Things You are No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG:

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Definitely not a weirdo
[up][up][up]Yup, anvils can be useful. Two daggers, some rope, and an anvil can turn what was supposed to be a challenging fight that drained our resources into a Mook Horror Show.
An in-universe one, this time. From a game of Warhammer 40,000 Black Crusade:

Never allowed to command on a warp vessel again. When the warp sends you to the war-torn sector days early, ahead of the fleet, so you have to make an emergency jump back OUT to avoid being shot down, a demon invades, stops the engine, the captain commits suicide, the navigator's head nearly explodes twice, the ship crashes into a warp reef, gets sent across the sector, dilutes time to make it seem like it's taking months, but still, after all that, delivers you to the destination exactly on time with the rest of the fleet you left with, so no one believes you, maybe the universe is trying to tell you something.
1003 Enlong24th May 2012 10:30:58 PM from The Underground Facility , Relationship Status: is commanded toŚ WANK!
Court Dragon
I wish I could impose rules on other party members. Because my current campaign has a party member that needs to be told she is no longer allowed to drug other party members during dungeon crawls.

No matter how badly we need to be able to use that mirror, or open those bags.

edited 24th May '12 11:15:15 PM by Enlong

I have a message from another time...
1004 KyleJacobs24th May 2012 10:53:10 PM from Connecticut/D.C. , Relationship Status: And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson
I desire context.
1005 Enlong24th May 2012 11:14:54 PM from The Underground Facility , Relationship Status: is commanded toŚ WANK!
Court Dragon
Right, so, we had followed this threatening letter to a mysterious house in a slum district, yeah? (In-chracter, I had made the argument that whoever it was knew where we lived, so it was better to face his jab than wait for a knife while we slept)

It quickly turned into one of those freaky "ahaha, you have no idea what's real" dungeons. Anyway, in one room was a plate of food and several cups. One of our guys went to it first, while the other person and I held back. We decided not to do anything with that after he started seeing stuff. We went back to the foyer, and a copy of the guy who ate the food stepped out of the mirror, and briefly fought us before fading. (I may have embellished ab it with the quick quip). So, we get to another room, and there's a suspicious pitcher of red liquid on a desk. The other sober member of the party demands that the other guy be the one to drink it, because he's already started taking the drugs in this mansion. So of course, he starts seeing stuff again and finding illusionary(?) pitchers of the stuff that keeps him hooked throughout the dungeon crawl.

So, after some shenanigans end with us blindfolding the drugged guy so he can't see any more of the stuff, we come across these weird bags. Of course, the blindfolded guy tears one open because he can't see the warning, and I get shot full of some sort of demonic darkness stuff. It was a heck of a day.

So, the only remaining sober member of our party insists that we keep opening them. I mean, it turns out that was the only way forward, since we opened the first one, but she was rather insistent on drugging the rest of us once all the shenanigans started.

I think her character was disgruntled that we didn't give her any time to come up with an excuse to go off and talk to her secret spy informant before we went off to investigate the place.

And this wasn't the last time we would end up having to make one guy the designated druggie, either.

edited 24th May '12 11:18:10 PM by Enlong

I have a message from another time...
1006 doorhandle31st May 2012 02:06:54 AM from Space Australia!
Aquire poison immumity. As soon as conveinient. grin
1007 Krautman3rd Jun 2012 02:50:07 PM from Hiding from the man, man
WHAT HAS SCIENCE WROUGHT
I am never allowed to play a Chaos Monk again. The combination of poison immunity and disease immunity is far too dangerous in my hands.
...and that's terrible.
1008 Exelixi3rd Jun 2012 03:41:29 PM from Alchemist's workshop , Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
Lesbarian
Never again am I allowed to play an alcohol-fueled Dwarf wrestler.
Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-
1009 BlueNinja04th Jun 2012 01:07:39 AM from Hiding in the corner , Relationship Status: I made a point to burn all of the photographs
Sailing the big blue sea
When told to "go help the border outpost against drow raids" this does not mean to start by stabbing the drow party member before we leave headquarters.

Upon seeing a temple of Helm converted over to worship Lloth, it is considered bad form to turn to the cleric of Helm and say, "I don't see a difference."

Not allowed to let the pyromaniac set fire to a grain silo as a distraction.

This includes offering to set the fire in their place.
Tropers are amongst the most civil, intelligent and toughtful people I've had the pleasure of talking to online. - Gutstheberserker
1010 imojee6th Jun 2012 09:09:37 PM from The Desert , Relationship Status: In bed with a green-skinned space babe
Be evil
My entire party is now banned from using diarrhea inducing poison on every enemy possible.

