter Quill, who is played by Chris Pratt, who also voiced Emmet in The LEGO Movie.
Avengers: Age of Ultron
- "This isn't some cute piece of technology like the Iron Man armor!"Jeremy: Whoa whoa WHOA!
- "The Italian Impossible Eleven!" *ding*
- When Ant-Man realises that in order to sabotage the Yellowjacket's titanium suit from the inside, which he cannot do while shrunk, he has to go subatomic, Jeremy comments that since the Yellowjacket's suit also consists of yellow stretchy material, Ant-Man can just tear through it and punch the Yellowjacket in the dick several times.
Captain America: Civil War
- "So Zemo's plan is to...wash that evil right out of his hair?"
- In the scene where Cap prevents the helicopter from taking off:Jeremy: OK, if we have to remove 3 sins for this, I guess we will. Sin Counter will NOT be happy!
- And it wasn't. After the sin removal, the sin counter reads "73 :(" until the next sin is added.
- "Cap and Tony take an hour and a half to start Civil Warring."
- "Get this to Ross." "Which one?"
- "In 2016, audiences were delighted to see Inception 2 in theaters, which they weirdly called Doctor Strange. I mean, strangely called Doctor Strange."
- Jeremy takes a minute to draw some parallels between Stephen Strange and another, surprisingly similar superhero.
- This moment:Kaecilius: (to Wong) You're on the wrong side of history, my friend.
Jeremy: Or maybe, dare I say it... the WONG side of history! Ha ha ha... I'll give myself five sins for that.
(screen shows an extra counter that says Cinema Sins Sin Counter: ∞ + 5)
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2
- This:Zylax: Fire with the intent to kill.
- Drax comically crashes into trees and doesn't comically die.
- "Guardians of the Galaxy continues to try and shove Howard the Duck in our faces."
- This callback to a Running Gag from the original GOTG sins video:Yondu: You a professional asshole or what?
- Despite liking the movie, Jeremy drags it several times for its poor pacing.
- Jeremy sins the scene where Quill transforms into a giant rock monster version of Pac-Man for reminding him of Pixels.
- At the beginning of the film, we get this:Jeremy: This is as good of a time as any to say that the collective timeline of all the films in the MCU is basically f*cked.
- This:Aunt May: My turkey meatloaf was a disaster!Jeremy: I could have told you that before you started cooking, but whatever.
- This bit:Spidey: Great movie!Jeremy: Movie steals an outtake from us.
- Eventully, Jeremy gets fed up with all of the things the Spidey suit can do and comes up with a new version of the 1967 theme song:Jeremy Spider-God! Spider-God! There's literally nothing this suit can't do for him!
- Jeremy scoffing at Liz not having a date to homecoming, even if the in-universe excuse is she was too busy planning the dance.Jeremy: Yea no, a girl that hot has a date, a back-up date, and three friend-zoned guys waiting on standby.
- This moment:Surtur: I must fufill my destiny and lay waste to your home.Jeremy What a sh*tty destiny. For him and everyone else. He's like an intergalactic Airbnb nightmare.
- Followed up by:Surtur: I must bring about Ragnarok.Jeremy Ragna-roll credits.
- At one point, Jeremy notes the background extras are so bad, he questions if they're winners of a contest that got to be in the scene.
- This:Odin: Isn't this beautiful?Jeremy Wow, Norway looks fake as sh*t.
- Jeremy refers to Hela as "Space-Catwoman" throughout the video.
- He laters notes that she looks like "a rejected concept for Maleficent 2".
- When Thor lands on Sakaar, Jeremy immediately ponders if it's the trash planet from The Transformers: The Movie and if the Junkions are nearby.
- When Thor's electric powers come out of his eyes:Jeremy Well, they finally did it. They turned Thor into Raiden.
- When Loki looks into the mind of Valkyrie, Jeremy is quick to note that it's not the "Tom Cruise trying to kill Hitler movie".
- On the subject of Skurge's HeelFace Turn:Jeremy Because he did one good thing, it immediately negates all the bad things he did. All is forgiven!
- The Running Gag about the movie theater ushers hating the end credit scenes continue from the Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 video.
- One of the outtakes plays "It's a Small World" over the tour of Sakaar.
- During the opening narration:N'jobu: To become the first Black Panther.Jeremy Roll kittens!
- Jeremy is in disbelief that T'Challa, the future king of Wakanda, allowed his sister to flip him off.
- The Running Gag about the bad special effects culminates in Jeremy wondering if they used Weebles to simulate the crowds.
- This:T'Challa: WAKANDA FOREVER!Jeremy And so, millions of people are going to ask Chadwick Boseman to do this for the rest of his life.
- When a civilan's car is reduced to a seat and a steering wheel:Jeremy: I guess I must have missed the part where this Marvel movie became a Bugs Bunny cartoon.
- Jeremy on the climatic fight: "Man, and I thought my family's get togethers were awkward. Last year's Thanksgiving's got NOTHING on this!"
- Jeremy gets increasingly irritated over how Vibrantium can seemingly do everything.
- Jeremy groans in dismay at the appearance of the CGI rhinos in the climatic battle.
- The sentence? Dusted.
- One of the outtakes dubs in Miracle Max over T'Challa's death scene.
Avengers: Infinity War
- The YouTube description lampshades all of the requests the channel has recieved for the movie and says that "Now you can pick a new movie to yell at us about not having sinned yet. :)"
- This, if only for the mental image if provides:Jeremy: 18% of the MCU has just been Thanos bitching on the freeway.
- The Running Gag about Jeremy forgetting the number of movies in the MCU.
- This bit:Wong: Six stones, spread across the universe!Jeremy: Why only six?
- This bit:Jeremy: Oh, Ned, you are such a treasure. removes a sin
- Jeremy claims that Mark Ruffalo's performance as Bruce Banner is "the most embarrasing thing he's done since In The Cut."
- This:Subtitle: SPACEJeremy: While this is 100% not a reaction to Cinema Sins complaining about placenames being used when they're unecessary, this is 100% a reaction to CinemaSins complaining about placenames being used when they're unecessary!
- Jeremy sins Groot playing Defender, partially because he's shocked there isn't any future-space video games and partially because "Defender is a f*cking awful arcade game."
- When Thor lands on the Guardians ship windshield:
- This:Thor: Who the hell are you people?!Jeremy: That's a rude way to greet people you don't know. Why, I woke up one time in this room and this dude tried to do all this gnarly sh*t with these strange tools and I was all like "Who the hell are you" and he said "I'm your f*cking dentist!". Dr. James Packer D.D.S was tough but fair.
- Jeremy is distracted by a sign saying that "We will deep fry your kebab" and spends some time trying to piece together what it might mean.
- When Wanda fights a henchman:Jeremy: Why does she have to THROW her MIND powers at people?!
- When Falcon shows up:Jeremy: Hahahahaha. Guns. Hahahahahaha.
- When Gamora seeks shelter from Thanos:Jeremy: Why don't you just go and hide in a cave with Spock?
- "NO ONE in this movie should have a Rickenbacker bass and have it displayed on the floor stand in a library. This guitar is the biggest lie the MCU has ever told."
- Jeremy refers to Thor Ragnarok as Thor 33 1/3.
- "F*cking Bucky." Made all the more funnier with Jeremy's legit rage at him showing up.
- "This is the second Marvel movie to completely waste Peter Dinklage."
- This:Red Skull: The Soul Stone is a very special stone...Jeremy: Why?Red Skull: It requires a certain type of wisdom...Jeremy: But why?!
- "Oh, goody! Just what I wanted to see in my Marvel movies, swarms of easily killable CGI monster clones! Thanos can easily do the job right now, but why do that when you can reenact Braveheart instead?!"
- During a particularly incomprehensible fight scene:Jeremy: A bunch of whatever!
- This:Rocket: I think he's dying!Dwarf: HE NEEDS THE AXE!Jeremy: Why?! He's not the god of axes, is he?!
- When Bruce Banner enters a mech:Jeremy: Bad CGI floating Bruce Banner head gives me nightmares.
- This:Thanos: With a snap of my fingers...they would all cease to exist.Jeremy: Why a snap? Why not an OK sign or a salute? Or a middle finger? Or The Shocker?
- During the fight on Titan, Jeremy removes a sin for Thanos utilizing the moon in the fight, stating that they'd answered a question he'd never thought to ask - but then sins it because everyone survives it.
- When Star-Lord attacks Thanos:Jeremy: This f*cking guy.
- When Vision returns in the final fight:Jeremy: Vision-Ex Machina! Seriously, this guy should be vomiting magenta computer code right now but instead, he's well enough to fight?! Just have 25% more consistancy, Marvel! That's all I ask!
- Jeremy refuses to remove sins for the iconic snap and instead chooses to point out every reason why it doesn't work from a storytelling standpoint instead.
- The sentence for the movie? Dissolved. On its own, its not that funny but with the audio track playing underneath it...
Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials
- Using the Robot Roll Call from Mystery Science Theater 3000 in one of the outtakes.
Maze Runner: Death Cure
- This bit:Jenkins: You're late.Jeremy: Because, clearly, punctuality is still important in this post apocalyptic wasteland.
- Jeremy gives some extra backstory to two pilots:Pilot: We're on our way, sir.Jeremy: "Hey Fred, why didn't they just use our plane to transfer the kids?"Jeremy: "I dunno, Bob. WICKED just pays me in tequila shots."Jeremy: "Holy sh*t. How'd you get promoted to tequila shots?"Jeremy: "Networking, Bob, networking."
- "Remember when these Maze Runner movies actually had mazes? Good times, good times... "
- This:Thomas: Minho, can you hear me?Jeremy: Yeah, f*ck all these other enslaved kids! I only care about Minho!
- The Running Gag about Jeremy getting upset over WICKED not using their airships throughout the movie.
- "They better get off that roof before they're CGI-ed to death!"
- "Oh hey, Frodo. What are you doing in this film? Not a damn thing." *ding*
- "This kill is lucky, but this kill is downright inexcusable." *ding*
The Hobbit - The Desolation of Smaug
- The sentence uses Thorin's dwarvish insult, then dubs over Kyle for a translation."Dude, I think he told us to go f*ck ourselves!"
- Jeremy's complaints about the film's long runtime, which culminates in this after a Title Drop:Jeremy: Roll credits... please! *ding*
- When the dwarves reach the mountain entrance and are about to give up because the keyhole isn't visible:Jeremy: Bull-SH*T. We walked all this f*cking way and nearly died a million times. Give me the f*cking key and I'll drag it along the rock until it hits a keyhole. *ding*
The Hobbit - The Battle of the Five Armies
- Jeremy's explanation of Gandalf's plan, pointing out a major flaw."Also, let's not forget the very reason why this whole thing happened. Gandalf met with Thorin and told him to retake the Mountain. And his vague reasoning was that "darker minds would turn their heads toward it", forgetting the fact that everyone so scared of this damn dragon that no one DARED go near it, and the idea of Sauron's return was not even considered possible at the time. I don't know what "darker minds" Gandalf was thinking about... but none of those assholes could have killed the dragon. It took a well-placed arrow in a rumored weak spot to take that f*cker down, but Gandalf was worried enough that he started all this sh*t. Never once did he seem concerned about Thorin getting "dragon-sickness", but oh well. Gold is evil. I think we all learned something here today." *ding*
- Jeremy commenting on the reduced screentime for Bilbo, who is supposed to be the main character of this series:Jeremy: This movie about elves and dwarves is strangely titled The Hobbit. *ding*
- Shortly after, as Legolas is using the Stepping Stones in the Sky, they dub in the Mario jumping sound effect.
The Lord of the Rings - The Fellowship of the Ring
- "What the f*ck is Sauron reaching for?! Just kill the guy! You have this huge mace... FOR KILLING."
- *shot of Frodo reading* "Reading."
- "After Bilbo's unnerving proclamation, Gandalf apparently said, 'Dude you need to smoke some weed.' "
- The question about what Frodo was doing for that long time after Bilbo disappeared. "What the f*ck was Frodo doing for the last 20 minutes after Bilbo disappeared? Looking for Bilbo in places other than Bilbo's house?"
- "Convenient hiding tree is convenient."
- The Nazgûl feel the presence of the ring at all times and are drawn to it... until it's convenient for them not to be drawn to it.
