- From the first episode: Caaaarl! That kills people!
Carl: My stomach was makin' the rumblies that only hands could satisfy.
Paul: What is wrong with you, Carl?
Carl: Well, I kill people and I eat hands—that's two things.
- From the second episode:
Paul: You were headbutting children off the side of the ship!
Carl: That must have been horrifying to watch.
Paul: And then you started making out with the ice sculpture.
Carl: Well thank God the children weren't on board to see it!
Carl: Shh - do you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness.
Paul: That's the sound of people drowning, Carl!
Carl: That is what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence.
- From the third episode:
Carl: That was a foot - I appear to have swallowed an entire person.
Paul: That would be the hotel bartender.
Carl: Well, that explains why my Mojito is taking so long.
Paul: It was horrifying! Your mouth unhinged like a snake!
Carl: Wow that sounds pretty awesome!
- After Carl discovers his friend is a man named Paul.
Carl: Well... If you excuse me, I have some pictures to delete from my computer...
- From the fourth episode:
Paul: You've gone too far this time, Carl!
: What's that? It's hard to hear you over the sound of melting city!