History Recap / GleeS3E11Michael

Welcome to the first of three tribute episodes this season, the first being the long overdue tribute to Music/MichaelJackson, the first such tribute to a deceased artist. Tied into this is the [[AnAesop Aesop]] of taking the high road and moving on to your future. Santana and Quinn helpfully tell us this, actively demonstrating it by not damaging all the men they encounter.

* ''Never Can Say Goodbye'' by the Jackson 5, performed by Quinn

* NotImportantToThisEpisodeCamp: Neither Sue, Emma, Beiste or Sugar appear in this episode.

We start with Klaine and the ex-Troubletones lamenting about how they lost due to pervy clown Tickles. Well, that and the fact New Directions had Michael. Mercedes dismisses an offer to go see Cirque de Soleil's tribute show ''Immortal'', quoting the above; this pings the Hairgel radar, and he swoops in to suggest a repeat for Regionals. Blaine then declares a "Michael Week", as such the gay couples start singing and dancing in the hallways because if someone's going to it may as well be the stereotypical ones. ND look like they "Wanna Be Starting Something", as they dance through the hallway, and the library, ending up in the auditorium, where everyone's outfits are based off of Michael Jackson ones except Finn's, who's in his football jersey, and perhaps Lucy's, who's added epaulets from the "Bad" era to her jumper. This is high energy and good to set the tone as we hit the TitleCard.

Unfortunately, we go from one extreme to another, as we then see Finn approach Rachel; seems the events of the last episode happened in-universe three days prior, which in Finnegan's eyes is plenty of time for his girlfriend to make a life-changing decision. Rachel realizes this, and asks him for some more time. We know you don't like giving girls choices, Finn, but can you remove yourself from her locker before she passes out and wakes up in Quinn's arms? In any event, when asked why the sudden proposal, Finn essentially says what we've already established, that with not being recruited for college football, plus finding out his father had feet of clay, Finn wants to hold on to the one thing he's got left. Rachel says the whole thing is crazy and it so very much is; this, it needs to be reiterated, is the underlying theme between these two this season: That they're essentially destined to drift apart, but cling to each other as long as they can. Anyway, Rachel gets more time as we cut to the Lima Bean where Rachel, Artie, Santana, and Klaine are discussing their favorite Michael memories. Artie claims his first words were watching the moonwalk, and Kurt says that he was actually the first person to pull off a sequinned jacket. Rachel has no connection with his music because he's not Barbra. Or Sondheim. Or Schwartz. Kinda explains a few things. Anyway, because Klaine and Santana are at the Lima Bean, we all know that this is basically smoke signals to Meerkat Mansion and, right on cue, there he appears quick as a [[IncrediblyLamePun flash]] because he might as well live at the Lima Bean. And again, if you only know Creator/GrantGustin as [[Series/TheFlash2014 Barry Allen]], prepare to be stunned. In any case, Sebastian's been listening in and warns them not to do Michael, because the Warblers are doing Michael ([[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WF1s1LGirIE here's proof]]). How many times do people [[TitleDrop say Michael]] in this episode? Too many to count. Snixx wants to go for pummeling, but the meerkat smirks and says that he's become captain of the Warblers, plays the "dad in high office" card, and thus she's got to play nice. Patronizing, bitchy, demeaning, or misogynistic? Or some gleeful combination of them all?

We'll find out in due course as we cut to the choir room, where understandably ND is less than pleased, Puck even wanting Blaine out because he's the guy that stays up having girly chats with meerkat and spilling all their secrets, "like a modern day Eggs Benedict". Yep, turns out that he and Seb still have regular communications, and in the midst of one, Blaine inadvertently spilled the beans causing Seb to change the Warblers' set list. Finn decides to put on his leader pants and rally the troops, this brings in Will to ask What Would MJ Do? Blaine says he'd take it to the streets, which is such a smart idea, good boy, well done. We then cut to some parking lot, where the Warblers stand in formation. They are confronted by Blainetana; Meerkat thinks he can easily take them, but since this is clearly a lopsided battle, we cue the reinforcements, in all black (except Brittany) and all leather (except Rachel). This leads to some "Bad" music, however we soon see how bad it can get. In the midst of the "fight", Sebastian produces a Big Quench; at the final note, he throws it at Kurt, because he has a crush on Blaine and would hurt Kurt to get him, but Blaine loves Kurt and takes the bullet. Thing is, slushies usually just stain and produce a mild sting. We soon this is not an ordinary slushy as Blaine lands really badly on the floor, and his eye is also really hurt. The red dye on the ground followed by the camera as we go to break looks like he's cracked his head open and is bleeding. Wonderful imagery, Glee.

We return to a understandably petrified Kurt, who tells the rest of ND Blaine's got a scratched right cornea and requires surgery. The guys think meerkat added something to the slushy because a normal slushy wouldn't need eye surgery. The cops are brought up, as is precedence that proof is required. Therefore, Will had to go the more benign route, he and Figgins talking to Dalton's headmaster which we know will do nothing. Will says to let the system handle it and that is apparently all that Artie can handle, as he rightfully says Dalton protects their own, then unloads on how they "sing and only sing", the definition of BeingGoodSucks. And as this is a show where verbal declarations are followed by vocal declarations, for the second of three occasions, Creator/KevinMcHale rises from the chair, Artie and Mike kicking it (in [[AttractiveBentGender hot black eyeliner]]) as the pair remake "Scream". Remember the dancing in it? Afterwards, returning to both reality and the choir room, Artie angrily wheels away.

