History Quotes / DontTryThisAtHome

->'''Ruff:''': Uh, viewers at home, please do ''not'' try to play the home version of ''Match the Feces with the Species.'' Yeah, the poop the Fetchers are using has a clear protective coating, and these are trained professionals.
-->--''WesternAnimation/FetchWithRuffRuffman'', ''You Can't Teach an Orange Dog New Tricks''

-->-- '''[[Literature/TheDresdenFiles Harry Dresden]]''', ''Literature/StormFront''

->'''Ruff:''': Uh, viewers at home, please do ''not'' try to play the home version of ''Match the Feces with the Species.'' Yeah, the poop the Fetchers are using has a clear protective coating, and these are trained professionals.
-->--''WesternAnimation/FetchWithRuffRuffman'', ''You Can't Teach an Orange Dog New Tricks''

->''This is dark fantasy. All characters, while imaginary, signed consent forms before writing began. In real life, actual consent is the cornerstone of any relationship. Talk to your partner about what you want and only do what they agree to do before.''

-->-- '''[[Creator/BruceCampbell Tutorial Narrator]]''', ''Franchise/SpiderMan'' [[TheMovie movie]] videogame

-->--'''Sonic''', ''Anime/SonicX''

-->--''Literature/CherubSeries'', ''Class A''

-->--'''[[LemonyNarrator Lemony Snicket]]''', ''[[Literature/ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents The Reptile Room]]''

-->--'''[[Literature/TheDresdenFiles Harry Dresden]]''', ''Literature/StormFront''

-->--''Series/MythBusters'', almost OnceAnEpisode

-->--''Series/{{Raven}}'''s titular character, ''Raven: The Dragon's Eye''

-->--'''Guybrush''', ''VideoGame/TheCurseOfMonkeyIsland''

-->--Opening disclaimer for ''Harem''

-->--'''[[Creator/BruceCampbell Tutorial Narrator]]''', ''Franchise/SpiderMan'' [[TheMovie movie]] videogame

-->--'''Kevin Bolk''', [[http://www.mascotcomic.com/index.php?strip_id=584 I'm My Own Mascot]].

-->--'''Music/{{Hank|Green}} [[WebVideo/VlogBrothers Green]]''', ''WebVideo/CrashCourse''

-->--'''WebVideo/TheRapCritic'''

-->--'''Creator/MehdiSadaghdar'''

-->--''The Disclaimer Song, WebVideo/UnusAnnus''

-->---'''Disclaimer''', ''Funny Face''

->''"[[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead Beavis and Butt-Head]] are not role models. They're not even human; they're cartoons. Some of the things they do would cause a person to get hurt, expelled, arrested, possibly deported. To put it another way: don't try this at home."''

-->-- Some kid at the end of every episode of ''WesternAnimation/CuriousGeorge''

-->-- The opening of ''WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead''

-> "George is a monkey, so he can do things that you can't."

->'''Kevin''': Don't try this at home, kids!\\
'''Rolf''': This would be impossible, as Rolf would hit the ceiling!

->''"Disclaimer: Please DO NOT test this theory by throwing your cat out a window, an airplane, or whatever. Even if it were to survive the fall, it may not survive landing on something pointy or having its little heart explode. I will NOT have dead kitties on my conscience."

->''"Do not attempt this at home. Doing so could lead you but is not limited to death, breakage, screaming parents, dismemberment, leakage, foul discharge, mutilation, humiliation, dehydration, itchy feet, hypertension, a splinter - and you know how painful ''those'' can be! Really, if you have half a brain, think about this one!"''
-->---'''Disclaimer''', ''Funny Face''

->''"Do not try this at home. Your house isn't nearly tall enough, OK?"''
-->--'''[[Creator/BruceCampbell Tutorial Narrator]]''', ''Franchise/SpiderMan'' [[TheMovie movie]] videogame

->'''Jory:''' We may make this look easy, but trust us, it is.\\
'''Jonny:''' You still shouldn't try it at home, though.
-->-- ''WebVideo/IsItAGoodIdeaToMicrowaveThis''

->'''Jonny:''' Please don't try this at home.\\
'''Riley:''' You could get seriously injured, or even worse...\\
'''Jory:''' ...you'll be ''dead''!
-->-- Another warning from ''WebVideo/IsItAGoodIdeaToMicrowaveThis''

->''"Kids, don't use Formula One race cars to chase hedgehogs."''

->''"Disclaimer: Please DO NOT test this theory by throwing your cat out a window, an airplane, or whatever. Even if it were to survive the fall, it may not survive landing on something pointy or having its little heart explode. I will NOT have dead kitties on my conscience."
-->--'''Kevin Bolk''', [[http://www.mascotcomic.com/index.php?strip_id=584 I'm My Own Mascot]].

