"I'm not going to lie to you. I'm not going to exhort you to great acts of heroism, nor to courage, honor, or valor. That type of speech looks good in hindsight, but it's got less truth than a Jedi lecture."
"This is our home, here. New Brethrezen. If this place falls, the Union dies. Grim, I know, but that's just how it is."
"Some of you might feel fear, knowing the battle is coming to our doorstep. There's no shame in that. Everyone experiences fear, those who say they don't are either liars, or have no sense of self-preservation. The former get by fine, the latter get themselves killed in the first few minutes of combat, because they got an unfavorable trait that nature didn't want passed on! Fear is part of us, an animal instinct we relied upon to survive when our species were mere animals!."
"We do not need heroes, right now. No matter what the holovids say, no matter what your mother and father told you, no matter what you've been brought up to believe, no man ever won a war by dieing for his cause! The spoils go to the victors! Any 'noble sacrifice' you make will. be. utterly. forgotten! A 'glorious victory,' on the other hand, will not!"
"You are not beautiful, unique snowflakes! You are not special, exceptional, or one-of-a-kind! You are not invincible! If you get shot, you will die! So stay behind cover, hit the enemy when they're vulnerable, and kill any opposing SOB dumb enough not to do the same! Do not fight 'neat and tidy'! Fight dirty, and fight to win! If your enemy drops his weapon, don't wait for him to pick it up, shoot him for his clumsiness! If he waits for you to pick yours up, thank him with a blasterbolt to the face! We are not gentlemen! We are beasts, and we have been backed into a corner!"
"The truth of the matter is, it's the soldiers who do all the work! It was the Storm Troopers, not Darth Vader or the Emperor, that stormed the rebel bases! It was the Clones who held back the droid army on Kashyyyk! And today, in the Industrial quarter of New Brethrezen, it's going to be you, men, not Lord Reaver, not Lord Lucifer, and sure as hell not Darth Drakonis, that holds the line!"
"Each one of you has a job to do! You might not like that job, but it's yours to do! And by the Force, if anyone every tells you your job is unimportant from this day forth, no matter what it is, I want you to smack them right in that smug mouth of theirs! Every man is a pillar in this temple! If one breaks, the whole thing comes crashing down! One man could say 'I don't like the sound of those shells overhead,' turn tail, and run. Fine. But what if everyone thought like that? Where would the union be if every soldier caught sight of the first blasterbolt, turned chicken-shit, and ran?! No, Goddamnit, that is not how we handle threats in the Union!"
"There will not be many positives from this, battle. There will be many lives lost, and much damage done! But when your body is old, and you're sitting with your grandchild on your knee, and they look up at you with your daughter's eyes and ask, 'What did you do during the battle of New Brethrezen?' you won't have to cough, shift them to the other knee and say, 'Well, I was chewing spice in a cantina on Tatooine.' When they ask you, you can look them right in the eye and say, "Child, I fought with the Great Sixth Division. We were assigned to protect the Industrial Quarter, and we stood for at least two hours, listening to some long-winded Trandoshan bastard named Darth Drakonis give a speech about animal instinct. And then, when he was through, we knew we were going fight hard so that scaly son of a bitch wouldn't give us another one! So, when the battle finally came, we fought, and we fought so hard, we blasted their asses clear out of Union Space!"
Darth Drakonis, giving the longest speech in the history of New Bethrezen.
Darth Xyrafus:" *trollface* u mad bro?"
Darth Ares:"Yes sir, I am mad. But in the morning I shall be calm, and you shall still be an idiot."
Out of character chatbox, regarding Xyr throwing Ares into a crowd to force him to bodysurf.
Darth Ares: "I'm surprised, Pellaeon. I've always thought I was the only Commander around who didn't hate his enemies."
Gilad Pellaeon: "Hatred is counter-productive."
"If you want to pursue a petty feud that should have ended long ago, then I'll make you drown in your ideals and die."
Darth Exolus.
Darth Exolus: "You know, I could take something small but ridiculously tough for a replacement ship. It never occurred to me."
Darth Xyrafus: "Of course not, you're a lord, you think an Eclipse is the smallest ship you can get."
That brings to mind a new saying, "When the going gets tough Ares loses consciousness."
Darth Xaos, out of character chatbox.
