Film / Watch Your Stern

Captain Foster: There you are, Bill. This is what this little trip's all about.

Commander Fanshawe: Mmm, "top-secret", eh?

Captain Foster: Means that every man in the flotilla knows about it already.

— Captain David Foster showing First Lieutenant Commander Bill Fanshawe the plans for the Creeper, the new acoustic torpedo.

Watch Your Stern is a 1960 film starring Kenneth Connor, Eric Barker, Leslie Phillips, Joan Sims, Noel Purcell, Hattie Jacques, Spike Milligan, Eric Sykes, and Guest Star Sid James. Despite being produced and directed by Peter Rogers and Gerald Thomas, and having a few of the films' stars, this film was not part of the Carry On... Series.

Onboard the Royal Navy warship HMS Terrier, Captain David Foster (Barker) and First Lieutenant Commander Bill Fanshawe (Phillips) are testing a new top-secret acoustic torpedo, the Creeper. When Commander Phillips (Ed Devereaux) arrives to discuss plans for the Creeper, Ordinary Seaman Blissworth (Connor) accidentally destroys the secret plans. Now Captain Foster, Commander Fanshawe, and Captain Foster's sister, Ann (Sims), have to try and hide the fact from Admiral Sir Humphrey Pettigrew (Purcell), while Blissworth fails to retrieve the only surviving plan from Commander Phillips using Commander Fanshawe's bicycle.

To trick Pettigrew, Blissworth is disguised as Potter, a scientist meant to visit the Terrier who had been held up, using a fake accent, glasses, and the beard of Chief Petty Officer Mundy (James) and uses the cold room refrigeration plan of Ranjid (Milligan) and another dockyard electrician (Sykes) as the Creeper plans. Hilarity Ensues as the real scientist is revealed to be a woman, Agatha Potter (Jacques), who is due to arrive and give away the game.

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Watch Your Tropes:

