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* ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia:'' Endeavor's redemption arc plays with this. On the one hand, Fuyumi accepts Endeavor's redemption and just wants the Todoroki family to be whole again, but Natsuo isn't as quick to forgive him and gives him a ReasonYouSuckSpeech. Shouto, who arguably suffered the most by his hands, takes the neutral ground. He doesn't quite forgive him for what he had done, but he acknowledges that he's trying to improve himself.

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* ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia:'' Endeavor's redemption arc plays with this. On the one hand, Fuyumi accepts Endeavor's redemption and just wants the Todoroki family to be whole again, but Natsuo isn't as quick to forgive him and gives him a ReasonYouSuckSpeech. Shouto, who arguably suffered the most by his hands, takes the neutral ground. He doesn't quite forgive him for what he had done, but he acknowledges that he's trying to improve himself. In the end, Endeavor [[spoiler:says that it's fine for his children to not forgive him, and arranges for them to live in a separate house, both for their safety and because he acknowledges that it would be best for him to remove himself from the picture]].



[[folder:Fan Works]]
*In ''Fanfic/NewHopeUniversityMajorInMurder'', Ashley openly recognizes that her father was abusive toward her, and even calls him a "fucker" and an "outright psychopath," but says he treated her that way because he saw her potential and believes it made her better than her classmates. [[TheProtagonist Saya]], who had a poor relationship with her own father, is flabbergasted by this attitude.
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* ''VideoGame/Persona5''is a huge deconstruction of ItCantBeHelped and depicts most of the main characters abused by the authority figures in their lives and how both of these tropes are often little more than excuses to let those in powers walk all over those around them.

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* ''VideoGame/Persona5''is ''VideoGame/Persona5'' is a huge deconstruction of ItCantBeHelped and depicts most of the main characters abused by the authority figures in their lives and how both of these tropes are often little more than excuses to let those in powers walk all over those around them.
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* Inverted in ''ComicBook/Batgirl2000'', where Cassandra Cain starts out genuinely loving her horrifically abusive father and not truly understanding how bad he was, but by the end of the book has come to despise him for how he treated her.
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* ''Manga/ShokugekiNoSoma'': Azami Nakiri submitted his daughter Erina to a TrainingFromHell to refine her God Tongue, which including verbally and physically abusing her, as well as isolating her from everyone else so she would have no friends or people to rely on. However, at the conclusion of the Central arc, upon seeing the reasons for his actions, Erina quietly thanks her father for everything he did for her sake and she apparently doesn't hold grudges against him.

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This is missing the point behind Persona 4's Social Links. 1)Yumi's father acknowledges that he's wrong, and Yumi herself comes to terms with her feelings of him. 2)Yukiko's family is not portrayed as abusive at all; she chooses to stay because she cares for her family and the staff. 3)It's hardly unreasonabe to say that Ms. Kashiwagi had problems of her own, or King Moron didn't deserve to be murdered. 4)Dojima was wrong, but making a bad decision in a difficult situation is hardly abuse.


* ''VideoGame/{{Persona 4}}'' was really bad with this. Three primary examples occur.
** Yumi is painted as in the wrong for not caring that her father, who abandoned her, is dying.
** The moral of Yukiko's Social Link is that she learns to accept that she has to run her family's Inn, despite her objections.
** Mr. Morooka was a JerkAss that insulted his students any chance he got, put the Protagonist on his "shit list" for calling him out, and slut-shamed Saki at her memorial. And yet, when [[spoiler: he dies, not only do his students mourn him, but they consider his replacement even worse]].
** While Ryotaro Dojima isn't the worst example of this, he never gets called out for neither his knee-jerk reaction to [[spoiler: getting sent a threatening letter by nearly disowning the Protagonist and having him sent to the station for questioning]], nor [[spoiler: leaving Nanako home alone, leaving her open to abduction]].
* The sequel ''VideoGame/Persona5'' however is the antithesis! As the game is a huge deconstruction of ItCantBeHelped and depicts most of the main characters abused by the authority figures in their lives and how both of these tropes are often little more than excuses to let those in powers walk all over those around them.

