The Tea Series is a novel length fanfiction series written in multiple parts by Telanu on Walking the Plank[1]
. It has since been deleted, though many saved copies still are in circulation in fandom circles.
“Spare me,” Snape said, rolling his eyes. “Two years since and you’ve yet to pay up.”
“Well, give me time. Quirrell…ah, the worst of all. He tried to kill Harry.” Dumbledore’s eyes slid to half-mast. “Seeing a pattern here, Severus?”
“No. One of them was a murderer, the other was an idiot, and the third was just a little angel from heaven I evilly turned on,” Snape snarled. “Have I got it right? What the hell are you trying to – ”
“All three of them threatened Harry, Severus,” Dumbledore said gently. “And you hated them.”
Snape’s mouth worked itself open and shut for a minute.
The one in which Dumbledore has Snape in for a little chat, Harry and Snape are acting awfully strange around each other and Harry has a vision that indicates Snape may be in mortal danger. What will happen when Harry goes on his summer vacation? Will he save the Wizarding world, or will someone have to save him?
The Tea Series provided examples of:
- Abusive Parents - The Dursleys, but what's new?
- Age-Appropriate Angst - Harry spends the majority of the Tea Series more focused on his relationship with Snape than anything else, but then realizes that he hasn't been focusing on the very imminent threat of Voldemort even nearly as much as he needed to.
- Age-Gap Romance - Snape is older than Harry by at least twenty years.
- Anger Born of Worry - Snape's concern over Harry's suddenly quitting the Quidditch team and taking an abnormal interest in studying leads to the worst fight they've had yet as a couple, but it is resolved five minutes later when the argument devolves into them sleeping together.
- Balcony Wooing Scene - Harry realized Snape's feelings for him on a balcony during the Halloween feast, and they share their first kiss on said balcony.
- Beta Couple - Fleur and Minerva.
- Deadpan Snarker - Snape, because of course.
- Devoted to You - Snape is devoted to Harry to the point of obsession.
- Dirty Old Woman - It is heavily implied that Minerva's and Fleur's relationship is actually a direct parallel to Harry's and Snape's, and that Minerva very much feels like this because of her attraction to the much younger Fleur.
- Door Stopper - The entire series is 372, 495 words long, but is divided into parts.
- Everybody Lives - Thanks to Harry's method of taking out the Death Waters using the Furies, nobody other than Death Eaters (and Snape) die or is even injured, and the war is won without even the smallest of casualties.
- Fake Relationship - Harry and George.
- Fantastic Racism - Downplayed. Unlike other HP fanworks, the anti-Muggle sentiment among Slytherins isn't as omnipresent as in other HP fanfics.
- Flight of Romance - Harry saves Snape's life by flying off with him after saving him from the clutches of the Death Eaters. Unfortunately, Snape was unconscious for the entirety of it. Harry jokes about it later by saying be have Snape "the ride of his life".
- Forbidden Love - Snape and Harry are not only perceived to be on different sides of the war, but also happen to be a student and teacher. Snape's personality and mistreatment of his students hardly helps matters either.
- Held Gaze - Harry realizes the depth of Snape's feelings for him more than once just by holding his gaze.
- The"I Love You"Stigma - Harry and Snape have never told each other that they love each other, despite it being very obvious to the both of them. Their relationship is a happy one regardless.
- I Didn't Mean to Turn You On - Harry unintentionally gets Snape to fall in love with him by just being himself.
- Inconvenient Attraction - Harry realizing Snape's feelings for him and his own lack of digsust at the idea floors him, as he knows just what a terrible idea them being together would be. He then decides that doesn't really bother him.
- Insecure Love Interest - Snape is convinced that he needs to enjoy his relationship with Harry as much as he can now before Harry inevitably leaves him. The fact that Harry has no intentions of leaving him seems to fly over his head.
- Last Het Romance - Harry goes on a single date with Cho Chang, and then is "revealed" to "actually" be in a relationship with George Weasely very soon after. Harry feels guilty as it undoubtedly wasn't great for Cho's self esteem, even if he wasn't really in a relationship with George.
- Longing Look - Due to the taboo nature of their relationship, Harry's and Snape's interactions in public are relegated to just this. Since their relationship was so antagonistic in the past, this relatively goes unnoticed by the public at large. The Weasely twins, however, are smarter than that.
- Love Hurts - Harry realizes this very quickly after he and Snape break up following the Daily Prophet fiasco.
- Loving Bully - It is made clear throughout the series that Snape is even crueler towards Harry and to everyone in general when he is heartbroken.
- Mistaken for Cheating - Snape is very angry and cruel when the news of Harry's and George's relationship hits the papers. Harry is quick to point out to him that their relationship was faked to get press attention off of him and Snape, and even if it was real, Snape has no right to be upset as they were broken up.
- Nobody Thinks It Will Work - The idea if Harry and Snape being involved with each either is such an outlandish idea that most of the Hogwarts student body outright refuses to believe the Daily Prophet's claims. Even Harry and Snape know that there is no reason for their relationship to work, other than their mutual obsession and devotion to each other. And hey, they do make it work, so good for them.
- Official Couple Ordeal Syndrome - Harry and Snape have to deal with the difficulty of navigating what is already a taboo relationship on top of dealing with being forcibly outed by the press, being spied on, Neville attempting to quite literally *kill* Harry, the Furies holding Harry under their control, and that's just to name a few. They work for their happy ending.
- Old Man Marrying a Child - Though they are not married, it is acknowledged even by the characters themselves. Both Harry and Snape know their relationship would be perceived as such if revealed, and they are proven correct in their assumptions when Draco revealstheir relationship to the Daily Prophet. Granted, the claim is so outlandish that hardly anyone believes the Daily Prophet's claims.
- Relationship Sabotage - the antogonsists' schemes within the story mostly fall under this category.
- Second-Act Breakup - Harry and Snape breakup towards the middle of the series, when their relationship is revealed to the press against their will.
- Secret Relationship - Harry really doesn't want his friends to know about his relationship with Snape. Mostly, their relationship is kept so secret out of necessity, but it also becomes clear to the reader that their level of obsession with each other goes as far as to not wanting to share even the smallest details of their relationship together.
- She Is Not My Girlfriend - Even after their relationship is revealed to the press, Harry and Snape still deny they ever had a relationship with each other out if necessity.
- Stalker with a Crush - in the first installment of the series, Dumbledore makes it clear he knows about Snape's feelings for Harry. In the second installment, Snape deals with his feelings for Harry by following him around everywhere to the point where Hermione literally runs headfirst into him.
- Stalking is Love - Within the context of the series, Harry acknowledges that Snape following him around everywhere in the second installment *is* creepy, but from Snape's point of view, this method is his only way of coping with his emotions and gives him at least some form of happiness in his dreary existence.
- True Love is Exceptional - Harry is surprised that he's into Snape, of all people.
- Unbroken Vigil - Hermione and Ron are worried at Harry's disappearance and happen upon Snape standing vigil by an unconscious Harry who he is caring for in his own bed.
- Tsundere - Snape to the extreme, even though his obsession is glaringly obvious to Harry.
- What Does She See in Him? - George asks Harry this, about Snape. Harry doesn't really give an answer.
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Why Would Anyone Take Him Back? - Harry acknowledges that Snape acted appallingly terrible after their breakup, but it's a testament to himself as to how much he loves Snape that he's willing to give him a second chance - granted, that Snape actually puts in the work for it.
