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History Quotes / DoYouWantToHaggle

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->''(Peter lies in a coffin, then wakes up)''

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->''(Peter lies in a coffin, coffin,'' ''[[BaitAndSwitch then wakes up)''up]])''
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->''(Peter lies in a coffin, then wakes up)''
->'''Peter''': I'll take this one, but I won't pay a cent over 60 bucks.
->'''Salesman''': Sir, that casket costs $1000.
->'''Peter''': Okay, 70 bucks.
->'''Salesman''': What?
->'''Peter''': 2000 bucks!
->'''Salesman''': That's twice what it costs.
->'''Peter''': 40 bucks.
->'''Salesman''': What?
->'''Brian''': He...he doesn't know how to haggle.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'', "[[Recap/FamilyGuyS2E6DeathisABitch Death is a Bitch]]"
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->'''Dorien''': He wanted £40 for it, so I offered thirty.
->'''Tracey''': An' wha' didja settle on?
->'''Dorien''': Fifty-five. He had muscles to die for.
-->-- ''Series/BirdsOfAFeather'', "[[Recap/BirdsOfAFeatherS5E7ABrushWithTheLaw A Brush with the Law]]"
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-->--''Film/PiratesOfTheCaribbeanDeadMansChest''

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-->--''Film/PiratesOfTheCaribbeanDeadMansChest''-->--''Film/PiratesOfTheCaribbeanDeadMansChest''

->'''Professor Vooshka''': How much rent you asking?
->'''Barnes''': Well I'm, I'm only a simple man you see, I, I don't understand figures. ({{Beat}}) Thirty quid a week. (Professor Vooshka gasps)
->'''Professor Crump''': £30?! You ''must'' be insane.
->'''Barnes''': All right then, all right twenty-five, take it or leave it.
->'''Professor Crump''': We'll leave it!
->'''Professor Vooshka''': We're taking. Fifteen quids a veek.
->'''Barnes''': Twenty.
->'''Professor Crump''': Now look here, the only reason we want this dilapidated mobile hovel is for somewhere to do our operations.
->'''Barnes''': Operations? ({{Beat}}) What kind of operations?
->'''Professor Crump''': Somewhere to examine our artifacts.
->'''Professor Vooshka''': He will be getting them out and I shall be examining them, and then shticking labels on them.
->'''Barnes''': You, you do what you like - it's still twenty quid a week.
->'''Professor Vooshka''': Fifteen is last offer, da?
->'''Barnes''': Fifteen for my lovely home?!
->'''Professor Vooshka''': Da.
->'''Barnes''': Right, but I'm not leavin' the beddin'!
-->-- ''Film/CarryOnBehind''
----
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->'''Davy Jones:''' One soul is not equal to another!\\
'''Captain Jack Sparrow:''' Aha! So we've established the proposal is sound in principle, now we're just haggling over the price.
-->--''Film/PiratesOfTheCaribbeanDeadMansChest''
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-->--''WebVideo/VaguelyRecallingJoJo

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-->--''WebVideo/VaguelyRecallingJoJo-->--''WebVideo/VaguelyRecallingJoJo''

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'''Joseph Narration''': Now they try to gauge how much the customer is willing to spend.
This is your chance! Say a price you think is just a bit too "whoa".\\

to:

'''Joseph Narration''': Now they try to gauge how much the customer is willing to spend. \n This is your chance! Say a price you think is just a bit too "whoa".\\
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->'''[[Manga/JoJosBizarreAdventure Joseph Joestar]]''': Just you guys watch! I'll show you what a man who was able to "whoa whoa" right in the SPW Foundation can do to barter.\\
(Joseph greets the kebab salesman.)\\
'''Joseph''': Asalam! How much fer seven peeps worth?\\
'''Kebab Salesman''': Five bucks.\\
'''Joseph''': Five bucks?\\
(Joseph laughs.)\\
'''Joseph''': How ridiculous can you be? You need to know who you're dealing with.\\
'''Joseph Narration''': Rule #1: Always appear as if you know how much it's worth. Flatter the guy.\\
'''Kebab Salesman''': How much are you buyin' for?\\
'''Joseph Narration''': Now they try to gauge how much the customer is willing to spend.
This is your chance! Say a price you think is just a bit too "whoa".\\
'''Joseph''': Make it 7 peeps worth at a cent.\\
'''Kebab Salesman''': 4.50, I can't go lower than that!\\
'''Joseph''': Sell it for 1 cent. Begin the barter! 1 cent! 1 cent! 1 cent! 1 cent! 1 cent! 1 cent! 1 cent! 1 cent!\\
'''Kebab Salesman''': 4.50! 4.50! 4.50!\\
'''Joseph''': 1 cent! 1 cent! 1 cent! If it's not 1 cent, I dun want it~ dun want it~\\
'''Kebab Salesman''': Fine, take it for 1 cent.\\
'''Joseph Narration''': Huzzah!
-->--''WebVideo/VaguelyRecallingJoJo

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