History AssassinOutclassin / RealLife

* You know UsefulNotes/{{Qin Shi Huang|di}}, first emperor of China? He once survived an assasination attempt made by the king of Yan during his conquest of China by avoiding the initial attack, running away and around a pillar Benny Hill style until his doctor threw his bag at the assassin to incapacitate him, and then drawing his overly long ceremonial sword to stab him to death. He promptly passed out due to exhuastion. If you've ever watched WebVideo/{{Technoblade}} comment on the duel with LetsPlay/{{Dream}}, then this is the event he's describing.

* There were over 40 attempts on UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler's life, mostly by his subordinates. Most of them were caught by his security detail before they could prove an immediate threat, others were foiled merely by random chance. Hitler avoided three separate bomb attacks this way, the first two by simply leaving ahead of schedule, the third (and most famous one) when he was shielded from the worst of the blast by a wooden table leg.

* There were over 40 attempts on UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler's life, mostly by his subordinates. Most of them were caught by his security detail before they could prove an immediate threat, others were foiled merely by random chance. Hitler avoided three separate bomb attacks this way, the first two by simply leaving ahead of schedule, the third (and most famous one) when he was shielded from the worst of the blast by [[ForWantOfANail a wooden table leg]].

* A man in Portland, Oregon hired a hitman to kill his estranged wife. After a protracted struggle, the woman was able to disarm the hitman and subsequently [[http://badassoftheweek.com/kuhnhausen.html strangled him to death]].

* You know UsefulNotes/{{Qin Shi Huang|di}}, first emperor of China? He once survived an assasination attempt made by the king of Yan during his conquest of China by avoiding the initial attack, running away and around a pillar Benny Hill style until his doctor threw his bag at the assassin to incapacitate him, and then drawing his overly long ceremonial sword to stab him to death. He promptly passed out due to exhuastion. If you've ever watched LetsPlay/{{Technoblade}} comment on the duel with LetsPlay/{{Dream}}, then this is the event he's describing.

* You know Qin Shi Huang, first emperor of China? He once survived an assasination attempt made by the king of Yan during his conquest of China by avoiding the initial attack, running away and around a pillar Benny Hill style until his doctor threw his bag at the assassin to incapacitate him, and then drawing his overly long ceremonial sword to stab him to death. He promptly passed out due to exhuastion. If you've ever watched LetsPlay/{{Technoblade}} comment on the duel with LetsPlay/{{Dream}}, then this is the event he's describing.

* Cassius Clay (the 19th century politician, not the boxer) survived at least two assassination attempts by pro-slavery partisans. He was shot during a speech in 1843 but it deflected off the scabbard of his Bowie knife. He then ran down the assassin and cut off his nose and one eye (possibly an ear too). He then threw him down an embankment. Another time he was attacked by several pro-slavery partisans with Bowie knives, and unfortunately dropped his own. He managed to wrest one from one of his assailants and killed one of them before passing out from blood loss.

* Hathcock wasn't the first sniper to draw such ire, as UsefulNotes/SimoHayha managed to piss off the Soviet army so much[[note]] 542 confirmed kills with a non-scoped rifle, ~200 with submachinegun[[/note]] that they sent counter-snipers after him (he was unharmed), bombed the area he was thought to be in (he was unharmed), and one sniper managed to finally place an exploding round in Hayha's face... quickly earning a regular round in his head, and Hayha staggered off to the nearest Finnish unit, getting sent to the hospital. Interestingly, the USSR withdrew 11 days later, the same day that Hayha woke up from a coma. The jokes about the Soviets having heard about this and saying ScrewThisImOuttaHere practically wrote themselves.

* Bill Clinton failed assassinations:

** One maniac simply stood on the sidewalk outside the White House grounds and sprayed bullets at a group of men on the distant White House lawn, thinking one of them was the President. None of them were. He was subdued by [[HeroicBystander random passers by]], having failed to even injure anyone, much less kill the president.

* During a visit to Georgia (the sovereign Ex-Soviet Republic, not the US state) George W Bush and Georgian leader Mikhail Sakashvilli were subject to an assassination attempt with a grenade thrown at the two. It failed. Maybe that is why Bush later displayed surprising dodging skills when an enraged Iraqi journalist threw two shoes at him at a press conference.
* In 2011, an assassin tried to kill US Congressional Representative Gabby Giffords at a constituent event. She was shot; but before she could be killed, two bystanders grabbed the magazine for his gun and hit him over the head with a chair. Then a [[RetiredBadass retired US Army Colonel]] who had gotten between the assassin and Representative Giffords tackled him to the ground.

* Spanish privateer Creator/AlonsoDeContreras had a bounty put on him by the Ottoman Empire, but he avoided capture and defeated many of those trying to get it.

