Funny / Zorro, the Gay Blade

• Diego is in bed with a beautiful woman.
  Veronica: Tell me the truth. Do you think I'm a good wife?
  Don Diego: Veronica… you are more exciting than Venus herself.
  Veronica: Then why doesn't my husband ever say that?
  Don Diego: Because he's not intelligent. He is not intuitive. He is not insightful.
  Don Garcia (entering the room): And he is not in Barcelona!
  Don Diego: Don Garcia, I am astonished you would enter my house without my permission!
  Don Garcia: I might say the same thing about you with my wife!

• Florinda converses with the mysterious man in black.
  Florinda: You know, as the Alcalde's wife, I must play many, many, many roles, but the people only see the part I play in public. Only a few select friends know my private parts.