It would be dishonest to call Sucker Punch a trashy movie. It is not a movie, it is a two hour long cut-scene from a bad videogame. It is hard for me to find a single facet of this movie that isn't god awful, and I'm struggling to even begin describing how it all goes so wrong. The thing that stands out the most about this movie is just how excruciatingly boring it is; quite an achievement for a movie about scantily dressed babes fighting robot samurai. The problem is I don't give a damn about the vacuous protagonist and her implausible situation so there is no tension to the CGI heavy, anime-esque action sequences. The "real world" is more ridiculous than the dream sequence action scenes. It is a world in which a young lady can receive a lobotomy within days of being spuriously accused of murder, without any police inquiry (let alone a trial). But why look for logic in something that is clearly meant to be dumb fun? Because the movie forgot to provide the fun. The action is an intangible clusterfuck of green screens, trashy rock covers and Zack Snyder's patented slowmo abuse. The first ten minutes of this movie is entirely shot in slow motion (I shit you not). The final insult is that in its desperate attempt to get a PG 13 rating, much of the violence and sexiness is curtailed and the cussing is drowned out. This movie just doesn't have the balls to give the goods. I think the worst thing though is how the movie dresses itself up as a female empowerment allegory. These women are meant to use their looks, their imagination, and their strength of character to over come their real world and dream adversaries. But would the victims of rapists and murderers have fantasies about Lolita outfits, trench warfare and mecha? This isn't empowerment, it is exploitation. And these aren't escapist fantasies for women; they are the wet dreams of a 13 year old boy. It might seem like I've been heavy on the hyperbole in this review, but I am honestly not not exaggerating. No one should watch it. If you're really tempted towards seeing this movie, just don't. You'd be better off with anime and internet porn.
In order to post comments, you need to