History Funny / AvatarTheLastAirbenderBookThree

* In the middle of the fight, Azula is in full psychotic mode but just before she blasts Katara with another lightning/fire cocktail, she just says "I'd really rather our family physician look after Little Zuzu if you don't mind." which is equally funny, heartwarming, and just a little sad.

* Toph wonders whether friendships really can last more than one life. Sokka just can't help but try to kill the moment.

* "What's the matter? [[TrashTalk Can't handle a little dirt]], [[TheNickNamer Madam Fussybritches]]?" Toph's inflection on the nickname is the icing on the cake.

-->'''Sokka''' (Still bearded): What could you possibly do for a country of depraved little fire monsters? \\

([[{{Beat}} everybody stares at Aang]]) \\

-->'''Katara:''' "Oh, Sokka! You ''do'' have a heart!"\\
'''Aang:''' (wiping away a tear) "He really ''does'' have a heart, doesn't he?"\\
'''Toph:''' [[DopeSlap (punches him offscreen)]]

-->'''Ty Lee:''' (In a deep voice, pretending to be a guy) Hey there, sweet sugarcakes. How are you liking this party?\\

-->'''Azula:''' Well, yes, I guess you're right. I don't have sob stories like all of you. I could sit here and [[TheUnfavorite complain how mom liked Zuko more than me]], but I don't really care. (frowns and looks down at the fire) My own mother thought I was a monster... \\

Aang's half of the episode is one big SugarWiki/CrowningMomentOfFunny (not that Zuko doesn't get some humorous moments on his end, although his story thread here is mostly serious), but here are some key highlights:

-->'''Toph:''' Congratulations. You've invented a way to travel that's worse than flying. *throws up*

'''Zuko:''' [[{{Beat}} ...]][[HypocrisyNod The Dancing Dragon]].

-->'''Sokka:''' "My first girlfriend turned into the moon."\\
'''Zuko:''' ''[completely and utterly straight-faced]'' [[SincerityMode "That's rough, buddy."]]

-->'''Sokka:''' "Yeah, I ran into that problem earlier."

-->'''Sokka:''' "Hey, I just got orders. Let the prisoners out into the yard."\\
'''Guard:''' "But we're in the middle of a lockdown."\\
'''Sokka:''' "Oh, okay. I'll just go tell the Warden you said that. I'm sure he'll be ''glad'' to hear about you undermining his authority. What's your name again?"

-->'''Sokka:''' "You know, you're pretty wise for a kid."\\
'''Aang:''' "Thanks, Sokka."\\
'''Sokka:''' "Usually it's annoying, but right now I'm impressed."\\
'''Aang:''' ''(flatly)'' "I appreciate that."\\
'''Sokka:''' "So, can I borrow Momo for a week?"\\
'''Aang:''' "Why do you need Momo?"\\
'''Sokka:''' (shrugs)

--->'''Suki:''' (giving him a deep KubrickStare with a sinister sounding chord playing in the background) I'm an elite warrior who's trained for many years in the art of stealth. ([[BeatPanel Beat]], her expression changes into a bright smile with an audible sparkle) I think I can get you backstage!

-->'''June:''' "I see you made it up with your girlfriend."\\
'''Zuko:''' "[[ShesNotMyGirlfriend SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!]]"\\
'''Katara:''' (same time) "I'M NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND!"

* [=Dock/Xu/Bushi=]. At first, the appearance of Xu right after Dock is almost [[HandWave handwaveable]] - then the fact that they're the same guy becomes pretty blatant, to the extent that you fully expect him to AssPull [[RefugeInAudacity a third personality]]. What you DON'T expect is for Aang to ''literally'' blow a fuse when it happens. There's even a puff of smoke!

** And then the third personality says that the ''first'' one is crazy!

** And the way she deliberately tries to make it life-changing by bringing up her emotional baggage in the hope it'll trigger something. It doesn't.

* Ty Lee tries to help Azula talk with boys by suggesting that she should smile a lot and laugh at whatever a boy says, [[MirthlessLaughter even when it's not funny]]. Azula finds it [[BerateAndSwitch "shallow and stupid", but tries it anyways.]]

-->'''Mai''': Aren't you cold?\\
'''Zuko''': I've got a lot on my mind. It's been so long - over three years since I was home - I wonder what's changed. I wonder how I've changed...\\
'''Mai''': I just asked you if you were cold. I didn't ask for your life story.

-->'''Katara''': I like your hair.\\
'''Aang''': I have hair? How long was I out?