And now, A FABERRY SCENE! Quinn is in the bathroom when the love of her life arrives. Rachel wants help with an "adult" problem and poor Lucy nearly has a conniption fit as she assumes Hudson finally solved his "mailman" problem and... and... nope. Can't fathom it. Poor Q looks more petrified asking if Rachel's pregnant than she did when ''she'' was pregnant. No, Rachel wants advice on marriage... to Quinn? Elaborate, dear, before Lucy says yes and this gets awesome. Sadly, Rachel does say Finn popped the question and you can see the absolute disbelief in her face at both this news and the fact Finn got the alleged balls to ask. When Rachel says she needs time to think about it, Quinn firmly, simply, and correctly says that she can't marry Finn. Rachel goes for the token reasons, only for Q to take out an early admission for Yale, saying that by winter, when she's in New Haven, she won't remember why she wanted to date the boys she has done, and so if Rachel spends time living her life without Finn she'll have a better perspective on whether she really wants to drag him along strapped to her coattails. Something about anchors and the bright lights of her future: oh, yeah, he's not going to do anything and will try to stop Rachel from being successful, as he's already tried, because he's a selfish little bitchy pig. Sorry, pigs of the world. Bottom line is Rachel's life is destined to be amazing, but if she wants everything she's ever dreamed of, she's gonna have to break up with him. Quinn, as always when it comes to the girl she loves, is ahead of the curb. As Quinn looks heartbroken as she leaves, we cut to the only solo of the episode, and Dianna's final solo (making it quite appropriately named), "Never Can Say Goodbye". Like with "You Keep Me Hanging On", some fans wonder how Rachel evoked this reaction from Quinn if she's straight. The answer is simple: If anyone but RIB wrote this show, she wouldn't be, and her and Rachel would already be dating. Ballgown (what do you mean she's meant to look like a teenager?) DreamSequence aside, she finishes the performance in the choir room, and everyone is amazed at how good a performer Quinn is (I thought Blaine was the only blind one?) and then more so when Will gets her to tell them all that she's already been given a place at Yale. She thanks the glee kids for helping her see that she, referring to her recent crazy spell, was the one standing in her way and she can't change her past but she can let it go and start her future (pointed looks at Rachel).

Cut to Santana finding Kurt in a classroom, him at the end of his rope with being passive. He's coming up with a list of ways to get revenge. Santana of course goes for the more extreme methods because Snixx loves the pain, only for Kurt to say he has to take the high road. Sigh. Just once, I'd love to see someone in ND stoop to real lows. Anyway, Santana agrees, wanting to go to a college that isn't ghetto or in prison. First of all, [[{{Anvilicious}} LOOK TO YOUR FUTURE!]]; second, [[spoiler: funny she says that, because she'll wind up dropping out of college next season]]. Cut to Mercedes getting a summons to the auditorium, where Trouty has managed to contain his drool long enough to not electrocute himself trying to figure out how to work the light board at the back, changing "MICHAEL" into "MERCEDES" and saying that she should get used to her name in lights. This leads to some "Human Nature, their first duet, which is because she's an amazing singer, many of your recordings more AutoTune than anything, and your voices just don't go together. Sam then swallows Mercedes, and as much as we joke, we can admit that this was a sweet pairing. [[spoiler: Too bad it ultimately doesn't go anywhere, and is randomly revived, for the DorkAge that is Season 5 Episodes 14-20]]. Cut to Spanish class where Papa Burt arrives and takes Kurt out, giving him his [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in). Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because their lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Unfortunately, the fluctuating emotions cause Rachel to think she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), breaking down in Kurt's arms as she decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn.

After the break, we see Creator/DarrenCriss before his stint on Broadway[[note]]To elaborate, Blaine will miss the next episode and most of the following episode due to Darren taking the lead in ''How to Succeed in Business''.[[/note]], in Kurt's bed wearing an eye patch and listening to Kurt read gossip rags. Finchel arrive and bring him films that feature eyepatches in what Finn thinks is sweet but should have probably checked with someone that it might not be considered insensitive first. Finnegan, you're an idiot. Blaine gets serenaded with "Ben" for some reason besides the theme of the episode, Rachel revealing that she always has a pitch pipe on her. CrazyPrepared, she is. Cut to Santana at an impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Creator/NayaRivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a thing as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are [[FoeYay rolling in it]]. Some of the Warblers return with a Big Quench so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He tags her and she looks less than pleased as we go to break.

Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the Warblers' cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their own wanting to prove meerkat had done something wrong from not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her tits, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it. Actually, it'd be two weeks, and somehow be all about Finn. And speaking of Finnept, he keeps Rachel behind, then says that maybe the problem wasn't that he proposed, yes it is, but ''how''. Thus, Enter the Ellis, and the rest of the band as we cue up "I Just Can't Stop Loving You"; afterwards, Finn tries again, not knowing she's already made up her mind, and then gives her the ring. They kiss really sloppily, Finn's sort-of crying, while we're full on crying because WHY?!?!?!?!?!... I mean... way to make life decisions, Rachel, you're an idiot. Now go back to the bathroom and make out with Quinn, then have a "talk" with her before you say anything.

After... that... there is no real home stretch, we instead cut to the Warblers on enemy turf, Artie and Kurt having invited them. They won't perform Michael at Regionals, but ND wanted to show the Warblers how to because they don't get it. We fire up "Black or White"; the performance so infectious this leads to everyone but the meerkat joining in. Afterwards, Santana steps up to tell meerkat that she could have him expelled and arrested. Kurt takes the tape off her and gives it to meerkat, saying that the rest of the Warblers knowing what kind of jerk he is (they already knew?) is enough of a punishment. Let's justify this by saying that these two have had the threat of suspension put on them, and have given meerkat that scare but wouldn't wish actual suspension on him? RealityIsUnrealistic. Speaking of, there is one regrettable thread to tie up for the week as we end the first half of Season 3. We cut to Rachel at Kurt's locker. She has her letter from [=NYADA=] (duh), and is a finalist (big duh), so is she maybe regretting her decision to marry Finn? BIGGEST DUH. Unfortunately, as we'll see in a few episodes time, this "engagement" will play an abstract role in a major tragedy involving the woman who'd do anything for her. RACHEL! Listen to Lucy! And then kiss her!

