Quotes / Adaptational Sexuality

Superman: Hi. I'm Superman. Faster than a locomotive, can leap tall buildings in a single bound, and... bisexual now.
Everyone: Hi, "Bisexual" Superman.
Superman: (emotionally) They just forced it on me! Didn't ask or nothing! I've been straight my whole life! But then, "Nope. No. Not anymore." What happened to respecting someone for who they are?!
Group Leader: We do respect who you are. You just no longer have a say in the matter.
Superman: It's Lois and Clark, not Lewis and Clark! (whimpers)
Group Leader: Well, you're bisexual. So technically, it can be both!

— Babylon Bee, The Fictional Characters Forced To Change Their Identities Support Group