'''Toph''': Yeah, we wouldn't want a bird to hear us chatting up there and turn us in.\\
'''Sokka''': Hey! We're in enemy territory; those are enemy birds.\\

-->'''School Principal''': Thank you so much for coming Mr and Mrs...?\\
'''Sokka''': [[MemeticBadass Fire. Wang Fire.]] ''[Strokes beard, gestures to Katara with a pillow in her jumper]'' And this is my wife, Saph Fire.\\
'''Katara''': Sapphire Fire, nice to meet you.

'''Aang''': I'm gonna throw them a [[Film/{{Footloose}} secret dance party]]! \\

'''Sokka''': GoToYourRoom

-->'''Aang''': I've already gotten a picture of Fire Lord Ozai (''shows poster''), and here's one I made out of noodles! (''shows noodle art'')\\
'''Sokka''': Impressive, I admit.

-->'''Sokka:''' ENROLLED IN ''[[BigWhat WHAT?!]] (FaceFault)''

-->'''Aang''': You don't know what it's like, Sokka. You get to be normal all the time!\\
'''Toph''': Ha, ha!

-->'''Mai''': Orange is such an awful color.\\
'''Zuko''': You're so beautiful when you hate the world.\\
'''Mai''': I don't hate you.\\
'''Zuko''': I don't hate you, too.

-->'''Zuko''': It's hot, so I brought you this.\\

'''Mai''': ...Thanks. That was really... refreshing.

-->'''Toph''': Well, that was random.

[[AC:Nightmares and Daydreams]]

'''Momo''': You, my friend, are just a few plums short of a fruit pie.

-->'''Ozai''': Really? You're gonna take ''me'' out? You're not even wearing pants!\\
'''Aang''': No, Fire Lord Ozai, ''you're'' not wearing pants!\\
'''Ozai''': ''(gasps and looks down)'' [[BigNo NOOOOO!]] ''MY ROYAL PARTS ARE SHOWING!'' '''AAAAAAAAARGH!'''''

-->'''Toph''': I'll be able to tell when you're lying!\\
'''Azula''': Are you sure? I'm [[ConsummateLiar a pretty good liar]]. ''[completely straight faced]'' I am a 400-foot-tall purple platypus-bear with pink horns and silver wings.\\

'''Toph''': ...Okay, you're good, I admit it.

-->'''Zuko''': Hmm...[[WhatWouldXDo What would Uncle do]]? ''[impersonates Iroh]'' [[IceCreamKoan You have to look within yourself to save yourself from your other self. Only then will your true self reveal itself.]]

-->'''Aang''': Remember when you two were sick and I got captured by Zhao?\\
'''Sokka''': ''[angrily]'' And you made us suck on frozen frogs? How could I forget? I had a wart on the flap that hangs down from the back of my throat for a month!\\
'''Katara''': Sokka, I looked at it and told you there was nothing there.\\
'''Sokka''': I could feel it! It's ''my'' throatal flap!

'''Zuko''': expressions: ''[[https://cinefeelsdotcom2.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/zuko-wait.jpg (hey, someone gave me a compliment!....wait a minute...)]]''

-->'''Aang''': Hey, Zuko! Come over here! I want you to dance with me!\\
'''Zuko''': ''[makes a shocked expression]'' What?!

-->'''Zuko''': We're the Fire Prince and the Avatar. I think we could take these guys in a fight whoever they are.\\

'''Aang''': Still think we can take them?\\
'''Zuko''': Shh! [[IdioticPartnerConfession I never said that!]]

-->'''Zuko''': Do you guys realize this?\\
'''Chief''': Well, [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin our civilization IS called the Sun Warriors]], [[SarcasmMode so yeah.]]

-->'''Zuko''': Well, I did have a girlfriend. Mai.\\
'''Sokka''': That gloomy girl who sighs a lot?\\
'''Zuko''': ''[[https://www.cap-that.com/avatar/314/images/avatar3x14_0364.jpg (dreamy face)]]'' Yeah...

-->'''Zuko''': Sometimes, clouds have two sides: a dark and light, and a silver lining in between. It's like a silver sandwich! [[{{Metaphorgotten}} When life seems hard, take a bite out of the silver sandwich]]!\\

'''Sokka''': Maybe we haven't failed after all!\\
'''Zuko''': That's the spirit! I can't believe that worked. I didn't even know what I was saying.\\
'''Sokka''': [[BrutalHonesty No, what you said made no sense at all]], but look! It's Suki!