• Absent-Minded Professor: Blissworth's portrayal of Potter comes off to Captain Foster as a bit eccentric, whereas Admiral Pettigrew thinks he is drunk.
• Affectionate Nickname:
  • Some of the sailors on the Terrier call Blissworth "Blissy".
  • Miss Foster uses the former and also calls Commander Fanshawe "Billy".
  • Admiral Pettigrew used to call Miss Potter "Yar", so she called him "Uncle Humpers" in return.
• All for Nothing: Despite Blissworth finally getting his chance to help improve the Creeper at the end of the film, it malfunctions just as the Mark I had and sinks the Terrier.
• All There in the Script: While Blissworth and Andrews' ranks are not outright stated in the film, they are an "Ordinary Seaman" and "Commander", respectively.
• Ask a Stupid Question...: When Admiral Pettigrew sees Chief Mundy not-so-discreetly dispose of Commander Fanshawe's bicycle:
  Admiral Pettigrew: I distinctly saw a bicycle pass that porthole a moment ago.
  Commander Fanshawe: Which direction was it going, sir?
  Admiral Pettigrew: Downwards, you idiot! Downwards into the harbour!
  Commander Fanshawe: Was anybody on it, sir?
  Admiral Pettigrew: Of course not!
• Ass Shove: When Commander Fanshawe tells Chief Mundy that he knows what he can do with his bicycle, Chief Mundy's first thought is that Commander Fanshawe is telling him he can stick it up his arse.
• Attractive Bent-Gender: When discussing disguising Blissworth as Miss Potter, Commander Fanshawe warns Miss Foster not to make him too attractive, knowing what Admiral Pettigrew is like. When the disguised Blissworth meets Admiral Pettigrew, he instantly tells her how attractive she looks.
• Baldness Angst: Miss Foster lies to Chief Mundy that Captain Foster is suffering from this so he will shave his beard, believing it to be for a hair transfusion, when in reality, his beard will be used to disguise Blissworth as Potter in front of Admiral Pettigrew.
• Blackmail: When Commander Phillips discovers that his copy of the Creeper plans have been stolen and replaced with the cold room refrigeration plan, Captain Foster gets him to keep his mouth shut by warning him that one word from him and he'll have him court-martialed for neglect of duty.
• Brief Accent Imitation:
  • Blissworth briefly adopts a Scottish accent before accepting a drink from Commander Fanshawe, which gives Miss Foster the idea for him to use one while disguised as Potter in front of Admiral Pettigrew, so he won't figure out who he is.
  • When Blissworth is to be disguised as Miss Potter, he has to use a high-pitched voice, which Captain Foster helps him get right.
• Brownface: Ranjid is yet another character Spike Milligan played in brown makeup with a silly accent.
• The Casanova: Commander Fanshawe is famous for his experience with the girls:
  Commander Fanshawe: Watch it. He's a bit of a wolf, you know.
  Miss Foster: Baker, a "wolf"?
  Commander Fanshawe: Mm hm.
  Miss Foster: Well, that's a laugh coming from you.
• Comically Missing the Point:
  • When Blissworth is asked if there is any Coke onboard the Terrier for Commander Phillips, he gets confused and remarks that the ship burns oil fuel.
  • On the topic of Captain Foster's malfunctioning bell, Blissworth mentions that he's doing his best to locate the trouble, only for Captain Foster to tell him to look in the mirror. However, Blissworth doesn't understand he's been insulted at first and wonders what a mirror could do to muck up an electrical circuit.
  • As Captain Foster and Commander Fanshawe try to bluff their way through explaining the plans for the Creeper, Admiral Pettigrew sees Commander Fanshawe's bicycle fall past the porthole just as they get up to explaining the homing mechanism. When Admiral Pettigrew asks if he just saw a bicycle, Commander Fanshawe thinks he's still talking about the plans and remarks that it's definitely part of the homing mechanism.
• Disguised in Drag: When Miss Potter is due to arrive at the Terrier, Blissforth is disguised as her, so the destruction of the Creeper plans won't be found out. When the real Miss Potter arrives, she is herself mistaken for a spy in disguise as a woman.
• Driven to Suicide: Captain Foster after being told by Admiral Pettigrew that Miss Potter is on her way to look at the Creeper plans, which will reveal that the plans were actually destroyed:
  Captain Foster: Get me my sword, Bill. I'm about to commit hara-kiri.
• Drives Like Crazy: Blissworth is ordered to ride Commander Fanshawe's bicycle as fast as possible to catch up to Commander Phillips' car and retrieve the Creeper plans, which only causes him to ride into Admiral Pettigrew and knock him into a crate.
• Dogged Nice Guy: Blissworth is keen on Miss Foster but keeps it to himself as he believes that she has something going on with Commander Fanshawe, unaware that it is actually he that she desires.
• Downer Ending: The film ends with the Terrier sunk and Blissworth, Captain Foster, and Commander Fanshawe all out of a job.
• Embarrassing Nickname: Chief Mundy is called the "Creeper" by Blissworth.
• Fauxreigner: When Blissworth is disguised as Potter, Miss Foster tells him to use a Scottish accent to diguise his voice from Admiral Pettigrew.
• The Film of the Play: The film was based on Something About a Sailor by Earle Couttie.
• Fingore: When Blissworth tries to mend Captain Foster's bell, he causes a small explosion that singes his fingers and so has to wet them until the pain dies down.
• Get Out!: As Admiral Pettigrew barks orders over the phone for Captain Foster to search for Potter, his Flag Lieutenant gets in his way as he paces back and forth, so he orders for him to "get the hell out of here".
• The Ghost:
  • Lieutenant Baker, whose cabin Miss Foster has been allowed to use.
  • Blissworth's Auntie Bessie, who he believes he looks like when he is disguised as Miss Potter.
  • Admiral Sir Lumley Potter, an old friend of Admiral Pettigrew's and Miss Potter's father.
• Gossipy Hens: The sailors spread rumours that Miss Foster and Commander Fanshawe are keen on each other. When Miss Foster finds out she calls them a load of old women.