- The proper identification of a blade.Aragorn: He's been stabbed by a Morgul blade. (blade turns to dust)Jeremy: You know, the kind that dissolve dramatically after you identify it.
- "Terrible as the dawn?! The f*ck is that supposed to mean?"
The Lord of the Rings - The Two Towers
- This moment.Legolas: This forest is old.Jeremy: How old is it?!(brief pause)Legolas: Very old.
- Aragorn stating that 2,000 good men are riding north, followed by the scene in which the group of men (a rather small group) is sent.(an arrow points at the men) "Does this look like 2,000 men? Where did Aragorn learn to count?"
- Legolas doing an almost-acrobatic move to climb above a horse."You know,I believe a lot of things in these movies: magic, talking trees, immortality, evil spirits... but in no way do I believe Legolas got on this horse in the manner depicted."
"Who... the f*ck is that? That is not Gimli!"
- Followed by a quick examination of the dwarf who is behind him on the horse.
- "To enter the Forbidden Pool bears the penalty of death."Jeremy: The Forbidden Pool? Are you making this sh*t up as you go along?
- On the sin videos of both this and the former movie, the Nazgûl have failed to detected the ring they are meant to detect even when feet away from it. This subject is not mentioned again until near the end of the video, when Nazgûl is seen.(arrow points at the Nazgûl) "This asshole probably still can't detect the ring."
- The sentence - Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew.
- The last stinger: An Uruk-Hai runs to set the bombs while holding a torch to the Olympic Games theme.
The Lord of the Rings - The Return of the King
- As the Rohirrim Army takes down one of the Oliphants: "No CGI elephants were injured in the making of this scene."
- "Sauron fails at Blue's Clues. HE'S RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!"
Newscaster: Update, we still have no f**king clue where this guy is.
- It carries into one of the stingers, where they use a clip from the movie, BASEketball.
- "OH MY GOD YOU WHORES!"
- One of the stingers: The reinforcements for the Orcs at Pelenor Fields are a group of Imperial AT-ATs.
- During the scene where Jack shows Claire the glasses gadget:Jack: There is a camera built right into the bridge.Jeremy: Movie unintentionally inspires Google Glass. *ding*
- When Ethan uses the explosive gum in the restaurant to create a diversion for him to escape, which causes a man to get blasted into a pane of glass:Jeremy: Ethan probably killed that guy... but hey, when you're innocent of a crime, all of the crimes you commit afterwards are legal. *ding* Also... was that window already pre-broken? *ding*
Jeremy: So, someone sold his own team out and they're all dead, his boss thinks he's a mole, and he just learned that there was a 2nd IMF team shadowing them the entire mission... yet Ethan still thinks that it's a smart idea to return to the safe house? Jason Bourne is laughing at your carelessness, Ethan Hunt. *ding*
- As well as the sin after those two, where Ethan hides in the IMF safehouse:
- Jeremy's reaction to how small the money that Ethan hands to Claire.Jeremy: That's some tiny money! It's so tiny, it's cute! Who's a cute little dollar bill guy, huh, is it you little fella? *ding*
- The sentence, for those who know what the next Mission Impossible film is like. Overdose of John Woo. Cue sounds of Disturbed Doves playing over the "Subscribe" screen.
Ethan: WAKE UP, CLAIRE! JIM'S DEAD! THEY'RE DEAD! THEY'RE ALL DEAD! (Voice changes to Al Capone's) I want him dead! I want his family dead! I want his house burned to the ground! I wanna go there in the middle of the night and I wanna piss on his ashes!
- When Ethan is yelling at Claire that their team are gone:
Zed: Bring out the Gimp.
- When Ethan is wearing a black bag mask to see Max, the audio of Pulp Fiction plays over the scene.
Maynard: Gimp's sleeping.
Zed: Well, I guess you're gonna have to go wake him up now, won't you?"Come out to the coast! We'll get together, have a few laughs!"
- During the moment where Ethan is watching the television news showing that his mother and uncle were arrested, the news report about "a strange man dressed as an elf wandering through Central Park" is edited onto the television screen instead.
Mission: Impossible II
- When Ethan is monitoring Nyah via a transmitter:Jeremy: So, while [Nyah and Ambrose] had sex, did Ethan watch the tiny yellow dot move three inches, then back three inches, and so on and so forth... during the whole thing? *ding*
[Ethan contemplates over a sunset]
Jeremy: "My thief girlfriend is banging her criminal ex-boyfriend" sunset. *ding*
- When Luther is almost shot:Luther: That punk put a hole in my Versace!
Jeremy: Okay... you wearing Versace on a mission, him hitting the jacket and not you, and you not taking the opportunity to use the Showgirls pronounciation of Versayce. Three sins in one. (+3 sins)
Mission: Impossible III
- Two sins occur when Brassel is giving a What the Hell, Hero? speech towards Ethan and Musgrave.Brassel: I've been trying to bring Davian down since the day I got here.
Jeremy: Does that mean you too are a failure at CIA-ing? *ding*
Brassel: Your operation has achieved one thing. You have reminded Davian that he is winning.
Jeremy: And that's what we hate the worst at the CIA, is bad-guy self-affirmations. *ding*
- When Ethan is escaping from the IMF because he was framed of being a rogue agent, knocking over a box filled with Virginia Department of Transportation (VGOT) brochures...Jeremy: Irony. note *ding*
- During the entire Shanghai car chase scene:Jeremy: This car chase scene is filled with so much shaky camera movement, and so many edits, and confusion... why even bother keeping up? *ding*
- The exchange when Musgrave gives his Motive Rant towards Ethan:Musgrave: I've had enough of Brassel and his sanctimony. IMF director, he's an affirmative action poster boy.Jeremy: That's racist. *ding*
- The sentence of this film, "Hung Outside An Airplane", is a deliberate Call-Forward, as it not only refers to Ethan's High-Altitude Interrogation on Davian, but also on his eventual plane stunt two films later.
Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol
- "Paula Patton is... damn... simply not my girlfriend. I am a failure."
- This sin regarding about Ethan and his team's plan to find the female assassin in two days:Jeremy: You would have thought it would have been difficult to find an assassin like her in two days, but she was as easy to find as Shaquille O'Neal in a sea of Peter Dinklages. *ding*
- The sentence: A sandstorm (cue Darude Sandstorm)
Benji: Love the jet!
- When the team is going into the plane for Mumbai:
Ethan: Wait 'till you see the car! (voice changes to Batman's) Chicks love the car.
- This gem:
Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation
- Jeremy's comment on the plane scene:Jeremy: If you think that I'm not going to remove 5 sins for this badassery, you are dead wrong. (-5 sins)
- His comment on where the Austrian Chancellor is seated during the opera scene:
- While Ford and another soldier are trying to escape a burning train heading their way while on the train tracks:Jeremy: We interrupt this Godzilla movie to bring you Stand by Me.
- While Ford and Elle are kissing and then the phone rings:Jeremy: Ringing phone prevents Elizabeth Olsen from saying "Yes" to the question, "Have you driven a Ford lately?"
Kong: Skull Island
- As two soldiers run away from Kong, one tells the other to "run to the side":Jeremy: The guy yelling did NOT go to the Prometheus School of Running Away From Things but his partner...guess where HE went?
- After Liu Kang does a handstand tumble-flip thing over a short rock formation:Jeremy: Well, hell, I can do that. (ding)
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation
The Mummy Returns
- "Also, it's never a good sign when your 8-year-old son grabs a picture of an older man you've never met and says, 'Hey! I know him!'"
National Treasure: Book of Secrets
- While looking at one of the desks made from the Resolute in 1880Jeremy: Let me ask you this question: If this desk was built in 1880, and the Statue of Liberty replica was built in 1889, how the F*CKING GODDAMN PISS HELL does John Wilkes Booth have a diary in 1865 that points to ANY of this s*it? *ding*
- "They programmed his mind to make him go to Las Vegas..." "Is this for real? They just performed Inception on this guy while passing him on the street?"
- After already pointing out a fleet of Contrived Coincidences and improbable "tricks" throughout the movie, the protagonists get past a cop. "The amount of convenience in this scene is overwhelming. They predicted every single move this cop would make in a fight. If they can do that, why do they need to do these magic shows and sh*t? I mean, they're basically gods!"
Now You See Me 2
- "It must be a pretty sad world where "magic debunker" is an actual thing you can get famous doing. Someone who takes the fun out of every damn thing. It's almost like getting famous for being a 'Santa Claus Isn't Real' Informer and CinemaSins."
- Jeremy can only sigh when he sees "Harry Potter" make his appearance as the flamboyant billionaire.
- Jeremy is amazed with all of the luxury Thaddeus has while in prison.
- After one of the Kaiju breaks through the Sydney Wall:Jeremy: Why are you surprised? Why is anyone surprised? You built a giant wall to try and keep out something that eats boats and giant robots for breakfast.
- As a Jaeger wrestles with a Kaiju in Hong Kong City's harbor, they destroy several huge freight containers, to which Jeremy exclaims, "Aw man, my f*cking Xbox ONE was in there!"
- At one point, the Jaeger loses contact with the Kaiju and can't pinpoint it.Jeremy: How can you possibly lose track of a Kaiju? This is even worse than when the military kept losing track of Godzilla.
- Later, after they destroy the Kaiju and celebrate their victory, one of the Jaeger members exclaims, "It's pregnant!" when seeing a baby Kaiju, prompting Jeremy to remark: "We don't have nearly enough similarities to Godzilla in this movie; let's add some more."
- Towards the end, a bunch of helicopters go out over the water to rescue the two survivors in a life raft:Jeremy: "Hey boss, how many choppers should we send out to pick up the two survivors?" "F*ck it, all of 'em!"
Pacific Rim: Uprising
- Jeremy starts off the video completely blindsided by the poor quality of the narration:Jake: Most of the world has recovered. But a few coastal cities never did and the world is picking up the pieces.Jeremy: DID A F*CKING MIDDLE SCHOOLER WRITE THIS?!
- During a chase scene:Jake: HEY! Get back here with that!Jeremy: I would have removed 1000 sins if that actually worked.
- "If I spliced in a scene from a Transformers sequel, you wouldn't even notice, would you?"
- Jeremy claims that he wrote a dozen jokes each about how this movie is a mix of Transformers, Power Rangers and Godzilla. Which means it gets 36 sins at once.
- During an action sequence:Jeremy: Unecessary slow-mo of Zack Synder meets unecessary building destruction of Michael Bay. Zackle Bay? Mikey Snyder? Zamichael Synbay?
- "I liked this movie better when it was called Starship Ender's Troopers Aliens Kingsman's Game."
- Upon seeing the contents of a fridge:Jeremy: Oh yeah, everyone has that shelf in the fridge that holds multiple cans of whipped cream which is right in front of the beer, which is in front of a bunch of lemons out in the open. I call it the whipbeerlemon shelf.
- During the Jaeger fight:Jeremy: Rock Em Sock Em No-Bots!
- When Jeremy hears the term "Gravity Swing":Jeremy: Pop quiz! Is "Gravity Swing" A) a space traveler's sex appartus, B) A newfangled rock projectile device, C) an electro-swing act out of Billings, Montana or D) some techno-babble that a screenwriter made up that means ultimately nothing?
- "Holy sh*t, that Jaeger was piloted by Meatwad!"
- Jeremy theorises that the plan to unlease the Kajiu was set into motion because "Charlie Day was mad that Fist Fight didn't do well at the box office."
- During a scene of random city destruction:Jeremy: Movie saves money by using B-roll footage from Tommy Lee Jones's Volcano.
- The final sin:Newt: YOU THINK IT'S OVER?! WE'RE JUST GOING TO KEEP COMING AGAIN AND AGAIN!
- The constant remarks that the Paranormal ghost/demon is more of an annoyance than an actual threat.
- Jeremy getting progressively more bored and annoyed with the series' Leave the Camera Running style.
Paranormal Activity 2
- Jeremy's sheer rage at all the nothing happening in the second movie.
- PrANkSter dEa-MOn'S FUNiest HoME ViDja's: Jeremy plays Yakety Sax over the paranormal occurrences with a Laugh Track as though the audience is cheering on the demon as he/she messes with the main characters.
Paranormal Activity 3
- "Welcome to Paranormal Activity 3, the movie where you are literally watching paint dry."