* 18th century Spanish captain UsefulNotes/AntonioBarcelo got a bounty put on his head by the Northern African powers due to his prolific activities hunting down Muslims pirates and slavers. All the bounty hunters that tried to take it ended up adding up to his records.

* UsefulNotes/FidelCastro survived over 638 assassination attempts from the CIA. These assassinations have ranged from exploding cigars to mafia-style shootings. Castro himself was well aware of the numerous failed attempts on his life and once said, "If surviving assassination attempts were an Olympic event, I would win the gold medal." He also said that when he dies, no one will believe it. [[note]]That said, he passed away on 25th November 2016[[/note]] He once told Putin the only reason he's still alive is because he refused to have his subordinates manage his security and always dealt with it himself. He also hated ''Call of Duty: Black Ops'', which just happens to start with a mission where you shoot him in the head. Of course, this is a double.

* During the 2022 Russian invasion of Ukraine; Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky was reportedly the target of more than a dozen failed assassination attempts. Zelensky quipped "Do you remember that film, ''GroundhogDay''?"

* During a visit to Georgia (the sovereign Ex-Soviet Republic, not the US state) George W Bush and Georgian leader Mikhail Sakashvilli were subject to an assassination attempt with a grenade thrown at the two. It failed. Maybe that is why Bush later displayed surprising dodging skills when an enraged Iraqi journalist threw two shoes at him at a press conference.

* There were over 40 attempts on UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler's life, mostly by his subordinates. Most of them were caught by his security detail before they could prove an immediate threat, others were foiled merely by random chance. Hitler avoided three separate bomb attacks this way, the first two by simply leaving ahead of schedule, the third (and most famous one) when he was shielded from the worst of the blast by [[ForWantOfANail a wooden table leg]].
* Zog I, Skanderbeg III of the Albanians survived over 55 assassination attempts. He also carried a personal sidearm (a tradition carried on by his son Crown Prince Leka) and is said to have exchanged gunfire with potential assassins on at least one occasion.
* UsefulNotes/FidelCastro survived over 638 assassination attempts from the CIA. These assassinations have ranged from exploding cigars to mafia-style shootings. Castro himself was well aware of the numerous failed attempts on his life and once said, "If surviving assassination attempts were an Olympic event, I would win the gold medal." He also said that when he dies, no one will believe it. [[note]]That said, he passed away on 25th November 2016[[/note]] He once told Putin the only reason he's still alive is because he refused to have his subordinates manage his security and always dealt with it himself. He also hated ''Call of Duty: Black Ops'', which just happens to start with a mission where you shoot him in the head. Of course, this is a double.

* [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mithridates_VI_of_Pontus Mithridates VI]] of Pontus (modern-day Anatolia) was a king in the evening years of UsefulNotes/TheRomanRepublic who regularly ingested poisons in order to make himself immune. It seems to have worked, since he managed to be a constant thorn in Rome's side, and we don't even know how many attempts there were on his life since he survived all of them. When he eventually [[BullyingADragon overreached and Rome came crashing down on him]], he attempted to take his own life with poison but failed due to the aforementioned immunity (a friend killed him with a dagger).
* UsefulNotes/CharlesDeGaulle allegedly survived ''31'' assassination attempts, the most notable being in 1962 when his car was hit by machine gun fire. He had roughly 140 rounds fired at him!
* Cassius Clay (the 19th century politician not the boxer) survived at least two assassination attempts by pro-slavery partisans. He was shot during a speech in 1843 but it deflected off the scabbard of his Bowie knife. He then ran down the assassin and cut off his nose and one eye (possibly an ear too). He then threw him down an embankment. Another time he was attacked by several pro-slavery partisans with Bowie knives, and unfortunately dropped his own. He managed to wrest one from one of his assailants and killed one of them before passing out from blood loss.
* Soviet UsefulNotes/WorldWarII sniper Lyudmila Pavlichenko was the most accomplished known female sniper in history and 36 of her 309 kills were German snipers with orders to kill her.
* During a visit to Georgia (the sovereign Ex-Soviet Republic, not the US state) George W Bush and Georgian leader Mikhail Sakashvilli were subject to an assassination attempt with a grenade thrown at the two. It failed. Maybe that is why Bush later displayed surprising dodging skills when an enraged Iraqi journalist threw two shoes at him at a press conference.
* You know Qin Shi Huang, first emperor of China? He once survived an assasination attempt made by the king of Yan during his conquest of China by avoiding the initial attack, running away and around a pillar Benny Hill style until his doctor threw his bag at the assassin to incapacitate him, and then drawing his overly long ceremonial sword to stab him to death. He promptly passed out due to exhuastion. If you've ever watched LetsPlay/{{Technoblade}} comment on the duel with LetsPlay/{{Dream}}, then this is the event he's describing.