->‎"...if you were to, like, blenderize a live sea sponge and then leave the sponge smoothie to settle overnight, you'd wake up the next morning to find the surviving cells had found each other and were reforming themselves into a sea sponge again. Try doing ''that'' with any other animal! ...Actually '''[[SuddenlyShouting NO, DO NOT TRY DOING THAT WITH ANY OTHER ANIMAL--]]'''"
-->--'''Music/{{Hank|Green}} [[WebVideo/VlogBrothers Green]]''', ''WebVideo/CrashCourse''

->"[[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead Beavis and Butt-Head]] are not role models. They're not even human; they're cartoons. Some of the things they do would cause a person to get hurt, expelled, arrested, possibly deported. To put it another way: don't try this at home."
-->-- '''The opening of [[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead Beavis and Butt-Head]]'''.

->"It just occurred to me that mixing medicine and alcohol is a really stupid and possibly lethal thing to do. If I were a real person instead of a lovably inept cartoon character with the potential for a few more sequels... I wouldn't even consider it. Skoal!"

-> ''"Before we go any further, I want to emphasize something:''\\

-->-- '''Randall Munroe''', [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/16/ "Lightning"]], ''Blog/WhatIf''

-> ''"disclaimer: i am a cartoonist. if you follow my advice on safety around nuclear materials you probably deserve whatever happens to you."''
-->-- AltText of the third picture on the ''Blog/WhatIf'' entry [[http://what-if.xkcd.com/29/ "Spent Fuel Pool"]]

->'''Kevin''': Don't try this at home, kids!\\
'''Rolf''': This would be impossible, as Rolf would hit the ceiling!
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/EdEddNEddy'', "See No Ed"

->''"Vehicles often have additional capabilities that don't normally come into the awareness of roleplayers. But knowledge of these features can help save your skin in difficult adventure situations. For example, if your car breaks down in the desert, ''(the following is roleplaying game advice only, do '''not''' try this in real life)'' you can drink the water from the radiator.''\\
\\
''"If you're a GM you need to be on top of these sorts of things, to make sure you apply them realistically. For example, radiator water will probably have antifreeze or some other toxic chemical additives in it that may not be apparent to anyone trying to drink it. ''(And if you drink it in real life it will kill you, so don't.)''"''
--> -- '''The Comics Irregulars''', TheRant on ''Webcomic/DarthsAndDroids'' [[http://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/0968.html #968]]

->''"Just because we're dumbasses don't mean you can be one too. So, don't do any of this '''[[SoundEffectBleep *beep*]]''' that we do at home."''
-->-- ''OpeningNarration,'' Street Outlaws (a show about street racing)

->We all know, of course, that we should never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ''[[OverlyLongGag ever]]'' fiddle around in any way with electric devices. ''Never.'' There are two reasons for this. One is that you can get electrocuted, which is [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking not only deadly but very unpleasant]], and the other is that you are not [[GadgeteerGenius Violet Baudelaire]], one of the few people in the world who know how to handle such things. And even Violet was very careful and nervous as she unplugged the lamp and took a long look at the plug itself.
-->--'''[[LemonyNarrator Lemony Snicket]]''', ''[[Literature/ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents The Reptile Room]]''

->''"Don't try anything you see us do at home. We're what you call experts."''
-->--''Series/MythBusters'', almost OnceAnEpisode

-> "George is a monkey, so he can do things that you can't."
-->-- Some kid at the end of every episode of "Curious George"

-> "Remember, kids, when you touch ''burning orbs of fire'', you get mystical powers! [--No, really, don't do that, really don't.--]"

-> "Any attempt to replicate Yo-Kai behavior would be ill-advised!"
-->-- '''Whisper''', ''Anime/YoKaiWatch''

-> "Building a robot is extremely dangerous and should not be attempted without great care."
-->-- Disclaimer at the end of the Nick GAS airings of ''Series/RobotWars''

->Captain Scarlet is indestructible. ''You are not''. Remember this. Do not try to imitate him.
-->-- A warning that may be found in the opening titles of ''Series/CaptainScarletAndTheMysterons''

->''"Kids, don't try this at home. We're professionals, [[MediumAwareness and also cartoon characters]]."''
-->-- '''Garfield''', ''WesternAnimation/GarfieldAndFriends''

->''"Warning: The stories portrayed in this show are based on real deaths and are extremely graphic. Names have been changed to protect the identities of the deceased. Do not attempt to try ANY of the actions depicted... YOU WILL DIE!"''
-->-- ''Series/OneThousandWaysToDie''

->''"The author of this book would like to point out that the shoplifting technique described here only works with certain outdated security systems. [[AndSomeOtherStuff I’ve got no intention of telling you which ones they are]] because I don’t want angry dads turning up on my doorstep and kicking my head in because their little darling just got busted trying to nick something from a shop."''
-->--''Literature/CherubSeries'', ''Class A''

->''"Our Raven warriors are always supervised and have their safety checked by experts. Please do not copy the challenges yourself."''
-->--''Series/{{Raven}}'''s titular character, ''Raven: The Dragon's Eye''