- Jeremy threatening to add 50 sins to the film automatically if Micah shows up, and adding a sin for having to say his name.Jeremy: #MicahIsADouche
- Jeremy pointing out how weird and creepy it is that Katie and Kristi have had a tape containing the beginning of their mother and stepfather's sex tape laying around for most of their lives.
- Jeremy shows what the closed captioning is showing for the scene of Dennis walking down the sidewalk for 30 seconds:[crickets chirping]
- In regards to Toby "showing up" again at the end:Jeremy: Ok so is, like, the grandma in charge of Toby? Is Toby the demon who was impregnating the girls to have their ghost babies, that they then have no memory of? Is it a family ghost that went from, generation to generation? Why was the mother skipped? So many questions. But mostly (throws up the [crickets chirping] caption, accompanied by... guess)
Paranormal Activity 4
- "Movie series blah blah blah video game table tennis."
- "OH F*CK! A CHAIR!"
- "There's a shadow! Now f*ck your face."
- "Watching this movie at 2x speed is a slightly improved experience over watching it in normal speed. That's not as much a sin as it is a helpful tip. Which was a show we planned on producing but had to cancel it because "Cinema Tips" was already taken by an adult entertainment company."
- Jeremy theorizes that Alex's parents aren't home at 1 in the morning because their marriage counselor was a vampire.
- "There's a 15-year-old girl in our yard! Send...EVERYONE!!!"
- "Percy just 'saved' Grover from a lifetime of sex with Rosario Dawson."
- Jeremy's Sarcasm Mode reaction to the hilariously unconvincing sparring.Jeremy: Why are they practising bad stage fighting? Are they putting on a play later? Is it like a drama camp? *ding*
Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters
- Jeremy's general disdain for the narration.Percy: At first, I didn't believe it either.
Jeremy: Neither did I! Oh, wait, did I miss the part where you explain what the hell you're talking about? *ding* Also, narration. *ding*
Percy: Sometimes, these gods have children with humans-children called half-bloods.
Jeremy: And Voldemort hates those assholes. *ding*
- The scene where the cab splits in two. Jeremy says that is so obnoxious, he gives it five sins.
- The narrator's increasing love of Alexandra Daddario.Jeremy: "Alexandra Daddario is so hot she makes my body hurt" cliche.
- About Governor Swann..."Dustin Hoffman was apparently unavailable to play the old man with a long dark wig and red coat and white scarf."
- Near the beginning, Jeremy criticizes the British soldiers' formations and presentation of arms, which he notes are not at all straight at all:"Have they never practiced these before? Have they not seen the opening to A Few Good Men?"
- This is referenced again later on, when Jack Sparrow's newly-formed crew all look toward the ship they will be commandeering:"These mostly-drunk pirate losers have better alignment and timing than the f*cking British soldiers do."
- This is referenced again later on, when Jack Sparrow's newly-formed crew all look toward the ship they will be commandeering:
- Jeremy ridicules Gov. Swann's inconsistency on attempting to kill Jack Sparrow, which happens three times."At first, the governor wants to shoot Jack on sight without knowing who he is or what he's done. Then when he finds out Jack is a pirate, he wants to hang him. Why the change? To delay Jack's death so he can escape later?"
- Then, as Sparrow escapes, Gov. Swann asks Norrington and his men to shoot Sparrow..."Will you make up your f*cking mind? We didn't shoot him before because you said 'hang him,' remember?"
- Finally...Norrington: Mr. Sparrow has a dawn appointment with the gallows.
Jeremy: But I thought the order was to shoot him now.
- Then, as Sparrow escapes, Gov. Swann asks Norrington and his men to shoot Sparrow...
- Jeremy takes into account some of Norrington's men as they try to shoot Sparrow:Jeremy: (pointing out one soldier) This guy's closing his eyes while firing. (pointing out a second soldier) This guy's got his head turned completely to the side. (pointing out a third soldier) And this guy appears to be three feet tall.
- Will Turner slams a hatchet down on a map, prompting Jeremy to call him "a dick to maps".
- As Sparrow and Turner switch back and forth between the Dauntless and the Interceptor to shove off to sea, while being pursued by the soldiers, who also abandon ship as they pursue them, there's this:"Is it naval policy to abandon ship completely when you search other ships for two f*cking criminals?"
- In the climax, after the curse is lifted, and Pintel and Ragetti are held at gunpoint by the pair of bumbling soldiers...Jeremy: Bumbling idiot pair number one, meet bumbling idiot pair number two.
- At first, the final sentence for this movie is "Tortuga", but Will Turner is heard saying, "That's not good enough!", so the sentence is immediately changed to "Davy Jones' Locker" instead, to which Jack Sparrow is heard saying, "Not sure I deserved that."
Dead Man's Chest
At World's End
- "Everything wrong with Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End In... the minutes... oh the minutes!!"
- Jeremy calls out all of the singing in the opening of the film."TOO MUCH SINGING!"
- In the same vein, in the opening scene, before the prisoners are executed, their singing as one leads to this:Jeremy: Wow, movie goes full Les Mis before the 4 minute mark!
- In the same vein, in the opening scene, before the prisoners are executed, their singing as one leads to this:
- When Sparrow is first seen in the purgatory..."They told Johnny Depp he was still in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. This was the result."
- These:"It's pretty obvious the thought was, 'You know what's better than Jack Sparrow? TWO Jack Sparrows! And why should we stop there?'""It's pretty obvious the thought was, 'You know what's better than one rock that's actually a crab? TWO rocks that are actually crabs! And why should we stop there?'"
- When the crew arrives on the shore of Davy Jones's Locker:Gibbs: This truly is a godforsaken place.Jeremy: You mean, the beach? Yeah, it looks awful.
- This:Barbossa: What are you doing?Jack Sparrow: What are YOU doing?Barbossa: No, what ARE you doing?Jack Sparrow: What are YOU doing?Jeremy: Skip!
- "Pirates of the Caribbean: The Desolation of Smaug".
- His wondering how the Pirate Lords managed to capture Calypso in the first place. His guess? They put our Reese's Pieces and had her follow them into a trap.
- This moment, during the storm as the climactic battle is about to take place:Davy Jones: Calypso...?
Jeremy: Is she in the sky now? Did she not just turn into a bunch of billion or so crabs and dive into the sea? What was the point of that s*it?
Davy Jones: AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!
- "It is perhaps fitting that one of the final battles will take place in an abyss of rapidly rotating water, because it simulates the effect of being in a toilet."
- At the end of the review:
On Stranger Tides
- Near the beginning, a subtitle reads the opening to be set in Cadiz, Spain, which prompts this remark:"Not to be confused with Cadiz, Kentucky... Wait, there is a Cadiz, Kentucky? Well, f*ck."
- Later, the scene shifts to London, England, according to another appropriate subtitle, "just in case you confused it with London Fletcher."
- "Barbossa's qualifications for being the captain of the king's ship are: communication skills, previous sailing experience, and being in all the other movies."
- Quite possibly one of the best stingers ever made in Cinemasins:Theodore: (Holds up a giant England flag in front of himself, towards the Spanish troops) This land is hereby forever claimed in the glorious name of his majesty, King George- (Suddenly shot the stomach by the Spaniard)
Spaniard: NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!
Dead Men Tell No Tales
- "This movie should be 90 minutes, but like the Gluttony victim in Seven, they overstuffed it until it exploded."
- At the Paul McCartney cameo:
- During the whirlpool scene:
- One of the stingers- Yoda raising the Black Pearl.
- "Will-o-the-wisp Reese's Pieces."
- Early on, Merida says, in voiceover narration, that she could never get away with anything. As she is eating an apple while saying this, Jeremy blames it on said apple, which, of course, makes her "look like an asshole."
- Moments later, Merida is seen stealing an apple, which makes her guilty of "DOUBLE asshole duty in two minutes".
- Two moments during the archery contest that Jeremy thinks are phallic metaphors. The first is this:Merida: And I'll be shooting from my own hand!
Jeremy: This is probably as blunt of a masturbation metaphor as it gets!
- The second comes when Merida's arrow perfectly splits another arrow in half as it goes into the target:"This is probably as blunt of an emasculation metaphor as it gets!"
- The second comes when Merida's arrow perfectly splits another arrow in half as it goes into the target:
- "Aaaaaand they finally did it: Disney remade Brother Bear and made it into Mother Bear."
- When Elinor-as-a-bear tries to catch fish with her mouth like a real bear, Jeremy thinks this scene has committed three sins at the same time:"She thinks bears fish just by opening their mouths... this fish jumps DIRECTLY into her not-moving open mouth... AND she spits it out like it's gross! Lady, you are a BEAR now — get with the program!"
A Bug's Life
- "I hate it when someone gives away the ending."Jeremy: He gets eaten by birds. The ants use Flik's inventions and live happily ever after.
- Jeremy notes that the technique the bird uses to feed Hopper to her chicks is nothing like in real life.Jeremy: This technique here promises to shove this big grasshopper down the middle chick's beak, leaving the other two hungry and this one in need of surgery.
- Sentence: A Bug's Life
- Jeremy's impression of Count Von Count.Lightning McQueen: He has a Piston Cup? ...three Piston Cups?Jeremy: No, FOUR Piston Cups! Ah ah ah ah. *ding*
- Moments later...
- "In this world, you get a ticket for running too fast." *ding*
- This:Mr. Tex: There's more to racing than winning.
Jeremy: Name one thing. *ding*
- After Hudson's past as a race-car is revealed.Jeremy: I have never known a time in sports history when an athlete was still in his prime and got completely ignored just because that person suffered a season-ending injury. You'd probably STILL have an owner who would pay for Babe Ruth to be on their team if they could afford the exhuming costs.
- During the credits:Mack: Wait a minute here...They're just using the same actor over and over! What kind of cut-rate production is this?!Jeremy: Mack is right about the cut-rate production, but for the wrong reasons.
- This moment:Sally: You never take Mater to any of your races!
Jeremy: That's race-ist! *ding*
- This:Francisco: WHAT IS HAPPENING?!
Jeremy: Movie speaks for the audience. And it does so expertly. *ding*
- Jeremy carries on a metaphor just a bit too far, and it's hilarious.Jeremy: This is some maniacal s*it right here, tying a man to a—wait a second, how the F*CK did CARS get up here to even tie him into place? This movie gives me a rage boner, and I'm gonna f*ck it HARD!!!
- When Mater accuses Miles Axelrod for being the true mastermind behind the main conflict of the film:Jeremy: Whaaaaaaaaaaat!?
- When Lightning feels bad after reading Mater's letter:Lightning: I didn't want him to leave.
Jeremy: Yes, you did. End of sin.
- During the opening credits showing Lightning's winning streak:Lightning: See ya next week, Cal!
Jeremy: I'm pretty sure that Cars 4 is all about how Cal has had enough and becomes a serial killer.
- "Cars 3: Get Off My Lawn!"
- This scene:Lightning: That's just it, Mater. I don't know. I feel like I'm all out of ideas.Jeremy: Pixar's new slogan.
- This:Ramone: Hey, McQueen! You can't race in prime!
Jeremy: That's prime-ist!
- And this:Rosco: Rule #3: No cursing. It's Family Night.
- This bit:
- At one point, Jeremy politely requests the CinemaSins video editors for a image of a middle finger to wiggle back and forth over footage of the movie. They happily comply.
- During Lightning's apology dance, Jeremy sins the fact that people actually like this movie.
- The last sin of the video:Lightning: I sure am glad that Mr. Tex bought Rusteze.
Jeremy: Well, that wrapped up nicely. Now on to Cars 4: Cal's Revenge!
- As Miguel dresses up as El Santo with his great grandmother:
- During every Shout-Out to other Pixar films, we get this Running Gag:Jeremy: The inside jokes in these Pixar movies and movies in general are becoming distracting.
- This moment:Enrique: You will join us in the workshop!Jeremy: Nike.
- As Imelda smashes a computer with her shoe:Jeremy: Cambridge Analytica.
- The Running Gag about Jeremy getting increasingly annoyed by Dante the dog.
- One of the outtakes plays Thriller over the Land of the Dead.
- When one of the fish parents learns that Marlin is a clownfish...Fish: You're a clownfish? You're funny right? Hey, tell us a joke!
Jeremy: That's fish-racist! *ding*
- When Marlin and Dory are hopping down the pier from Nigel, Jeremy notes that "It's the Prometheus School of Running Away from Things FOR THE SECOND TIME IN THIS MOVIE!" (The first was when they were swimming away from the sunken ship which was toppling over them.)
