History Main / SquashMatch

Compare CurbStompBattle and TheWorfEffect (given wrestling's [[SportsStory nature]], its possible to pull off those tropes without the recipient losing a match). Not to be confused with the racket and ball sport known as squash, though [[http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_753_the-20-most-amazing-people-youve-never-heard-of_p2/ Heather McKay did "squash" her competition for 19 years]].

* Wrestling/{{TNA}}, ''Victory Road 2011'': In the main event, Wrestling/{{Sting}} defended the TNA World Heavyweight Championship against Wrestling/JeffHardy in ''ninety seconds''. To put that in perspective, the introductions and announcements preceding the match lasted over eight minutes. Unfortunately, this was due to the worst of reasons: Hardy was "in no condition to perform"[[note]]Reports vary on exactly ''when'' TNA officials noticed this. Some reports suggest that it was noticed early but the officials decided that he could "shake it off" before the match; others suggest that it was only when Hardy was (failing to) ascend the entrance rampway that officials realised something was horribly wrong.[[/note]] and Sting was instructed to end it early to minimise the risk of injury to both performers. And Sting was righteously ''pissed'' about it. (You can see it [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2V6ulxTRSDc here]], but it's not pretty.)

* The first big squash match was at the first ''[=WrestleMania=]''. Wrestling/KingKongBundy defeated SD Jones in an announced 9 seconds (though the match was actually 23 seconds from bell to bell).

** Ironically, his first match after winning the [[http://www.wrestling-titles.com/us/roh/-roh.html ROH World Heavyweight Championship]] in an extended squash (Homicide got some offense) was against B.J. Whitmer for a bit under fifteen minutes... the under-3-minutes squash rematch at the company's first PPV was more entertaining.

* Squash matches can also be used as a simple mechanic to establish fans' familiarity with newer wrestlers and their skillsets, particularly their FinishingMove.

* In mid-2011, Wrestling/BrodusClay has had several matches like this on B-show ''Wrestling/WWESuperstars.'' He even pulls their heads up from his first attempt at a pinfall to beat on them some more. The jobbers could count themselves lucky if they managed to get a single offensive move (or even a dodge) in against him.

This tactic was most in vogue during the late Eighties and early Nineties, where top stars retained their star power by being fed a steady supply of rookies while their upcoming opponents were groomed in the short-term by the same method. A typical episode of ''[[Wrestling/{{WWERaw}} WWF/E Monday Night Raw]]'' during that time would consist of four to five short squash matches, and one main event that would usually be either a squash by a top-level star or end in a non-finish. The [[ButtMonkey faceless losers]] that were on the receiving end of these matches were euphemistically referred to as "enhancement talent" (aka {{Jobber}}s, as in "doing the job", 'cuz someone has to lose), with [[http://www.wrestlecrap.com/category/jobbers/jotw/ a handful gaining cult fame or even making entire careers out of it]].[[note]]In professional wrestling, the majority of work is usually done by the person ''receiving'' the moves rather than the person performing them: setting up the move, executing the move in a safe fashion for both wrestlers and making it look like the move was effective. Because this skill set is so critically important, this can lead to a strange phenomenon where the perpetual losers are actually ''better'' at their jobs than the winners, and stay losers because [[TheDilbertPrinciple they're so good at making others look better.]][[note]]

-->--Presquashed Matt Striker: ''Monday Night Raw''

* First, it's a quick and simple way to get monster [[{{Heel}} heels]] over (i.e. make them popular). By having them mercilessly destroy innocent and weak {{Face}} wrestlers, you create a formidable and threatening opponent for your star player to eventually defeat.

This tactic was most in vogue during the late Eighties and early Nineties, where top stars retained their star power by being fed a steady supply of rookies while their upcoming opponents were groomed in the short-term by the same method. A typical episode of ''[[Wrestling/{{WWERaw}} WWF/E Monday Night Raw]]'' during that time would consist of four to five short squash matches, and one main event that would usually be either a squash by a top-level star or end in a non-finish. The [[ButtMonkey faceless losers]] that were on the receiving end of these matches were euphemistically referred to as "enhancement talent" (aka {{Jobber}}s, as in "doing the job", 'cuz someone has to lose), with [[http://www.wrestlecrap.com/category/jobbers/jotw/ a handful gaining cult fame or even making entire careers out of it]].[[labelnote:note]]In professional wrestling, the majority of work is usually done by the person ''receiving'' the moves rather than the person performing them: setting up the move, executing the move in a safe fashion for both wrestlers and making it look like the move was effective. Because this skill set is so critically important, this can lead to a strange phenomenon where the perpetual losers are actually ''better'' at their jobs than the winners, and stay losers because [[TheDilbertPrinciple they're so good at making others look better.]][[/labelnote]]

