The Good, The Bad and The Spandex

Something was off, and Freezer didn't like it. Here was some guy Freezerburn had never heard of, and he was walking with an air of cockiness that made him wonder if the guy had some kind of magic tricks up his sleeve or if he was just that overconfident.

Taking another step back to steady himself, Freezerburn reached down and slammed his hands against the floor, causing a slippery sheet of ice to cover the ground between him and the mystery man. The ice sheet continued under the mans feet, leaving him without a solid, stable floor for his feet to grip onto. Then, following up, he sent a thin, wide-spread blast of water across the ice, increasing its slickness about as much as was realistically possible and - ideally - covering the mans legs in water that he could then freeze as well.

"Not if I knock you on yours first!"

Simon looked at the ice patch between him and the supervillain.

He then gave the latter a look of disapproval.

"Bah, you ain't worth it" he said, and turned away.

He took three steps-

-and then, in one fluid motion, turned around, ran up to the ice and jumped over it, legs first, straight at Freezerburn!!

edited 15th Jul '16 6:51:54 PM by Sijo

"Ughf!"

The kick hit hard, sending Freezer flying a short ways before he rolled across the ground.

"Well played." Freezerburn said as he picked himself up. He was far more angry at himself than the new guy, having let himself get overconfident, creating an opening for his opponent to exploit.

On the bright side, the guy had limited himself to nothing more than a flying kick. Which gave Freezer two piece of information - one, he was really good at kung fu. And two? Kung fu was probably the most dangerous skill this guy was packing.

"Got a name?" Freezerburn said as he stood there, prepping himself to make his next move. "Or are they going to have to send you to the emergency room as a 'John Doe'?"

Simon stopped walking, smiled, and said, "My name is-"

-And then he took off in a full-body rush at Freezerburn!

"-THE GUY WHO STOMPED YOUR BUTT!"

edited 15th Jul '16 7:06:43 PM by Sijo

One, two, three, the fireballs flew, each one aimed at the dead center of the mystery man's mass.

"You got a weird obsession with kicking people's butts." Freezerburn said as the flaming projectiles neared their target.

"Guess I'll just call you 'Buttstomped'."

FAWWWSH!!! Simon literally disappeared under the impact of the fireballs!

For a moment, only smoke could be seen. Then as it began to clear-

-Simon stood revealed. And he had- changed.

His whole body, including his clothes, had turned an ashen grey. He had adapted to the intense heat- making him, for all purposes, fireproof.

"Thanks, pal!" he said, in a tone that was actually half-honest. And then he took off again-

-except this time, he headed not towards Freezerburn, but towards the Nazis, who had, for the most part, stopped to watch the strange fight.

The truth was, Simon didn't care about the villain or the flying machine- at least, not right now. His priority was protecting the endangered people. When the Pseudo-Nazis saw the transformed man running towards them, they freaked out, and began shooting at him! While the bullets took some chips off his body, he didn't feel anything; it was like he made of asbestos or something. He was actually glad: the more they focused on him, the less they would think about harming the hostages.

He slammed into one of the Nazis, bowling him over and knocking him out. Three down Simon mentally counted. That left three.

edited 15th Jul '16 8:55:06 PM by Sijo

"Yeah, well I noticed shit too. You're the only person or thing that can move in the frozen time. You would've killed me already if you could." The Bear backed up some more, back into the alleyway. The money on the ground fluttered and rattled and flew up over Joie de Vivre's head, before fitting neatly into the gap between buildings and forming a wall between them. "So I can't beat you, I guess. This is the next best thing. Hold on, lemme get this."

The Bear pulled out her phone and started texting Mindseye back as she walked backwards, making a retreat. What am I negotiating exactly?

edited 15th Jul '16 9:02:07 PM by Taco

Irving Investigations office

Superior Industries hired my agency to investigate you.

They're in the middle of a transaction and you're bringing them bad publicity.

I have reason to believe their activities are less than legal.

You don't seem to have any great love for them.

What say you and I team up to see what they're trying to hide?

Give them as much bad publicity as possible.

Ilene finished typing and leaned back in her chair. It was entirely possible this wouldn't work, but it felt right to admit upfront that Superior Industries had hired her. Maybe the Bear would be impressed by her honesty.

And maybe she'd find out what it was like to get punched by a money fist. Ilene sighed.

For a moment, Freezerburn could only look at 'Buttstomped' in confusion. While he quickly figured out what was going on, his confusion remained as Buttstomped wandered off.