-->'''Suki''': Actually, we met a long time ago.\\
'''Zuko''': We did?\\
'''Suki''': Yeah. You...kind of burned down my village.\\
'''Zuko''': ...\\
'''Sokka''': ''[covers face with one hand]''\\
'''Zuko''': Oh... sorry about that. Nice to see you again. ''[slips out of frame]''

-->'''Zuko''': Hey! Watch who you're shoving!\\
'''Chit-Sang''': I think you mean WHOM I'm shoving!

'''Actor!Sokka''': ...did you have pickled fish for dinner?\\
'''Actress!Yue''': Goodbye, Sokka. I have important moon duties to take care of...and yes, I did have pickled fish.

-->'''Toph''': I wouldn't have cast it any other way! At least I'm not a flying bald lady. ''(cuts to Aang, who is furious who then [[AsideGlance faces the camera with said reaction]])''

-->'''Aang''': Look! It's the Great Divide, the biggest canyon in the Earth Kingdom.\\
'''Sokka''': [[DiscontinuityNod Eh, let's keep flying.]]

-->'''Toph''': What about me?\\
'''Sokka''': For now, you're the Melon Lord's forces.\\
'''Toph''': So I get to chuck flaming rocks at all of you?\\
'''Sokka''': Whatever makes the training feel more realistic.\\
'''Toph''': Sweetness.

-->'''Avatar Kuruk''': ''(surfing)'' I was more of a "go with the flow" kind of Avatar.

-->'''Aang:''' [petulantly] I ''knew'' I shouldn't have asked Kyoshi.

--->'''Sokka:''' ''(To Zuko)'' You saved your uncle's sweaty sandal?\\

-->'''Azula''': All right, hair, it's time to face your doom!

-->'''Crew Member''': I can't believe the captain remembered my birthday! He really does care!\\
'''Other Crew Member''': ''(after being dumped into the ocean)'' Happy birthday.

-->'''Quin Lee''': Hey, I'm Quin Lee. I work up in communications.\\
'''Crew Member''': I work in the engine room...that's probably why we never met before.

-->'''Sokka''': Go, Aang! Airbending slice! (''makes chopping action'')\\
'''Suki''': Shouldn't we be helping him?\\
'''Sokka''': (''thinks about it for a second and gets serious'') The Fire Lord is Aang's fight. We need to stop those airships from destroying the Earth Kingdom.\\
'''Toph''': (''as Sokka moves to look out the window towards the airships behind him'') And how do we do that, Captain Boomerang? I can't see outside this giant hunk of metal.\\
'''Sokka''': (''turns back to the others gleefully, making another chopping motion'') Airship slice!!

'''Toph''': That's how it's done!\\
'''Sokka''': Good work, Toph! Time to take control of the ship, take the wheel.\\
'''Toph''': That's a great idea! Let the blind girl steer the giant airship!\\
'''Sokka''': I was talking to Suki.\\
'''Toph''': ''{{beat}}'' That would make a lot more sense.

-->'''Azula''': ''(points to Li)'' Lo, you're banished. ''(to Lo)'' Li, you can stay. ''[Exit]''\\
'''Li''': But...''I'm'' Li. [[LogicBomb So who's banished?]]\\

-->'''Azula''': I sentence you two to Agni Kai.\\
'''Lo and Li (in unison)''': [[DidNotThinkThisThrough But, we're not firebenders.]]

--->'''Toph''': Oh, sorry, didn't mean to offend you, Phoenix King of Getting His Butt Whooped.\\
'''Suki''': Yeah, or how about King of the...Guys Who Don't Win?\\
'''Toph''': Leave the nicknames to us, honey.

-->'''Katara''': Wait … why did you give me Momo's ears?\\
'''Sokka''': Those are your hair loopies!\\

'''Zuko''': At least you don't look like a porcupine. My hair's not that spiky!\\
'''Mai''': I look like a man.\\
'''Suki''': And why did you paint me firebending?\\
'''Sokka''': I thought it looked more exciting that way. ''(Momo squeaks at him)'' Oh, you think you can do a better job, Momo?\\

'''Iroh''': Hey, my belly's not that big anymore. I've really trimmed down!\\
'''Toph''': Well, I think you all look perfect!\\

-->'''Sokka:''' ''You'' sent Combustion Man after us?!\\
'''Zuko:''' ''[beat]'' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint Well that's not his]] ''[[ComicallyMissingThePoint name…]]''

'''Zuko:''' ''[beat]'' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint That's not his]] ''[[ComicallyMissingThePoint name.]]''