It's worth pointing out that squash matches ''alone'' are usually a very poor way of getting a wrestler over. While it is true that if a wrestler never loses, he will inevitably get over with the fans, it usually takes either incredible charisma or superior ring ability to make your mark on the average wrestling fan. Contrast Wrestling/{{Goldberg}} - whose sheer intensity during his matches was something truly special to behold - with Chris "The Masterpiece" Masters, who boasted a submission hold that was booked to be unbreakable yet was utterly unremarkable in every other area.

An over-abundance of squash matches were also one of the reasons why Wrestling/{{WWE}} lost their lead in the ratings battle with WCW for over a year, as their predictable and boring squashes were forced to compete with Monday Nitro's packed card of quality, competitive matches every week. WWE was eventually forced to change their tactics and ditch their reliance on squashes for their main television programs, although their C-level shows (e.g. Superstars, Sunday Night Heat, Velocity) would continue the old ways.

Compare CurbStompBattle and TheWorfEffect (given wrestling's [[SportsStory nature]], its possible to pull off those tropes without the recipient losing a match). Not to be confused with the racket and ball sport known as squash, even if [[http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_753_the-20-most-amazing-people-youve-never-heard-of_p2/ Heather McKay did "squash" her competition for 19 years]].

* The first big squash match was at the first [=WrestleMania=]. Wrestling/KingKongBundy defeated SD Jones in an announced 9 seconds (though the match was actually 23 seconds from bell to bell).

[[folder:Professional wrestling]]

** Although in the Warrior's case, squashes were necessary as he was in such poor condition from steroid abuse that his ring entrance (a sprint to the ring) would leave him breathless and exhausted. There's a reason his generally-considered best match (against Wrestling/RandySavage at ''[=WrestleMania=] VII'', which went a shade over 20 minutes) had the Warrior WALK to the ring to start it.
** He also had a very, ''very'' limited moveset (mostly clotheslines, tackles, and simple slams) and often didn't execute them properly. Thus, matches were short to not "stink up the joint" (as [[Wrestling/TedDiBiase Ted [=DiBiase=]]] stated) and probably to limit the potentiality that he would injure his opponent through a poorly made slam. The aforementioned Honky Tonk Man squash was HTM's idea. At the time, he insisted it'd be highly satisfying to fans for him to lose that way after using every dirty trick in the book to keep the IC title for over a year, but he later admitted he insisted on being squashed because he didn't want Warrior to injure him.

** The ''funniest'' example had to be when [[LandDownUnder Bushwhacker Luke]] came to the ring doing the Bushwhackers signature SillyWalk. He was still doing it as he entered the ring, was immediately eliminated, and then walked right back up the ramp, never interrupting his stride.

* Wrestling/{{Chyna}} vs. [[Characters/WWEDivas Ivory]] at [=WrestleMania XVII=]. Chyna just utterly destroyed Ivory, smiling the entire time like she was throwing around a doll, and then she finished her with a powerbomb. Chyna went for the pin, pulled Ivory up at the count of two, and then opted to gorilla press a defenseless Ivory to a cheering crowd. Then, without turning around to face her again, Chyna sat down and "pinned" Ivory simply by leaning back on her like Ivory was the back of a reclining chair, as the ref counted to 3.

* Wrestling/{{TNA}}, ''Victory Road 2011'': In the main event, Wrestling/{{Sting}} defended the TNA World Heavyweight Championship against Wrestling/JeffHardy in ''one and a half minutes''. To put this in perspective, the introductions and announcements preceding the match lasted over ''eight'' minutes. Unfortunately, this was due to the worst of reasons: Hardy was "in no condition to perform"[[labelnote:*]]Reports vary on exactly ''when'' TNA officials noticed this. Some reports suggest that it was noticed early but the officials decided that he could "shake it off" before the match; others suggest that it was only when Hardy was (failing to) ascend the entrance rampway that officials realised something was horribly wrong.[[/labelnote]] and Sting was instructed to end it early to minimise the risk of injury to both performers. And Sting was righteously ''pissed'' about it. (You can see it [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2V6ulxTRSDc here]], but it's not pretty.)