- "Jesus, another fish has gone missing?! This makes me feel like the NSA dude at the end of The Hunt for Red October: 'You've lost ANOTHER submarine?!'"
- Jeremy becomes tired of the film's coincidences in the film's second act, forcing Chris to step in and do the "<sigh>" gag for him. Also, instead of sighing, Chris actually says "Sigh."
- This moment:Bailey: It's your destiny, Destiny.
Jeremy: S*it writes itself. *ding*
- Another moment:Fluke: (telling Marlin how to befriend Becky) All you have to do is imprint with her, mate.
Jeremy: Aww man, they dragged Twilight: Breaking Dawn 2 into this didn't they? (ding)
- As Dory, Nemo and Marlin all jump from one open-topped fish tank to another toward the one full of blue tangs..."Who do you think made sure all these open-topped fish tanks were in the right order for this progression of jumps: the screenwriters or God?"
- This...Dory: What is so great about plans? I never had a plan!
Jeremy: Thing that Andrew Stanton told the writers when this movie began production somehow finds its way into the script.
- It leads to Jeremy ridiculing the messages in this movie as terrible for kids. First...Dory: The best things happen by chance, because that's life!
Jeremy: Is this movie's message seriously that we shouldn't plan for stuff and just take life as it comes?! While I recognize the problems with over-planning, this is a terrible, terrible message to send to kids.
- Second...Jenny: You can do whatever you put your mind to.
Jeremy: Another terrible message to send to kids! Because this s*it is patently untrue! What if my kid sees this movie, then "puts his mind to" jumping off a bridge to fly? Huh?! HUH?!?!
- Jeremy calls out the amount of Artistic License used in the film's climax, where the Marine Life Institute truck careens down the road without hitting other cars and jumps multiple concrete highway barriers and still keeps going, all while the fish tanks never fall and break and the fish never get killed, only bounced from one tank to another. It leads to this:"It's like this movie was made just to test my patience. And the movie has won."
- At the very end, Jeremy decides to remove a sin from this movie for its fun visuals during the end credits, which he describes as something more movies should do.
- After the review, there is a Bonus Round called "20 Reasons Finding Nemo and Finding Dory are the same movie", in which Couch Tomato compares identical scenes from both movies and ultimately adds on 20 more sins to the overall total.
- Also, the "bonus round" music from Super Mario World plays throughout.
- One of the stingers:Frozone: You tell me where my suit is, woman! We are talking about the greater good!
- "Rick Dicker."
- This:Mr. Incredible: Trampoline me!Jeremy: Whoa, Bob! I thought that sort of thing was just for anniversaries and special occasions only!
- When Frozone saves the monorail:Jeremy: Deus Ice Monorailia?
- At the Endeavour's backstory:Jeremy: An eccentric billionaire who is interested in superheroes because his parents were shot and killed in a random act of violence? Sound Batmiliar- I mean familibat, I mean bats fa-Batman-bats bats!
- Mr. Incredibly Sexist.
- This bit:Bystander: Marry me, Elastigirl!Jeremy: Proposed polygamy.
- This:Violet: So mom's going out there...illegally...to talk about why she shouldn't be illegal.
- At the raccoon's human-like behaviour:Jeremy: This scene's officially pushed me Over The Hedge.
- Jeremy gets momentairly distracted from a sin:Dicker: This is Dicker.Jeremy: Dicker?! I DON'T EVEN KNOW HER! AHAHAHAHA! Ahem.
- Jeremy is disturbed at Dash's "visual bloodlust" during the scene where Mr. Incredible controls his car remotely.
- Some of the most biting sarcasm ever:Jeremy: So, you're telling me that the female aloof character who always seemed a little too non-chalant and who's name can literally be pronounced as "Evil Endeavour" was the bad guy?! I am shocked! Shocked, I say!
- When Elastigirl is in a cold room, preventing her from using her powers:Jeremy: So her kryptonite is the month of January.
- In response to Dash accidentally getting the Incredibile to follow the boat:
- Jeremy gives interesting names to some of the background superheroes including The "Which Way Does The Batteries Go" Twins, Fluffy Earbud Man and Captain Crochet.
- One of the outtakes:Brick: MY NAME IS BRICK.Elastigirl: Oh! Um, nice to meet you.Brick (Anchorman): People seem to like me because I'm really nice!
- "Eat me, I'm organic" is now Jeremy's new pickup line.
- "Sadness imprisonment."
- Jeremy sins the fact that the father is thinking about a full game of hockey on dinner, deeming it racist and impractical.
- Jeremy thinks The Nothing is responsible for the perils in the film's climax.
- Jeremy is heard genuinely laughing hard during the 'girl alert' scene at the end, which also results in a sin removal. The subtitles misrepresent just how much he enjoyed it.Jeremy: Ha ha ha ha ha.
- Two of the stingers:
- When Riley gets her first memory and Joy sends it on its way: "WELCOME TO REGAL."note
- Toddler Riley refusing to eat her broccoli is accompanied with a certain clip from "Another Brick In The Wall".
- This:Joy: Here comes the tickle monster!
Jeremy: Tickle monster. *ding*
- When baby Riley is running naked around her house at the beginning of the movie:Jeremy: Well, I'm definitely on some kind of watchlist now. Thanks, Pixar. *ding*
- When the Golden Gate Bridge is shown:
- "These CDA guys were all going #2 at the same time."
- "Car with teeth inspires the two worst Pixar movies ever."
- Jeremy calls Mike "Mikey" instead of Mike.
- In one of the outtakes, during the entrance of the monsters at the scare floor, "Little Green Bag" plays, parodying Reservoir Dogs.
- In one of the outtakes, when Mike replays Waternoose's confession, the "Get your ass to mars." recording from Total Recall plays instead.
- During the opening credits sequence, Jeremy questions the fact that scarers have trading cards with this:Jeremy: There are trading cards for best scarers who are essentially factory workers. This monster society is pretty big on Communist propaganda.
- This bit:Mike: We have everything we need to win right here. (points to chest)note .Squishy: Heart...Jeremy: Waaaaait. Where's Mike's heart? He's like, 80 percent mouth!
- One of the outtakes dubs over the scene where Oozma Kappa gets covered in paint with the prom scene from Carrie, complete with rotating images of people laughing.
- This bit:Remy: I'm a rat...which means life is very hard for myself.Jeremy: That's Ratsict.
- Jeremy is shocked that Gusteau died from a bad review, noting that he has recieved "dozens of hate mail, angry tweets and at least 2 maps to death traps" and hasn't died from it yet.
- Jeremy calls out the saucier not being at his workstation, sarcastically wonders if he was on a smoke break then realises that "they ARE in France."
- "Linguini went to the Mario Batelli school of workplace behaviour.
- Jeremy is pissed that Linguini's "sh*thole apartment" somehow has a view of the Effiel Tower.
- At Gusteau's new marketing campaign which includes a Chinese version of him:
- When Jeremy hears Linguini saying the film's title:Jeremy: Roll rodents.
- "Pizza Planet serves a 128-ounce Mega Gulp." *ding* "Also, burgers." *ding again*
- As Buzz runs from a globe rolling his way, Jeremy remarks, "Ah, I see Buzz Lightyear also went to the Prometheus school of running away from things." *ding*
- When Bo Peep says of Buzz, "I found my moving buddy," Jeremy exclaims, "What a whore!"
- "Conveniently, the Chuck-E-Cheese-like Pizza Planet also delivers and just happens to drive at this abandoned gas station where I heard a guy got murdered one time." *ding*
- "I'm okay with talking, sentient toys in a movie. I really am. But I am NOT okay with talking, sentient toys that can run fast enough to catch up to a truck moving at even the slowest speed." *ding*
- When Woody threw the Christmas lights from Sid's house to Andy's house, Jeremy claims that the throw is impossible for a human to make that even Dude Perfect would need 20 to 30 takes.
- In the family car, "Hakuna Matata" plays on the radio, which prompts this remark:"Disney, didn't we get enough of that song the year before this came out?" *ding*
Toy Story 2
- As Woody worries that his hat is missing and he can't go with Andy to camp without it:Jeremy: Does he have ANY reason he can't go to camp without it?! 'Cause if not, Woody needs a psychiatrist more than he needs Andy.
- Suggesting that the joke book "Real Real Big Trucks by Cousin A.J. Joe Jimbob" should be about 300 pages lighter.
- "Super well-trained, toy-friendly dog is utterly clueless when his best toy-friend falls off in the yard sale, because the script called for conflict!"
- Jeremy removes two sins with no explanation when Rex chases the car:Rex: Dinosaur overboard! *removes two sins*
- Jeremy calls Slinky great at Cinema Sins for calling out an inaccurate illustration, and when Hamm responds, "Picky, picky, picky", he is pronounced great at being a critic of Cinema Sins.
- This:Geri: You can't rush art.Jeremy: You hear that, Marvel? *ding*
- In response to Joan Cusack voicing Jessie..."Do you get the feeling that Joan Cusack signed up for this because she thought it was the sequel to Toys? Oh wait, nobody would do that. Stupid question."
- From the moment the Prospector is shown, Jeremy knows that he is the villain simply because he has the voice of Sideshow Bob.
Toy Story 3
- Andy playing with his toys realizes that Jeremy really misses his childhood. He removes a sin in doing so.
- Sentence: Down (Hell)
- "Russell's persistence leads me to believe he thinks Carl is the only old person in this town."
- Jeremy is appalled by the way that Carl can use balloons to lift his house into the air. After questioning how he was able to conceal the balloons so well and have so many that it can lift it into the air so that it can rip the house off the foundation and its connected utilities (he didn't bother to disconnect the water and electricity beforehand), he then concludes:"Way to use an increasingly-scarce resource to fly your house irresponsibly, you jackass."
- Jeremy thinks that "numerous military and police would have been called when they heard reports of a flying house using balloons, but fortunately for Carl, this took place during Taco Tuesday and no one called or cared."
- At the opening shot of garbage stacked as high as the tallest buildings, creating their own skyline, Jeremy removes three sins from the movie."It's the anti-Cinema Sins movie really, since so much of it is anti-'what other movies do.'"
- Instead of going down -3 sins, it goes to -5, prompting Jeremy to remark, "See? Even the sin counter doesn't obey!"
- "The 'Twinkies and cockroaches survive the Apocalypse' cliches finally get married and have a baby."
- At the shot of the 20th Century Fox logo at the very start...Jeremy: Even in 1968, the Fox logo took 15 goddamn seconds, proving this logo s*it is a long-standing Hollywood tradition of bullying audiences.
- Jeremy removes two sins for the 25-minute opening scene, in spite of "the weird 2 minutes of opening exposition":"Disorienting without explaining too much, long takes with little-to-no dialogue... This movie is WAY better than you remember it being, is what I'm saying."
- Jeremy sins the movie for it "overestimating [his] tolerance for watching people walking."
Planet of the Apes (2001)
- When Leo kisses Ari:Jeremy: Ewww...
- Then when Leo kisses Daena:Jeremy [even more disgusted]: Ewww!
- Then when Leo kisses Daena:
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
- "Human... leave. NOW!"
- Jeremy: Wow, this is exactly what was said to me after my first sexual encounter.
- One of the outtakes is Caesar dropping Koba in slow motion while dramatic music plays...only for Koba to abruptly hit a wire and yell as he continues to fall; then the slow motion and dramatic music continues like nothing happens...only THEN to abruptly crash into ANOTHER object, and then continues to fall with the slow motion and dramatic music. It's much funnier than it sounds here.
- Sin 37: The part where Jeremy comments on how all that Charlie is doing during The Purge is using the charred camera baby doll.Jeremy: Man, this Charlie kid has to be Purged someway, somehow, tonight. I mean, it's legal, right? What an asshole this kid is.
- Sin 69: The stranger following around Charlie's charred baby camera doll.Jeremy: I'll follow you anywhere, remote-controlled Satan.
- Sin 114: The stranger distracting the Sandins' neighbors with Charlie's charred baby camera doll.Jeremy: The homeless guy found Charlie's burned peeping RC baby and decided, "I'll use this as a distraction first, because my surprise entrance will be even stupider that way."
The Purge: Anarchy
- Jeremy points out how Eva's father's note is written in all caps, and thus wonders why his narration isn't yelling at us.