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* ''VideoGame/{{Persona 4}}'' was really bad with this. Three primary examples occur.
** Yumi is painted as in the wrong for not caring that her father, who abandoned her, is dying.
** The moral of Yukiko's Social Link is that she learns to accept that she has to run her family's Inn, despite her objections.
** Mr. Morooka was a JerkAss that insulted his students any chance he got, put the Protagonist on his "shit list" for calling him out, and slut-shamed Saki at her memorial. And yet, when [[spoiler: he dies, not only do his students mourn him, but they consider his replacement even worse]].
** While Ryotaro Dojima isn't the worst example of this, he never gets called out for neither his knee-jerk reaction to [[spoiler: getting sent a threatening letter by nearly disowning the Protagonist and having him sent to the station for questioning]], nor [[spoiler: leaving Nanako home alone, leaving her open to abduction]].
* The sequel ''VideoGame/Persona5'' however is the antithesis! As the game is
''VideoGame/Persona5''is a huge deconstruction of ItCantBeHelped and depicts most of the main characters abused by the authority figures in their lives and how both of these tropes are often little more than excuses to let those in powers walk all over those around them.
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'''Bob''': Oh, [[FreudianExcuse so that makes it okay for my dad to treat me bad]]? Feh, liberals.\\

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'''Bob''': Oh, [[FreudianExcuse [[FreudianExcuseIsNoExcuse so that makes it okay for my dad to treat me bad]]? Feh, liberals.\\
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* ''Manga/LoveHina:'' Despite all the years of Naru beating Keitaro to near-death for every minor infraction, he not only forgives her, but [[spoiler: marries her]]. To make matters worse, the series ends with Keitaro [[spoiler: accidentally ripping Naru's wedding dress]]. [[UnprovokedPervertPayback Three guesses what that leads to]].

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* ''Manga/LoveHina:'' Despite all the years of Naru beating Keitaro to near-death for every minor infraction, he not only forgives her, her but [[spoiler: marries her]]. To make matters worse, the series ends with Keitaro [[spoiler: accidentally ripping Naru's wedding dress]]. [[UnprovokedPervertPayback Three guesses what that leads to]].



* ''LightNovel/{{Durarara}}'' has a scene where Izumii's father breaks his nose for his room being set on fire, under the belief that he was smoking. However, Izumii entirely holds a grudge against Aoba, who set his room on fire just to get back at him for hitting him. The reason why Izumii hit Aoba in the first place was because he believes his parents favor and spoil him.

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* ''LightNovel/{{Durarara}}'' has a scene where Izumii's father breaks his nose for his room being set on fire, under the belief that he was smoking. However, Izumii entirely holds a grudge against Aoba, who set his room on fire just to get back at him for hitting him. The reason why Izumii hit Aoba in the first place was because that he believes his parents favor and spoil him.



** Tohru forgives [[spoiler: Akito]] for the various atrocities she committed against the Sohma clan, and most of other Sohmas either forgive her or have moved on to the point where they stopped caring. The only one that doesn't forgive her is Rin, but even she feels rotten for not being able to.

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** Tohru forgives [[spoiler: Akito]] for the various atrocities she committed against the Sohma clan, and most of the other Sohmas either forgive her or have moved on to the point where they stopped caring. The only one that doesn't forgive her is Rin, but even she feels rotten for not being able to.



* In ComicBook/TeenTitansEarthOne, Tara's mom is a verbally and physically abusive addict. Later, however, she is one of the few parents to care about and help her children, and shares a load of helpful exposition and advice in a tearful goodbye to Tara.
* Discussed and defied in ''ComicBook/{{Batwoman}}'': Detective Sawyer's father once locked her in a tool shed when she was a child because he was worried she was going to Hell for being so butch. After Sawyer broke her way out, her mother met her, crying, talking about how he did it out of love for her. Sawyer doesn't forgive him, and later says that she isn't a particularly forgiving person.

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* In ComicBook/TeenTitansEarthOne, Tara's mom is a verbally and physically abusive addict. Later, however, she is one of the few parents to care about and help her children, children and shares a load of helpful exposition and advice in a tearful goodbye to Tara.
* Discussed and defied in ''ComicBook/{{Batwoman}}'': Detective Sawyer's father once locked her in a tool shed when she was a child because he was worried she was going to Hell for being so butch. After Sawyer broke her way out, her mother met her, crying, talking about how he did it out of love for her. Sawyer doesn't forgive him, him and later says that she isn't a particularly forgiving person.



