History Funny / MenAtArms

* Carrot and Vetinari talking about all the chaos and ruffled feathers a man like Vimes would cause among the upper classes if promoted to commander of the City Watch in addition to his own sense of awkwardness. Then the both have to stop because their breaking out wicked smiles. Just try to picture [[TheComicallySerious Vetinari]] and [[IncorruptiblePurePureness Carrot]] smiling wickedly about Vimes without feeling some amusement.

* Vimes declares the Watch is clearly dealing with a criminal mind. After a moment, he has to clarify to Carrot he ''doesn't'' mean Nobby.

'''Carrot:''' So if you could perhaps run along and tell Dr Whiteface that we've got an iron ball with spi- What am I saying? I mean, without an appointment to see him? Please? Thank you.

* TheReveal of Big Fido, the fierce Hitler-esque leader of the Dogs Guild, [[spoiler:as a small fluffy poodle who knows next to nothing about how wolves really are.]]
* The [[RunningGag lengthy discussion]] about just ''what'' it is they say about dwarfs. When the answer turns out to be that [[spoiler:they're well-endowed]] and just as you think the joke is that Cuddy misinterprets it as meaning "They have loads of gold," it's turned completely inside-out by the ''real'' punchline:

-->'''Cuddy:''' [[spoiler:We just tell it that to get it into bed.]]

* Death's [[spoiler:visit with Big Fido]]. Also qualifies as a SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome
-->'''Death:''' [[spoiler:[[AC:Big Fido?]]]]
-->[[spoiler:'''Big Fido:''' Yes?]]
-->'''Death:''' [[spoiler:[[AC:Heel.]]]]

'''Carrot:''' Yes. An appointment is an engagement between to see someone, while a morningstar is a large lump of metal used for viciously crushing skulls. It's important not to confuse the two, isn't it, Mr- ?\\

--> '''Cuddy:''' It can if it wants to.

* The ''other'' RunningGag of people asking Cuddy [[AskAStupidQuestion if he's a dwarf]]. "Are you a giant?"

--> '''Detritus:''' You all stupid!

* Carrot and Vetinari talking about all the chaos and ruffled feathers a man like Vimes would cause among the upper classes if promoted to commander of the City Watch. Then the both have to stop because their breaking out wicked smiles. Just try to picture [[TheComicallySerious Vetinari]] and [[IncorruptiblePurePureness Carrot]] smiling wickedly about Vimes without feeling some amusement.

* Carrot and Vetinari talking about all the chaos and ruffled feathers a fan like Vimes would cause among the upper classes if promoted to commander of the City Watch. Then the both have to stop because their breaking outnwicked smiles. Just try to picture [[TheComicallySerious Vetinari]] and [[IncorruptiblePurePureness Carrot]] smiling wickedly about Vimes without feeling some amusement.

* Cuddy, Carrot, The Librarian, and Detritus all find themselves underground. All except Detritus decide to have a sing-along...of [[Disney/SnowWhiteandTheSevenDwarfs the Hi-Ho song]].

--> '''Detritus:''' [[DarthWiki/MostAnnoyingSound You all stupid!]]

--> '''Detritus:''' [[MostAnnoyingSound You all stupid!]]

** And the footnote about the Fire Engine being banned in eight countries and three religions, while five more religions embrace it as a holy weapon to be used on infidels, heretics, gnostics, and people who fidget during sermons.

--> This is very moving’ said Boffo. On a dais at the opposite side of the quadrangle was a fat clown in baggy trousers, huge braces, a bow tie that was spinning gently in the breeze and a top hat. His face had been painted into a picture of misery. He held a bladder on a stick. The clown with the urn reached the dais, climbed the steps, and waited. The band fell silent. The clown in the top hat hit the urn-carrier about the head with the bladder – once, twice, three times… The urn-bearer stepped forward, waggled his wig, took the urn in one hand and the clown’s belt in the other and, with great solemnity, poured the ashes of the late Brother Beano into the other clown’s trousers.

A sigh went up from the audience…’Classic’ [Boffo] said. ‘It’s what he would have wanted.'

--> '''the Librarian:''' Oook oook oook oook ook—