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I feel like we were burying the lede in the first version


* The chat transcript! Imagine a group of girls chatting with each other, all friendly and entirely normal. They talk about how they don't remember certain times of night. Gradually the conversation gets more creepy (one girl starts replying to everything with the word "serve") as the girls start talking about other worlds they have seen and what is in them. The end of the transcript is just...seriously, reading it gives one chills.

to:

* The chat transcript! Imagine a group of girls chatting with each other, all friendly and entirely normal. They talk about how they don't remember certain times of night. Gradually the conversation gets more creepy (one by one, each girl starts replying to everything with the repeating one word "serve") in the phrase "I Serve None But Korrok") as the girls start talking about other worlds they have seen and what is in them. The end of the transcript is just...seriously, reading it gives one chills.
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None


* "There are always some who...resist progress." He is referring to a scene where thousands of spiders maim and gore millions of men and women in trench warfare. Not kill. Maim. The scene is extremely unsettling to imagine.

to:

* "There are always some who... resist progress." He is referring to a scene where thousands of spiders maim and gore millions of men and women in trench warfare. Not kill. Maim. The scene is extremely unsettling to imagine.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was already infected, and the barrier between our world and theirs was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen, leaving splatters of blood from their fists, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard of snow before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''

to:

* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed manages to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was already infected, and the barrier between our world and theirs was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen, leaving splatters of blood from their fists, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard of snow before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was already infected, and the barrier between our world and theirs was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen in a splatter of blood, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''

to:

* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was already infected, and the barrier between our world and theirs was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen in a splatter screen, leaving splatters of blood, blood from their fists, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard of snow before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was infected already, and the barrier between our world and theirs was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen in a splatter of blood, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''

to:

* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was infected already, already infected, and the barrier between our world and theirs was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen in a splatter of blood, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was infected already, and the barrier between our world and their own was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen in a splatter of blood, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''

to:

* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was infected already, and the barrier between our world and their own theirs was impassable. The individual pounds desperately on the TV screen in a splatter of blood, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks is a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. The hands on the TV screen pound so hard that the skin on the knuckles splits open and the entire television ''shakes.'' David at first thinks he's watching a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''

to:

* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying insects. Someone managed to open one final portal to our world for a few moments in an attempt to escape, which manifests on David's TV screen. Only it was already too late, as the individual trying to get through was infected already, and the barrier between our world and their own was impassable. The hands individual pounds desperately on the TV screen pound so hard that the skin on the knuckles splits open and the entire television ''shakes.'' in a splatter of blood, causing David's TV in our world to ''shake''. David can only see the individual's hands, as the rest is obscured by what at first he thinks he's watching is a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying worms. The hands on the TV screen pound so hard that the skin on the knuckles splits open and the entire television ''shakes.''

to:

* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying worms.insects. The hands on the TV screen pound so hard that the skin on the knuckles splits open and the entire television ''shakes.'' David at first thinks he's watching a thick blizzard before he realizes... ''it's the insects.''

Added: 732

Changed: 844

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Moments subpages are Spoilers Off pages


* Pretty much any creature described in the book is a combination of hilarious and terrifying. [[spoiler:Anyone could be a replicant. Even you. And, oh yes, the baddies can travel through time and wipe you or anyone you love from existence any time they choose. Or may already have done so, since you'd never remember the difference.]] Even outside the supernatural, Dave and various monsters' speeches about the horrors of life itself are disturbingly reasonable. Warning: Do NOT try to read this story to cure insomnia.
* "There are always some who...resist progress." [[spoiler: He is referring to a scene where thousands of spiders maim and gore millions of men and women in trench warfare. Not kill. Maim.]] The scene is extremely unsettling to imagine.

to:

'''As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked [[Administrivia/SpoilersOff as per policy.]] Administrivia/YouHaveBeenWarned.'''
----
* Pretty much any creature described in the book is a combination of hilarious and terrifying. [[spoiler:Anyone Anyone could be a replicant. Even you. And, oh yes, the baddies can travel through time and wipe you or anyone you love from existence any time they choose. Or may already have done so, since you'd never remember the difference.]] Even outside the supernatural, Dave and various monsters' speeches about the horrors of life itself are disturbingly reasonable. Warning: Do NOT try to read this story to cure insomnia.
* "There are always some who...resist progress." [[spoiler: He is referring to a scene where thousands of spiders maim and gore millions of men and women in trench warfare. Not kill. Maim.]] The scene is extremely unsettling to imagine.