* A particularly infamous example occurred at [=WrestleMania 28=], when Wrestling/{{Sheamus}} squashed [[http://www.wrestling-titles.com/wwe/wwe-world-h.html Heavyweight Champion]] [[Wrestling/BryanDanielson Daniel Bryan]] in 18 seconds. The match was so anti-climatic and the result so detestable[[labelnote:*]](At that time, Daniel Bryan was blazing hot as a self-obsessed {{Heel}} whose dorky, over-the-top celebrations sparked the "Yes! Yes! Yes!" phenomenon. Sheamus was less popular by comparison (although WWE was pushing him much harder than Bryan), but still regarded by many as a good worker and an excellent opponent for Bryan. They were expected to have a classic, well-fought match, with the anticipation heightened by the fact that the Bryan/Sheamus title match at the ''last'' Wrestlemania was unfairly bumped to "dark match" status.)[[/labelnote]] that it severely deflated the audience for the next two matches and led to an InternetBackdraft. The worst part was that the Wrestling/{{WWE}} were ''trying'' to create a "Wrestlemania Moment" by having Sheamus break the record for the shortest ever Wrestlemania title match, and ''they failed to beat it'', rendering the entire exercise a complete waste.

* [[Wrestling/AlexanderRusev Alexander Rusev]] has been like this since his January 2014 main roster debut.
* Wrestling/BrockLesnar squashed Wrestling/JohnCena ''clean'' at ''Summerslam 2014''. No successful comebacks, no turns of momentum, no CENAWINSLOL. Only the Ultimate Underdog and the face of the WWE getting demolished by the biggest overdog there is, the Beast who Broke the Streak. One other aspect that set this match apart from other squashes is that this was not a 30 second match, where the eventual winner so overwhelms his foe from the outset that he is able to go in for the kill almost immediately; rather, this was a 16-minute match where Lesnar was practically forcing Cena to concede defeat, and took sadistic pleasure in totally overwhelming him, using 16 German suplexes and two F-5 firemen's carries to finally defeat an exhausted Cena.

* A type of "squash match" is very frequently seen in sports – most often, the high school and collegiate levels – although these aren't referred to as squash matches, although it is almost always an assured win for one of the teams by a sizable margin. Still, the resemblance is uncanny: A team – often in an early-season exhibition or non-conference or game – will play against an overmatched opponent. These games often allow players to practice plays and skills in actual game situations and gain confidence, get fans to become familiar with whom the top players will be (and their attributes), plus help coaches to assess talent of both starters and reserves (frequently, a junior varsity player will see quite a bit of action) and determine regular-game rotations, things the team needs to work on and so forth prior to playing the "meat" – i.e., conference portion – of their schedule. This is pretty much the rule for homecoming games. Losing the game would dampen the celebration, so these matches are usually played against a weak opponent.

** A bit rarer, but sometimes seen in the world of boxing, where a rising or "seasoned" star is matched against a lesser opponent – as in [=MMA=], these journeymen boxers are a "tomato can" – in which they can easily work over and eventually defeat with little to no difficulty.
* A type of "squash match" is very frequently seen in sports – most often, the high school and collegiate levels – although these aren't referred to as squash matches, although it is almost always an assured win for one of the teams by a sizable margin. Still, the resemblance is uncanny: A team – often in an early-season exhibition or non-conference or game – will play against an overmatched opponent. These games often allow players to practice plays and skills in actual game situations and gain confidence, get fans to become familiar with whom the top players will be (and their attributes), plus help coaches to assess talent of both starters and reserves (frequently, a junior varsity player will see quite a bit of action) and determine regular-game rotations, things the team needs to work on and so forth prior to playing the "meat" – i.e., conference portion – of their schedule.
** This is pretty much the rule for homecoming games. Losing the game would dampen the celebration, so these matches are usually played against a weak opponent.

* A June 11th 2011 Ice Ribbon show saw Emi Sakura on the mid card, looking to start evening the score against her former pupil Tsukushi, who had somehow or another beaten Sakura in their last four encounters. The bell rang and Tsukushi got her fastest win yet, pinning Sakura in four seconds.

!Professional wrestling examples

!Other Media
* [[WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies]]:
** "WesternAnimation/BunnyHugged," an early 1950s portrait of professional wrestling starring WesternAnimation/BugsBunny. Here, the short's main villain, the Crusher (a [[WrestlingMonster Monster Heel]]) pummels [[Wrestling/GeorgeWagner Gorgeous George]]-clone Ravishing Ronald into brutal submission; when Ronald's cries for help go unanswered, Ronald's "mascot" (Bugs) decides to step in. (Bugs, who initially steps in as "The Masked Terror," is knocked around early in the bout, but eventually gets the upper hand.)
** ''WesternAnimation/BullyForBugs''. Although it has nothing to do with wrestling, the "squash" part comes early in the cartoon, where a magnificent bull is able to easily defeat a cowardly matador.
* Comics/Film example: Immediately after discovering he has super-powers, [[Franchise/{{SpiderMan}} Peter Parker]] goes up against a pro wrestler (Bonesaw in the movie, "Crusher" Hogan in the comics), whose promoter is offering a cash prize to anyone who can stay in the ring with him for five minutes. Until Parker makes a fool of him, naturally no one can.

