About a third to half of the humor in any given episode of Baywatching is Allison's interpretations, as well as the wacky voices she gives to each character:
- Mitch is a David Hasselhoff Self-Insert/Marty Stu that is obsessed with being the best at everything, to the point of claiming that he's saved over a million people.note
- Eddie Kramer was probably abandoned as a baby because of his ego, growing up to be a whiny and useless manchild who fails at being Troubled, but Cute and has a weird Oedipus complex-like situation with any older women who are nice to him. Him having a one-off fling at 15 with a married woman (accused of murder) is probably why he acts so insufferable,note especially when he's somewhat reluctant to help Shaunie from being abused by her Tall, Dark, and Handsome boyfriend, because she rejected him.
- Shaunie Mcclain, a rich girl who is, for some reason, interested in Eddie, mostly because she probably doesn't know anything else or better, due to her sheltered life. Allison was deeply apologetic when Shaunie accepted Eddie's marriage proposal and left the show as his wife.
- Hobie (and his "clone") is a future chick magnet who often gets a Girl of the Week, much to Allison's disgust.
- Garner Ellerbee is an ace cop who has off-screen rage issues and is constantly underappreciated, punching his boss in the face if he takes advantage of him.note No colleagues like him — every police officer that appears in the show immediately gets into a passive-aggressive threat match with him — but if he was fired, the force would collapse.
- Craig Pomeroy was somewhat of a Team Dad, but is less like A Father to His Men and more of an uncool old man in a younger man's body who is a foil to Mitch's 1990s' awesomeness.
- Jill was a walking A Death in the Limelight, despite the episode where she turned amateur sleuth when a serial killer was around. When Jill was eventually killed off, Allison couldn't hold back her cackles.
- Allison was shocked to discover how diverse the cast was in season one before the series decided to focus on the eye candy, with Bridge Bunnies that didn’t look like they’d stepped out of a fashion magazine, such as the heavyset Sid at the desk, and staff of all ages, like the junior lifeguard trainees, Captain Thorpe and Ben "Lifeguard Old Man" Edwards. After the season shuffles, the stories about Thorpe and Old Man's mid-life crises being added into the episodes at random tired Allison out because both them and their stories were slowing Baywatch down, for her. Weirdly, Lifeguard Old Man’s actor played a lifeguard who died in the pilot film, so LOM could literally be haunting Baywatch beach, which — considering the episodes about alien abductions and ghosts — wouldn’t be far-fetched for the show.
- Trevor Cole is Australian but incompetent. Although he can be as creepy towards women as the other lifeguards, Allison called him The Greatest Season 1 Baywatch Character who went too soon.
- Harvey The Worst is a smug Casanova Wannabe who is self-centered and exploits people's misery, either for monetary gain or to get into a girl's pants. Allison's Berserk Button is when women are charmed by his "flirting".
- Stephanie Holden is a spiteful Smug Snake who always needs the upper hand and the last word to atone for making the Olympic team the year that Team USA boycotted, especially against Mitch, her ex. Despite being a control freak, she is constantly preoccupied with hunks of the week or Mitch or her on-off boyfriend with a sailboat.
- CJ Parker, a New-Agey free spirit and amiable ditz who happens to have whatever hobby the writers wanted to center her (often romantic) subplot around that week.
- Matt "Eyebrows" Brody, an exceedingly French rich boy who doesn't have any real problems until his parents leave the country and take the money with them and who receives absolutely zero respect from Stephanie.
- Jimmy Slade only gets the attention of girls because he's a handsome award-winning Surfer Dude, not because of his Dull Surprise and obliviousness to basic social cues and that he doesn't understand why cheating on his girlfriend is wrong.
- Guido, who Allison calls worse than Harvey, is an Ethnic Scrappy who has distracting Mood Whiplash B-plots.
- Logan is Australian but incompetent, whose succeeded with his goal of leaving the Australian Transatlantic Equivalent Baywatch. Interestingly, he was brought in because the showrunners "finally had a bad boy to write about", but Baywatching viewers pointed out that they seemed to had forgotten about John D. Cort. The thing that concerns Allison the most is that his actor was openly gay, yet his character was a wannabe fashion designer who had a B-plot about AIDS.
- Allison loathes Caroline Holden, a bitter sea witch (also Stephanie's sister) who whinges a lot.
- Neely Capshaw is a wannabe troll who is bad at being evil.
- Cody was The Scrappy of the series, to fans of Baywatch, and Allison concluded that it was because he looked stupid.