- Liz's constant need to explain what was happening in lieu of a narrator annoys Jeremy to no end.
- At seeing a little girl covered in blood:Jeremy: Carrie?
- Jeremy just laughs when a guy is shot up just a split second after a love confession.
- Jeremy frequently wonders why if ALL crime is legal, people are only committing murder instead of more profitable crimes like looting.
- "Stop!"MC Hammer: Hammertime!
The Purge: Election Year
- Jeremy constantly mentioning how stupid is it that the Electoral College is still a thing in the Dystopian [[20MinutesInTheFuture near future]] of The Purge.
- Jeremy about the murder tourists:Jeremy: Because we aren't clever anymore.
- Also, his reaction to the first murder tourist's bizarre accent.
- When Roan notices a drone behind them.Roan: It's behind you. 13 yards back, 15 yards up.Jeremy: Senator Roan is kinda cocky about her distance estimating skills.
The First Purge
- The first sin:Jeremy: I've got something you can purge, Hollywood. It's logos.
- During the opening of the film:Jeremy: Can't think of a clever or compelling way to give the audience the information they need for the movie? Now, with "Newspoition", you don't have to! Just throw up some vague, split-screen news clips and some reporterish narration and you're good to go! Newspoition! When easy means more than excellent!
Jeremy: This just in; an extra 45 sins added!
- When it happens a second time, Jeremy responds with:
- This bit:Title Card: Staten Island; New YorkJeremy: In case you confused it with Gilligan's Island.
- This:Citizen: Let's just get through this purge bullsh*t so things can go back to normal!
- This bit:Purger: SKELETOR, PURGE IS ON!
- "Well, they did it. They managed to combine The Purge franchise with the Fast and the Furious franchise. Will Tyrese earn his Purge paycheck?
- One of the outtakes:Nya: There's only five bullets in here?!Selena: Better than a damn spatula!Spatula City Woman: Oh my, where did you get that lovely spatula?
- During the final skit of the video we hear "Angel" playing over the scene where Alice fights the zombie dogs. The best part is at the very, VERY end."Hi, I'm Sarah McLachlan."
Resident Evil: Apocalypse
- "You know it's a Rocky movie when they use previous footage of a Rocky movie in order to emphasise that this is a Rocky movie...but wait...doesn't that mean the first Rocky isn't a Rocky movie?!
- Jeremy adds boxing stats over a shot of Adonis's mother, with hilarious highlights such as "71 knockouts", "title winner in Greece" and "former star of the Cosby Show".
- This bit:
- Adonis: I want you to train me!Rocky Balboa: I don't do that anymore!
- Jeremy adds 5 sins for the movie ruining the Rocky III ending by giving away the mystery of Apollo and Rocky's fight.
- "Running! Jumping! Push-ups! Pull-ups! Montage! Excitement!"
- "I'm amazed this movie doesn't end with Adonis getting 500 ST Ds from sleeping in Paulie's bedsheets."
- "I see Adonis has decided to take Rocky's approach to boxing: get punched in the face a bunch of times and still come out a winner."
- During one of Rocky's speeches to Adonis:
- Jeremy: Rocky ramblings.
- Jeremy almost removes a sin, complete with sound effect, but eventually decides against it.
- Announcer: I did not expect to see this back-to-back punching!Jeremy: Except for everyone who's ever seen a Rocky movie.
- One of the outtakes adds Mike Tyson's Punch-Out sound effects to the Adonis-Ricky fight.
- "I sure am glad this movie keeps reminding us what year it is in every scene, or else I would just think every scene is a new year and it will be 2156 by the time the movie's over."
- "This [X] escaping the [disaster] scene is exactly like that [Y] escaping the [disaster] scene ... you know ... THREE MINUTES AGO!!"
- "Danny Glover isn't too old for this sh*t in this scene.
- From the bit when Charlie's telling Jackson about the upcoming apocalypse:Jackson: Nobody could keep that big a secret, Charlie.Jeremy: Tell that to the people hiding Tupac.
- A variant on the "eat an apple" gag, involving Charlie Frost:Jeremy: The director said, "Why don't you eat a pickle? It'll make you look even crazier!"
- When an earthquake tears through a store and pulls Kate and Gordon apart:Jeremy: Devastating, cataclysmic Earth event has a sense of humor.
- Jeremy pointing out two people in the background, ONE WITH FU*KING HEADPHONES, before the crack destroys the store, as well as the fact that absolutely no one was in the background in the next shot.
- Near the end, when the apocalypse has ended and the calendar has been reset to "January 27, Year 0001":Jeremy: "Oh, f*ck you."
- During the outtakes, they overdub Anheuser with the dialogue from Dr. Strangelove's "ten women to each male" line.
The Day After Tomorrow
- The "A Roland Emmerich film" credit is sinned without comment.
- Sin 131: The scene where people are smiling at each other after the rescue.Jeremy: This unlikely couple got married shortly after this helicopter ride. They divorced 5 hours later. Wah-wah.
- And then he starts to say the same thing about J.D. and Brian in Sin 132, implying that they're gay for each other.
- Jeremy's utter bewilderment at the film trying to create tension against cold.
- "Yeah, shut up, only black guy I know!"
- During the "What's the Damage" video, Jeremy lists one item as "one goddamn Chrysler Building".
- Jeremy shouts "White! House! Submarine!" in his "Things! Excitement!" tone while the movie displays different angles of the White House and a submarine with white flashes in-between shots.
- "The 10-to-15 giant city-sized alien spacecraft hovering conspicuously over every major city in the world? You have a bad feeling about that?"
Independence Day: Resurgence
- This moment:Dylan: I couldn't save her, it's too late.Jeremy: [in mocking fashion] I wasn't jiggy enough. *ding*
- Another moment:Dylan: [while fighting the alien queen] Get ready for a close encounter, bitch!
- Jeremy refers to one of the characters as "Discount John Oliver."
- Another moment:Patricia: [while shooting at the alien queen] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!Jeremy: [calmly] Ah. *ding*
- When President Lanford's reading her speech in preparation for the "celebration":President Lanford: For 20 years the world has seen no armed conflict. Nations have put their petty differences aside.Jeremy: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha [deep breath] hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
- The very first sin of the video:Title: A Roland Emmerich FilmJeremy: That's not a selling point!
- This moment:Benjamin: Forgive us for our sins.Jeremy: I'll see what I can do.
- When Benjamin is told he has nothing to be ashamed of, Jeremy cuts back to him mercilessly hacking a soldier to death with an axe and just laughs.
- The film's director, Roland Emmerich, joins the distinguished group of people involved in filmmaking whose name's mere appearance in the credits warrants a sin.
- Pulling out a 5th Avenue candy bar illicits an annoyed sigh and a sin from Jeremy.
- "Human organs have always been against eBay's terms of service agreement."
- "Um, no. Yeah, he's a murderer. By law. In like every state and every civilized country... and probably even Idaho."
- "Donnie Wahlberg's like, Why cant I get a call from Scorsese? I was in The Sixth Sense! Mark though the Vietnam War was still going on in 1988! Give me a friggin break, here! But Donnie's at a crossroads in his career here, at a point directly between The Sixth Sense and dating Jenny McCarthy. And believe it or not, those are the only three data points we need to create an accurate line graph of his career trajectory."
- "Ah, you haven't witnessed true cinema until you've seen one of the New Kids on the Block smash his own foot with a toilet tank cover."
- "Saw III inserts an erectile disfunction ad in the middle of their movie."
- "It takes over half an hour for this movie to Saw III."
- During one of the torture scenes:Jigsaw: Do you fantasize that those accountable will pay?
Jeremy: Jesus Christ, is he Freddy Kruger now?!
- "When it's got people screaming and bleeding from multiple orfices, it must be Saw!"
- When the movie features a flashback:Jeremy: Previously on Saw II- Wait, is it Saw II? Or Saw III? Or...maybe it's both?! F*ck me.
- While Eric is being tortured:Eric: DO YOU F*CKING HEAR ME?! F*CK YOU, YOU F*CKING MOTHERF*CKER!
Jeremy: Wow, Limp Bizkit concerts got ultra-terrible by 2007.
- During yet another gruesome death scene:Jeremy: Boy, I bet the writer's room for these movies was a barrel of laughs!
- "Saw, also known as the instrument that was used to edit these movies."
- At one point, Jeremy doesn't sin the death scenes and instead edits in cartoon sound effects to them.
- Sentence: *Being in charge of continuity for the Saw franchise* ("I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate!")
- Jeremy's response to the "There's a formula to it!" scene?Jeremy: Randy isn't fired immediately. *ding*
- At Wes Craven's cameo:
- During one blatant on the nose moment:
- "[A]lcohol is the real killer. The more you know."
- Jeremy repeatedly points out that the audience at the Stab premiere is way too happy and rowdy for a town where the murders actually occurred.
- "This is the dumbest movie audience I've seen since Jackass."
- During the Romantic Plot Tumor:Jeremy: We are currently looking for the killer, who might be on this very tape. NOW LET'S F*CK!
- Jeremy sins a scene for merely having a soundtrack by Creed.
- Jeremy adds another sin much later on for a Creed poster in a bedroom.
- This bit:Tyson: I want to do something like...LL Cool J's Shakespeare in the Park!Jeremy: One year after Deepest Bluest?! I don't think so.
- At the Jay and Silent Bob Cameo:Jeremy: Hey, remember when this movie crossed over with Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back? Do you think anyone in the audience remembered Scream 3 by the time that movie came out?
- During Steven Stone's note death scene:Ghostface: And that makes me angry!Jeremy: But how did Ghostface know that Joe from Family Guy would be hanging out in this trailer?!
Jeremy: But how would the killer have time to send these faxes, considering he just killed The Tick in the trailer?!
- Seconds later, we get:
Steven Stone: This is Puddy.
- Finally, during the outtakes:
- This bit:Randy: In the third movie of a trilogy, you always have to kill the villain! Blow him up! Freeze him to death!Jeremy: Whoa! Spoiler for Godfather III!
- Jeremy is amused at a newspaper's filler text:Jeremy: "Parents are advised to look out for the Megan." Beware the Megan! The Megan don't f*ck around.
- The final sin:Movie Credit: WITH SPECIAL APPEARANCE BY: JAMIE KENNEDY
- "Irene works for a floating top hat." *ding*
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
- "You know, the difference between RDJ's Sherlock Holmes and Jack Sparrow is...hmm...no, they're exactly the same character."
- This:Maid: He's on a diet of tabacco, coffee and cocoa leaves.
- Jeremy is shocked by the fact that the assassins have grenades and still can't kill Watson.
- The final sin of the video- Sherlock types a question mark after "The End" on a manuscript, leading to:
- One of the outtakes plays 'It Feels Like Christmas' over a shot of London.
- This bit:Judge Bird: What do you do when you find a weed?
Jeremy:: Smoke it?
- As a bird sneezes on Red's popcorn, Jeremy wonders how "this non-Dreamworks movie got so much Shrek in it".
- "Angry Bird briefly forgets how to Bird Angrily."
- When Chuck is in therapy:Chuck: My poem is about a hate crime.
Jeremy:: In an extremely meta moment, Chuck writes about the movie he's currently in.
- "Magic Pork: XXL."
- After Red rallies the other birds to attack:Jeremy:: Roll flocking credits.
- The No Visual Theatre clip at the end.
The Emoji Movie
- The YouTube description is just "sigh".
- This bit:Laughing Emoji: Hahahahaha! I broke my arm! I can see the bone!
- As soon as Poop appears on screen:
- This:Gene: Hashtag Truth.
- During an arguement between Jailbreak and Hi-5:Jailbreak: Zip it, you fingerhead!Jeremy: That's racist!
- Finally, Jeremy gives up on the movie and comments:Jeremy: I tried coming up with a clever way to make fun at how this is impossible, but all I saw was white hot rage. So, let's just add another sin while I try to keep my blood pressure under 3 digits.
- "I swear to God, movie. Just eat Sir Patrick Stewart and die."
- When Gene defies all logic on how a smartphone is supposed to function by somehow stopping a memory wipe, Jeremy finally loses it and lets loose all the frustration that's been building up throughout the movie in a Cluster F-Bomb, which culminates in him giving the movie 100 more sins.
- At the end, when the emojis cheer on Gene:Jeremy: And after this moment, the emoji formerly known as Gene went on to rule Textopolis in one of the longest and most brutal regimes in smartphone history.
