History Funny / WWE

** "1...2.... IT DOESN'T MATTER IF THE ROCK COUNTS TO 3!!!!" (found at about 6:55 of [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6Ct9F57sfU&feature=related this video]])

** cNow with 35% [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXDhoP-A4h4 MORE ASS]]!

'''Santino''': Have you tried the Pepsi machine?

* JohnCena is [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kdgo8AeQ8nQ&feature=related interviewed by Maria in 2006]]. VinceMcMahon is running Raw from a cell phone because his first grandchild has just been born, and the assorted chaos that has ensued means Cena's just about had enough. After [[DistractedByTheSexy hitting on Maria]] (and [[DumbBlonde asking if she ate paint chips when she was a kid), he goes off on how {{Edge}} is "rated PG-13", RandyOrton's been hitting on Brooke Hogan, and how [[MostAnnoyingSound Armando Estrada]] should "park [his] ass and shut [his] piehole".

---> '''Cena''': I'm gonna do something I should have done a long time ago. *runs over to a fan in the front row and hugs him* It's cool, me and the anti-Cena guy hugged it out!

'''Cody Rhodes''': Don't breath on me. ''[Exit]''\\

'''DustyRhodes''': [[PaintingTheFourthWall Man, I raised some weird kids]]...

* The first 3/4ths of John Cena's return promo on the 12.20 Raw (until the needless Vicki Guererro bashing). Specifically this bit:
--> '''Cena''': I'm gonna do something I should have done a long time ago. *runs over to a fan in the front row and hugs him* It's cool, me and the anti-Cena guy hugged it out!

* * [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GaJhxbegaZs "I like your poetry."]] [[DeadBabyComedy "I like what you do to babies."]]

* The Public Enemy had some great ones including a wcw moment I wish I could find online that had the line "You've got Ric Flair flopping around the ring like he's having an epileptic seizure." complete with pantomimed Flair-flops... it was much funnier then it sounds. Then from ECW this classic [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OD0G-79Yhuc&feature=related of the P.E. training Mikey Whipwreck to take on the Sandman.]]

''(JohnMorrison [[FacePalm hangs his head and covers his face with his clipboard)''\\

''({{Beat}))''\\

'''TripleH''': ''(off-screen)'' Yeah, he's still in a coma; in fact, he's probably brain-dead.\\

* '''November 1, 2010''', A segment that night on consisted of a sketch revealing before commercial break that Mr. [=McMahon=] has been in a coma for two months. His doctor (played by Freddie Prinze Jr.) casually mentions that it will be a shame that Mr [=McMahon=] will miss the entire election when his wife Linda spent $50 million on the campaign. Mr. [=McMahon=] is wrestled awake by this news, covered in his wife's campaign stickers, and finally says that it's okay as long as the WWE is running smoothly. The doctor proceeds to list everything that's been going WRONG (Undertaker buried, NEXUS running wild, Pee Wee Herman hosting, etc.) and Mr. [=McMahon=] gets up to leave the room, saying if his wife can run for Senate, he can run for PRESIDENT, exiting to reveal his backside covered by a banner of his wife's opponent. Cut to his daughter Stephanie awaking in bed, Newhart style, and saying she just had the most horrible dream, asking her husband, Triple H, if her dad is awake. Triple H, from off-screen, replies "of course not, he's still in a coma, and he probably has brain damage." Stephanie, strangely pleased with this, goes back to bed.

--> '''Triple H''': (looks smug as hell) Heh. [[HappilyMarried See ya at home, Steph]]!

** [[FridgeLogic Wait, his CMOF is mocking the much beloved Jim Ross]] [[ReplacementScrappy and bragging about being]] [[TheWesley the most hated commentator in wrestling?]]