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Carly: So how's Freddie?
"Mwahahaha... Oh come on! If you don't laugh it just seems mean..."
—Barney, How I Met Your Mother
"How much humor can we milk out of psychotic behavior? Find out this fall! Only on Marvel/DC!
—This trailer  for Season 3 of I'm a Marvel... And I'm a DC
"It's only funny until someone gets hurt... then it's frickin' hilarious!"
—T-shirt slogan
"Comedy's a dead art form. Now tragedy- that's funny."
—Bender, Futurama
Richard III is Shakespeare's first great comedy. Okay, I know that it gets listed as a tragedy. But, y'see, a tragedy is where a lot of people get killed, and you feel sorry for some of them. In Richard III, a lot of people get killed, and you don't feel sorry for any of them.
Black Mage [winking]: Because it seemed excessively cruel!
"Whenever someone gets run over, I giggle. Does that make me a bad person?"
—Anon
Gary: Right now you are down and out, And feelin' really crappy... Nicky: I'll say. Gary: But when I see how sad you are, It sorta makes me... happy! Nicky: Happy?! Gary: Sorry, Nicky; human nature! Nothin' I can do; It's schadenfreude, Makin' me feel glad that I'm not you! Eddie, matter of factly: You know, it's funny. They say that television encourages violence. But I'm smashing his face in, and we haven't got one!
—Eddie Hitler, Bottom
Comedy is death, HATREDY. / Step before the spotlight, / Laughter is your death-right / Crash and burn in horror
Make them squirm / Want to leave / After they / buy their drinks
I hate this audience / Regardless of applaudience / Like to take you away / Burn you in piles of hate
I hate the talent here / So dull and so full of fear
I'll beat you all to the punch / With an axe and a hack to the guts
I'll take the microphone stand / Run it through your neck
Cut off both your hands / Is this thing even fucking on?
Are you fucking deaf / Or just too scared to run?
Please take my wife, please take my wife / Then I’ll take your wife, then I’ll fuck your wife
Just a fucking joke, though its kinda' not / There’s a little truth in every single shot
Fueled by hate / Await your fate / Your time has come / To die on stage
It's funny / Because it's not
Dr. Ivo Robotnik disguised as Santa Claus: Ah, hap-PINESS is always so much more enjoyable when it's based on the misery of millions.
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