History Funny / FinalFantasyXIV

* Once Leviathan has been defeated Thancred can be seen at the counter of The Rising Stones with a bottle of alcohol in his hand spilling his guts to F'lhaminn, who he's been crushing on ever since she resurfaced in 2.1. Topics include the first time he ever saw her, how pretty he is, and how he's been pretty crazy for her ever since. She seems flattered enough but decides it's time he stops drinking.

* Retainer Ventures can end up being NoodleIncidents.

* Patch 2.2 gave us someone even more over the top than Hildibrand: [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbEan62z8RA His father, Godbert.]]

* Retainer Ventures can end up being NoodleIncidents.

** The fight against Gilgamesh is also beyond silly; as a nod to his character, Gilgamesh will fake defeat halfway through the first round and then says he lied, proceeding to attack one random player as he buffs himself. Gilgamesh then runs away, saying he "remembered he had something to do" while he drops a bomb behind as another ambush attack. Gilgamesh also can cause Minimum, Toad, and Confusion, which makes the fight look even sillier as shrunk down and frog transformed party members are running around trying to avoid being hit while confused party members attack each other.

* Hildibrand returns in usual fashion, digging himself out of his own grave, convinced he's a zombie because of his amnesia. His quest chain is silly, nonsensical, and ends in a way that might leave you flabbergasted by how crazy it is. At one point, Hildibrand makes a joyful face that stretches his model so much it's very obviously meant to push the UncannyValley.
* Gilgamesh's exit after his boss battle leaves the PC so flabbergasted they forget to preform their victory pose with the rest of the party.

* Hildibrand returns in usual fashion, digging himself out of his own grave, convinced he's a zombie because of his amnesia. His quest chain is silly, nonsensical, and ends in a way that might leave you flabbergasted by how crazy it is. At one point, Hildibrand makes a joyful face that stretches his model so much it's very obviously meant to push the UncannyValley.

* [[DestructiveSaviour Shantotto]] is specifically compared to The Calamity, in terms of danger to Eorzea. Shantotto is also slightly smaller than a typical Lalafell. And then she brings out Five V... and a rhyme.

* The opening wagon-ride into Gridania in ''A Realm Reborn'' has the player seeing some Moogles (in this universe, they appear only to select people), who greet you with adorable horn-toots that only you can hear, and then while talking, [[BottleFairy one downs the drink of another passenger on the wagon]].

* [[spoiler:Biggs and Wedge]] make an apppearance when you join a Grand Company in ''ARR''. [[spoiler:Their comedy duo nature is enhanced even further by them being a Roegadyn and a Lalafell.]]
** Later in the story: [[spoiler:You hijack a magitech armor. In order to pilot it, the Lalafell is picked up by the Roegadyn, flung around 15 feet into the air, does a flip in the air, and lands in the pilot seat]]

* During the weaver quests, the quest to learn to socket [[AppliedPhlebotinum materia]] involves an aristocrat who has decided to take up gladiatorial combat. In order to "release his martial potential", he has you craft a cotton akton. However, it musn't be any old akton like the peasants wear, it must be materia enhanced. When the guildmaster hears the request, he suggests you put in any old piece of materia, as the client likely won't be able to tell the difference.
** After completing the request, the guildmaster informs you of an important fact about being a weavere: "While we are not required to respect our clients, we must appear to be respecting their wishes." Furthermore, he declares that you did an excellent job, since "as that little turd was sauntering out of here, I almost mistook him for a gladiator".

* Later, when you actually find one of the actual ex-members of the Band of Heroes, ''they'' want to [[HiddenPurposeTest test you]], too. They've got a better reason, since challenging Titan just gives the Primal more prayer fuel, but the whole god about to attack Limsa Limosa thing is a bit pressing. Y'shtola's reaction echos the player's.

* The DragonQuestX crossover storyline referenced the DragonQuest [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything "Puff-Puff"]] RunningGag as your character's 'reward' for completing it. As usual, your character is asked to close his/her eyes as they give you your 'reward'. At the end of it, you open your eyes to catch a face full of a furry/feathery creature being held by the ladies.

-->'''Wyrnzoen''': You did well to to topple [[ButHeSoundsHandsome opponents of such formidable skill.]] But let us not dwell on the nature of those masked men. What is important is your triumph in the face of overwhelming odds.

* The Scions of the Seventh Dawn (nee the Circle of Knowing) have a sort of clerk/receptionist who watches the front of their pad in Vesper Bay. She's a Lalafell... named [[FinalFantasyXI Tataru]]. And she even does the "taru panic" during one particular cutscene.

*** Even better, he thinks it's [[FinalFantasyX Tidus]].

-->'''Wyrnzoen''': You did well to to topple [[ButHeSoundsHandsome opponents of such formidable skill.]] But let us not dwell on the nature of those masked men. What is important is your triumph in the face of overwhelming odds.

** [[spoiler: I meant the Sultana Nanamo...]]

* Lady Lilira the Lalafel. She acts like an adorably precocious child. And complains about being 'passed around like a swaddled babe'.

* Later, when you actually find one of the actual ex-members of the Band of Heroes, ''they'' want to [[HiddenPurposeTest test you]], too. They've got a better reason, since challenging Titan just gives the Primal more prayer fuel, but the whole god about to attack Limsa Limosa thing is a bit pressing. Y'shtola's reaction echos the player's.

* Trying to get info on how to fight Titan, you find a man claiming to be a member of a band of mercenaries famous for accomplishing said feat. He turns out to be lying, trying to coast on their reputation, and uses it to get you to do his job. When he's found out, his boss decides to settle the matter by having the two of you compete to see who can destroy a large boulder first. And of course, yours is three times as big as his. And he still cheats. The whole situation is just ridiculous.

* After the defeat of Ifrit, emissaries of the Three Grand Companies come to try to court the PlayerCharacter to join them, with Minfilia and Tataru both showing signs of exasperation, and even the PC has an expression at one point that just screams "YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe."

** After completing the request, the guildmaster informs you of an important fact about being a weavere: "While we are not required to respect our clients, we must appear to be respecting their wishes." Furthermore, he declares that you did an excellent job, since "as that little turd was sauntering out of here, I almost mistook him for a gladiator".

* The Scions of the Seventh Dawn (nee the Circle of Knowing) have a sort of clerk/receptionist who watches the front of their pad in Vesper Bay. She's a Lalafell... named [[FinalFantasyXI Tataru]]. And she even does the "taru panic" during one particular cutscene.

* There is a cutscene where the PlayerCharacter is doing a ridiculous dance with Sisipu.
* The opening wagon-ride into Gridania in ''A Realm Reborn has the player seeing some Moogles (in this universe, they appear only to select people), who greet you with adorable horn-toots that only you can hear, and then while talking, [[BottleFairy one downs the drink of another passenger on the wagon]].

* The opening wagon-ride into Gridania has the player seeing some Moogles (in this universe, they appear only to select people), and while talking, [[BottleFairy one downs the drink of another passenger on the wagon]].

* The opening wagon-ride into Gardinia has the player seeing some Moogles (in this universe, they appear only to select people), and while talking, [[BottleFairy one downs the drink of another passenger on the wagon]].

* There is a cutscene where the PlayerCharacter is doing a ridiculous dance with Sisipu.