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** Mr. Morooka was a JerkAss that insulted his students any chance he got, put the Protagonist on his "shit list" for calling him out, and slut shamed Saki at her memorial. And yet, when [[spoiler: he dies, not only do his students mourn him, but they consider his replacement even worse]].

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** Mr. Morooka was a JerkAss that insulted his students any chance he got, put the Protagonist on his "shit list" for calling him out, and slut shamed slut-shamed Saki at her memorial. And yet, when [[spoiler: he dies, not only do his students mourn him, but they consider his replacement even worse]].



* ''VideoGame/NierAutomata:'' There's a sidequest where 2B and 9S have to retrieve a machine that ran away from home after an argument with his mother. The machine is painted as a BrattyHalfPint for running off even though the reason he did so was because his mother favored his older brother, blamed him for something that was his younger sibling's fault, and [[UsefulNotes/VictimBlaming blamed him when his older brother hit him]].

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* ''VideoGame/NierAutomata:'' There's a sidequest where 2B and 9S have to retrieve a machine that ran away from home after an argument with his mother. The machine is painted as a BrattyHalfPint for running off even though the reason he did so was because that his mother favored his older brother, blamed him for something that was his younger sibling's fault, and [[UsefulNotes/VictimBlaming blamed him when his older brother hit him]].

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* The abuser believes MiseryBuildsCharacter.

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* The abuser believes MiseryBuildsCharacter.MiseryBuildsCharacter or that it was ToughLove.


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* ''Manga/DetectiveConan'': Heizo Hattori's actions during the Tiger Scroll Murder Case are this. When Heiji gets a little too careless during the investigation, he punches and belittles him. It is then later revealed that it was all a BatmanGambit to enrage Heiji enough to act as bait for the culprit, which could have very well killed him if there were a SpannerInTheWorks. His actions are in no way considered reprehensible by the cast, and even his underlings in the Osaka Police Department considered it an act of ToughLove.
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* ''Series/ShamelessUS'' deconstructs this trope. Frank neglects Debbie, Carl, and Liam, emotionally abuses Fiona and Lip, and physically abuses Ian. Whenever the Gallagher children give him another chance, it always blows up in their faces.
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* ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia:'' Endeavor's redemption arc plays with this. On the one hand, Fuyumi accepts Endeavor's redemption and just wants the Todoroki family to be whole again, but Natsuo isn't as quick to forgive him and gives him a ReasonYouSuckSpeech. Shouto, who arguably suffered the most by his hands, takes the neutral ground. He doesn't quite forgive him for what he had done, but he acknowledges that he's trying to improve himself.
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Deleted when crosswicked


* ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia:'' How some people view Shoto's relationship with his parents. Despite his mother throwing boiling water on him when he was five, Shoto focuses all of his anger on his father. While Endeavor is no saint and can be blamed for his mother's mental breakdown, some are baffled that Shoto holds no resentment for his mother.
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* ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia:'' How some people view Shouto's relationship with his parents. Despite his mother throwing boiling water on him when he was five, Shouto focuses all of his anger on his father. While Endeavor is no saint and can be blamed for his mother's mental breakdown, some are baffled that Shouto holds no resentment for his mother.

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* ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia:'' How some people view Shouto's Shoto's relationship with his parents. Despite his mother throwing boiling water on him when he was five, Shouto Shoto focuses all of his anger on his father. While Endeavor is no saint and can be blamed for his mother's mental breakdown, some are baffled that Shouto Shoto holds no resentment for his mother.
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How To Write An Example - Do Not Pothole the Trope Name


** Kyo attempts this with his father near the end. His father regularly blamed him for the suicide of his mother, but it's heavily implied that he was a DomesticAbuser that drove her to do it. When Kyo tried to make amends with him, he wouldn't stop hurling insults at him. Kyo finally realizes that his father is a lost cause and cuts him from his life.

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** Kyo attempts this with his father near the end. His father regularly blamed him for the suicide of his mother, but it's heavily implied that he was a DomesticAbuser {{Domestic Abuse}}r that drove her to do it. When Kyo tried to make amends with him, he wouldn't stop hurling insults at him. Kyo finally realizes that his father is a lost cause and cuts him from his life.
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* Handled rather maturely in ''WesternAnimation/GodTheDevilAndBob'', as Bob's father passes away, having always been an unrepentant JerkAss with his son, and Bob is disturbed to learn that he actually went to ''Heaven'' instead of Hell. At the end of the episode, God and Bob play a round of pool.

