Fanfic: Harry Potter and the Not-Fatal-At-All Cultural Exchange Program
Harry Potter and the Not-Fatal-At-All Cultural Exchange Program (continued here) is a Fate/stay night/Harry PotterFusion Fic by Pale Wolf.A Holy Grail War is brewing... but this is not your usual Holy Grail War. In this universe, the Masters and their Servants are converging on England to do battle. Nobody is quite sure where such a potent artefact came from - not the Church, not the Iranians, not the Japanese, not the mercenary, not the thrall of Voldemort, not the werewolves - but everyone has something they want out of it, and one Harry James Potter gets involved when he accepts the invitation in order to save Sirius Black during the events at the end of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Now part of this fracas, it's up to him and his Servant to step up to the bat and win... or die trying.Spoilery handy cheat sheet for Master and Servant identities at bottom of page. Also beware possible unmarked spoilers for all HP content up to the divergence point.
The Grail is NOT corrupted. Except it really is, and the participants don't know... because it's corrupted by canon Nasuverse's Angra Mainyu, rather than the local one, so the Iranians monitoring the local one haven't noticed anything out of the ordinary.
In Scene 22 it's mentioned that Kayneth Archibald was the DADA teacher two years before Quirrel.
Anticlimax: The Japan/Britain treaty issue, the prime motivator for the Kuzukis— which they murdered Fudge over— is solved by Amelia Bones simply nullifying the treaty without any flair, completely flooring Saki, who didn't even have a chance to negotiate.
In scene 21, Faolan's inner monologue uses a variation of this to praise Harry.
He had been quite impressive. Nothing like his reputation - neither a terrible dark child nor a burgeoning demigod of magic - but instead, something far more deadly: A driven, clever young man, quick on his wits. It was unfortunate they were opponents, she rather liked him.
Broadly speaking, skills (as in, actual skills - knowledge, how good they are with a sword, tactics, etc) always come in full, and generally receive 'modern era' upgrades - Cultural Archer is massively enjoying this with guns and IEDs out the ass, riders have some idea what to do with 'modern mounts', and Gilgamesh actually knows which end of the sword you stab the other guy with.
Ascended Fanboy: Downplayed, but Assassin's entire behaviour and fighting style seems to be a literal love letter to Arturia. He acts like a Knight in Shining Armor, created his own version of Excalibur, can cast Invisible Air, and has created his own variant of Prana Burst (Sword). Because he's actually Shirou.
Beleaguered Bureaucrat: The author's take on Dumbledore is that he is genuinely competent, but his need to struggle with multiple highly demanding hats is what creates the impression of incompetence.
Best Served Cold: In Scene 31 Amelia says that vengeance for something "Crouch" - no idea if this is either of the canonical Barty Crouch or someone else - did is one of the motivations Ettore has for getting involved in the War.
Black Comedy: A lot of Harry's internal commentary amounts to this.
How does Ettore di Rosetti, an Italian criminal wanted by the British Magical community, enter the country undetected? He flies in on a muggle airplane.
Harry's fighting style is a magical version of this. He's not a showy magical genius like Voldemort or Dumbledore, a crazy Servant level Kung-Fu Wizard like Faolan, nor does he have a powerful Origin like Shahrizad, but his ability to spam Killing Curses like they're Tickle Charms can make him a credible threat to far more powerful fighters.
Charles Atlas Superpower: Being a Nasuverse crossover this is fully in play. Saber outright says in her first scene that Kotomine is approaching Heroic Spirit level.
Mundane Utility: Shahrizad uses fire magic to clean herself in Scene 20. In Scene 23 she uses the Killing Curse to get rid of the lingering effects of Faolan's attack. Apparently there was linguistic drift between the original Aramaic and what the English wizards know of it.
Astarte is a Master of Illusion. Problem is, in a straight fight she's theoretically the weakest of the Masters. Of course, in the Nasuverse things rarely are so straightforward.
Dumbledore's Army and the Order of the Phoenix are pretty competent wizards, but of the lot perhaps only Dumbledore and Snape would last more than a few seconds against any of the War's participants, and Harry knows it. That's why he wants them to stay out of the way.
Perception Filter: Lancer appears to have this talent - or full-on invisibility, it's not particularly clear - as Dalton doubts his having seen her.
Subverted, as it turns out that his confusion was due to her simply assuming her astral form right before her appearance fully registered.
Dalton Wolfram of the Unspeakables is willing to hear Harry out, offers to use Veritaserum on himself to establish trust, and makes an agreement with Harry to let the latter do as he needs to in order to fight the War. He takes it very well when Harry starts spamming Killing Curses in an attempt to defeat Faolan.
Amelia Bones is a far more competent and reasonable Minister than Fudge.
Right Hand Versus Left Hand: Both Astarte and Faolan converged on Number 4, Privet Drive intending to capture Harry for Voldemort. Neither knew the other was working for Voldemort. Both being Masters, a fight naturally broke out.
Ron the Death Eater: Parodied in Scene 9, where Fudge stumbles his way into the logic used to come up with "Evil Manipulative Dumbledore" fanon.
Seen It All: Harry's general attitude to all this weirdness.
Shell-Shocked Veteran: The interpretation of Harry here is someone way too comfortable with death and fighting even before you take his age into account.
Though he wasn't that Archer, regardless of how hard he'd freaked when he'd first seen that bastard's face staring him in the mirror - growing up was crappy enough when you didn't include 'realizing that asshole was you all along'.Explanation Though the preceding lines suggest it, this is the clearest implication that Assassin is Shirou Emiya. Yes, Fate route Shirou, not EMIYA in ALLCAPS.
a normal person could not cast Avada Kedavra so easily. The problem was, it was that particular form of insanity that began around where the subject forgot human limitations, and ended before human morals fell by the wayside. Just crazy enough to pull off the impossible.
You Gotta Have Blue Hair: Invoked by the werewolves; by having distinctive and unique hair colours, it reduces the likelihood that witnesses to a crime will mistake them for the perp.
Handy cheat sheet for Master and Servant identities (SPOILERS!)