* In ''WesternAnimation/CelebrityDeathmatch'', the Loch Ness Monster kills Bigfoot in ''six seconds'', before the bell rang. The audience members hated the ending of the match, and commentator Wrestling/StoneColdSteveAustin called that match "a six-second suckfest".
* Not uncommon in UsefulNotes/MixedMartialArts organizations that are trying to push the popularity of a fighter or "season" a rising star. The star is matched against an obviously inferior fighter, sometimes called a "tomato can" or "can," for an easy win. The Japanese promotion PRIDE FC was particularly fond of this trope, often padding out the resumes of its star fighters like Fedor Emelianenko with matches against popular but vastly outmatched Japanese professional wrestlers. The UsefulNotes/{{U|ltimateFightingChampionship}}FC is also not immune to this practice. For example, the 12-0 British rising star Michael Bisping was matched in his third [=UFC=] fight against 8-9-2 Elvis Sinosic.
** A bit rarer, but sometimes seen in the world of boxing, where a rising or "seasoned" star is matched against a lesser opponent – as in [=MMA=], these journeymen boxers are a "tomato can" – in which they can easily work over and eventually defeat with little to no difficulty.
* ''WesternAnimation/DennisTheMenace'': The 1986 animated series had an episode where Dennis discovers a medieval warrior named Thor in a block of ice, thaws him out, becomes friends with him and raises havoc all over town. The segment ends at a pro wrestling match, where a Monster Heel is making mincemeat out of a hapless challenger in a championship bout, after which he heckles the crowd and demands a real challenge. Thor immediately accepts, makes short work of the monster heel and wins the match … and shockingly the title (even though he was not a wrestler signed to the organization). (Perhaps this was a nod to the hype involving then-WWF newcomer Hulk Hogan challenging and ultimately beating champion [[Wrestling/TheIronSheik The Iron Sheik]] for the title, just days after arriving in the WWF).
* A type of "squash match" is very frequently seen in sports – most often, the high school and collegiate levels – although these aren't referred to as squash matches, although it is almost always an assured win for one of the teams by a sizable margin. Still, the resemblance is uncanny: A team – often in an early-season exhibition or non-conference or game – will play against an overmatched opponent. These games often allow players to practice plays and skills in actual game situations and gain confidence, get fans to become familiar with whom the top players will be (and their attributes), plus help coaches to assess talent of both starters and reserves (frequently, a junior varsity player will see quite a bit of action) and determine regular-game rotations, things the team needs to work on and so forth prior to playing the "meat" – i.e., conference portion – of their schedule.
** This is pretty much the rule for homecoming games. Losing the game would dampen the celebration, so these matches are usually played against a weak opponent.
* The first match in the Arena sub-plot of ''VideoGame/JadeEmpire'' is against an ogre, a slow-moving, slow-attacking enemy that wasn't all that big a threat two chapters previous. The promoter explains that, in addition to showing off for the crowd (the "big names" of the arena have particular stories about how they fought it, like The Ravager's SingleStrokeBattle), it's a test that you aren't ''completely'' hopeless. The entire provisional tier of competition is a series of less intentional squash matches because they're mostly for keeping the local dojo kids out of the "real" tiers and are in no way a threat to TheChosenOne.

* ''NewspaperComics/Curtis'': The title character's favorite athlete, a former world champion boxer named Percy Percy Coleman (meant to be a clear Expy of former Real Life champion Buster Douglas), often attempts comeback fights that always end with him being on the receiving end of one of these. The match ALWAYS is described with these lines:

* Skull Crusher Slyck Wagner Brown's 2010 run in Ring Of Honor consisted mostly of squash matches by way of burning hammer.