* NotImportantToThisEpisodeCamp: Neither the Counselor, the Beiste, the Tracksuit, nor the Time Traveler appear. Seems Sugar either took time off to help Brittany on the time machine, or she never liked MJ.

After... that... there is no real home stretch, we instead cut to the Warblers on enemy turf, Artie and Kurt having invited them. They won't perform Michael at Regionals, but ND wanted to show the Warblers how to because they don't get it. We fire up the "Black and White"; the performance so infectious this leads to everyone but the meerkat joining in. Afterwards, Santana steps up to tell meerkat that she could have him expelled and arrested. Kurt takes the tape off her and gives it to meerkat, saying that the rest of the Warblers knowing what kind of jerk he is (they already knew?) is enough of a punishment. Let's justify this by saying that these two have had the threat of suspension put on them, and have given meerkat that scare but wouldn't wish actual suspension on him? RealityIsUnrealistic. Speaking of, there is one regrettable thread to tie up for the week as we end the first half of Season 3. We cut to Rachel at Kurt's locker. She has her letter from [=NYADA=] (duh), and is a finalist (big duh), so is she maybe regretting her decision to marry Finn? BIGGEST DUH. Unfortunately, as we'll see in a few episodes time, this "engagement" will play an abstract role in a major tragedy involving the woman who'd do anything for her. RACHEL! Listen to Lucy! And then kiss her!

* MoonwalkDance: [[MeaningfulName Mike]] pulls it off and Blaine gives it a very good go.

Unfortunately, we go from one extreme to another, as we then see Finn approach Rachel; seems the events of the last episode happened in-universe three days prior, which in Finnegan's eyes is plenty of time for his girlfriend to make a life-changing decision. Rachel realizes this, and asks him for some more time. We know you don't like giving girls choices, Finn, but can you remove yourself from her locker before she passes out and wakes up in Lucille's arms? In any event, when asked why the sudden proposal, Finn essentially says what we've already established, that with not being recruited for college football, plus finding out his father had feet of clay, Finn wants to hold on to the one thing he's got left. Rachel says the whole thing is crazy and it so very much is; this, it needs to be reiterated, is the underlying theme between these two this season: That they're essentially destined to drift apart, but cling to each other as long as they can. Anyway, Rachel gets more time as we cut to the Lima Bean where Rachel, Artie, Santana, and Klaine are discussing their favorite Michael memories. Artie claims his first words were watching the moonwalk, and Kurt says that he was actually the first person to pull off a sequinned jacket. Rachel has no connection with his music because he's not Barbra. Or Sondheim. Or Schwartz. Kinda explains a few things. Anyway, because Klaine and Santana are at the Lima Bean, we all know that this is basically smoke signals to Meerkat Mansion and, right on cue, there he appears quick as a [[IncrediblyLamePun flash]] because he might as well live at the Lima Bean. And again, if you only know Creator/GrantGustin as [[Series/TheFlash2014 Barry Allen]], prepare to be stunned. In any case, Sebastian's been listening in and warns them not to do Michael, because the Warblers are doing Michael ([[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WF1s1LGirIE here's proof]]). How many times do people [[TitleDrop say Michael]] in this episode? Too many to count. Snixx wants to go for pummeling, but the meerkat smirks and says that he's become captain of the Warblers, plays the "dad in high office" card, and thus she's got to play nice. Patronizing, bitchy, demeaning, or misogynistic? Or some gleeful combination of them all?

And now, A FABERRY SCENE! Dear Lucille is in the bathroom when the love of her life arrives. Rachel wants help with an "adult" problem and poor Lucy nearly has a conniption fit as she assumes Hudson finally solved his "mailman" problem and... and... nope. Can't fathom it. Poor Q looks more petrified asking if Rachel's pregnant than she did when ''she'' was pregnant. No, Rachel wants advice on marriage... to Quinn? Elaborate, dear, before Lucy says yes and this gets awesome. Sadly, Rachel does say Finn popped the question and you can see the absolute disbelief in her face at both this news and the fact Finn got the alleged balls to ask. When Rachel says she needs time to think about it, Quinn firmly, simply, and correctly says that she can't marry Finn. Rachel goes for the token reasons, only for Q to take out an early admission for Yale, saying that by winter, when she's in New Haven, she won't remember why she wanted to date the boys she has done, and so if Rachel spends time living her life without Finn she'll have a better perspective on whether she really wants to drag him along strapped to her coattails. Something about anchors and the bright lights of her future: oh, yeah, he's not going to do anything and will try to stop Rachel from being successful, as he's already tried, because he's a selfish little bitchy pig. Sorry, pigs of the world. Bottom line is Rachel's life is destined to be amazing, but if she wants everything she's ever dreamed of, she's gonna have to break up with him. Lucille, as always when it comes to the girl she loves, is ahead of the curb. As Quinn looks heartbroken as she leaves, we cut to the only solo of the episode, and Dianna's final solo (making it quite appropriately named), "Never Can Say Goodbye". Like with "You Keep Me Hanging On", some fans wonder how Rachel evoked this reaction from Quinn if she's straight. The answer is simple: If anyone but RIB wrote this show, she wouldn't be, and her and Rachel would already be dating. Ballgown (what do you mean she's meant to look like a teenager?) DreamSequence aside, she finishes the performance in the choir room, and everyone is amazed at how good a performer Quinn is (I thought Blaine was the only blind one?) and then more so when Will gets her to tell them all that she's already been given a place at Yale. She thanks the glee kids for helping her see that she, referring to her recent crazy spell, was the one standing in her way and she can't change her past but she can let it go and start her future (pointed looks at Rachel).

