It's okay to take bribes from enemy monsters not to tell where they are, but duly appointed (albeit brainwashed) guardians of the royal family must be killed for standing in your way!
A king should immediately cease contacts with an allied race because his ten year old daughter thinks their leader looks evil. It's also completely unreasonable for him not to believe her, when she says that some vague dream about clouds is a prophecy about how evil that allied leader is. However, another ten-year-old claiming to have come back from a future in which said leader took over the country will immediately convince him.
Adults can’t pick up sticks or use slingshots, that’s just too childish. Go find a bow and shoot an arrow through a lit torch at your target with expert precision while standing on a rotating platform rather than just walk over to your target with a burning stick, you wimp.
Do you want to be treated like an adult? Carry a lethal weapon at all times. If you wear a cow mask as well, you'll be considered even more mature.
Impersonating people's loved ones is a perfectly acceptable way to help solve their immediate problems. You also shouldn't worry about the effect your sudden absence will have on them once you return to your own country, even if they thought you were their boyfriend or the leader of the tribe.
Even if you change shape right in front of people, no one will ever realize you're the same person.
If you encounter a dying person, you should remove their face and wear it in order to impersonate them.
When it comes to side quests, even if you know that your actions will have no lasting benefits for other people it's still ok to do them for the lasting benefits to yourself.
Being turned into a child won't upset your fiance, all that matters is that you have your wedding band.
People should respect your honorable qualities and fear your darker qualities. But they should never learn that you have both, and certainly shouldn't believe that your darker aspects are being harnessed for the greater good.
Age of Calamity Corollary: Every beloved item that you confiscate from her will save your life later as a result. Keep up the good work!
Shady voices who promise you amazing services in return for large sums of money upfront are to be trusted. However, friendly travelling merchants may actually be trying to kill you.
Anyone whose name you don't know is probably going to try to kill you.
Before digging up a robot army, make sure you know what a password manager is.
Every song in existence was written specifically to help you become stronger. And only you.