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* Handled rather maturely in ''WesternAnimation/GodTheDevilAndBob'', as Bob's father passes away, having always been an unrepentant JerkAss with his son, and Bob is disturbed to learn that he actually went to ''Heaven'' instead of Hell. At the end of the episode, God and Bob play a round of pool.



'''God''': Now ''he'' was a scary guy.\\

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'''God''': Now ''he'' [[TroubledAbuser was a scary guy.guy]].\\
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* Handled rather maturely in ''WesternAnimation/GodTheDevilAndBob'', as Bob's father passes away, having always been an unrepentant JerkAss with his son, and Bob is disturbed to learn that he actually went to ''Heaven'' instead of Hell. At the end of the episode, God and Bob play a round of pool.

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* Handled rather maturely in ''WesternAnimation/GodTheDevilAndBob'', as Bob's father passes away, having always been an unrepentant JerkAss with his son, and Bob is disturbed to learn that he actually went to ''Heaven'' instead of Hell. At the end of the episode, God and Bob play a round of pool.



'''God''': [[JerkassHasAPoint You're right]]. And you're right to be mad at him. [[GodIsGood But it's not your job to forgive him]], it's mine... Did you know your grandfather?\\

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'''God''': [[JerkassHasAPoint You're right]]. And you're right to be mad at him. [[GodIsGood But it's not your job to forgive him]], him, [[GodIsGood it's mine...mine]]... Did you know your grandfather?\\
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* Handled rather maturely in ''WesternAnimation/GodTheDevilAndBob'', as Bob's father passes away, having always been an unrepentant JerkAss with his son, and Bob is disturbed to learn that he actually went to ''Heaven'' instead of Hell. At the end of the episode, God and Bob play a round of pool.
-->'''God''': Look, I know your father [[AbusiveParents was a jerk to ya]], but you don't know what was in his ''[[JerkWithAHeartOfGold heart]]''.\\
'''Bob''': Don't do this, [[ShutUpKirk don't gimme that crap]], I don't care ''what'' was in his heart - [[JerkWithAHeartOfJerk he never shared it with me]].\\
'''God''': [[JerkassHasAPoint You're right]]. And you're right to be mad at him. [[GodIsGood But it's not your job to forgive him]], it's mine... Did you know your grandfather?\\
'''Bob''': What? No. He never talked about him.\\
'''God''': Now ''he'' was a scary guy.\\
'''Bob''': Oh, [[FreudianExcuse so that makes it okay for my dad to treat me bad]]? Feh, liberals.\\
'''God''': No, that's not what I'm saying. Look Bob... okay, picture this long line of fathers and sons stretching from Adam all the way down to Andy. Now, [[TheChainOfHarm they're all passing down this punch]], [[SinsOfOurFathers from one generation to the next, father to son]], and the trick is to pass on a softer punch. [[ParentsAsPeople Your father passed on a softer punch]].
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* In fantasy stories, their actions were a JerkassFacade as part of a BatmanGambit to lead the hero in the right direction.

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* In fantasy stories, their actions were a JerkassFacade just an act as part of a BatmanGambit to lead the hero in the right direction.



** It turns out some of Snape's actions were all [[spoiler: a JerkassFacade to help Harry kill Voldemort]]. While [[spoiler: killing Dumbledore made sense since he was dying anyway and it was an assisted suicide]], that doesn't justify his years of bullying Gryffindors because of a childhood grudge. Harry (after years of spitting at his name) forgives him and gives him some respect and even [[spoiler: names one of his children after him all the while still seeing him as flawed and wrong about lots of things]].