- "And the "Andy Garcia in Passengers" Award for the shortest cameo goes to... Sofia Vergara!"
- As Count Dracula sings:Count Dracula: Hush, little baby. Don't say a word...Jeremy: I'm 87% sure the pitch for this movie was "Adam Sandler singing in a weird Dracula voice", immediately followed by 400 studio executives putting down payment on pools and new breasts.
- "This movie answers the age old question: do vampires sh*t?"
- After the second toilet humor joke in a row, Jeremy switches into an old timey radio announcer voice, wondering if the producers can keep it up for the rest of the movie.
- Similar to his Madagascar review, Jeremy eventually gets so fed up, he adds 25 sins for the rest of them.
- This:Count Dracula: Velcome! To Hotel Transylvania!Jeremy: Roll Un-deadits!
- This bit:Frankenstein's Monster: Watch out for fire!
- Jeremy is extremely confused as to why Quasimodo is in the hotel, noting that he's a human with physical deformities and that it misses the whole point of the original story for a cheap gag.
- When Dracula and Johnny are walking together:Johnny: Hey, is that garlic weakness real?Count Dracula: Well, yes. If I eat it, my throat swells.Jeremy: I thought Dracula hated humans. Why is he giving away one of his weaknesses to them? Loose lips sink infantile poorly animated Adam Sandler movies, after all.
- This bit:Johnny: Those monsters are going to kill me!Count Dracula: Not if they think you're a monster too.Johnny: That's kind of racist.Jeremy: Johnny would be excellent at Cinemasins!
- Jeremy refers to Eunice as the Bride of Fran-kenstein.
- During a charade sequence:Jeremy: If I wanted to watch someone flail their arms like an idiot, I'd just watch YouTube vloggers.
- One of the outtakes:Count Dracula: I haven't been out in the human world since...Martha.Frankenstein's Monster: MARTHA! WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAME?!
Hotel Transylvania 2
- During the very poorly paced opening:Jeremy: After a minute of logos, and another 30 seconds of clouds, we take another 20 seconds zooming into the castle? We sure this movie isn't called "Hotel Tranquilvania"?
- When Dracula is dancing with Mavis:Count Dracula: It doesn't matter if he's human, monster or unicorn...Jeremy: Whoa, hold up, Drac! Unicorn marriage is only legal in 4 states so far!
- When Dennis is born:Jeremy: Dracula's Little Dividen.
- During a toilet humour joke:
- This bit:Count Dracula: I'm his Vamp-pa!Frankenstein's Monster: Vamp-pa?Count Dracula: You know. Vampire Grandpa?Jeremy: Hey movie, we'll handle the word combinations here! When you've already got one person doing it, there's no need for a portman-two.
- Jeremy notes that, although the movie is well animated and has cute visual gags here and there, it's just a cartoon version of Grown Ups 2.
- This:Vampire Park Attendant: We had to scale it down because of, um, insurance.Jeremy: (to the tune of Farmers Insurance) We are Vampires! Bum, ba-dum bum bum bum bum!
- During the tower scene:Vampire Park Attendant: Where is the boy's mother?Count Dracula: Oh, she couldn't make it because she's already nutsy cuckoo crazy!Jeremy: What the f*ck?! That's your daughter you're talking about here. What even is this movie?!
- When the blob monster urinates in the bushes:Jeremy: Well, that's a horrifying sight that I will never un-see.
- This:Bela: HUMANS! DON'T! BELONG WITH MONSTERS!Jeremy: Then explain Gene Simmons.
- The final sin of the video?
Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation
- Jeremy's rant on an anachronism early on:German child: I'm totally freaking out!Jeremy: Not only is this German child speaking English but he's speaking modern English slang in 1897. I'm now pretty sure that young Friedrich Von Crocka Schmidt here can travel through time, except if he goes forward, he has to live as a old man and if he goes backwards, as a child. So no one believes him, thinking he's a child or a senile old man. My point is that this movie is so boring that I'm already thinking up of ideas for better movies and that's not a good sign!
- "What I love about these movies so much is their casual cannibalism."
- Jeremy finally points out that Mavis looks less like a 127 year old vampire and more like "a milennial who just used a gift card at The Lazy Raven that her cousin gave her last year."
- "I think the only specific instruction Adam Sandler was given on this movie was to use the most annoying range of voice possible."
- At the Gremlin flight attendants and their wild antics:Jeremy: Still not as batsh*t insane as Gremlins 2.
- This:Frankenstein's Monster: It's beautiful!Count Dracula: I thought you hated fire.Jeremy: Despite being such an asshole, Dracula would be excellent at Cinema Sins. Wait, what am I saying? BECAUSE of his asshole behaviour, Dracula would be excellent at Cinemasins!
- Jeremy later gets so pissed off at the movie, he takes back the compliment, claiming Dracula would still be terrible at Cinemasins.
- "Instead of trying to Jump The Shark, movie instead hypnotises it and rides around on its back for quite some time."
- Jeremy attempts to Rage Quit after 2 fart jokes in a row.
- At the singing Kraken:Jeremy: Discount Oogie-Boogie.
- This bit:Van Helsing: Welcome to the symphony of your doom!Jeremy: If you played Megadeth, you could have had a full orchestra of doom.
- When the Kraken attacks the ship:Jeremy: To be fair, this is my immediate and visceral reaction to dubstep too.
- This:Ericka: It is time to begin a new relationship.Count Dracula: Between monster and human.Jeremy: Aw, like Kanye and Kim.
- The final sin has Jeremy claiming that the franchise- hopefully- is over before accidentally blurting out how he'd like to see a spinoff based on the jazz-playing fish, virtually the only part of the movie he didn't hate. He then frantically tries to take back the comment.
- One of the outtakes:Van Helsing: I replaced all of my organs with technology!
- Jeremy can't help but point out Dracula's similarities to Gru."It's like Adam Sandler watched Steve Carrell in the first Despicable Me and said, "Hey, I can EASILY do a borderline-offensive Eastern European accent for a similarly unlikable and ghoulish character for three stupid movies too! GAME ON, STEVE!"
- When Peter is being chased by foxes:
- Jeremy: Are they the same size? How does this work? Is there air on this planet?! YOU DON'T KNOW!
- This bit:
- Rabbit: No, no, no, no!Peter: I think you said yes!
- "Animation within animation?! That's, like, 16 animations!"
- Jeremy expresses dismay at three Sony logos in a row at the beginning of the film.
- Fox: Streaking! Woooo!Jeremy: Wait, all these animals are naked. So haven't they all been streaking? Harold and Kumar would be proud right now.
- Jeremy points out that he hasn't heard so much chicken puns "since I went to that 15th anniversary screening of Rock-A-Doodle. In costume, of course. Wait...".
- Jeremy's rising anger at the movie, culminating in yet another epic rant at Chris for putting it on the schedule, just like with Pete's Dragon.
- This bit:Grouchy Smurf: We're all gonna die.
Jeremy: I wish you would. *ding*
- "Look, your five year old probably loved this movie. But f*ck your five year old." *ding*
- "Clumsy Smurf Rube Goldbergs himself into the toilet which, come to think of it, is the perfect metaphor for this movie."
- Jeremy's horror that the Smurfs have entered "our world."Jeremy: Oh my god, they're in our world. F*ck!! I should have known this was coming, but somehow I didn't. Goddammit.
- After Peter mocks Bonesaw's costume, asking if "[his] husband" made it for him:Jeremy: That's racist. *ding*
- "Cop reprimands citizen for not doing cop's job."
- When Peter flashes back to letting the robber go into the elevator... and it's clearly a different take of the scene:Jeremy: (plays the remembering scene against the actual scene) Peter remembers this wrong. *ding*
- "He stinks, and I don't like him." "Average everyday YouTube commentator."
- Jeremy refers to J. Jonah Jameson's newspaper office as a "ADHD Funhouse".
- As Jeremy points out, Sony forgot to remove the ING Lion logos from what is meant to be the Oscorp building.
- This:Harry: You should know I'm crazy about her. It's just, you know, you never made a move.
Jeremy: Bro code violation in all fifty states, fu*ker. *ding*
- When Green Goblins tries invoking the Superhero Paradox to get Peter to join him:
- How bad does Jeremy think "It's you who's out, Gobby. Out of your mind!" is? He sins it without stopping the scene or even saying a word.
- This:Aunt May: You're not Superman, you know.
Jeremy: DC Comics. *ding*
- After Mary Jane kisses Peter, and starts to make a connection between him and Spider-Man:Jeremy: Right, because you recognize the kiss, but not the voice. That completely makes sense. *ding*
- When Doc Ock wakes up in the hospital, screaming, "NO!!!!!!!!"Jeremy: We interrupt this Spider Man movie to bring you Revenge of the Sith. *ding*
- The last sin:Peter: ...whatever battle is raging inside us, we always have a choice. My friend Harry taught me that. He chose to be the best of himself.Jeremy: Only after finding out that you didn't kill his father. *ding*
- The first appearance of Stephen Collins (who in 2014 confessed to pedophilia) just has Jeremy remark "Well, this is awkward."
- "Victory fart."
- Jeremy's generally irreverent attitude towards Star Trek (he describes himself as a 'casual fan'), which acts as an amusing counterpoint to how seriously the films take themselves. Particularly, his surprise here that William Shatner's infamous tendency to randomly pause in sentences wasn't exaggerated.
- The Enterprise's overly long reveal is described by Jeremy in the same vein as a porno for you to masturbate to.
- Followed by much grumbling commentary re: the legendarily overlong shots designed solely to show off the special effects. Doesn't help that said effects, while top-of-the-line for the late 70's, are pretty embarrassingly crude today.
- Jeremy noticing the weirdness that was Bones repeatedly entering and exiting the bridge without any lines.
- Jeremy also not failing to note the weirdness that is the Ilia-bot's newly skimpy attire.Jeremy: Look, just as a practical matter, she left the ship in a Starfleet uniform, and she returned into a sonic shower in a... white mini-dress straight out of my pre-teen fantasies? One thing's for sure: this alien is a teenage boy.
Jeremy: Admit it, you just wanna see the sexy android naked.
- As Spock proposes 'a thorough examination of this probe':
Jeremy: I'm really glad this unfeeling alien entity, whatever it is, decided to keep Ilia's high heels on during the information-gathering process, for utmost sexiness.
- The Ilia-bot says she's completed her survey mission:
- One of the outtakes adds the sound of a Kool-Aid Man commercial, including the "Oh yeah!", to the scene where the V'Ger-controlled Ilia breaks through a wall.
- In another stinger, as per the running gag of Jeremy including audio of Galaxy Quest with the film clips, on the teleporter malfunction killing the cheap Vulcan replacement for Spock:Starfleet Crew Member: Enterprise, what we got back didn't live long. (As Teb) And it exploded.
''Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
- Kirk: KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
Jeremy: Khan. *ding*
''Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
- The repeatedly dashed hope Jeremy has that the Search for Spock ends quickly.
- Jeremy calls out Kirk for mocking the USS Excelsior on the grounds that it will save his ass three movies later.
- Jeremy gleefully points out how mind-melding just got sexier when Spock's father mind-melds with Kirk.
- Jeremy calls out the Vulcan temple acolytes for not being more impressed with having pulled off the fal-tor-pan (basically, the glorified mind meld that reunites Spock's mind with his body).
Star Trek (2009)
- This video was first to have the "eat/bite/hold an apple/carrot to make someone look like even more of an asshole".Jeremy: Did Kirk bring an apple to the simulator because he was hungry, or to make him look like an asshole?
- Jeremy's comment on how the Vulcans keep discriminating Spock because of his human mother:Jeremy: Seriously, are Vulcans like secret KKK members? Did the pointy ears take the place of pointy hats?
Star Trek Into Darkness
- On Harrison revealing his real name:Harrison: My name... is... Khan.Jeremy: Surprise! But only if you're four. *ding*
- One of the stingers/outtakes features the "My name is Khan" scene and puts Eminem's "My Name Is" song over it. It proved so hilarious and popular that they uploaded a 20-minute loop of the clip.
Star Trek Beyond
- The prequel trilogy is presented in two videos each. There were genuinely too many sins to fit just one.
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace
- Instead of the standard "In (Blank) Minutes," the title says "Yousa Gonna Watcha Lotsa Minutes!"