Cut to Santana finding Kurt in a classroom, him at the end of his rope with being passive. He's coming up with a list of ways to get revenge. Santana of course goes for the more extreme methods because Snixx loves the pain, only for Kurt to say he has to take the high road. Sigh. Just once, I'd love to see someone in ND stoop to real lows. Anyway, Santana agrees, wanting to go to a college that isn't ghetto or in prison. First of all, [[{{Anvilicious}} LOOK TO YOUR FUTURE!]]; second, [[spoiler: funny she says that, because she'll wind up dropping out of college next season]]. Cut to Mercedes getting a summons to the auditorium, where Trouty has managed to contain his drool long enough to not electrocute himself trying to figure out how to work the light board at the back, changing "MICHAEL" into "MERCEDES" and saying that she should get used to her name in lights. This leads to some "Human Nature, their first duet, which is because she's an amazing singer, and you're good, but not great. Sam then swallows Mercedes, and as much as we joke, we can admit that this was a sweet pairing. [[spoiler: Too bad it ultimately doesn't go anywhere, and is revived, but sadly, not ultimate for the DorkAge that is Season 5 Episodes 14-20]]. Cut to Spanish class where Papa Burt arrives and takes Kurt out, giving him his [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in). Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because their lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Unfortunately, the fluctuating emotions cause Rachel to think she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), breaking down in Kurt's arms as she decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn.

After the break, we see Creator/DarrenCriss before his stint on Broadway[[note]]To elaborate, Blaine will miss the next episode and most of the following episode due to Darren taking the lead in ''How to Succeed in Business''.[[/note]], in Kurt's bed wearing an eye patch and listening to Kurt read gossip rags. Finchel arrive and bring him films that feature eyepatches in what Finn thinks is sweet but should have probably checked with someone that it might not be considered insensitive first. Blaine gets serenaded with "Ben" for some reason besides the theme of the episode, Rachel revealing that she always has a pitch pipe on her. CrazyPrepared, she is. Cut to Santana at an impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Creator/NayaRivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a thing as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are [[FoeYay rolling in it]]. Some of the Warblers return with a Big Quench so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He tags her and she looks less than pleased as we go to break.

After the break, we see Creator/DarrenCriss before his stint on Broadway[[note]]To elaborate, Blaine will miss the next episode and most of the following episode due to Darren taking the lead in ''How to Succeed in Business''.[[/note]], in Kurt's bed wearing an eye patch and listening to Kurt read gossip rags. Finchel arrive and bring him films that feature eyepatches in what Finn thinks is sweet but should have probably checked with someone that it might not be considered insensitive first. Finnegan, you're an idiot. Blaine gets serenaded with "Ben" for some reason besides the theme of the episode, Rachel revealing that she always has a pitch pipe on her. CrazyPrepared, she is. Cut to Santana at an impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Creator/NayaRivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a thing as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are [[FoeYay rolling in it]]. Some of the Warblers return with a Big Quench so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He tags her and she looks less than pleased as we go to break.

Cut to Santana finding Kurt in a classroom, him at the end of his rope with being passive. He's coming up with a list of ways to get revenge. Santana of course goes for the more extreme methods because Snixx loves the pain, only for Kurt to say he has to take the high road. Sigh. Just once, I'd love to see someone in ND stoop to real lows. Anyway, Santana agrees, wanting to go to a college that isn't ghetto or in prison. First of all, [[{{Anvilicious}} LOOK TO YOUR FUTURE!]]; second, [[spoiler: funny she says that, because she'll wind up dropping out of college next season]]. Cut to Mercedes getting a summons to the auditorium, where Trouty has managed to contain his drool long enough to not electrocute himself trying to figure out how to work the light board at the back, changing "MICHAEL" into "MERCEDES" and saying that she should get used to her name in lights. This leads to some "Human Nature, their first duet, which is because she's an amazing singer, many of your recordings more AutoTune than anything, and your voices just don't go together. Sam then swallows Mercedes, and as much as we joke, we can admit that this was a sweet pairing. [[spoiler: Too bad it ultimately doesn't go anywhere, and is randomly revived for the DorkAge that is Season 5 Episodes 14-20]]. Cut to Spanish class where Papa Burt arrives and takes Kurt out, giving him his [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in). Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because their lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Unfortunately, the fluctuating emotions cause Rachel to think she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), breaking down in Kurt's arms as she decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn.

* DawsonCasting: Whilst the kids are mostly passable, DiannaAgron putting on an elegant ball gown with her hair up for "Never Can Say Goodbye" makes it very clear that she was out of high school a while ago.

After... that... there is no real home stretch, we instead cut to the Warblers on enemy turf, Artie and Kurt having invited them. They won't perform Michael at Regionals, but ND wanted to show the Warblers how to because they don't get it. We fire up the "Black and White"; the performance so infectious this leads to everyone but the meerkat joining in. Afterwards, Santana steps up to tell meerkat that she could have him expelled and arrested. Kurt takes the tape off her and gives it to meerkat, saying that the rest of the Warblers knowing what kind of jerk he is (they already knew?) is enough of a punishment. Let's justify this by saying that these two have had the threat of suspension put on them, and have given meerkat that scare but wouldn't wish actual suspension on him? RealityIsUnrealistic. Speaking of, there is one regrettable thread to tie up for the week, as we cut to Rachel at Kurt's locker. She has her letter from [=NYADA=] (duh), and is a finalist (big duh), so is she maybe regretting her decision to marry Finn? BIGGEST DUH. Unfortunately, as we'll see in a few episodes time, this "engagement" will play an abstract role in a major tragedy involving the woman who'd do anything for her. RACHEL! Listen to Lucy! And then kiss her!