"He was baiting me?" Freezer wondered. It was the only good explanation he could think of. He wasn't sure how it worked, but clearly his now former opponent had some way of taking energy and using it to transform somehow.

He'd have to keep that in mind for if they ever met again. For now, he wasn't going to question the fact that Buttstomped was basically letting him go.

Turning back to the train, Freezer quickly climbed up to the engine control room. What he found was both what he had and what he hadn't expected. It was far more high-tech looking than any train he'd ever seen before, and when he looked for a way to turn it on, he discovered that it appeared to require a key of some kind.

"A key?" He thought out loud. "It needs a key? What kind of stupid train needs a key?"

He looked around to see if it was inside the train anywhere, possibly left in any of the obvious locations. The key, however, was nowhere to be found. Whether lost, or tucked away in storage, or on display somewhere else in the museum, the key wasn't anywhere that Freezer could count on finding it quickly.

"Guess I'll have to hotwire it." He thought out-loud with minor exasperation.

The alleyway

Joie was more disappointed than angry when her opponent decided that going into an alleyway and then having the way in blocked by all of the coins in the street, which was impressive considering just how much of it were needed to block the way but the Bear could only had so much to go up so high, and Joie won't wait for the Bear to finish her conversation on her phone. She wasn't exactly in the mood for some rock climbing but not a walk in park and this certainly gives it a bit of a twist.

She started to dig her foot into the money wall, slowly at first, then started to do the same with the other foot, this time quicker to get a grip in the wall. Before she knew it, she's standing rightside up the wall. Bunch of thoughts were racing through her head right now but "This is fun" takes the forefront.

She continued to walk up the wall, her foot piercing into it with a sort of an intense rhythm as she said "Oh good grief, killing you? You know how companies have each other to be competition and they become stronger because of the competitiveness? Same thing here. Besides, you're so adorable with the way you look and act, killing you would be like gutting a live kitty, or a bear cub, in your case..."

She paused her own speech to finish her climb and stand on top of the wall. "And you're giving up, already?" she continued as she leaned on one leg and her arms crossed. "You don't even learn my weakness yet? And who knows, maybe it is I who will give you the time of your life, you sad cunt!"

Then, like an absolute madwoman, she jumped off the wall and careened herself to the Bear with a downward jumping elbow. Well, the muay thai technique is called jumping but in this case, she would guessed it would be modified to dropping.

"THE SUMMER BEGIIIIINS!" she yelled at around the halfway point.

edited 16th Jul '16 2:15:10 AM by sgtpendulum

Corvid continued grappling Neo-Nazis as someone else arrived. He didn't quite recognise them but if they wanted to lay claim to the train they could be a threat. Then somebody else, who seemed to have been here this whole time got into a fight with him and suddenly turned grey? That was unexpected but he decided to just let it slide and stay focused on the battle. The other guy managed to take out three, so that left fewer. Corvid bent his wings forward into a shield and dashed towards the nearest Nazi, digging his claws in to grab hold of him before trying to throw him at another of his comrades.

edited 16th Jul '16 4:25:20 AM by FerrousMaelstom

The Nazis concentrated their gunfire on Corvid but the bullets ricocheted off his wing-shields. Then one of them noticed Freezerburn messing around in the Flying Train.

"VAS? No!!'' He screamed, and he ran towards the machine, but didn't shoot, out of fear of damaging it.

Simon didn't care much about the War-Machine, but the Bird-Guy seemed to be doing OK on his own and he couldn't allow the Nazis to split up, that would make it more difficult to bring them down without innocents being hurt. So he ran after him and tackled him from behind with all his strength: "WHUFF!!''

He went down like a sack of potatoes. Simon took away his uzi and hurled it away.

Two left.

edited 16th Jul '16 6:51:56 AM by Sijo

Street Flirter 2 Super Turbo HD Remix

"Look, I really like being hella gay and hella violent too, but not while I'm trying to answer these texts." The Bear shot back as Joie de Vivre started climbing through her wall. As soon as she got off the ground, The Bear began zipping the coins and dollars back to herself, gathering and readying them while she mashed out another text. Um. Ask any of the workers. Long shifts, no unions, and dangerous work. Or like do you mean things other businesses don't do on the regular ?