- "I got a bad feeling about this."
- Jar Jar instantly gets 100 sins.
- Later on in the video, he receives 100 more.
- Jeremy points out the Rewatch Bonus of noticing that the Queen Amidala we see captured is not Natalie Portman but Keira Knightley. But then Jeremy questions why you would be rewatching The Phantom Menace to notice such things. Which he counts as a sin.
- "Alien rat carcasses, here... get your alien rat-carcasses here!!"
- "Padme goes from maternal figure in this film to sexual partner in the next (*CLAP*), like that! And that is creepy as f*ck!"
- During Amidala and Palpatine's conversation, Jeremy suddenly falls asleep during the middle of a sin narration.
- When Jar Jar is told that he will be granted a military position:Jeremy: Well, he certainly is qualified!
- "Everything this scene is...and represents."
- "Also, in the span of six seconds, Jar Jar hits more targets than all the Stormtroopers in the entire Star Wars franchise combined... and ON ACCIDENT!"
- In one of the stingers:Queen Amidala: I will not condone a course of action that will lead us to war.Aragorn: Open war is upon you, whether you risk it or not.
- In another stinger, where they combine Viceroy Gunray's "Now there are two of them." line with endings of the trailers of Double Impact and Terminator 2: Judgment Day
Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
- This gem:Padmé: Ani, you'll always be that little boy I knew on Tatooine.Jeremy: So, let's have kids together. *ding*
- When Jango and Zam discuss their next attempt to kill Padme:Jango: We'll have to try something more subtle this time, Zam.Jeremy: WHY?!? *ding*
- At the clone training facility on Kamino:Lama Su: "We take great pride in our combat education and training programs."Jeremy: "But we don't spend much time on aiming practice."
- "WHO SENT YOU, PROBE?!"
- When Zamm Wessel briefly transforms into her alien form:Jeremy: WHAT?! *ding*
- On the Acklay and the other arena creatures:
- On the Nexu slashing at Padme, resulting in her sleeve tearing off, and baring her midriff:Jeremy: This creature basically didn't want to kill Amidala, just make her sexier. *ding*
Jeremy: OW, MY VAGINA!!! *ding*
- When Padme jumps off the pillar and onto the Reek being controlled by Anakin...
- When Mace decapitates Jango Fett:
- When Padme notices Yoda and the other troopers off-screen in the air about to save them from the battle droids:Amidala: Look!Jeremy: Eagles? *ding*
- Guess what audio is used for the total sin tally. (Sentence: De-limbed)
Star Wars: The Clone Wars
- Jeremy's subtitles for Anakin and Padme's conversation.Anakin: Senator, you have my undying gratitude.
Senator, I'm going to give you a tremendous porking when I get home.
Padme: No, Master Skywalker, it is I and the Republic who owes you thanks.
Sweet, I've been doing my Kegels.
- Jeremy's snark when Ahsoka complains about the rear deflector shields still being down.Jeremy: Despite a massive amount of fire, these assholes couldn't hit the ship if Anakin stopped in midair and built another ship on top of it. *ding*
Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
- The video title reads it as running for "it's almost over minutes".
- Jeremy gets increasingly frustrated by the amount of limbs getting cut off to the point of wondering if George Lucas had a fetish for such things.
- "What sort of nonsense is this?"Jeremy: George Lucas films his actors speaking in private.
- Jeremy sins love.
- "CGI is fun!! Wheeeeeee!"
- This:C-3PO: I feel so... helpless.
Jeremy: You mispronounced "pointless".
- "This movie does more to tear DOWN the lore of how powerful Jedi are than it does... ANYTHING else."
- This:Padme: So this is how liberty dies: with thunderous applause.
Jeremy: (chokes on something, then says...) Sorry... something really stupid stuck in my throat there... carry on.
- "Obi-Wan brings Padme to the lava planet for his kill of Anakin because... what could possibly go wrong?"
- Jeremy rags on Padme's infamous line, "Anakin, you're breaking my heart!""Why do we hate this line so much? Is it because the badass character Padme we see in Phantom Menace going around leading an assault on the viceroy has become a lump of melodramatic mush?"
- This:Anakin: If you're not with me, then you're my enemy!
Jeremy: Discount What Jesus Said.
- Jeremy criticizes the climactic battle between Obi-Wan and Anakin as "the let-downiest of all let-downs." One standout moment for him is the moment where a tower they are on falls in the lava:"How fortunate is it that this tower stays upright while floating down a river of lava it's being consumed— oh, f*ck it. My lack of interest should be BEYOND obvious right now. Just... tell me when it's over."
- "This is supposed to be epic, but it feels like a guy who just learned After Effects creating his own fan fiction and sharing it on YouTube, which was founded the very year this came out. COINCIDENCE!?"
- The fight goes on for so long that Jeremy falls asleep briefly.
- In reaction to Yoda confronting the Emperor:Emperor: At last the Jedi are no more.
Yoda: Not if anything to say about it I have!
Jeremy: Good job, movie, you made me want Frank Oz to shut up... somehow.
- Twice, Jeremy sins Obi-Wan's line: "It's over, Anakin! I have the high ground!" First..."Yep, movie about superhero Jedi freaks that can leap small buildings will now somehow be decided by a couple of feet above sea level, because... Sun Tzu!"
"So did Darth Maul, and you saw how that turned out."
- As Padme delivers her twins before expiring, she immediately names them Luke and Leia, which Jeremy thinks is simply unnatural: "It's like Lucas said, 'No one will know who these kids are! Better have Padme name them as soon as they pop out!'"
- In response to Anakin's, now Darth Vader's, infamously melodramatic Big "NO!" after he learns that he killed Padme..."Yes?... I mean... no."
- At the very end, Jeremy thinks there are still some loose ends that they never tied up before the original trilogy, which is set some 20 years after the prequel trilogy:"What about Luke's puberty? What about Leia's struggle with why her parents' castle has a ballroom but never has any balls?"
- In Part 1 of the video, Jeremy accuses Grievous of sounding like Serris, the main villain of Galaxy Quest. He then continues this gag in the last stinger in the Part 2 video, where he takes Grievous's line about being trained in the lightsaber combat by Count Dooku and replaces it with this line:"DELIVER THE DEVICE TO ME, or I will destroy your ship!"
- Right off the bat, we get this:
- This:Jeremy: In-story Stormtrooper toys are both way larger and cooler than any toys I had as a kid in the 80's.
- Upon seeing CGI Tarkin:Jeremy: AHHHHHHH! TERRIFYING CGI DECISIONS!
- "Callback to A New Hope is callback."
- This:Darth Vader: Be careful not to...choke on your aspirations, Director.Jeremy: Little known fact, Darth Vader spent some time as James Bond from 1960-1962.
- When a Stormtrooper sees a Rebel ship, Jeremy gives the character an interesting backstory...
- "Well, well, well. Hoisted by his own Death Star."
- Upon seeing CGI Leia:Jeremy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! CGI DECISIONS EVEN MORE TERRIFYING THAN THE LAST ONE!!
- Jeremy's reaction to the final line of the movie.Leia: Hope.Jeremy: AHHHHHHHHH, F*CK YOU, MOVIE! Did you know the original movie's called A New Hope?! Hope hope hope hope hope hope hope hope hope hope hope hope! Bob Hope! Hope Solo!
- A true Black Comedy example: The last stinger is of Bail Organa telling Mon Mothma that he can trust his emmisary (Leia) with his life. Cut to Alderaan being blown to space dust by the Death Star.
Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope
- "Damn, I forgot what all that s*it just said."
- Kevin Smith doing his signature 'stoner over-analyzing pop-culture' bit is good for several chuckles, particularly the non-sequitur Running Gag theory that this is fundamentally a movie about 'a bunch of people's first day on the job.'
- At the shot-up sandcrawler:
- "Eww... You got some obvious Phantom Menace in my New Hope!"
- "I'm surprised this radio didn't shoot Han first."
- After two "That's racist" sins, we get to the cantina scene and thus...Jeremy: (Circle put around the bass player) That's bassist. *ding*
Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back
- At Han's Carbonite-frozen face:Jeremy: Walt Disney. *ding*
- After Luke and Leia kiss:Chewbacca: (unintelligible Shyriiwook)
Jeremy: Translation: This is some f*cked-up s*it right here. *ding*
- "A-HA! Proof that Cloud City is funded by Gringotts!" (adds an arrow to point out the goblin-like Ugnaughts walking around)
- You'd think that Jeremy would take a sin off for the now famous twist of Darth Vader being Luke's father being a great shocker at the time, but he simply and bluntly laments that the explanation would be complete bullsh*t.
- One of the stingers puts the "Tommy how's the peeping" audio over R2D2 peeking into Yoda's hut.
- The movie's Sentence is "Appears on Maury", including Maury himself saying "You ARE the father!"
- When Chewbacca is fixing the robot C-3PO, C-3PO says, "Oh, yes, that's very good. I like that," and Jeremy sins it for being "reconstructive porn dialogue."
Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi
- "In shoot first minutes"
- "Spiral-wrapped penis head has a point."
- Slave Leia gets five sins off without comment.
- "Leia's my sister?"Jeremy: 1983 audiences then went, "Oh my God! What an amazing surprise! This series just keeps...oh, my God, they kissed SEVERAL TIMES in this series didn't they?" *ding*
- "Leia has memories of Natalie Portman."
- When Leia confesses that she somehow always knew that she and Luke were related, Jeremy plays the scene where she kisses Luke, asking if she knew during that time as well.
- Near the end, Leia tells Han that Luke is her brother. Han looks confused, and Jeremy thinks he also remembers the kissing scene.
- Star Wars: General Hospital.
- Jeremy's rising anger at the Ewok battle.Jeremy: Ha ha ha. So cute. F*ck you. *ding*
Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens
- When Rey goes to sell her scrap on Jakku, and is told that it is worth "one quarter portion," Jeremy chimes in with this:Jeremy: GameStop. *ding*
- "Rey apparently works for the Ferguson Police Department."
- Jeremy refers to General Hux as "Redheaded Hitler."
- Star Wars: General Hospital.
Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi
- This:General Hux: We will destroy the rebel fleet and terminate them all.Jeremy: I can't believe the editors forgot to put on his twirling moustache!
- During the opening battle, Jeremy points out why one cannon shouldn't manner to the Rebel Alliance as "these guys never hit anything anyway with ''all'' the cannons."
- Jeremy comments on Poe's facial expressions by singing lines from "Rebel Rebel".
- When the Porgs first appear:Jeremy: Discount Ewoks.
- Jeremy's comments on the infamous "milking scene", if only for how understated it is:Jeremy: That thing's got boob-balls.
- This bit:Rey: I come with hope.Jeremy: But only Hope? They didn't give you Empire or Jedi?
- Jeremy snaps at the repeated mention of fueling ships throughout the movie, going so far as to say that all the talk about fuel made him give up on the franchise.
- This bit:Rey: I was cleaning my blaster when it went off.Jeremy: This was my excuse whenever my ex-girlfriend caught me masturbating.
- During the casino escape sequence:Finn: Stop enjoying this!Jeremy: Oh, believe me, Finn. I'm not enjoying this.
- Jeremy plays audio from the "you can't handle the truth" scene from A Few Good Men over Rey's backstory.
- Jeremy mentions he's still upset about the repeated use of the word "hope" from his Rogue One review.
- During a giant explosion near the end:Jeremy: F*cking Michael Bay.
- This part.(Michelangelo swings his nunchuks around to intimidate a foot clan ninja)
(Ninja starts swinging his nunchuks around)
Jeremy: Nunchuk rap battle. *ding*
- "Also, EVERYONE WAITS DURING THIS BULLS*IT INSTEAD OF FIGHTING!!"
- This moment:Answering Machine: Hi, this is April...
Jeremy: No it's not, bitch! The electricity was severed... REMEMBER? *ding*
- At one point of the video, he deducts a sin for Sam Rockwell being cast in the movie before being known for his roles in other movies, like Galaxy Quest. In one of the stingers, we get this:Splinter (as Jason): You're not gonna die on the planet, Guy!
Sam Rockwell's TMNT character (as Guy Fleegman): I'm not?! What's my last name?
Splinter (as Jason): It's, um, um- I don't know.
Sam Rockwell's TMNT character (as Guy Fleegman): Nobody knows! Do you know why?! Because my character isn't important enough for a last name, because I'm gonna die five minutes in!