* While overall ''not'' a funny moment in the slightest, there's something darkly humorous about Azula suggesting genocide in a manner expected of a BrattyTeenageDaughter (abruptly cutting her brother off, flipping her side bang and looking nearly ''bored'' for a split second, and smiling smugly once she got her father's approval).

* One of the people who the writer interviewed about the Gaang's adventures was apparently a "[[RecurringExtra surprisingly knowledgeable]] [[RunningGag merchant of cabbage]]."

'''Zuko''': At least you don't look like a boar-q-pine. My hair's not that spiky!\\

-->'''Sokka:''' ENROLLED IN ''[[BigWhat WHAT?!]] FaceFault''

'''Wang Fire!Sokka''': GoToYourRoom

* His impersonation of Azula afterward, because not only is it ''spot on'', the writers even gave Azula!Zuko [[{{Leitmotif}} the same musical cue Azula gets]].

'''Sokka:''' [[YouJustHadToSayIt Things couldn't get much worse]]. ''(Serpent reappears)'' The universe just ''loves'' proving me wrong, doesn't it?
-->'''Toph:''' [[ButtMonkey You make it too easy]]!

-->'''Sokka:''' Thank you, the universe!

'''Zuko''': I've got a lot on my mind. It's been so long - over three years since I was home - I wonder what's changed. I wonder how I've changed..
-->'''Mai''': I just asked you if you were cold. I didn't ask for your life story.

--> '''Aang:''' ... Watch Momo!

--> '''Katara:''' I know something that'll cheer you up.\\

--> '''Toph:''' I'm tapped out. I already picked my toes. Twice.\\

--> '''Piandao:''' ''Of course'' I knew from the beginning that Sokka was Water Tribe. [[SpottingTheThread You might want to think of a better Fire Nation cover name]]. Try "Lee". [[PlanetOfSteves There's a million Lee's]].

--> '''Piandao:''' That's right! Use your surroundings, make them fight for ''you''!\\

--> '''Piandao:''' But I saw something in you right away. I saw a heart as strong as a lion turtle, and twice as big. And as we trained, it wasn't your skills that impressed me. No, it certainly wasn't your skills.

-->'''Mai:''' Why would I want that?\\

--> '''Roku:''' ''(knowingly)'' Love is hard when you're young.

--> '''Roku:''' It's my wedding! Relax, dance, have a cookie!

--> '''Sokka:''' Hawky! Gran-gran, south pole! (''Hawky quickly shakes its head'') I think he gets it!

--> '''Sokka:''' (''as the animals climb over him'') Hawky! Bad Hawky! Play nice!

--> '''Sokka:''' Hey! I got it! The ''perfect'' name for that guy! Combustion Man!\\

--> '''Sokka:''' (''before the screen turns white'') Hey, where's Hawky?

--> '''Hama:''' People go in, and they ''don't'' come out. (''Beat'') (''cheerfully standing up'') [[MoodWhiplash Who wants more tea]]?

--> '''Toph:''' (''with disgust'') I thought they were ocean kumquats.\\

--> '''Old Man Ding:''' OW! Ah, ding-nammit!

--> '''Katara:''' [[ApologeticAttacker I'm sorry, Aang]]!\\

--> '''Appa:''' ''(standing up, points at him)'' You have to take care of yourself. You can't go on like this.
** The best part is the build-up to it; All of Aang's friends are, in turn, expressing their concern over his self-induced sleep deprivation, and at the end, ''Appa'' does the same. And then Aang just wearily admits that he's right.

--> '''Toph:''' Well, there's one other thing we could try. (''Stomps her foot and catches something that flew out from the forest'') Acupuncture! (''Grins widely as [[ThisIsGonnaSuck the boar-q-pine piglet's quills pop out]]'')\\

--> '''Pipsqueak:''' It's destructive.\\

--> '''Aang:''' (''confused'') Oh, uh... I'm sure that'll come in handy. [''Flying around before the invasion and his stomach growls''] (''Aang eats some of the snacks'') Whaddya know? [[BrickJoke It]] ''[[BrickJoke did]]'' [[BrickJoke come in handy]].

--> '''Toph:''' Congratulations. You've invented a way to travel that's worse than flying. *throws up*

--> '''Sokka:''' I am ''so'' glad we added you to the group!

--> '''Aang:''' How was that being careful?!
--> '''Sokka:''' Okay, we have to be quick, careful, and ''lucky''.