The Bear put her phone in her pocket and watched Joie de Vivre go to the top of the wall. She started again skittering backwards as the girl started her drop and stepped onto a couple coins to boost herself more quickly backwards. As Joie de Vivre came down on her, The Bear's coins and dollars swooped in to drop a dome around her, slightly out of the reach of her aura as she kept walking backwards, towards the other end of the alley and another street. "So, like, am I gonna just kite you around town? Not sure I'd mind, every time you bust down one of my barriers is like my own little peep show with that outfit you've got."

edited 16th Jul '16 7:37:10 AM by Taco

Finally Arriving to the Easton City National Museum on His Glorious Segway - The Conductor

When he at last made it to the museum, the Conductor spotted a squadron of police cars already waiting for him. "Ah, have I been found out already...?! Well, 'no matter. Have at thee, enforcers!"

With one hand on the handle and the other on his baton, the Conductor weaved great arcs of electricity as he blasted the caught unawares police force, rolling up along the accessibility path as police cars flipped all around him in great sparkling explosions. Bullets fired, but his segway deftly dodged the shots, leading its master right to the front doors of the cornered museum, which he smashed open with a massive fist of lightning.

"WHO DARES HOLD THE CONDUCTOR'S LOCOMOTIVE IN A MUSEUM?!"

None of the people fleeing past him answered. They were too busy fleeing from the neo-Nazis to pay attention to the old man on a segway. Saying a brief "Hmm" to himself, Amadeus rode over to the museum map to find where his train was actually located, and casually wheeled past the retreating patrons.

Irving Investigations office

Ilene paused before typing again. The Bear wasn't mad at her, which was good, but it seemed like this was going to pass by without anything accomplished. In all honesty, Ilene would've preferred making her angry- at least that would have been something.

Precisely.

They're obviously worried you're going to accidentally reveal something they're trying to hide.

Aren't you curious as to what that is?

By the way, your opponent's source of power is the device on her chest. Destroy it and you win.

Good luck.

Ilene planned on not responding to any more messages. Best to build up an aura of mystique and let the Bear come to her. She wondered if she was coming across as too desperate.

Now all she could do was wait. And what better way to pass the time than to do some research into Superior's business practices. It had to be something business-related- embezzlement, fraud, poor environmental policies, the like. If she was lucky, she could probably find disgruntled employees or the like who would spill all of Superior's secrets.

Museum

Corvid noticed some hassle around the train but that wasn't his first priority; if somebody tried to just take it, it would be quite obvious. He approached another remaining Neo-Nazi and just flew straight at them, slamming them right into the wall.

At that point, something quite strange came into his head; music. He was used to constant 'coo's and 'caw's but music was new and this definitely wasn't just a song stuck in his head - it was coming from somewhere. For the moment, he pointed the pigeon at the entrance and continued pummeling Neo-Nazis.

Robert Sander's Office

"Hello~! Your call has successfully been forwarded to me! ...you're not seeking a merger, are you?" Sanders hear Tabitha Cobbeler's voice say over the phone.

"No, no! It's me, Mr. Sanders! Yes, it is about the Annual Children's Hospital Benefit. Can we count with your presence again this year? Now, I know you're busy, trust me I know how demanding dealing with businesses can be. But this year, we hope to get some of the city's other heroes, such as The Comet, to also attend. I'm looking into it right now. So, you wouldn't have to spend *that* much time in the activities. Would that be acceptable?"

Museum

The Comet managed to break into the museum, but he arrived at the wrong wing- though the sounds of gunshots could be heard not far away.

But then, MORE explosions rocket the place! Along with a thundering music that could be heard inside the minds of everyone in the museum!

GAAH! What now?? Simon mentally cursed. He heard screams too. He vacillated for a moment, wondering if he should investigate or finish dealing with the Nazis and Freezerburn first.

Finally, he decided to leave it to the Bird-Man, hoping he could handle the situation. He took off toward the museum entrance, where he was quite surprised by the sight of an old man crackling with electricity- and riding a segway? Huh.

And then the man shouted his own name. Oh, The Conductor. Of course. He must be behind the Nazis trying to recover his machine, he (wrongly) assumed. He had no idea how much his current form would protect him from the old villain's powers, but decided to charge at him anyway.

edited 16th Jul '16 8:00:51 PM by Sijo

Candy Cobbler Co. Headquarters
"Oh, of course Mr. Sanders! In fact, I was just about to call to register- you couldn't of had better timing~"

Tabitha takes a brief pause to contemplate, and continues speaking.

"...you don't think anything bad would happen with a bunch of heroes in one place, though, do you? Not that we can't defend ourselves, it's just that if we'd have to at all that would be bad for the charity's reputation." Much less mine...

Hotwiring the train was harder than Freezerburn was used to and easier than it seemed it should have been. The technology was old, and yet, still surprisingly advanced. While Freezer had no shortage of experience with this kind of vehicular theft - which was honestly what it was, he wasn't going to bother trying to justify it any other way - the ignition system was still something he had to piece together. Fortunately, everyone on the outside of the train was too busy fighting each other to truly bother him.