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Secret of the Ooze
- The sentence: Michael Bay, complete with Raphael yelling "NO!!!!!!"
- On April's yellow skintight ninja getup.April: I got it on my last trip to Japan. You like it?Jeremy: Yes I do. Oh wait, she was talking to Casey wasn't she? *ding*
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)
- Everything wrong with TMNT 2014 in F*ck Michael Bay Minutes...Sacks: Let's take a bite out of the Big Apple!
Jeremy: At some point the director said "let's have him take a bite out of the Big Apple. It'll make him look like even more of an asshole." *ding*''
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows
- Jeremy says the Turtles haphazardly throwing around a pizza box in the opening scene would only result in what he calls "lasagna-pizza, which is when after jostling, the contents of a pizza box resemble lasagna as much as it does pizza."
Terminator 2: Judgement Day
- Jeremy calls out the T-1000 trying to force Sarah Connor to "Call to John" when he could easily kill her, then imitate her voice.T-1000: Call to John now.
Jeremy: Is this guy programed to be a torture bot? One of the tricks he showed he can do earlier in the film is perfectly imitate someone's voice. He does not need Sarah to call to John. He could kill Sarah and do it himself. He even does her voice here in a minute!! Buuuut we're buying time for Arnold to save the day, so... *ding*
- Jeremy keeps pointing out the Pepsi product placements.
- "Because of a machine, a Terminator can learn the value of human life. Maybe we can, too."Jeremy: Nope! *ding*
Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines
- When the T-X is sawing through the roof of the car that Kate, John and the Terminator are in:Jeremy: SHOOT THE THING! WITH THE THING! *ding*
- Jeremy's reaction to John Connor's comment towards his future wife.John Connor: You remind me of my mother...
Jeremy: So let's get married! *ding*
- The image they use for the final sin tally and sentence is of John getting impaled.
- "Jai Courtney." *ding*
- "Movie stupidly thinks the only reason audiences haven't taken to Jai Courtney yet is because they haven't seen him naked enough."
- When Sarah shouts "Come with me if you want to live", Jeremy proceeds to list a bunch famous lines from other movies.
- "Were it not for Game of Thrones I would be forced to conclude this girl's acting is generally terrible."
- Jeremy removes a sin for J. K. Simmons' "Goddamn time-travelling robots" line, despite Jeremy's hatred for the film.
- "I guess this kind of nudity is supposed to arouse my shadow puppets."
- During the brief mugshot montage with the main characters, Jeremy laments that Jai Courtney and Emilia Clarke got two additional inches from their real-life heights and that Arnold got four additional inches.
- "I'm not machine. I'm not man."Jeremy: I'm Machiniman.
- "YOU get a time machine! And YOU get a time machine! And YOU ge-"
- Young Kyle: He kind of looks like...you, Dad.Jeremy: He does not. *ding*
- The first sin of the video:Jeremy: All those in favor of never starting another movie with an opening eye, say 'aye'...er, 'not-eye'.
- At one point, Jeremy expresses shock at Lara having the upper body strength for stunts, noting that "I've seen breadsticks bigger than her forearms."
- "Tomb Raider inspired so many "Planetary Alignment" drinking games that DUI arrests tripled in the summer of 2001."
- Jeremy goes out of his way to sin 'every' instance of poor editing.
- During a particularly incomprehensible action sequence:Jeremy: There's so much... whatever... going on here that I'm adding 20 sins.
- This moment:Jeremy: You know, if Christopher Walken was in this movie, I'd remove at least 5 sins.
- The final sin:Credit: Directed By Simon West
Lara Croft: Tomb Raider - The Cradle Of Life
- This:Treasure Hunter: When he dives, we dive! We've got to find out what's underneath there.Jeremy: So, treasure hunters are the equivalent of people driving around mall parking lots, just waiting for someone to pull out to steal their spot.
- This moment:Lara: This'll be the biggest find since the lost pyramids!
- "Thankfully, the screenwriters kept all of the witty banter from the first movie intact."
- "Movie mispells Kazakhstan! What kind of cheep production leaves typos in a finla product?!"
- This moment:Reiss: Haven't you ever looked around and thought that maybe some people shouldn't be here?
- "Apparently, a bunch of creatures from the Resident Evil set got bored and decided to visit the Tomb Raider set."
- This moment:Lara: They seem to react to movement.Jeremy: Hmmm, where have I heard THAT before? (while the Jurassic Park theme plays in the background)
- Kid in café: Wow! This is the coolest thing I've ever seen! Explosions everywhere! This is easily a hundred times cooler than Armageddon... I swear to God!
Jeremy: Whoa, whoa,... the director of Transformers just b*tch-slapped the guy who directed Armageddon. *ding*
Revenge of the Fallen
Dark of the Moon
- The narrator's thoughts on the more critically lauded supporting actors plants a mind-warping what-if idea for a movie in our heads:
Age of Extinction
- The opening titles don't even bother acting professional. "Everything wrong with Transformers: Age of Extinction in a fraction of the length of this f*cking dog-sh*t movie"
- The narrator mocking Tessa and her inability to obtain a scholarship.
- From the overdubs:Scorpions: Rock you like a hurricane!
- Also,Optimus Prime: But whenever you look to the stars, think of one of them as my soul."Fievel: "Somewhere out there..."
- The narrator's response to a theater owner complaining about remakes:Theater Owner: The movies nowadays, that's the trouble. Sequels of remakes, bunch of crap.
Jeremy: F***CK YOUUUUUUUUU! You don't get to make this joke after building an entire career out of the sh*t this theater owner is bemoaning. That's like having your cake, eating it, and then saying "F*ck cake! I'm above it!" *ding*
- This bit,
- "Movie rips off the screenplay I wrote when I was seven."
- This part as well:Megatron: Prepare for interstellar launch.
- "Caesar Flickerman just asked Frasier Crane for semen. I am officially giving up my fanfiction career."
- The Take That! against Nicola Peltz. Jeremy is quick to identify her as the girl from The Last Airbender and says not only did her acting did not improve, it got worse.
The Last Knight
- Right at the beginning, we get this:Merlin: It's awful!Jeremy: I know, have you SEEN the editing and camera angles of this movie?!
- "Yep, that's what people in America do. They go on Chinese websites to look at Lamborghinis."
- "Transformers 5: Attack of the Drones!"
- After Mark Wahlberg's character grabs on a drone after falling off a building:Jeremy: Oh, f*ck off.
- At one point, the action is so stupid, Jeremy doesn't even finish his sin:Jeremy: Movie expects us to believe...Huh.
- The Michael Bay credit at the end of the film gets 1000 sins. Just after the Sin Counter nearly breaks again, but Jeremy is saved by the backup they bought.Jeremy: F*ck! Not again! Oh yeah, we bought a backup this time. Phew.
- "See Spider-Man? Even Bella F*cking Swan uses Google over Bing."
- "These traits describe Lebron James, not vampires."
- "Bella searches for 'Cold One' and doesn't get a million Budweiser ads."
- As Bella and Edward head off to the woods for the infamous reveal scene: "You know everyone thinks you're going off to pork, right?"
- In reference to one of Edward's, er, intense stares at Bella.Jeremy: I tried looking at a girl like this once, but all I got was a restraining order. *ding*
- The bonus round at the end of the video makes count of the various noises Bella makes over the film, ranging from breaths, gasps, mutterings, and awkward laughs.
- "Hey, they got a new actor to play Jacob who isn't shirtless all the time!", followed up about a third of the video later, the second Jacob takes off his shirt: "Hey, Taylor Lautner's back! Where was he the whole movie?"
- His final sin: "Not one pie was f*cked in this movie."
- The post-sentence sequence that just replays the scene of Bella and Jacob talking about "the Rabbit"(a car he's refurbishing)with a caption pointing out that apparently no one working on this movie was aware a rabbit is also a type of vibrator.
- Bella: Oh my God. Dad? I'm a virgin.
Jeremy: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
- Jeremy generally losing patience with the franchise.Jacob: Bella.....this is what we do.
Jeremy: After a pause that long, I would've taken fifty sins off if he'd just said "Bella.....shut the fuck up." *ding*
Breaking Dawn Part 1
- "This f*cking guy."
- "Also, Edward's Vampy Sense is TINGLING! His skin is TWINKLING! And I think I'm going to head to the bathroom for a little TINKLING!"
- "Anna Kendrick is all of the following things here in this scene: hot, correct, inappropriate, judgemental, selfish, and hot."
- "It's weird to be back on two legs again... and in clothes."Jeremy: This is exactly what my college girlfriend said to me after a particularly—
- "I guess the metaphor here is that Bella is Jesus, sacrificing her virginity for the sake of... wait..."
- Jeremy saying what all of us have probably thought at some point:Jeremy: These movies get more and more annoying as they go along, but damn if I don't still really covet that house. Jesus, it's fucking rad!
- As wildly squicky as the implications of the imprinting subplot are, Jeremy's responses are absolute gold.Jeremy: Also, Jacob imprints on a fucking baby. He just fell in love with a baby. I just want everyone to know that Jacob fell in love with a baby. I don't care if it means they'll "just be friends", or "he'll be her protector", or whatever the fuck they want to do to justify this shit, he just fell in love with a baby.
- The stingers where the guests are booing Bella as she gets married and leaves for her honeymoon.
Breaking Dawn Part 2
- Jeremy delivering the first sin in such an "I'm so done with these movies" tone.
- "Also, good thing this baby is super-flammable what the f*** did I just say."
- When Edward makes the wolves go away by reminding them of their imprinting laws:Jeremy: [muttering in mock anger] Stupid imprinting... stupid Jacob... Someone should write a law about imprinting on vampire children. Too late now... stupid imprinting... *ding*
- On Aro's weird laugh/squee upon seing Renesmee:Jeremy: Aro has a stroke, but because he's a vampire, the only symptom is what a cat sounds like when it experiments with anal. *ding*
- When a vampire is angry after learning the Cullens were "consorting with the werewolves, our natural enemies!" Jeremy finds it very amusing.Jeremy: That's been all five movies, though, right?! This guy wants to fight so bad he's grasping at straws. [mockingly] "But...they sparkle!" *ding*
- When Rogue (Anna Paquin) says "I saved your life" in a Southern twang.The producers of True Blood later saw this and said "Yes, this is exactly the fake Southern accent we want." *ding*
X2: X-Men United
- When the movie opens in Washington, DC the narrator says "DC Comics", followed by a buzzer and no sins.
X-Men: The Last Stand
- "Jeez does anyone in this series ever stay dead? Well... Cyclops does. Because, f*ck Cyclops."
X-Men Origins: Wolverine
- His comment on whether Wade actually kills the guards:Wade: Okay! People are dead!
Jeremy: (shows arrows pointing to Wade's swords that have no blood on them) Really? Were they bloodless people? *ding*
X-Men: First Class
- He takes off a sin for the Wolverine cameo.
- When Magneto wrecks the room in the prison camp after his mom is killed, and while doing so, yells, "NEIN!!!!"note :Jeremy: German Revenge of the Sith.
- When Yashida is revealed to be the Silver Samurai:Yashida: Don't look so shocked.Jeremy: I am not shocked.
- When Wolverine uses a Pre-Mortem One-Liner on Yashida before he pushes him down a chasm:Logan: You asked me to come and say goodbye. Sayonara.Jeremy: That's racist. *ding*
X-Men: Days of Future Past
- One of the outtakes:Magneto: Who the f*** are you?
Apocalypse: Too kind, too kind, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Ivan Ooze.
- When a bride flashes Logan:Jeremy: At the film's first script meeting, a producer asked "We have an R-Rating, so... what should we do?" Immediately, Tad jumped up, and wrote "BEWBS" on the whiteboard, and everyone laughed. And then the laughing got violent and out of control, and everyone started high-fiving everyone else in the face, and everyone got bludgeoned to death. Later, the Jimmy Johns guy arrived and noticed the dead bodies and the whiteboard... and finished writing this scene and the rest of the screenplay and STILL delivered all his sandwiches on time. *ding*
- After Logan discovers Gabriella's body, Jeremy wonders how Pierce must have found her. He then imagines that Pierce called up motel managers until he found one that answered thusly:Manager!Jeremy: Yes! I know who you're talking about. The little girl is always f*king s*it up in the parking lot. Murder them promptly, please. *ding*