Corrupt-a-wish.

Granted, however it cost you your life savings.

I wish for a dragon maid

Granted, your maid is a literal dragon, too huge to fit in a house, and she sucks at houseworks.

I wish I can join the Kerberos and own a set of Protect-Gear.

(Bump?)

looks fun, but I think you have to see the anime to be able to corrupt that one

Haven't seen the anime. Will try anyway! You get your Protect-Gear. It works just fine...until your third mission with it, when the engine suddenly cuts out and you lose all power.

I wish for a crisp, new, *real* $50 bill.

Wish granted, but no merchants take the $50, it gets windswept as you flail your arms in frustration, preventing you from taking it to a bank.

I wish that they would bring back Futurama again.

Granted but now its the worst and due to a mass recording deletion only season.

Thats what you get for 'ing me!

I wish to become a all powerful    GOD!   

edited 17th Jul '17 7:17:19 PM by vjoi

Granted but you are the god of coffee tables so your power varies if there are any coffee tables in the area.

I wish to be the man who stopped the apocalypse.

Granted, you have to sacrifice your life, your existence, and your precious 100% complete save data to stop the apocalypse.

I wish I can turn every single president into cute 17 year old girls.

Granted, but they'd no longer be president due to age requirements. Plus you'd probably never get to see them as they'd be 24/7 lab rats for their nations trying to return them to normal. It'd also probably send worldwide diplomacy into a complete mess.

I wish that Anime companies did English dubs in-house with VA veterans like Hank Azaria, Tress Mac Neille, Tara Strong, John Di Maggio, and so on for simultaneous release.

Granted. The voice actors do a good job, but the dubbed shows have been edited beyond recognition.

I wish everyone in the world solved their conflicts by playing some silly game or sport instead of using violence.

Your wish is granted. Unfortunately the game to solve said conflict is Mario Party, which accelerated the violent intent in us humans. This led to the world leaders to initiate a nuclear strike on one another because one of them cheated the other out of the star and its bullshit that they are winning. So now all of society broke down and became a post apocalyptic wasteland because we think its a good idea to have world leaders settle their differences in Mario Party.

I wish for the ability to clone myself.

Yeah, but your clone kills you on sight for no apparent reason at all.

I wish I had good, streakless/non-bleeding markers and pens.

Granted but all of the pens are empty.

I wish to have a financially stable,fun and safe job

Granted, you're now a safe. You're financially stable with a pile of money in your stomach, fun to count money, and it's definitely safe when you're literally a safe.

I wish I can resurrect Hitler, turn him into a cute, harmless 17 year old little girl wearing nekomimi and maid dress, and then make her yell "Fegelein! Fegelein! Fegelein!" over and over again.

edited 29th May '17 3:16:25 AM by Mhazard

Granted. S/he's promptly elected president. But we all get to watch live action WebVideo.Hitler Rants.

I wish to buy up prime real estate in Hell and open up its first ski lodge. (Because why not?)

edited 29th May '17 2:28:19 AM by CenturyEye

Granted, but the first time you go down the slope, your skis melt and you end up barbecued.

I wish I had a BFS and were strong enough to use it.

Granted, the muscles in your shoulders aren't and they get pulled.

I wish for trailers for kids movies weren't so horrible.

edited 29th May '17 5:20:02 AM by NASCARLOVER427

The trailers for kids movies are now AWESOME. But, they're the only awesome part of the movies. :( Kids movies have become bland, unimaginative, cliche-ridden, and boring.

I wish for an original NES and a copy of Tetris.

Granted, but they were left in an attic in Florida for 25 years and have corroded from the heat and humidity.

I still have my copy of Tetris NES, btw :D but no way to play it :(

I wish for world peas. Like, I want peas from all around the world.

edited 29th May '17 6:53:13 AM by sarysa

A specimen of every single species of pea in existence is shipped to your front door. It's a lot of peas, but they're small enough that you can sweep them up fairly easily. However, they're also small enough that you miss some. These peas take root in your front yard/nearest place a pea plant can grow and being to spread. Since they come from different parts of the world and different conditions, the local environment isn't adapted for them. The peas multiply uncontrollably, becoming an invasive species that kills off or pushes out the native ones. Unfortunately, this includes most of your region's crops and livestock. Prices for normal foods skyrocket as most food has to be shipped in, so most people are stuck eating peas for the rest of their lives.

I wish that I could make any food taste however I wanted.

Granted, The popular opinion shifts from food for nourishment to shit.

I wish Indycar, F1, and other motorsports had official diecasts (toy cars based on cars in the series) that weren't rare and of shit quality.

Granted. They aren't rare AND of shit quality. Now they're just shit.

I wish I had an army of fully-functioning cyborg T-Rex clones that obeyed my every command

You have a cyborg T-Rex army. Do you know how many other people want a cyborg T-Rex army, and what awfulness they're willing to unleash upon you to get it? You're about to find out!

I wish for a medium rare cheeseburger with a fire-roasted Hatch chili pepper on top, and a side of fries. Please.

Granted, but it's heavily salted; and you must eat it without a beverage because you didn't order that.

I wish for 's wish to come with a beverage of her choosing.