--> '''Firebender soldier:''' We'll ''never'' surrender! (''begins attempting to bend but only gets a small spark that fizzes out pathetically'') Uh, okay, we surrender. (''he and his comrades all bow in surrender'')

--> '''Zuko''': Hmm...[[WhatWouldXDo What would Uncle do]]? ''[impersonates Iroh]'' [[IceCreamKoan You have to look within yourself to save yourself from your other self. Only then will your true self reveal itself.]]

--> '''Katara:''' Toph, what happened?!\\

--> '''Katara:''' [[DeadpanSnarker You are a master of surprise, Sokka.]]

-->'''Sokka:''' ''You'' sent Combustion Man after us?!
-->'''Zuko:''' ''[beat]'' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint That's not his]] ''[[ComicallyMissingThePoint name.]]''

--> '''Zuko:''' I got some bad news, I lost my stuff.\\

--> '''Sokka:''' Sooo, all we have to do is make Zuko angry, sounds easy enough! (''starts to poke Zuko with his sword that's in its sheath'') Eh, heheheh, Ah, hahaha! Aaaaaa-!\\

--> '''Zuko:''' It's not a dance, it's a Firebending form.\\

--> '''Katara:''' That way you have someone to practice with, and I get to learn waterbending! Everyone's happy!\\

--> '''Suki''': Actually, we met a long time ago.\\

-->'''Chit-Sang:''' I know you two are hatching an escape plan!\\

-->'''Warden:''' Get the fugitives and throw them in the cooler!
-->''[A guard operating a nearby harpoon launcher turns to the warden]''
-->'''Guard:''' Uh... they ''are'' in a cooler, sir.
-->'''Warden:''' One that's bolted down, and not floating in the water!

--> '''Chit Sang:''' ''[Picks up a random guy and starts shaking him above his head]'' HEY! RIOT!

---> '''Non-Aggressive Inmate:''' Forget about controlling my anger! LET'S RIOT! ''[promptly gets tackled to the ground by another inmate]''

---> '''Non-Aggressive Inmate:''' Hey! What'd you do THAT for? That hurt my feelings!

---> '''Warden:''' Who let these prisoners into the yard? This is supposed to be a lockdown!\\

--> '''Hakoda:''' That's some girl.

--> '''Sokka:''' (''in a sultry voice'') Well, hellooo- ''MMPH''! ''Zuko'', yes! Why would I be expecting ''anyone'' different? (''swallows the rose'')

--> '''Zuko:''' Your sister. She hates me! And I don't know why, but I do care what she thinks of me.\\

--> '''Aang:''' (''jokingly'') Why? Is it your turn to take a little field trip with Zuko? \\

--> '''Aang:''' So you were just gonna take Appa anyway?\\

--> '''Zuko:''' Okay, we'll be sure to do that, guru goody-goody.

-->'''Suki:''' (giving him a deep KubrickStare with a sinister sounding chord playing in the background) I'm an elite warrior who's trained for many years in the art of stealth. ([[BeatPanel Beat]], her expression changes into a bright smile with an audible sparkle) I think I can get you backstage!

-->'''Actor!Zuko:''' I hate you, Uncle! [[BigStupidDooDooHead You smell!]] ''[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment And I hate you for all time!]]''

-->'''Katara:''' Relax, Aang. They're not accurate portrayals. It's not like I'm a preachy crybaby who can't resist giving over-emotional speeches about hope all the time. ''(Everyone looks at her'') What?\\

--> '''Katara:''' I have a surprise for everyone!\\

--> '''Pakku:''' It's polite to bow to your master, but how about a hug for your new grandfather? [...]\\

--> '''Bumi:''' Wait! Someone's missing from your group! Someone ''very'' important. ({{Beat}}) Where's Momo?\\

--> '''Toph:''' You mean, ''Fire Lord''. \\

--> '''Aang:''' [petulantly] I ''knew'' I shouldn't have asked Kyoshi.

-->'''Sokka:''' ''(To Zuko)'' You saved your uncle's sweaty sandal?\\

--> '''Quin Lee''': Hey, I'm Quin Lee. I work up in communications.\\

-->''Toph clears a room full of soldiers.''\\

--> '''Azula''': I sentence you two to Agni Kai.\\

--> '''Piandao:''' But I saw something in you right away. I saw a heart as strong as a lion turtle, and twice as big.
--> '''Piandao:'''And as we trained, it wasn't your skills that impressed me.
--> '''Piandao:'''No, it certainly wasn't your skills.

--->'''Katara:''' I know this is from YOU, Sokka! Toph can't ''write''! Ugh, you're all driving me crazy!\\

* Katara writes a letter to Toph's parents for her as the episode ends.