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** It turns out some of Snape's actions were all [[spoiler: a JerkassFacade "jerkass act" to help Harry kill Voldemort]]. While [[spoiler: killing Dumbledore made sense since he was dying anyway and it was an assisted suicide]], that doesn't justify his years of bullying Gryffindors because of a childhood grudge. Harry (after years of spitting at his name) forgives him and gives him some respect and even [[spoiler: names one of his children after him all the while still seeing him as flawed and wrong about lots of things]].
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** It turns out some of Snape's actions were all [[spoiler: a JerkassFacade to help Harry kill Voldemort]]. While [[spoiler: killing Dumbledore made sense since he was dying anyway and it was an assisted suicide]], that doesn't justify his years of bullying Gryffindors because of a childhood grudge. Harry (after years of spitting at his name) forgives him and even [[spoiler: names one of his children after him]].

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** It turns out some of Snape's actions were all [[spoiler: a JerkassFacade to help Harry kill Voldemort]]. While [[spoiler: killing Dumbledore made sense since he was dying anyway and it was an assisted suicide]], that doesn't justify his years of bullying Gryffindors because of a childhood grudge. Harry (after years of spitting at his name) forgives him and gives him some respect and even [[spoiler: names one of his children after him]].him all the while still seeing him as flawed and wrong about lots of things]].
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** When Ron returns from his departure in ''Deathly Hallows,'' Hermione beats the crap out of him. Even though his actions were partially under the influence of a Horcrux, Ron thinks he deserves it and tries to win Hermione back. This was thankfully removed from the movie. Hermione instead verbally chastises him, and Ron has a DudeWheresMyRespect response.

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** An individual in-the-heat-of-the-moment violent episode happens with the most tense couple in the series. When Ron returns from his departure in ''Deathly Hallows,'' Hermione beats the crap out of him. Even though his actions were partially under the influence of a Horcrux, Hermione was so heartbroken and over this that she refuses to cut him any slack and Ron on his part thinks he deserves it and tries to win Hermione her back. This was thankfully removed from the movie. Hermione instead verbally chastises him, and Ron has a DudeWheresMyRespect response.

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* The ''Literature/HarryPotter'' books have a problem with this.
** It is revealed that one of the reasons Dumbledore let Harry live with the Dursleys despite their abuse is that he believes an abusive upbringing will make him more humble and willing to sacrifice himself.
** When Ron returns from his departure in ''Deathly Hallows,'' Hermione beats the crap out of him. The kicker? Even though his actions were under the influence of a Horcrux, Ron thinks he deserves it and tries to win Hermione back. This was thankfully removed from the movie. Hermione instead verbally chastises him, and Ron has a DudeWheresMyRespect response.
** It turns out Snape's actions were all [[spoiler: a JerkassFacade to help Harry kill Voldemort]]. While you can justify him [[spoiler: killing Dumbledore to some extent since he was dying anyway and it was an assisted suicide]], that doesn't justify his years of bullying Gryffindors because of a petty childhood grudge. Harry easily forgives him and even [[spoiler: names one of his children after him]].

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* The * ''Literature/HarryPotter'' books have a problem Subverted with this.
** It is revealed
Albus Dumbledore. He claims to Mc Gonagall at the very start of the story that one of the reasons Dumbledore that he will let Harry live with the Dursleys despite their abuse is that he believes an abusive upbringing it will make him more humble and willing to sacrifice himself.
himself. The thing is that 1) how abusive this household turned out to be wasn't even something that he could have expected and 2) it turns out [[spoiler: that this was just an excuse and the real reason lied behind the belief that Harry would never be safe in the magical world as there were agents of the Dark Lord everywhere.]]
** When Ron returns from his departure in ''Deathly Hallows,'' Hermione beats the crap out of him. The kicker? Even though his actions were partially under the influence of a Horcrux, Ron thinks he deserves it and tries to win Hermione back. This was thankfully removed from the movie. Hermione instead verbally chastises him, and Ron has a DudeWheresMyRespect response.
** It turns out some of Snape's actions were all [[spoiler: a JerkassFacade to help Harry kill Voldemort]]. While you can justify him [[spoiler: killing Dumbledore to some extent made sense since he was dying anyway and it was an assisted suicide]], that doesn't justify his years of bullying Gryffindors because of a petty childhood grudge. Harry easily (after years of spitting at his name) forgives him and even [[spoiler: names one of his children after him]].
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* ''VideoGame/NierAutomata:'' There's a sidequest where 2B and 9S have to retrieve a machine that ran away from home after an argument with his mother. The machine is painted as a BrattyHalfPint for running off even though the reason he did so was because his mother favored his older brother, blamed him for something that was his younger sibling's fault, and [[VictimBlaming blamed him when his older brother hit him]].