This is the tribute to Music/MichaelJackson, long overdue, and the first such glee episode for a deceased artist. The [[AnAesop Aesop]] of today's lesson, though, is to take the high road and move on to your future. Santana and Quinn helpfully tell us this, actively demonstrating it by not damaging all the men they encounter.

We start with Klaine and the ex-Troubletones lamenting about how they lost due to pervy clown Tickles. Well, that and the fact New Directions had Michael. Mercedes dismisses an offer to go see Cirque de Soleil's tribute show ''Immortal'', quoting the above; this pings the Hairgel radar, and he swoops in to suggest a repeat for Regionals. Blaine then declares a "Michael Week", as such the gay couples start singing and dancing in the hallways because if someone's going to it may as well be the stereotypical ones. ND look like they "Wanna Be Starting Something", as they dance through the hallway, and the library, ending up in the auditorium, where everyone's outfits are based off of Michael Jackson ones except Finn's, who's in his football jersey, and perhaps Lucy's, who's added epaulettes from the "Bad" era to her jumper. This is high energy and good to set the tone as we hit the TitleCard.

Finn wants to know if Rachel's going to agree to marry him already, and she asks him for some more time to make a decision. We know you don't like giving girls choices, Finn, but can you remove yourself from her locker before she passes out and wakes up in Lucille's arms?

Artie and Rachel have been dragged to the Lima Bean with Klaine and Santana, and they're discussing their favorite Michael memories. Artie claims his first words were watching the moonwalk, and Kurt says that he was actually the first person to pull off a sequinned jacket. Rachel has no connection with his music because he's not called Stephen. Now, because Klaine and Santana are at the Lima Bean, we all know that this is basically smoke signals to Meerkat Mansion and, right on cue, there he appears quick as a [[IncrediblyLamePun flash]] because he might as well live in the Dalton coffee hangout. He's been listening in and warns them not to do Michael, because the Warblers are doing Michael (insert the song that got cut). How many times do people [[TitleDrop say Michael]] in this episode? Too many to count. Snixx wants to yell at him, but meerkat smirks and says that somehow he's become captain of the Warblers and she's got to play nice. Patronizing, bitchy, demeaning, or misogynistic? Or some gleeful combination of them all?

The glee kids aren't happy with the news, and Puck wants Blaine out because he's the guy that stays up having girly chats with meerkat and spilling all their secrets, "like a modern day Eggs Benedict". Will asks them What Would MJ Do? Blaine says he'd take it to the streets, which is such a smart idea, good boy, well done. Santana and Blaine arrive at some parking lot and meerkat brings the Warblers. They are soon flanked by Artie, Quinn, and Puck in black leather. Meerkat thinks he can easily take them, but the five say that they've brought reinforcements. Cue the rest of New Directions, in all black (except Brittany) and all leather (except Rachel). This is for a sing-off, but meerkat makes it dirty by throwing a slushy at Kurt, because he has a crush on Blaine and would hurt Kurt to get him, but Blaine loves Kurt and takes the bullet. He lands really badly on the floor, and his eye is also really hurt. The red slushy dye on the floor followed by the camera as it cuts to commercial looks like he's cracked his head open and is bleeding. Wonderful imagery, Glee.

The guys think meerkat added something to the slushy because a normal slushy wouldn't need eye surgery. Will says it was stupid of them to go outside and sing, and he's talked to the principal of Dalton about the Warblers. Which is not going to help, at all. Artie's not happy that they "sing and only sing", so in an ImagineSpot he gets up from his wheelchair, with Mike following him kicking it (in [[AttractiveBentGender hot black eyeliner]]), and the pair remake "Scream". Remember the dancing in it? Yeah, it's a shame Creator/KevinMcHale only got three chances to show off his moves. Returning to the choir room, Artie angrily wheels away.

Rachel goes to meet Quinn in the bathroom. She asks for help with an adult problem, and Quinn looks more petrified asking if Rachel's pregnant than she did when ''she'' was pregnant. No, Rachel wants advice on marriage... to Quinn? Elaborate, dear, before Lucy says yes and this gets awesome. The situation explained, Quinn firmly and simply says that she can't marry Finn ("you can't marry ''Finn'', Rachel", chuckling around the oaf's name). She then takes out her Yale early admission and says that by winter, when she's in New Haven, she won't remember why she wanted to date the boys she has done, and so if Rachel spends time living her life without Finn she'll have a better perspective on whether she really wants to drag him along strapped to her coattails. Something about anchors and the bright lights of her future: oh, yeah, he's not going to do anything and will try to stop Rachel from being successful, as he's already tried, because he's a selfish little bitchy pig. Sorry, pigs of the world. Quinn tells Rachel that her life is great and she can not only get everything she wants without having Finn, but she may not have the opportunities if she has Finn. Didn't she say all this before? They hug, Rachel thanking her for her honest opinion, and Quinn looks heartbroken in her close-up. Cut to the only solo of the episode, and Dianna's final solo (making it quite appropriately named), "Never Can Say Goodbye". Like with "You Keep Me Hanging On", some fans wonder how Rachel evoked this reaction from Quinn if she's straight. The answer is simple: If anyone but RIB wrote this show, she wouldn't be, and her and Rachel would already be dating.

Ballgown (what do you mean she's meant to look like a teenager?) DreamSequence aside, she finishes the performance in the choir room, and everyone is amazed at how good a performer Quinn is (I thought Blaine was the only blind one?) and then more so when Will gets her to tell them all that she's already been given a place at Yale. She thanks the glee kids for helping her see that she was the one standing in her way and she can't change her past but she can let it go and start her future (pointed looks at Rachel).

