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BadficFetish2010-12-13 22:36:41

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The Goffik Carnival is Buldozed (almost)!

Chapter 3: The Grate Fite

Hoo boy, This fic isn't getting better. Dracola (which, if we're following My Immortal canon, is Neville Longbottom after Character Derailment) goes to get a coca cola but is ambushed by a grate zombie goast headcrab zombie which descended from above due to its gravity causing it to fall down, because gravity makes things fall down. Captain Obvious much? To avoid him, Dracola does that trick where he went backwards by his hands and feet one after the other after the other.

The "zombie goast zombie" gets fustrated and talks about wanting to kill.

Then... Outside, Mc Gonagall and her son Donagall were walking. Donagall asked, "Can I goes to Hogwartz?"

No, you will be a Designated Villain because you don't wear Hot Topic and don't worship Bad Santa.

Mc Gonagall snaped (She turned to Snape), "NO! YOU WILL BE KILLED BY DEMONS!"

Because you don't worship Bad Santa!

And then Donagall got a wepon and killed the demon.

See mum, I can take care of myself just fine!

Meanwhile, Dracola and Linda are busy having sex in Hogwart's time of need. Outside, Harry/Vampire Potter is busy figthing a buldozer and they are doing nothing to help. How like them.

Then Harry danubed a while away to avoid being attakked. And then the Bulldozer was a Zombie Goast.

Mc Gonagall and Donagall shouted, "harry, you must rock the fuck out!" And then Harry grabbed a rocking guitar and shouted, "rock rock rock rock rock rock rock rock the rock!"

Rocks fell and everyone died, allowing the ''real'' Hogwarts characters to escape the Sue's prison.

Jack Chicken screamed, he hated on rock a lot and then he exploded. If he's meant to be Jack Chick, then the author has finally done something awesome except for this parody. Because Chuck Norris. Fine then.

The Buldozer get's destroyed and then headcrab zombies attack. Donagall makes a Heroic Sacrifice, screaming, "Zombie goasts, leave this place!"

Then someone named jimm attacks, but is blown up along with Dallas. Vampire screams.

Menwhile, Godot Frenchman was studying in his was studying laboratoried. Vampire ate Blood Bananas, but these were blood bananas made of blood. This is important how?

And then Nazis. And Hitler became a super saiyan. He attacked as well. By the end of the day, everyone had fought, and somehow, Hogwarts had survived to make it too...

Yawn, who cares about this fake Hogwarts anyway?

((OOC: Finished! I hope I was funny.))

((Recent OOC: Added the word "don't" before the phrase "wear Hot topic and don't worship Bad Santa.))

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