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* ''VideoGame/NierAutomata:'' There's a sidequest where 2B and 9S have to retrieve a machine that ran away from home after an argument with his mother. The machine is painted as a BrattyHalfPint for running off even though the reason he did so was because his mother favored his older brother, blamed him for something that was his younger sibling's fault, and [[VictimBlaming [[UsefulNotes/VictimBlaming blamed him when his older brother hit him]].
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* The sequel ''VideoGame/Persona5'' however is the antithesis! As the game is a huge deconstruction of ItCantBeHelped and depicts most of the main characters abused by the authority figures in their lives and how both of these tropes are often little more than excuses to let those in powers walk all over those around them.
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[[/folder]]

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[[/folder]][[/folder]]
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Now this is just Ron The Death Eater.


* ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'': Marge is repeatedly shown to be just as abusive as Homer. Just like him she quickly gave up on Bart when it was clear he was having trouble in kindergarden. In fact as the series when on she was the more likely of the two to give up on him when put in the same situation (such as learning to discipline him). She’s also more prone to tell him that he will be a FutureLoser. Her ParentalFavoritism also reaches the point of sadism as she’s not only convinced Bart to give up something he loved and made him a better person, but also stay crippled because Lisa couldn’t handle the fact that he was a better musician and him continuing to be so somehow be cruel. She then twice turned around forced him to play instruments he didn’t want to. She’s even kicked him out of the house because he didn’t take her side in an argument. However because she’s not physically violent or overtly negative Bart is MommasBoy.
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* ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'': Marge is repeatedly shown to be just as abusive as Homer. Just like him she quickly gave up on Bart when it was clear he was having trouble in kindergarden. In fact as the series when on she was the more likely of the two to give up on him when put in the same situation (such as learning to discipline him). She’s also more prone to tell him that he will be a FutureLoser. Her ParentalFavoritism also reaches the point of sadism as she’s not only convinced Bart to give up something he loved and made him a better person, but also stay crippled because Lisa couldn’t handle the fact that he was a better musician and him continuing to be so somehow be cruel. She then twice turned around forced him to play instruments he didn’t want to. She’s even kicked him out of the house because he didn’t take her side in an argument. However because she’s not physically violent or overtly negative Bart is MommasBoy.

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* ''Manga/FruitsBasket:'' Tohru forgives [[spoiler: Akito]] for the various atrocities she committed against the Sohma clan, and most of other Sohmas either forgive her or have moved on to the point where they stopped caring. The only one that doesn't forgive her is Rin, but even she feels rotten for not being able to.

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* ''Manga/FruitsBasket:'' ''Manga/FruitsBasket:''
**
Tohru forgives [[spoiler: Akito]] for the various atrocities she committed against the Sohma clan, and most of other Sohmas either forgive her or have moved on to the point where they stopped caring. The only one that doesn't forgive her is Rin, but even she feels rotten for not being able to.to.
** Kyo attempts this with his father near the end. His father regularly blamed him for the suicide of his mother, but it's heavily implied that he was a DomesticAbuser that drove her to do it. When Kyo tried to make amends with him, he wouldn't stop hurling insults at him. Kyo finally realizes that his father is a lost cause and cuts him from his life.


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** Mr. Morooka was a JerkAss that insulted his students any chance he got, put the Protagonist on his "shit list" for calling him out, and slut shamed Saki at her memorial. And yet, when [[spoiler: he dies, not only do his students mourn him, but they consider his replacement even worse]].
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[[folder:Webcomics]]
* Invoked in ''Webcomic/KeychainOfCreation'' when Marena forces herself to forgive her mother of the [[http://keychain.patternspider.net/archive/koc0317.html many abuses]] she inflicted in the name of preparing her for life in the royal court. By the end of the ListOfTransgressions, Marena admits that her mother's ManipulativeBastard tendencies come from having to go to incredible lengths to reach her current status.
-->''"And I forgive my mother for... for... For making me respect her anyway. ...She started off in a worse place than I did. I have to."''
[[/folder]]
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* In the 2017 series of ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}, Dr. Hayes performed genetic-engineering experiments on her children, encouraged them to have sex with each other in the hopes of producing a super-powered grandchild, performed medically-unnecessary tests on her granddaughter, and attempted to harvest genetic material from the Runaways without their knowledge or consent. In spite of this, the series treats her sympathetically because her children are dead (never mind that those children grew up to be supervillains who died during a failed attempt to bring about the end of the world), and the Runaways elect not to harm her despite her enthusiastic efforts to kill them.