* The end of the first plot arc, when you learn that some of the unreliable narrator's unreliability is (in his mind anyway) due to [[spoiler: the fact that one of the main characters was actually erased from existence at the climax. The only evidence that he ever did exist are memories dredged up during the narrator's Soy Sauce flashback hallucinations]].
* The demonic version of Ronald [=McDonald=] that Dave sees is [[spoiler:being forced to [[BodyHorror eat his own guts]]]]. And it's described in quite a bit of detail.

to:

* The end of the first plot arc, when you learn that some of the unreliable narrator's unreliability is (in his mind anyway) due to [[spoiler: the fact that one of the main characters was actually erased from existence at the climax. The only evidence that he ever did exist are memories dredged up during the narrator's Soy Sauce flashback hallucinations]].
hallucinations.
* The demonic version of Ronald [=McDonald=] that Dave sees is [[spoiler:being being forced to [[BodyHorror eat his own guts]]]].guts]]. And it's described in quite a bit of detail.



* Late in the book, David explains to Amy that he had a really bad time in high school. It got to a point that everything just went wrong at once, [[spoiler: and he may have been raped, which led to a fight with his tormentors that involved him cutting one of said tormentors' eyes out. Said tormentor later killed himself.]]

to:

* Late in the book, David explains to Amy that he had a really bad time in high school. It got to a point that everything just went wrong at once, [[spoiler: and he may have been raped, which led to a fight with his tormentors that involved him cutting one of said tormentors' eyes out. Said tormentor later killed himself.]]
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None


* On the film, the priest that Dave calls turns (courtesy of a Soy Sauce hallucination) into a black-eyed monster that talks with the VoiceOfTheLegion and tells Dave that the world is going to end... played in a cameo by Angus Scrimm, for those who just can't have enough of [[Film/{{Phantasm}} The Tall Man]] livening up their nightmares.

to:

* On the film, the priest that Dave calls turns (courtesy of a Soy Sauce hallucination) into a black-eyed monster that talks with the VoiceOfTheLegion and tells Dave that the world is going to end... played in a cameo by Angus Scrimm, for those who just can't have enough of [[Film/{{Phantasm}} The Tall Man]] livening up their nightmares.nightmares.
* The final transmission from Shit Narnia as the entire world is consumed by the flying worms. The hands on the TV screen pound so hard that the skin on the knuckles splits open and the entire television ''shakes.''
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None

Added DiffLines:

** The audiobook version is even creepier.
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None


* The chat transcript! Imagine a group of girls chatting with each other, all friendly and entirely normal. They talk about how they don't remember certain times of night. Gradually the conversation gets more creepy (one girl starts replying to everything with the word "serve") as the girls start talking about other worlds they have seen and what is in them. The end of the transcript is just...seriously, reading it gives one chills.

to:

* The chat transcript! Imagine a group of girls chatting with each other, all friendly and entirely normal. They talk about how they don't remember certain times of night. Gradually the conversation gets more creepy (one girl starts replying to everything with the word "serve") as the girls start talking about other worlds they have seen and what is in them. The end of the transcript is just...seriously, reading it gives one chills.chills.
* On the film, the priest that Dave calls turns (courtesy of a Soy Sauce hallucination) into a black-eyed monster that talks with the VoiceOfTheLegion and tells Dave that the world is going to end... played in a cameo by Angus Scrimm, for those who just can't have enough of [[Film/{{Phantasm}} The Tall Man]] livening up their nightmares.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* How has no one mentioned the friggin' chat transcript!! Imagine a group of girls chatting with each other, all friendly and entirely normal. They talk about how they don't remember certain times of night. Gradually the conversation gets more creepy (one girl starts replying to everything with the word "serve") as the girls start talking about other worlds they have seen and what is in them. The end of the transcript is just...seriously, reading it gives one chills.

to:

* How has no one mentioned the friggin' The chat transcript!! transcript! Imagine a group of girls chatting with each other, all friendly and entirely normal. They talk about how they don't remember certain times of night. Gradually the conversation gets more creepy (one girl starts replying to everything with the word "serve") as the girls start talking about other worlds they have seen and what is in them. The end of the transcript is just...seriously, reading it gives one chills.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The idea of Korrok itself. A giant malevolent force insinuating itself into as many realities as it can while convincing the peoples of those realities that it's there to help. Not to mention the fact that it has the maturity of a 13 year old.

