Hey Kids! Your parents aren't letting you get a dog or cat? Don't fret, buy a Trope Co.® Adorable Abomination™!
Trope Co.®'s Adorable Abominations™ are far superior to an ordinary, boring cat or dog due to their non-euclidian physiology. You can take them anywhere - whether it is the comfort of your own home, to the frigid tundras of Glorious Mother Russia, to the hostile atmosphere of Betelgeuse - the Trope Co.® Adorable Abomination™ will never perish. In fact, it is likely to outlive you and everyone you love. Isn't that cute?
Impress your friends, win first place at show-and-tell, inflict ambiguous disorders, both benign and suicide-inducing onto the schoolyard bullies.
WARNING FOR PARENTS: Please monitor all Trope Co.® Adorable Abomination™ activity. If Trope Co.® Adorable Abomination™ leads to the injury, death and unholy reanimation of one's relatives, please call customer services and we will exterminate and replace all damaged property. Trope Co.® is not responsible for any Reality-Breaking Paradoxes or space-time anomalies caused by the mishandling of Trope Co.® Adorable Abomination™.