Are your villains too mundane and easily defeated? Does your show need a strange being from the cosmos whose purposes and intents are beyond the capacity of us mere mortals to understand? Do you want a lovecraftian horror god whose very presence introduces the grim tone of the setting or indicates that the character's lives are about to take a steep dive? Well gaze at the stars no further for they are right for Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™!
Dot your Iä Iä's and cross your fhtaghs because your dark masters at Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ deserve nothing less than the best! Perfect for when you're bored and need a little existential crisis in your life to spice things up! Your heroes won't know what hit them when Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ drops out of the sky and remakes reality into its weird image!
Who need dragons when you can have the very gods they fear? We got those!What about monsterous versions of heavenly messengers who are completely justified in saying, 'Fear not'? Ask and thou shall receive!Do you think zombies aren't scary enough? We've hit you covered!Do you feel that Fido needs a profane upgrade? Mind the extra paws!Do you want to Mind Rape Mother Nature and have her beg for the sweet release of death as gardeners everywhere go mad? Be sure to trim the skull-shaped leaves periodically!Want your A.I. to have a God Complex and the algorithms worthy of an Elder God made for robots? Be sure to hide your tech (or not)!Don't you just hate the hassle and stress of the holiday season? Try our new and improved Saint Nick, Fhtagn Edition! He is guaranteed to bring about an abrupt end to all of the festivities!How about a cute and cuddly being from the void between the start that won't definitely shatter a random star system each time it giggles! How about a Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ that looks and talks like you yet is still intrinsically different enough for your family to tell you both apart! With a friend like that, who needs sanity, right?! What about a computer virus written in an eldritch code, who can sing you a mind-bending hymn written in binary? Download the death bringer of all of realityonto your hapless hard drive! Why rip a tear in reality to get a gibbering horror when you can manipulate good old-fashioned deoxyribonucleic acid to build your own god in your lab? Make sure to keep it under control!Trope Co.® has all kinds of eldritch abominations for your occult-inspired needs and can even turn mundane characters into hungry gods in later adaptations!
The best thing about Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ is that you're not limited to just adding it to your story! You can go out to eat with it! You can impress it with your badassery! You can even decide to date outside your physiology and start a relationship that'll endure long after the last star has faded, unleashing the best of both realities upon an unsuspecting universe!
Even if you and your Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ aren't on friendly terms, you can still do much more! You can trick it, intimidate it, take control of it, even going as far as mocking it before you attack it!* The possibilities are endless!
*WARNING: Under no circumstances must you attempt to mock your Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ even if it doesn't notice the insult at first since it tends to react poorly to being disrespected by a puny mortal. Incapacitating your Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ is even more inadvisable as such products trend to have unforeseen failsafes should they ever suffer defeat.
Order Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ for the whole cult now! You don't have to wait until the end of all existence to get your very own harbinger of terror and insanity! Our licensed professionals are standing by for your sacrifices so call right now!
Disclaimer: Trope Co.® will not be held responsible for extreme psychiatric collapse upon bearing witness to profane truths, rearrangement of physical and metaphysical laws in the vicinity of Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™, unpleasant or fatal responses to stimuli presented by Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™, confusion and debates resulting from various perspectives on Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™'s true form, varied levels of destruction of reality or realities, dismal existence brought on by Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™, any unforeseen desire to destroy all of reality by said product, eternal suffering, plagues arising from either the product itself or the substantial amount of corpses of those sacrificed to purchase said product, mass hallucinations, worship of Trope Co.® Eldritch Abomination ™ replacing all indigenous religions, billions of souls being eaten, biological reconstitution, death of all logic and reason, and baldness.