• Handbag of Hurt: When the Security Sergeant believes Miss Potter is a spy, she retaliates by swinging her bag at Nobby and his men.
• Hard-Work Montage: One near the end of the film shows Blissworth and Miss Potter improving the Creeper together.
• I Need a Freaking Drink: After Captain Foster realises that Admiral Pettigrew will make him carry on with the Creeper trials despite the previous one ending with the sinking of the Fox, he asks Commander Fanshawe for another glass of gin:
  Captain Foster: Well, the Admiral won't abandon the Creeper trials just because of this hitch. That means I'll be firing ship next time.
  Andrews: Well, what's worrying you? Can't you swim?
  Commander Fanshawe: Ah, ha-ha, ha, huh-huh.
  Captain Foster: Give me another drink, Number One, please. Strong one.
• Interrupted Intimacy: Admiral Pettigrew's advances on Blissworth (disguised as Miss Potter) are interrupted by the Flag Lieutenant barging in on them with news of the real Miss Potter (believed to be a spy) being captured, much to Blissworth's relief.
• The Millstone: Blissworth means well, but everything he tries to mend causes trouble for Captain Foster:
  Blissworth: Well, I'm doing my best to locate the trouble, sir.
  Captain Foster: Look in the mirror. You'll find it.
• Mistaken Identity: Miss Potter is held up on her way to the Terrier before anyone meets her, so Blissworth disguises himself as her to hide the fact that the Creeper plans have been destroyed. Once the real Miss Potter arrives, she is assumed to be a spy.
• Musical Chores: Chief Mundy and a sailor sing "Drunken Sailor" as they retrieve Commander Fanshawe's bicycle from over the side of the Terrier with a fishing rod.
• Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: When Blissworth sees the Creeper plans, he starts altering them to make them better. Once he realises what he's done, he tries to erase his edits only to spill gin on the paper. To make matters worse, he hangs the plans in front of the heater to dry off the gin, only for the heater to burn a hole through it.
• No Full Name Given:
  • We don't get to know Ranjid or Nobby's last names.
  • The same can be said for Blissworth, Chief Mundy, Commander Phillips, Andrews, and Clark's first names.
• Oh, Crap!: When Blissworth realises he's just knocked down Admiral Pettigrew with his bicycle, all he can say is "Cor, crikey".
• Rhymes on a Dime: When Admiral Pettigrew orders the arrest of Potter:
  Captain Foster: Potter, an imposter?
  Admiral Pettigrew: Yes, Foster, an imposter!
• Running Gag: Commander Fanshawe's bicycle being repeatedly thrown overboard and fished back onto the Terrier.
• Screw This, I'm Outta Here: After Blissworth knocks down Admiral Pettigrew with a bike, his first instinct is to ride away as fast as he can.
• Shout-Out: Miss Foster and Chief Mundy call each other "Samson and Delilah" as she cuts his beard off.
• Speak in Unison: As Blissworth, Captain Foster, and Commander Fanshawe watch the Creeper begin homing back in on the Terrier, they mutter "Most peculiar" at the same time. After the three of them lose their jobs due to the sinking of the Terrier, they again mutter "Yes, most peculiar".
• Special Guest: Sid James as Chief Petty Officer Mundy.
• Spoonerism: When Captain Foster tries to stop Admiral Pettigrew from thinking Potter is an imposter:
  Captain Foster: Well, but... that's impotterable, sir.
  Admiral Pettigrew: What's "impotterable", Foster?
  Captain Foster: Well, sir, imposterable that, er, Potter should be an infoster, er, "poster", sir.
• Strong Family Resemblance: When Blissworth is disguised as Miss Potter, his first thought is that he looks like his Auntie Bessie.
• Stuff Blowing Up:
  • The Fox testing the Creeper Mark I ends with it homing back in on the Fox and sinking it.
  • Blissworth's attempts to mend Captain Foster's bell end with an explosion firing out from a hole in the cabin wall.
  • When the Terrier tests the Creeper Mark II, it does the same as the Mark I had and sinks the Terrier.
• Tagline: "Watch your head - you'll laugh it off!".
• The Teetotaler: Blissworth doesn't drink, which causes trouble for him when he is disguised as Potter, who Captain Foster insists drinks like a fish.
• Those Two Guys:
  • Captain Foster and Commander Fanshawe share most of their scenes, as they are the two highest-ranking men onboard the Terrier.
  • Ranjid and the other civilian electrician are always seen together.
• Two Words: I Can't Count: When Blissworth is pretending to explain the Creeper plans to Admiral Pettigrew:
  Blissworth: I'll put it all into one simple word.
  Admiral Pettigrew: Good.
  Blissworth: Yes... "Magnetic-acoustic-neutralisation". How's that, sir?
  Admiral Pettigrew: Surely that's more than one word?
  Blissworth: There's two hyphens.
• Undercrank: One shot of Commander Fanshawe's bicycle going over the side of the Terrier is sped up.
• "Ugly American" Stereotype: Commander Fanshawe and Captain Foster see Commander Phillips as one.
  Commander Fanshawe: Commander Phillips to see you, sir.
  Captain Foster: Who?
  Commander Fanshawe: The American Commander for the Creeper plans.
  Captain Foster: Oh, yes, I remember. What's he like?
  Commander Fanshawe: Like most Americans, sir.
  Captain Foster: Oh, pity.
• Verbal Backspace: When Blissworth is talking about the new acoustic torpedo:
  Blissworth: The acoustic torpedo Mark I, commonly known as the "Chief Petty O"- Oh, the "Creeper".
• V-Sign: When Chief Mundy calls Blissworth (disguised as Miss Potter) an "old boiler" behind his back, Blissworth overhears and shoots a V behind his head, much to the bemusement of Chief Mundy and the other sailors.
• Women Are Wiser: Miss Foster comes up with both of the plans to disguise Blissworth in order to save Captain Foster and Commander Fanshawe from getting court-martialled for the destruction of the Creeper plans.
• Wholesome Crossdresser: One of the girls in Miss Foster's show is played by a sailor in a wig.
• Your Costume Needs Work: When Miss Potter is being captured on suspicion of being a spy, the Security Sergeant laughs that "he" has a nerve trying to fool him by being dressed as a woman.

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