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* In the 2017 series of ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}, ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}'', Dr. Hayes performed genetic-engineering experiments on her children, encouraged them to have sex with each other in the hopes of producing a super-powered grandchild, performed medically-unnecessary tests on her granddaughter, and attempted to harvest genetic material from the Runaways without their knowledge or consent. In spite of this, the series treats her sympathetically because her children are dead (never mind that those children grew up to be supervillains who died during a failed attempt to bring about the end of the world), and the Runaways elect not to harm her despite her enthusiastic efforts to kill them.
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* ''Manga/JojosBizarreAdventure:'' George Joestar never gets reprimanded for constantly berating Jonathan and acting oblivious to Dio's bullying towards him. Instead, he tells him [[spoiler: in his dying words]] that he acted that way to make Jonathan a better person. Though, considering it took place in the 19th Century, it could be DeliberateValuesDissonance.
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Sometimes, abusers or bullies are depicted as the worst kind of scum. Usually, their victim is justified in their dislike for them. However, there are times when the victim not only is wrong for their resentment, but they eventually learn to forgive and respect them.

Causes of this include:

* The abuser [[TroubledAbuser being]] [[FreudianExcuse abused themselves]].
* The abuser believes MiseryBuildsCharacter.
* The abuser legitimately reformed and is trying to be TheAtoner.
* In fantasy stories, their actions were a JerkassFacade as part of a BatmanGambit to lead the hero in the right direction.
* A severe case of ValuesDissonance (a lot of Japanese media will be on this page).

A sub-page of FamilyUnfriendlyAesop. Compare TroubledAbuser, InformedWrongness, and TheComplainerIsAlwaysWrong.

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!!Examples:

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Anime and Manga]]
* ''Manga/AssassinationClassroom'' reveals that Nagisa's mother was horribly abusive towards him. However, their subplot ends with Nagisa forgiving her and her being a KarmaHoudini.
* ''Manga/LoveHina:'' Despite all the years of Naru beating Keitaro to near-death for every minor infraction, he not only forgives her, but [[spoiler: marries her]]. To make matters worse, the series ends with Keitaro [[spoiler: accidentally ripping Naru's wedding dress]]. [[UnprovokedPervertPayback Three guesses what that leads to]].
* ''Franchise/{{Naruto}}''
** In [[Manga/{{Naruto}} the manga itself]], Shikamaru questions why his dad married his overbearing mother, and Shikaku's answer is that mothers are supposed to be hardasses. He takes this advice to heart and [[spoiler: marries Temari]], who subjects him and [[spoiler: his son, Shikadai]] to some abuse that's PlayedForLaughs.
** The alternate universe in ''Anime/NarutoTheMovieRoadToNinja'' Flanderizes Kushina's HairTriggerTemper into physical and emotional abuse. However, Naruto learns to accept this reality over time.
* ''LightNovel/{{Durarara}}'' has a scene where Izumii's father breaks his nose for his room being set on fire, under the belief that he was smoking. However, Izumii entirely holds a grudge against Aoba, who set his room on fire just to get back at him for hitting him. The reason why Izumii hit Aoba in the first place was because he believes his parents favor and spoil him.
* ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia:'' How some people view Shouto's relationship with his parents. Despite his mother throwing boiling water on him when he was five, Shouto focuses all of his anger on his father. While Endeavor is no saint and can be blamed for his mother's mental breakdown, some are baffled that Shouto holds no resentment for his mother.
* ''Manga/FruitsBasket:'' Tohru forgives [[spoiler: Akito]] for the various atrocities she committed against the Sohma clan, and most of other Sohmas either forgive her or have moved on to the point where they stopped caring. The only one that doesn't forgive her is Rin, but even she feels rotten for not being able to.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Comic Book]]
* In ComicBook/TeenTitansEarthOne, Tara's mom is a verbally and physically abusive addict. Later, however, she is one of the few parents to care about and help her children, and shares a load of helpful exposition and advice in a tearful goodbye to Tara.
* Discussed and defied in ''ComicBook/{{Batwoman}}'': Detective Sawyer's father once locked her in a tool shed when she was a child because he was worried she was going to Hell for being so butch. After Sawyer broke her way out, her mother met her, crying, talking about how he did it out of love for her. Sawyer doesn't forgive him, and later says that she isn't a particularly forgiving person.
* In ''ComicBook/{{Deathstroke}},'' Rose and Joey often leave their father and try to establish their own civilian lives, only to return to Slade's side (usually after Slade has whoever they were forming a life with murdered).
* In the 2017 series of ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}, Dr. Hayes performed genetic-engineering experiments on her children, encouraged them to have sex with each other in the hopes of producing a super-powered grandchild, performed medically-unnecessary tests on her granddaughter, and attempted to harvest genetic material from the Runaways without their knowledge or consent. In spite of this, the series treats her sympathetically because her children are dead (never mind that those children grew up to be supervillains who died during a failed attempt to bring about the end of the world), and the Runaways elect not to harm her despite her enthusiastic efforts to kill them.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Film]]
* ''Film/TheKid2000:'' Russ is seen as the bad guy for trying to cut his abusive father from his life.
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[[folder:Literature]]
* The ''Literature/HarryPotter'' books have a problem with this.
** It is revealed that one of the reasons Dumbledore let Harry live with the Dursleys despite their abuse is that he believes an abusive upbringing will make him more humble and willing to sacrifice himself.
** When Ron returns from his departure in ''Deathly Hallows,'' Hermione beats the crap out of him. The kicker? Even though his actions were under the influence of a Horcrux, Ron thinks he deserves it and tries to win Hermione back. This was thankfully removed from the movie. Hermione instead verbally chastises him, and Ron has a DudeWheresMyRespect response.
** It turns out Snape's actions were all [[spoiler: a JerkassFacade to help Harry kill Voldemort]]. While you can justify him [[spoiler: killing Dumbledore to some extent since he was dying anyway and it was an assisted suicide]], that doesn't justify his years of bullying Gryffindors because of a petty childhood grudge. Harry easily forgives him and even [[spoiler: names one of his children after him]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Video Games]]
* ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyX'': Tidus harbors resentment towards Jecht because he often verbally abused him (in particular, always calling him a "[[CatchphraseInsult crybaby]]"). However, the game later reveals that it was all a [[spoiler: BatmanGambit to give Tidus the motivation to kill him as Sin]].
* ''VideoGame/{{Persona 4}}'' was really bad with this. Three primary examples occur.
** Yumi is painted as in the wrong for not caring that her father, who abandoned her, is dying.
** The moral of Yukiko's Social Link is that she learns to accept that she has to run her family's Inn, despite her objections.
** While Ryotaro Dojima isn't the worst example of this, he never gets called out for neither his knee-jerk reaction to [[spoiler: getting sent a threatening letter by nearly disowning the Protagonist and having him sent to the station for questioning]], nor [[spoiler: leaving Nanako home alone, leaving her open to abduction]].
* ''VideoGame/NierAutomata:'' There's a sidequest where 2B and 9S have to retrieve a machine that ran away from home after an argument with his mother. The machine is painted as a BrattyHalfPint for running off even though the reason he did so was because his mother favored his older brother, blamed him for something that was his younger sibling's fault, and [[VictimBlaming blamed him when his older brother hit him]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Western Animation]]
* ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'': "Seahorse Seashell Party" has Meg give her family a big ReasonYouSuckSpeech after one act of abuse too many. This leads to them going at each other's throats. Meg learns that her abuse was the only thing keeping her family from falling apart, so she decides to continue putting up with them.
* ''WesternAnimation/RickAndMorty:'' Bird Person advises Morty to keep indulging Rick's sociopathic behavior because he suffers from serious depression.
* ''WesternAnimation/HeyArnold:'' In the Thanksgiving special, Helga is painted as an ungrateful brat for not being thankful for anything. The episode ends with her learning to be thankful for her family, even though throughout the series, Bob ignores Helga and puts Olga on a pedestal and Miriam is a G-Rated alcoholic that often neglects her.
[[/folder]]

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