It proved to be far too much of a game breaker.
Through the eyes I have known you.
1011 MasterInferno6th Jun 2012 09:21:06 PM from Ideal City , Relationship Status: With my statistically significant other
All Pop, No Culture
Evil necromancer character not allowed to reenact Cannibal Corpse album covers with allies or enemies.
You mean you took this post seriously?
1012 32_Footsteps7th Jun 2012 10:58:10 AM from Just north of Arkham , Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
Think of the mooks!
I'm never allowed to play a character that speaks French.
Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.
1013 Artemis927th Jun 2012 12:16:48 PM from contemplation
Cogito Gratia Cogitan
[up] Any particular reason?
Ponders too much; thinks too little. Currently goes by Knowlessman.
1014 32_Footsteps7th Jun 2012 12:46:12 PM from Just north of Arkham , Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
Think of the mooks!
Because I studied French for eight years, and I can do a reasonable approximation of a Parisian accent (it's good enough that native French speakers can't tell I'm American, but not good enough for them to be fooled into thinking I'm from Paris). And I will prove how good I am at it if given the opportunity.

The problem, of course, is that I'm the only French speaker in my group, and I can do the accent thick enough that the other players can't always tell what I'm trying to say in English. (Note that this also becomes an excuse to do the French knights routine from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, which also goes against the "don't derail the session with too many Monty Python quotes" rule that my group has.)

This rule was made in my group back in 1998, when it was discovered my Quebecois Bone Gnawer resulted in my character being hated well beyond what you'd expect, even given that he was a) a Quebecois in a game that took place in the United States, and b) the Omega Wolf in Werewolf: The Apocalypse.

edited 7th Jun '12 12:46:43 PM by 32_Footsteps

Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.
1015 Muramasan137th Jun 2012 09:39:05 PM , Relationship Status: Not war
Not allowed to give everyone Latin mottoes.

Even if Da Mihi Res totally fits the rogue.

[down] "Gimme it" would be a more natural translation, but yes.

edited 7th Jun '12 11:16:46 PM by Muramasan13

Smile for me!
1016 MasterInferno7th Jun 2012 09:52:22 PM from Ideal City , Relationship Status: With my statistically significant other
All Pop, No Culture
[up]"Give the thing to me"?

[down]I think you mean "meum"...

edited 9th Jun '12 5:03:10 PM by MasterInferno

You mean you took this post seriously?
1017 Azreal3419th Jun 2012 04:56:51 PM from Wandering , Relationship Status: watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
Munchkin in training
[up][up]Tuum Est Meum, my friend, Tuum Est Meum.

"What's yours is mine."

edited 11th Jun '12 7:11:59 PM by Azreal341

Right at that moment, somewhere off in whatever non-space the denizens of canceled game lines live, a Technocrat fist-bumped an Etherite.
1018 Michael11th Jun 2012 04:18:24 PM , Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
So that's what this does
Ah, yes, French. Had a wonderful scene go wrong because of that. GM was very proud of his French skills and dropped it into conversations all the time, so I, playing a Frenchman, rehearsed a scene in French beforehand and he turned out unwilling to rp it in French. Unfortunately translating directly into English lost some details and I had to go back over it later and clarify that one vital tu was a vous.

Also, on the subject of pyromania, I am strongly discouraged from burning down a house to see if anyone's hiding in it. We didn't have time for a proper search.
Balance - the original sixth sense.
1019 Muramasan1311th Jun 2012 05:02:51 PM , Relationship Status: Not war
In other news, GURPS: Flesh to Stone -> Earth to Air -> Gust of Wind.

Especially not on the Big Bad's corpse, "just to make sure".
Smile for me!
1020 Exelixi12th Jun 2012 07:59:37 AM from Alchemist's workshop , Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
Lesbarian
These are for my party's necromancer (in my RL game, not the one online):

Not allowed to keep a hostile, malevolent animated skull as a pet.

Threatening to kill someone and summon their spirit to watch you rape their corpse is okay. Following through with it is not.
Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-
1021 MasterInferno12th Jun 2012 09:18:15 AM from Ideal City , Relationship Status: With my statistically significant other
All Pop, No Culture
There is no spell whose material components include 38 trained gophers.
You mean you took this post seriously?
1022 32_Footsteps12th Jun 2012 11:38:04 AM from Just north of Arkham , Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
Think of the mooks!
[up]Was this a very clever use of Polymorph spells? Because if I had 38 trained gophers, I'd have real fun combining them with a couple polymorph spells to bring a new meaning to the phrase "death from below."
Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.
1023 Muramasan1312th Jun 2012 04:32:49 PM , Relationship Status: Not war
Or enlarge them and use their tunnels to structurally destabilize a castle.
Smile for me!
1024 MasterInferno12th Jun 2012 08:53:56 PM from Ideal City , Relationship Status: With my statistically significant other
All Pop, No Culture
[up][up]No, I was just throwing the idea around.
You mean you took this post seriously?
1025 KyleJacobs12th Jun 2012 09:57:54 PM from Connecticut/D.C. , Relationship Status: And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson
My Heavy Metal Bard does not know the spell "Summon Groupies."

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