Santana and Kurt agree they want to beat meerkat, but can't hurt him. They're going to grow up and take the high road ("which I was shocked to learn has nothing to do with marijuana") because Santana wants to go to a college that isn't ghetto or in prison. [[{{Anvilicious}} LOOK TO YOUR FUTURE!]]

Sam and Mercedes meet in the auditorium, and Trouty has managed to contain his drool long enough to not electrocute himself trying to figure out how to work the light board at the back, changing "MICHAEL" into "MERCEDES" before having a duet with her because they've never duetted before. That would be because she's an amazing singer, many of your recordings more AutoTune than anything, and your voices just don't go together. Sam kisses Mercedes.

Burt takes Kurt out of Will's Spanish class, and gives him his [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in). Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because their lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Thinking she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), Rachel decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn so needs to marry him. Way to make life decisions, go back to the bathroom and [[strike: make out with]] have a "talk" with [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in). Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because their lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Thinking she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), Rachel decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn so needs to marry him. Way to make life decisions, go back to the bathroom and make out with Quinn, then have a "talk" with her before you say anything.

DarrenCriss has some more time before his stint on Broadway and can now be Blaine, wearing an eye patch and singing with Kurt. Finn and Rachel bring him films that feature eyepatches in what Finn thinks is sweet but should have probably checked with someone that it might not be considered insensitive first. Finnegan, you're a moron. Blaine gets serenaded with "Ben" for some reason, Rachel revealing that she always has a [[CrazyPrepared pitch pipe]] on her.

Santana goes to some impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Creator/NayaRivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show has produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a thing as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are [[FoeYay rolling in it]]. Some of the Warblers return with a slushy so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He slushies her and she looks less than pleased. Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the Warblers' cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their own wanting to prove meerkat had done something wrong from not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her genitals, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something to his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it. Actually, it'd be two weeks, and somehow be all about Finn.

Finn tries some more to make Rachel marry him, not knowing she's already made up her mind, and then gives her the ring. They kiss really sloppily, Finn's sort-of crying, while we're full on crying because WHY?!?!?!?!?!

Artie and Kurt have invited the Warblers to watch them perform Michael. They won't do it at Regionals, but need to show the Warblers how to because they don't get Michael. Everyone but meerkat ends up joining in. After the song, the kids about to leave, Santana steps up to tell meerkat that she could have him expelled and arrested. Kurt takes the tape off her and gives it to meerkat, saying that the rest of the Warblers knowing what kind of jerk he is (they already knew?) is enough of a punishment. Let's justify this by saying that these two have had the threat of suspension put on them, and have given meerkat that scare but wouldn't wish actual suspension on him?

Rachel gets her letter from [=NYADA=] and is a finalist (duh), maybe regretting her decision to marry Finn? Listen to Lucy! And then kiss her! Yes, this is how we end the first half of Season 3. Oi.

Next Time: ¿Qué sucede cuando un personaje es llamado con un rasgo dudoso que ha estado con él desde el comienzo de la serie? Además, vivimos La Vida Loca[[note]]What happens when a character is called out on a dubious trait that has been with him since the start of the series? Plus, we live La Vida Loca.[[/note]].

Rachel gets her letter from [=NYADA=] and is a finalist (duh), maybe regretting her decision to marry Finn? Listen to Lucy! And then kiss her!

[[caption-width-right:350:I want to ''be'' the spectacle that is Michael.]]

The Troubletones are sad that they didn't get to perform Michael songs at Sectionals, so the gay couples start singing and dancing in the hallways because if someone's going to it may as well be the stereotypical ones. This launches into a group performance in the auditorium, where everyone's outfits are based off of Michael Jackson ones except Finn's, who's in his football jersey, and perhaps Quinn's, who's added epaulettes from the "Bad" era to her jumper and is wearing matching combat boots.

Burt takes Kurt out of Will's Spanish class, and gives him his [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in). Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because their lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Thinking she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), Rachel decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn so needs to marry him. Way to make life decisions, go back to the bathroom and [[strike: make out with]] have a "talk" with Quinn before you say anything.

Santana goes to some impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Creator/NayaRivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show has produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a think as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are [[FoeYay rolling in it]]. Some of the Warblers return with a slushy so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He slushies her and she looks less than pleased. Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the Warblers' cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their own wanting to prove meerkat had done something wrong from not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her genitals, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it. Actually, it'd be two weeks, and somehow be all about Finn.

This is the tribute to MichaelJackson, long overdue, and the first such glee episode for a deceased artist. The [[AnAesop Aesop]] of today's lesson, though, is to take the high road and move on to your future. Santana and Quinn helpfully tell us this, actively demonstrating it by not damaging all the men they encounter.

Santana goes to some impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Naya Rivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show has produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a think as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are [[FoeYay rolling in it]]. Some of the Warblers return with a slushy so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He slushies her and she looks less than pleased. Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the Warblers' cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their own wanting to prove meerkat had done something wrong from not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her genitals, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it. Actually, it'd be two weeks, and somehow be all about Finn.

* ActorAllusion: Naya Rivera has performed with 2Cellos often, the "cello guys" she gets to stay for her song with Sebastian.

* ''Bad'' performed by the Warblers and New Directions

DarrenCriss has some more time before his stint on Broadway and can now be Blaine, wearing an eye patch and singing with Kurt. Finn and Rachel bring him films that feature eyepatches in what Finn thinks is sweet but should have probably checked with someone that it might not be considered insensitive first. Finnegan, you're a moron. Blaine gets serenaded with "Ben" for some reason, Rachel revealing that she always has a pitch pipe on her.

Santana goes to some impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Naya Rivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show has produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a think as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are rolling in it. Some of the Warblers return with a slushy so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He slushies her and she looks less than pleased. Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the Warblers' cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their own wanting to prove meerkat had done something wrong from not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her genitals, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it. Actually, it'd be two weeks, and somehow be all about Finn.