* //NewspaperComics/Curtis'': The title character's favorite athlete, a former world champion boxer named Percy Percy Coleman (meant to be a clear Expy of former Real Life champion Buster Douglas), often attempts comeback fights that always end with him being on the receiving end of one of these. The match ALWAYS is described with these lines:

* ''ComicBook/JudgeDredd'': In "The Wilderness Days", the [[DirtyCop corrupt Judges]] of post-apocalyptic [[VivaLasVegas Las Vegas]] use the leverage of weapons of mass destruction to convince a wandering [[OmnicidalManiac Judge Death]] to take part in a series of boxing matches. A group of increasingly suicidal contenders go up against the undead life-hating monster, [[LudicrousGibs with messy results]].

** "Bunny Hugged," an early 1950s portrait of professional wrestling starring WesternAnimation/BugsBunny. Here, the short's main villain, the Crusher (a [[WrestlingMonster Monster Heel]]) pummels [[Wrestling/GeorgeWagner Gorgeous George]]-clone Ravishing Ronald into brutal submission; when Ronald's cries for help go unanswered, Ronald's "mascot" (Bugs) decides to step in. (Bugs, who initially steps in as "The Masked Terror," is knocked around early in the bout, but eventually gets the upper hand.)

* Rick Cataldo has been on the receiving end of many in Wrestling/{{WSU}}. Alere Little Feather beat him one minute, Angel Orsini thirty seconds, Amy Lee beat with Vinny G at the same time and Wrestling/AwesomeKong destroyed him and Roxie Cotton and would have done it again if he had [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere abandoned Cotton the second time.]]

** He also had a very, ''very'' limited moveset (mostly clotheslines, tackles, and simple slams) and often didn't execute them properly. Thus, matches were short to not "stink up the joint" (as [[Wrestling/TedDiBiase Ted [=DiBiase=]]] stated) and probably to limit the potentiality that he would injure his opponent through a poorly made slam.

* Annoyingly, this is how Melina won the Divas Championship from Jillian, cementing the latter's status as a joke as it happened in seconds after Jillian pulled an upset over Mickie James.

** The next evening, on ''WWE Raw'', Lesnar simply snickered and laughed as Wrestling/PaulHeyman touted The Conquerer as an unbeatable monster and dared anyone to step up and try to even hurt him slightly.

** It's just how WWE gets debuting (or re-debuting) giants over. It's happened with Ezekiel Jackson, Wrestling/VladimirKozlov and Wrestling/{{Sheamus}} recently. She'll be built up to goddess-like status, and then have some real matches.

* The most satisfying squash in recent memory was [[Wrestling/{{LayCool}} Michelle [=McCool=]]] versus Wrestling/MickieJames for the Women's Championship at the 2010 ''Royal Rumble''. Resident BitchInSheepsClothing [=McCool=] had been taunting poor Mickie for weeks about being "[[HollywoodPudgy fat]]" (calling her "Piggie James") and had her henchwomen [[BreakTheCutie douse Mickie with punch and smash her face into a heavily frosted cake, causing Mickie to burst into tears and run out of the arena]]. [=McCool=] kept ranting about how she had embarrassed James right out of WWE, and had her best friend Layla mock her by wearing a fat suit and a pig snout. At the ''Royal Rumble'', [=McCool=] came out first and flat-out announced to the crowd that her opponent was too scared to show up. She and Layla were still gloating when a familiar musical theme hit and....MICKIE JAMES made an appearance on WWE programming for the first time in weeks! [=McCool=]'s jaw was still on the floor from shock when James knocked her out and pinned her to win the title in ''less than half a minute''. Michelle and Layla then were humiliated by Mickie and her friends with a big messy cake to the face in a splendid little PayEvilUntoEvil moment ([[MoralDissonance although some fans did not like it]]).

* A more recent example; during the debut of Wrestling/{{Ryback}}, there would be several squash matches against local jobbers to build him up as a monster in a similar vein to Wrestling/{{Goldberg}}, so much that the fans started chanting the name of the WCW legend during his matches. He was also pushed for the WWE Championship within a few months of his debut. This promptly killed his undefeated streak.
* Most recently, [[Wrestling/AlexanderRusev Alexander Rusev]] has been like this since his January 2014 main roster debut.

Compare CurbStompBattle and TheWorfEffect. Not to be confused with the racket and ball sport known as squash, even if [[http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_753_the-20-most-amazing-people-youve-never-heard-of_p2/ Heather McKay did "squash" her competition for 19 years]].

* Wrestling/BrockLesnar squashed Wrestling/JohnCena ''clean'' at ''Summerslam 2014''. No successful comebacks, no turns of momentum, no CENAWINSLOL. Only the Ultimate Underdog and the face of the WWE getting demolished by the biggest overdog there is, the Beast who Broke the Streak.