to:

* The idea of Korrok itself. A giant malevolent force insinuating itself into as many realities as it can while convincing the peoples of those realities that it's there to help. Not to mention the fact that it has the maturity of a 13 year old.old.
* How has no one mentioned the friggin' chat transcript!! Imagine a group of girls chatting with each other, all friendly and entirely normal. They talk about how they don't remember certain times of night. Gradually the conversation gets more creepy (one girl starts replying to everything with the word "serve") as the girls start talking about other worlds they have seen and what is in them. The end of the transcript is just...seriously, reading it gives one chills.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* Late in the book, David explains to Amy that he had a really bad time in high school. It got to a point that everything just went wrong at once, [[spoiler: and he may have been raped, which led to a fight with his tormentors that involved him cutting one of said tormentors' eyes out. Said tormentor later killed himself.]]

to:

* Late in the book, David explains to Amy that he had a really bad time in high school. It got to a point that everything just went wrong at once, [[spoiler: and he may have been raped, which led to a fight with his tormentors that involved him cutting one of said tormentors' eyes out. Said tormentor later killed himself.]]]]
* The idea of Korrok itself. A giant malevolent force insinuating itself into as many realities as it can while convincing the peoples of those realities that it's there to help. Not to mention the fact that it has the maturity of a 13 year old.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* We get a very graphic scene of a ten year old boy melt while screaming in pain, and be [[BodyHorror transformed]] into a squealing pig while John and Dave watch in horror.

to:

* We get a very graphic scene of a ten year old boy melt while screaming in pain, and be [[BodyHorror transformed]] into a squealing pig while John and Dave watch in horror.horror.
* Late in the book, David explains to Amy that he had a really bad time in high school. It got to a point that everything just went wrong at once, [[spoiler: and he may have been raped, which led to a fight with his tormentors that involved him cutting one of said tormentors' eyes out. Said tormentor later killed himself.]]
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None

Added DiffLines:

** Thanks to the film, imagination is unnecessary. The scene makes very explicit note that children were also included in the slaughter, though it avoids directly showing them being maimed.
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None


* We get a very graphic scene of a ten year old boy melt while screaming in pain, and be [[BodyHorror transformed]] into some... ''Thing'' while John and Dave watch in horror.

to:

* We get a very graphic scene of a ten year old boy melt while screaming in pain, and be [[BodyHorror transformed]] into some... ''Thing'' a squealing pig while John and Dave watch in horror.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None


* The demonic version of Ronald [=McDonald=] that Dave sees is [[spoiler:being forced to [[BodyHorror eat his own guts]]]]. And it's described in quite a bit of detail.

to:

* The demonic version of Ronald [=McDonald=] that Dave sees is [[spoiler:being forced to [[BodyHorror eat his own guts]]]]. And it's described in quite a bit of detail.detail.
* We get a very graphic scene of a ten year old boy melt while screaming in pain, and be [[BodyHorror transformed]] into some... ''Thing'' while John and Dave watch in horror.
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
Moved from the YMMV page.

Added DiffLines:

* Pretty much any creature described in the book is a combination of hilarious and terrifying. [[spoiler:Anyone could be a replicant. Even you. And, oh yes, the baddies can travel through time and wipe you or anyone you love from existence any time they choose. Or may already have done so, since you'd never remember the difference.]] Even outside the supernatural, Dave and various monsters' speeches about the horrors of life itself are disturbingly reasonable. Warning: Do NOT try to read this story to cure insomnia.
* "There are always some who...resist progress." [[spoiler: He is referring to a scene where thousands of spiders maim and gore millions of men and women in trench warfare. Not kill. Maim.]] The scene is extremely unsettling to imagine.
* The end of the first plot arc, when you learn that some of the unreliable narrator's unreliability is (in his mind anyway) due to [[spoiler: the fact that one of the main characters was actually erased from existence at the climax. The only evidence that he ever did exist are memories dredged up during the narrator's Soy Sauce flashback hallucinations]].
* The demonic version of Ronald [=McDonald=] that Dave sees is [[spoiler:being forced to [[BodyHorror eat his own guts]]]]. And it's described in quite a bit of detail.

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