It was when he finally got the vehicle started that the music started.

"Say what now?"

It was tune he didn't recognize, something old. Classical, probably. Not sure what it was and assuming it was an internal train system, Freezerburn quickly started pushing buttons that looked like they might be responsible so he could turn it off.

Instead, more music joined what was already playing.

Freezerburn looked around a bit in confusion at both songs playing at the same time, overlapping. More with the angry voice that was clearly yelling at him. Did the train have a friggen AI system or something?

"Yeah, sorry Conductor." Freezer said. "But it looks like I'm about to take you for a ride."

A few more pushed buttons, flipped switches, and pulled triggers, and Freezer first found the train lifting up into the air, then shooting out musical lighting cannonballs. Without real aim or stability, the first BS Science cannonball bounce off the floor and smashed into a display case, throwing its contents across the room. The second shot into the museum entrance, blowing a hole in it large enough to drive through. Rather, to fly through, since it was located half-way up the wall.

"Woah." Freezerburn said, clearly impressed, almost like a kid discovering he'd found an empty candy store that he had free reign of.

"The Nazi's may have been a bunch of stupid jerks, but I'll give them this much." Freezer commented to himself. "They were certainly no slouches when it came to sneering at the laws of of science."

Getting a basic hang of the train, Freezerburn lifted it off the ground and began to fly forward, slowly at first, and then bursting out the hole he'd created at high speed.

"YAA-HOO!"

edited 17th Jul '16 1:43:03 AM by TheSpaceJawa

Easton City National Museum Hallway Leading to the Hole Where the Train Was - The Conductor

The sound of flapping wings and cooing was soon met with a violent ZAAAAAAAAAP, the pigeon abruptly falling down in shock from a sudden burst of electricity. "Goddamn flying pestilence, how did it even get inside..." the Conductor grumbled to himself as he zipped past various old super vehicles of yore. The crowd of panicking civilians thinned, making it easier to navigate his segway towards his exhibit of choice, before he noticed a man of ash beelining towards him.

"Ah, a vigilante come to get between me and my rightful property...? Very well!!!    I SHALL CREMATE YOU IN A CRACKLING CACOPHON-    wait, I recognize that soun- Oof!"

The Conductor was distracted by the roar of starting engines, the mighty vehicle of his prior ownership suddenly rising from the ground without its master, blaring music to clash against his own. This was just enough time to get tackled off his segway by Simon, sending both segway and twiggy villainous orchestrator tumbling to the ground. Groaning, the Conductor picked himself off the ground and with surprising strength, swung the segway at Simon like a mallet.

   "You bumbling baboon! YOU'VE LET SOMEONE CLAIM MY RIGHTFULLY STOLEN MASTERPIECE!"   

edited 16th Jul '16 11:28:09 PM by Starbound2

Alleyway

Really? Joie thought as she rolled out of the failed drop attack to absorb the fall damage, only to found herself to be caught in a coin dome, presumably to contain her from reaching the Bear ever.

"The Summer end..." she said with an unenthusiastic tone and clawed her way out of the dome with an apparent sluggish fashion and boredom and gave a lazy dash to the other side of the alleyway. "And begins. So, a peepshow, huh, Bear? Well...thanks, I guess, how flattering. I can give you more than a peepshow if that's what you...aww what am I doing?"

She kicked a random trash in annoyance, letting out a hopefully quiet whine before continuing "Of course you gonna kite me around, you're not planning to fight and you'll never will. The fight at the museum's already getting crowded and I don't want anyone helping me in a fight, let alone be the backup, a goddamned extra, to someone else's fight! You're the only one who's not fighting anyone AND available, so you know what? Fight's over! BUT!"

She held a finger up and pouted her cheeks to put up a more 'authoritative' bourgeois tone. "With one condition! This is the only night that's free for me and so far, it had been so uneventful, so you'll have to make up for it! Just...anything except doing a pointless chase around the city, that's boring!"

The Bear smiled under her mask. Apparently she could listen to reason. She held her phone up and waved it at the time manipulator. "I got something for you, then. Apparently this shitty company called Superior Industries, the folks whose van I just tipped, are down to some shady shit. You interested in coming along? We can meet up with Mindseye and grab your phone too."

She brought the phone down and texted back, Not necessary. Might have a new partner here. She just wants to kill time. If you wanna bring down some crooked corp, I'm fuckin in. Where can we find you?

