Recap / Family Guy S 5 E 11 The Tan Aquatic With Steve Zissou

Original air date: February 18, 2007

Stewie gets into tanning after Peter accidentally leaves him in the sun without sunscreen, but the excessive UV exposure leaves him with peeled skin and a mole that may be cancerous. Meanwhile, Chris is being bullied by a kid who is taking over as the neighborhood paper boy and things get worse when Peter beats up Chris' bully and makes everyone else his target.

This episode contains examples of:

  • Accidental Innuendo: Invoked when Peter confronts his old bully Randy:
    Peter: I'm here to kick your ass, Fulcher. I'm gonna beat ya, and then my son Chris is gonna beat ya. It's gonna be an old-fashioned father-son beat-off.
  • Bloody Hilarious: One cut-away gag shows Peter inventing an electric shaver by attaching razor blades to a fan. We're thankfully spared the result, but we do see the blood splattering on the bathroom window.
  • Bowdlerization: The following scene cuts/alterations were made between the FOX/free-TV syndicated version and the [adult swim]/cable syndication/DVD version:
    • Quagmire cursing on the golf course: The words "Goddamn" and "shit" were bleeped out on all of the TV versions (and the censored audio of the DVD), but not on DVD (uncensored audio).
    • The scene of Stewie checking himself out in the mirror after Lois points out that he's tanned was longer on the [adult swim] and DVD version. Brian comes in and compliments Stewie on his tan. Stewie then adds that he's hotter than the Wisconsin nymphomaniac who lived in the attic, followed by a cutaway of Stewie in bed awake while the Wisconsin nymphomaniac has an Immodest Orgasm offscreen.
    • Brian squirting Stewie with lotion: Surprisingly, the scene was allowed to stay on the FOX cut, but Brian's line "It's not what it looks like" was cut when Mr. Furley catches Brian (according to the DVD commentary, that line made the male ejaculation joke too obvious, and, therefore, too much for the TV-14 rating, which is why it was cut).
    • A scene cut for time in which one of Stewie's final requests before he allegedly dies is to star in a body pain commercial.
    • The cutaway of Dick Cheney greeting people at Walmart with "Go fuck yourself" has "fuck" bleeped out on the free-TV version and the censored DVD audio.
    • An extra scene before Peter confronts his former bully has Peter re-enacting a defecating butt using a hoodie closed up around his face and a candy bar sliding through the hole of the hoodie. This scene is only on the DVD version.
  • Country Matters: Alluded to when Brian notices a mole on Stewie. Brian suggests it could be the "c" word.
    Stewie: What the hell does that have to do with anything?
    Brian: No, cancer.
    Stewie: Oh, I, I thought you meant, well, it's not important.
  • Face–Heel Turn: Peter when he becomes a bully.
  • He Who Fights Monsters: Subverted. Peter only becomes a bully because Kyle tells him how much fun it is, not because Peter wants to beat up bullies. He does, however, decide to take out his aggression on his former high-school bully Randy, who is no longer a threat due to his multiple sclerosis, because Peter thinks he's the source of his own bullying problem, but Chris stops him because it just proves that Peter is no better than his own bully.
  • Jerk Ass: Kyle and Peter.
  • Mood-Swinger: Quagmire while playing golf, who curses up a storm and in the same breath is calm:
    Joe: Hey, Quagmire, you know it's not fun when you're like this.
    Quagmire: You want fun? Go home and buy a monkey!
    Cleveland: What does that even mean?!
    Quagmire: I don't know! Boy, we've got a beautiful day for this.
  • No-Holds-Barred Beatdown: Peter gives one to Kyle after he is repeatedly mocked.
  • The Other Darrin: Invoked in a cutaway about Muppets characters who got different voice actors after Jim Henson passed away.
  • Porn Stache: Stewie drew a pencil mustache when he got a tan:
    Stewie: I like it 'cause it's just above my lip. It's the kind of mustache that says, "Yeah, I've been nude on camera. What of it?"
  • Rule of Three: In a flashback, Randy pulls Peter's pants down three times, prompting Peter to say, "Rrrrrandy!"
    • Actually, he pantses Peter twice, then pulls his pants up when Peter tries to use the urinal, but it's treated as the same prank.
  • Shout-Out: One of Stewie's final wishes should he die of cancer is to visit the Chicago Museum of Art.
  • Trivially Obvious:
    Lois: Peter, I think one of us should go over and have a talk with Kyle's parents.
    Peter: I'll do it, Lois. Right after a healthy breakfast of juice, toast and store brand imitation frosted flakes featuring Terry the Tiger.
    Terry the Tiger: Theyyyyyyyy're food!
  • Villain Protagonist: Peter when he becomes a bully.
  • Vomit Indiscretion Shot: Peter chasing Meg around the kitchen table while farting towards her eventually causes Meg to fall down and throw up.
    Peter: (disgusted) Ohhh, in the kitchen, Meg?!