->''DISCLAIMER: This balling out of control was done by a stunt rapper in a closed course. Do NOT attempt to ball on his level. You WILL end up sleeping in a box by the end of the month. In fact, don't let these lyrics fool you: you have NO idea about the actual financial stability of these rappers. These fools could be broker than you. I'm sayin', if you make $100,000 but spend $100,000 on diamonds and strip clubs to show off how rich you are, you aren't really that rich anymore, are you? Put it like this, have you ever seen a rapper in court for child support? Yeah, all of a sudden, their bank account starts sounding REAL unremarkable. And personally, I'm more likely to believe a person's words when legal proceedings are involved than when they're in a rap song, ya feel me? Just sayin', "Don't let these rap songs get you fucked up."''
-->--'''WebVideo/TheRapCritic'''

->''"As you can clearly see, I have no regards for safety. Don't be like that."''
-->--'''Creator/MehdiSadaghdar'''

->'''Content Is Not Consent'''\\
''Intense content? Mature themes?\\
It's only fiction until it's not. And when it's not, you could face criminal charges.''
-->-- Opening screen for ''VisualNovel/SomethingsWrongwithSunnyDayJack''

->''"All events depicted in this game are fictitious. We do not condone reckless driving or rude driving manners. Always adhere to the traffic laws, be mindful of the road users and drive safely. If you want to race, take it to the track."''
-->-- Opening screen for ''VideoGame/{{Wreckfest}}''

->‎"...if you were to, like, blenderize a live sea sponge and then leave the sponge smoothie to settle overnight, you'd wake up the next morning to find the surviving cells had found each other and were reforming themselves into a sea sponge again. Try doing ''that'' with any other animal! ...Actually [[SuddenlyShouting '''NO, DO NOT TRY DOING THAT WITH ANY OTHER ANIMAL--''']]"

->''"Do not attempt this at home. Doing so could lead you but is not limited to death, breakage, screaming parents, dismemberment, leakage, foul discharge, mutilation, humiliation, dehydration, itchy feet, hypertension, a splinter - And you know how painful those can be! Really, if you have half a brain, think about this one!"''

-->--'''Tutorial Narrator''' (Bruce Campbell), ''Franchise/SpiderMan'' [[TheMovie movie]] videogame

->‎"...if you were to, like, blenderize a live sea sponge and then leave the sponge smoothie to settle overnight, you'd wake up the next morning to find the surviving cells had found each other and were reforming themselves into a sea sponge again. Try doing THAT with any other animal, actually NO DO NOT TRY DOING THAT WITH ANY OTHER ANIMAL"

->"[[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead Bevis and Butt-Head]] are not role models. They're not even human, they're cartoons. Some of the things they do would cause a person to get hurt, expelled, arrested, possibly deported. To put it another way: Don't try this at home."
-->-- '''The opening of [[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead Bevis and Butt-Head]]'''.

->Captain Scarlet is indestructible; ''you are not''. Remember this. Do not try to imitate him.

->''"Kids, don't try this at home. We're professionals [[MediumAwareness and also cartoon characters]]."''

->'''Announcer:''' And remember, Building robots is extremely dangerous and should not be attempted without great care.
-->-- ''Series/RobotWars'', The Nickelodeon version.

->''"The author of this book would like to point out that the shoplifting technique described here only works with certain outdated security systems. [[AndSomeOtherStuff I’ve got no intention of telling you which ones they are]] because I don’t want angry Dads turning up on my doorstep and kicking my head in because their little darling just got busted trying to nick something from a shop."''

->'''Content Is Not Consent'''
->''Intense content? Mature themes?''
->''It's only fiction until it's not. And when it's not, you could face criminal charges.''

->'''Jory''': We may make this look easy, but trust us, it is.\\
'''Jonny''': You still shouldn't try it at home, though.

->'''Jon''': Please don't try this at home.\\
'''Riley''': You could get seriously injured, or even worse...\\
'''Jory''': ...you'll be ''dead''!

-->--'''Kevin Bolk'''. [[http://www.mascotcomic.com/index.php?strip_id=584 I'm My Own Mascot]].

-->-- ''Series/RobotWars'' The Nickelodeon version.

->''"The author of this book would like to point out that the shoplifting technique described here only works with certain outdated security systems. I’ve got no intention of telling you which ones they are because I don’t want angry Dads turning up on my doorstep and kicking my head in because their little darling just got busted trying to nick something from a shop."''

->We all know, of course, that we should never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ''ever'' fiddle around in any way with electric devices. ''Never.'' There are two reasons for this. One is that you can get electrocuted, which is [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking not only deadly but very unpleasant]], and the other is that you are not [[GadgeteerGenius Violet Baudelaire]], one of the few people in the world who know how to handle such things. And even Violet was very careful and nervous as she unplugged the lamp and took a long look at the plug itself.

->"[[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead Bevis and Butthead]] are not role models. They're not even human, they're cartoons. Some of the things they do would cause a person to get hurt, expelled, arrested, possibly deported. To put it another way: Don't try this at home."
-->-- '''The opening of [[WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButthead Bevis and Butthead]]'''.