Museum

Corvid groaned as the pigeon dropped to the ground. He didn't really care that much about the birds - an occupational hazard, he surmised - but being telepathically connected to something as it died stung badly and that cut out his extra angle. He grabbed a Nazi's gun and smashed him over the head with it before wing-bashing him into the wall right next the previous one.

At this point, the Conductor entered the room and the train started flying. Both of these were probably issues. The grey man seemed to have been confronted by the Conductor, who had made some questionable vehicle choices, so he turned to the train. There seemed to be some bullets left in his stolen firearm, so he took some shots at the base of the train, hoping something was breakable. He then threw the empty weapon aside and started flying after it, trying to speed up and approach the driving compartment.

edited 17th Jul '16 1:56:06 AM by FerrousMaelstom

Outside the Museum

The train was difficult to drive - pilot? - at first, but Freezerburn got the hang of it relatively quickly. Certainly quickly enough that he was able to turn it around while the museum was still right behind him. The same song still blaring - and with the first starting to fade, Freezerburn brought the large 'magical' locomotive around in a giant turn. It was as much a matter of aiming as it was not being sure just what the thing could do and not wanting to push it too hard. Yet.

Aiming for the police barricade that had lined up out front of the museum, Freezerburn pulled on the horn line.

HOO-HOOOOO! the vehicle blared as he flew on forwards, giving clear warning about where he was going.

Cops scrambled as they realized what was going on, focused on getting out of the way of the runaway train.

HOO-HOOOOO! it blared again, just before impact.

There was a mild bump inside the train as it hit the first of the now- abandoned police cars. The impact was far more noticeable on the outside. The front wedge leading the way and protecting the vehicle from the brunt of the damage, the law enforcement vehicles were thrown every which way as the train of Nazi Super Science Sneering plowed on through them.

"WOOOOO!" Freezerburn shouted in excitement. For good measure, he also fired a round of 'I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-Magic!' cannonballs around, hitting two statues that were arranged outside the museum that were knocked back and fell over, a tree that splintered apart as it exploded in a woody mass, and a fire hydrant that flew across the street and got lodged into the wall of a building across the street as water began bursting out into the sky.

"Wow!" Freezerburn said, having quickly been impressed by the crazy old vehicle's destructive capacity. "And to think I was going to destroy you!"

No, this vehicle, whatever it was or wherever it had come from - it was a keeper.

Not interested in testing his luck, Freezerburn accelerated the train as he began to plow onward away from the museum, looking to see just what else it was capable of.

Museum

"Ah, a vigilante come to get between me and my rightful property...? Very well!!! I SHALL CREMATE YOU IN A CRACKLING CACOPHON- wait, I recognize that soun- Oof!"

As Simon tackled the "Nazi" villain, electricity coursed through his body from the contact. Thankfully his asbestos form felt no pain or he would have been shocked unconscious. Unfortunately, the discharge triggered his adaptation powers again, and he felt himself begin to change.

Before the transformation was finished, however, the War-Train came roaring over their heads. WHAT THE?? he thought in surprise. He watched as the machine took to the sky, and soon spotted the bird-guy going after it. Well since Simon couldn't fly, stopping the thing was out of his hands, so he hoped the avian hero could do something.

His priority now switched back to the Nazis inside the museum; he had to make sure they didn't hurt anyone. Hopefully none were left conscious, but just in case he'd better check.

(As a matter of fact, there was one Neo-Nazi left; seeing his chance when Corvus took off; he ran away, but avoided the main entrance. Unknown to him, he was heading for the museum wing The Comet was currently in.)

Simon looked at his body; it was now black- and rubbery. Ah, insulated. Well, lightning *is* part of the environment he deduced.

"You bumbling baboon! YOU'VE LET SOMEONE CLAIM MY RIGHTFULLY STOLEN MASTERPIECE!" The Conductor screamed right on his face, who then slung the segway at the hero. BO-INGG!! it bounced right off his rubber-like body.

Simon gave him an annoyed look. He was about to slug the old guy, but wondered if it might hurt him- he looked really frail.

Ehh, he's a dangerous Nazi criminal he reminded himself. Besides, his rubbery body probably would cushion the blow.

-*SLUG!*

Sander's Office

"Oh no no, Miss Cobbler!" Sanders replied. "I assure you, the event will be quite safe. All the money collected will be elsewhere- aren't online donations wonderful?- and the more heroes present, the less likely someone would be to attack, don't you think? It will be just a symbolic act, good for the whole family!''

edited 17th Jul '16 6:21:52 AM by Sijo