The guys think meerkat added something to the slushy because a normal slushy wouldn't need eye surgery. Will says it was stupid of them to go outside and sing, and he's talked to the principal of Dalton about the Warblers. Which is not going to help, at all. Artie's not happy that they "sing and only sing", so in an ImagineSpot he gets up from his wheelchair, with Mike following him kicking it, and the pair remake "Scream". Remember the dancing in it? Yeah, it's a shame Creator/KevinMcHale only got three chances to show off his moves. Returning to the choir room, Artie angrily wheels away.

The glee kids aren't happy with the news, and Puck wants Blaine out because he's the guy that stays up having girly chats with meerkat and spilling all their secrets, "like a modern day Eggs Benedict". Will asks them What Would MJ Do? Blaine says he'd take it to the streets, which is such a smart idea, boy, well done. Santana and Blaine arrive at some parking lot and meerkat brings the Warblers. They are soon flanked by Artie, Quinn, and Puck in black leather. Meerkat thinks he can easily take them, but the five say that they've brought reinforcements. Cue the rest of New Directions, in all black (except Brittany) and all leather (except Rachel). This is for a sing-off, but meerkat makes it dirty by throwing a slushy at Kurt, because he has a crush on Blaine and would hurt Kurt to get him, but Blaine loves Kurt and takes the bullet. He lands really badly on the floor, and his eye is also really hurt. The red slushy dye on the floor followed by the camera as it cuts to commercial looks like he's cracked his head open and is bleeding. Wonderful imagery, Glee.

The guys think meerkat added something to the slushy because a normal slushy wouldn't need eye surgery. Will says it was stupid of them to go outside and sing, and he's talked to the principal of Dalton about the Warblers. Which is not going to help, at all. Artie's not happy that they "sing and only sing", so in an ImagineSpot gets up from his wheelchair, with Mike following him kicking it, and the pair remake "Scream". Remember the dancing in it? Yeah, it's a shame Creator/KevinMcHale only got three chances to show off his moves. Returning to the choir room, Artie angrily wheels away.

Ballgown (what do you mean she's meant to look like a teenager?) DreamSequence aside, she finishes the performance in the choir room, and everyone is amazed at how good a performer Quinn is (I thought Blaine was the only blind one?) and then more so when Will gets her to tell them all that's already been given a place at Yale. She thanks the glee kids for helping her see that she was the one standing in her way and she can't change her past but she can let it go and start her future (pointed looks at Rachel).

Santana and Kurt agree they want to beat meerkat, but can't hurt. They're going to grow up and take the high road ("which I was shocked to learn has nothing to do with marijuana") because Santana wants to go to a college that isn't ghetto or in prison. [[{{Anvilicious}} LOOK TO YOUR FUTURE!]]

Burt takes Kurt out of Will's Spanish class, and gives him his [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in) Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because that lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Thinking she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), Rachel decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn so needs to marry him. Way to make life decisions, go back to the bathroom and [[strike: make out with]] have a "talk" with Quinn before you say anything.

DarrenCriss has some more time before his stint on Broadway and can now be Blaine, wearing an eye patch and singing with Kurt. Finn and Rachel brings films that feature eyepatches in what Finn thinks is sweet but should have probably checked with someone that it might not be considered insensitive first. Finnegan, you're a moron Blaine gets serenaded with "Ben" for some reason, Rachel revealing that she always has a pitch pipe on her.

Santana goes to some impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Naya Rivera's favorite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show has produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a think as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are rolling in it. Some of the Warblers return with a slushy so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He slushies her and she looks less than pleased. Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their wanting to prove meerkat had done something not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her genitals, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it. Actually, it'd be two weeks, and somehow be all about Finn.

Finn wants to know if Rachel's going to agree to marry him already, and she asks him for some more time to make a decision. We know you don't like giving girls choices, Finn, but can you remove yourself from her locker before she stops breathing?

Artie and Rachel have been dragged to the Lima Bean with Klaine and Santana, and they're discussing their favourite Michael memories. Artie claims his first words were watching the moonwalk, and Kurt says that he was actually the first person to pull off a sequinned jacket. Rachel has no connection with his music because he's not called Stephen. Now, because Klaine and Santana are at the Lima Bean, we all know that this is basically smoke signals to Meerkat Mansion and, right on cue, there he appears because he might as well live in the Dalton coffee hangout. He's been listening in and warns them not to do Michael, because the Warblers are doing Michael (insert the song that got cut). How many times do people [[TitleDrop say Michael]] in this episode? Too many to count. Snixx wants to yell at him, but meerkat smirks and says that somehow he's become captain of the Warblers and she's got to play nice. Patronising, bitchy, demeaning, or misogynistic? Or some gleeful combination of them all?

The glee kids aren't happy with the news, and Puck wants Blaine out because he's the guy that stays up having girly chats with meerkat and spilling all their secrets, "like a modern day Eggs Benedict". Will asks them What Would MJ Do? Blaine says he'd take it to the streets, which is such a smart idea, boy, well done. Santana and Blaine arrive at some parking lot and meerkat brings the Warblers. They are soon flanked by Artie, Quinn, and Puck in black leather. Meerkat thinks he can easily take them, but the five say that they've brought reinforcements. Cue the rest of New Directions, in all black (except Brittany) and all leather (except Rachel). This is for a sing-off, but meerkat makes it dirty by throwing a slushy at Kurt, because he has a crush on Blaine and would hurt Kurt to get him, but Blaine loves Kurt and jumps in front of it. He lands really badly on the floor, and his eye is also really hurt. The red slushy dye on the floor followed by the camera as it cuts to commercial looks like he's cracked his head open and is bleeding.

