"You should know that my first response to an inveterate raiser is to shove chips down his or her throat until they shit like a slot machine."
"Flint Paper once told me, and I quote, 'Bad cards are no reason to get beaten up by a bunch'a humps.'"
"Best strategy when fighting Heavy Weapons Guy, is not to fight Heavy Weapons Guy."
"Of course I've got the best cards, man! That's what they call me! Got The Best Cards Man!"
"There's no quicker way to turn the hotties off than by being a terrible poker player, man."
—Strong Bad again