"Brethren, hear me! The chains of the grave cannot hold a Dark Lord of the Sith, not when all the forces of the Dark Side demand that I speak! Since the most ancient days always has there been one to carry the title of Dark Lord. Only when led by a singular, powerful will can the Sith be united. The grandest of our acts have all been orchestrated by the Dark Lord of those days. It was through this sacred quality of a Dark Lord's will that Exar Kun freely entered the Republic Senate and departed over the corpse of his former Jedi Master. The will of a Dark Lord brought the Jedi to near extinction under the reign of Darth Traya. Through the careful application of will, Darth Plagueis the Wise and his Apprentice, Sidious, brought the vaunted Republic to its knees and made of the Jedi a near-extinguished object of ridicule."
"Yet there is one thing that may bring low a Dark Lord: betrayl. Revan's conquests were undone by the dull-eyed recklessness of Malak. Great Exar Kun was brought low by Ulic Qel-Droma's loss of resolve. Darth Ruin's empire shattered under his Apprentice's ravenous teeth. It is the destiny of the Sith to rule the Galaxy. The Jedi long ago lost the confidence of the Force in their timidity but, know, that the Force will not accept anything less than perfect attunement to its designs. It will not permit the Sith our destiny if we are not truly united. All of you, by your own free will, became a part of the Grand Design when you swore allegiance to the Code of Brotherhood. The Dark Side tests all Sith. It moves ambition in our hearts, not solely to propel us to glory, but to inquisit after our loyalties as well."
"My death was that call for you, my bretheren. Without my power to guide you, there's was then a choice between loyalty and disloyalty. You succeded in your tribulations and have grown stronger from them, for that is the way of the Sith. With your unity you bow to the will of the Force and, in so doing, become more able to make the Force bow to yours. Even as the Jedi seek to bring about our extinction, we now secure the future when the Sith will take their revenge! But even the most devout of Sith do not comprise a true Sith Order if they lack a Dark Lord to unify them. There can be no empty seat if we are to triumph. The voices of the Dark Side Spirits have spoken; know that only the consent of Chaos' Princes may empower a legitimate Dark Lord! Let now the heavens make a declaration of the departed Dark Lords' election!
"Darth Lucifer, from the earliest days of my struggle you have been by my side. You have slain countless enemies of the Sith and have shown neither remorse nor hesitation in the pursuit of the Grand Design. You have seen Sith turn upon Sith many times. You know the ways of loyalty and treason, can percieve their tendrils where others are blind. With the blood of our foes, with your endless devotion and with your mighty power you have secured this right. I proclaim you the sole and unchallenged Dark Lord of the Sith! Let any who defy the righteousness of this proclaimation tremble before Chaos' Gates for they will know no mercy therein! Choose your course wisely, Brother Lucifer, and fight the correct battles...or else all is lost."
Darth Xaos' Force Ghost at his funeral, anointing Lucifer the Dark Lord and taking second place for longest speech on the site.
"I revel in my lack class and intelligence. Doing so helps me troll everyone equally."
Darth Xyrafus, in the out of character Chatbox
Darth Ares: And then I'll find some excuse to nuke the Khar Delba shipyards just to make life difficult for [Exolus].
Darth Xaos: LMAO That'd piss Luc off but you wouldn't be doing much damage to his ship production. Even a fraction of what Lianna and Dac can pump out dwarfs the Khar shipyards. Actually what you'd probably wind up doing is causing general economic collapse for the Khar system.
Darth Ares: I'm okay with that to piss off Luc and Exolus. It's not about reducing the Union's starship production capacity. It's about sending a message.
Darth Xaos: And would Ares be willing to impoverish total innocents to send a message?
Darth Ares: If it annoys Ex and Luc? I'll nuke Coruscant.
Speaking out of character.
Darth Exolus: "Which do you find more exhilarating? The pain, or the fear? Personally, I prefer fear."
Thing is, Vanno has it figured out... he's been so crazy that we've all decided we have to adapt to his insanity. That means he gets what he wants in most situations because we're too busy groaning at the psychotic antics to decide "no, that's not realistic, you fail."
He has weaponized his insanity. Same with Xyr.
If one of us tried to burst into a room through a window in nothing but a diaper, brandishing hamsters like they were guns and with a pair of hedgehogs tied together like nunchucks to stop an assassination, only to stop in the middle of what we were doing to eat the assassin's lunch, we'd end up getting shot and failing the mission.
Vanno?
"Sure, whatever."
Drakonis to Lucifer, out of character, on the subject of Vanno's insanity.