The guys think meerkat added something to the slushy because a normal slushy wouldn't need eye surgery. Will says it was stupid of them to go outside and sing, and he's talked to the principal of Dalton about the Warblers. Which is not going to help, at all. Artie's not happy that they "sing and only sing", so in an ImagineSpot gets up from his wheelchair, with Mike following him kicking it, and the pair remake the music video of "Scream". Remember the dancing in it? Yeah, it's a shame Creator/KevinMcHale only gets few chances to show off his moves. Returning to the choir room, Artie angrily wheels away.

Rachel goes to meet Quinn in the bathroom. She asks for help with an adult problem, and Quinn looks more petrified asking if Rachel's pregnant than she did when ''she'' was pregnant. No, Rachel wants advice on marriage... to Quinn? Elaborate, dear, before Lucy says yes and this gets awkward. The situation explained, Quinn firmly and simply says that she can't marry Finn ("you can't marry ''Finn'', Rachel", chuckling around the oaf's name). She then takes out her Yale early admission and says that by winter, when she's in New Haven, she won't remember why she wanted to date the boys she has done, and so if Rachel spends time living her life without Finn she'll have a better perspective on whether she really wants to drag him along strapped to her coattails. Something about anchors and the bright lights of her future: oh, yeah, he's not going to do anything and will try to stop Rachel from being successful, as he's already tried, because he's a selfish little bitchy pig. Sorry, pigs of the world. Quinn tells Rachel that her life is great and she can not only get everything she wants without having Finn, but she may not have the opportunities if she has Finn. Didn't she say all this before? They hug, Rachel thanking her for her honest opinion, and Quinn looks heartbroken in her close-up. Cut to the only solo of the episode, and Dianna's final solo ever (making it quite appropriately named), "Never Can Say Goodbye". Like with "You Keep Me Hanging On", some fans wonder how Rachel evoked this reaction from Quinn if she's straight.

Sam and Mercedes meet in the auditorium, and Sam has managed to contain his drool long enough to not electrocute himself trying to figure out how to work the light board at the back, changing "MICHAEL" into "MERCEDES" before having a duet with her because they've never duetted before. That would be because she's an amazing singer, many of your recordings more AutoTune than anything, and your voices just don't go together. Sam kisses Mercedes.

Burt takes Kurt out of Will's Spanish class, and gives him his [=NYADA=] letter. They walk from room to room until Kurt decides to settle in the choir room, saying that it's important which room his life changes in. Why he went to the library and gym before either the auditorium or the choir room we'll never know. Even the dumpster and the bathroom are more significant for him (though Rachel's claimed that last one to open her letter in) Kurt opens the letter, and runs to find Rachel because that lesson ended already. He's a finalist, but Rachel hasn't got her letter yet. Thinking she's been rejected already (dear, if Kurt's a finalist then you definitely are), Rachel decides that she literally has Finn and only Finn so needs to marry him. Way to make life decisions, go back to the bathroom and have a "talk" with Quinn before you say anything.

DarrenCriss has some more time before his stint on Broadway and can now be Blaine, wearing an eye patch and singing with Kurt. Finn and Rachel brings films that feature eyepatches in what Finn thinks is sweet but should have probably checked with someone that it might not be considered insensitive first. Blaine gets serenaded with "Ben" for some reason, Rachel revealing that she always has a pitch pipe on her.

Santana goes to some impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Naya Rivera's favourite people to sing with, 2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show has produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a think as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are rolling in it. Some of the Warblers return with a slushy so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He slushies her and she looks less than pleased. Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their wanting to prove meerkat had done something not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her genitals, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it.

Finn tries some more to make Rachel marry him, not knowing she's already made up her mind, and then gives her the ring. They kiss really sloppily, Finn's sort-of crying.

Rachel gets her letter from [=NYADA=] and is a finalist (duh), maybe regretting her decision to marry Finn? Listen to Lucy!

Ballgown (what do you mean she'd meant to look like a teenager?) DreamSequence aside, she finishes the performance in the choir room, and everyone is amazed at how good a performer Quinn is (I thought Blaine was the only blind one?) and then more so when Will gets her to tell them all that's already been given a place at Yale. She thanks the glee kids for helping her see that she was the one standing in her way and she can't change her past but she can let it go and start her future (pointed looks at Rachel).

Santana goes to some impressive music hall which is apparently part of Dalton, to confront the Warblers about what was in the slushy. She sends away everyone but the cello guys (some of Naya Rivera's favourite people to sing with, Music/2Cellos), quickly thinking that Michael's "Smooth Criminal" will sound awesome played on cellos. It does. The duet is one of the best the show has produced, and like has been noted elsewhere, if such a think as reverse HoYay could exist, these two are rolling in it. Some of the Warblers return with a slushy so that meerkat can tell Annie that he laced the last slushy with rock salt, but it's okay. "How is it okay?" "I didn't put anything in this one." He slushies her and she looks less than pleased. Returning to [=McKinley=], Santana gets Brittany to lock everyone in the choir room before Will can find them ("I don't know how to do that!") and tells them what she did, revealing that she taped a voice recorder to her under-boob. Everybody has now gotten over the cheating, the attack on Blaine, and their wanting to prove meerkat had done something not minutes before, because he might get suspended from Dalton. He, um, should have that happen? Kurt apparently has a better idea, and Santana's not happy that she doesn't even get recognition for taping a voice recorder to her genitals, speaking for the audience when she says that if Kurt had attached something his lady-junk they'd have done a week of songs about it.

* ''Never Can Say Goodbye'' by Music/TheJackson5, performed by Quinn
* ''Human Nature'' (Music/BoyzIIMen version), performed by Mercedes and Sam

* ''Smooth Criminal'' performed by Santana and Sebastian with Music/2Cellos
* ''I Just Can't Stop Loving You'' (feat. Music/SiedahGarrett), performed by Finn and Rachel