Lover of masks.
The British Royal Family does not exist.
The British Royal Family hails from Britain.
Britain lost the American revolution.
Britain was led by the monarchy.
The monarchy was appointed by god.
QED God lost to America.
God therefore does not exist.
Therefore there never was a royal family.
This game is kinda fun.
Gravity does not exist
Please.
The filidh that cam frae Skye
- What goes up, must come down
- This law is Universal
- Balloons never come down
- If Balloons don't come down, then Gravity isn't universal, and therefore doesn't exist.
Simon Bolivar is really the Nostalgia Critic
edited 15th Apr '11 1:55:35 PM by SantosLHalper
Halper's Law: as the length of an online discussion of minority groups increases, the probability of "SJW" or variations being used = 1.
Simon Bolivar is really the Nostalgia Critic
Simon Bolivar founded a masonic lodge
Simon Bolivar is a Freemason
Nazis persecuted Freemasons
Nazis persecuted Jews
All Jews are Freemasons
All Freemasons are Jews
The Nostalgia Critic's website is on the Internet
Websites exist on the internet
QED Jes run intenet [sic]
Tv Trops is websit [sic]
Jews run Tv Tropes
Therefore, Tv Tropes is a Jewish Conspiracy
Premise: Taepodong missiles are made of HUMANS
edited 16th Apr '11 9:02:16 AM by GleegSnapZig
What are your crimes, signature reader?
The filidh that cam frae Skye
You never actually proved that Bolivar is the Nostalgia Critic: you just proved that TV Tropes is a Jewish conspiracy.
Halper's Law: as the length of an online discussion of minority groups increases, the probability of "SJW" or variations being used = 1.
Wilson
Since you are claiming to say that proof exists of a Jewish consipracy, a jewish conspiracy must exist. Jewish conspiracies are an idea dating back centuries, a century is hundred years. A year is 365 and 1/4 days, which is also the time it takes to circle the sun. The sun is a massive ball of hot plasma undergoing thermonuclear reactions. Nuclear explosions cause electromagnetic pulses. An electromagnetic pulse can wipe out all electronics withien its field of effect. This would cause blackouts and riots, as well as plane crashes. A plane crashed into the twin towers in a plot involving terrorists. Terrorists use guns, guns were used by the trenchcoat mafia, therefore, you intend to shoot up a school. I'm calling the police.
Zen and the Art of Not Giving a Shit.
The filidh that cam frae Skye
Premise: Neuschwanstein Castle is actually in Alberta.
edited 21st May '12 2:36:57 PM by SantosLHalper
Halper's Law: as the length of an online discussion of minority groups increases, the probability of "SJW" or variations being used = 1.
my current job
Neuschwanstein Castle is Really in Alberta, a Canadian province. Observe: "Neuschwanstein" is a German name. Germany was a European Empire. Europe is a Steampunk Centre. Steampunk is AWESOME!! Awesome describes— no wait, that's an error. Awesomeness is spread all over the world. The world's largest country is Russia. It held Alaska. Alaska borders Yukon Canada. Yukon Canada is less populated than Alberta. More People=more production. And Neuschwanstein was behind it all. Therefore, Neuschwanstein Castle is in Alberta, though come to think of it, Alberta could really be Manitoba, and they just mixed the two up...
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
Spooky Scary Boneheaded Man
...
Alright, not one page in, and we've already fallen out of practice.
Taepodong missiles at made of People!
Taepodong missiles are from Korea.
Korea contains HUMANS.
Humans are people.
People can explode.
Missiles also explode.
Ergo, the Taepodong Missiles must be made of people!
NEXT PREMISE: You Tube is run by Insectoid aliens from Europa.
"The Stick has sentimental value. It's like an enormous, hideous teddy bear we can kill things with." -rikalous
Underfail
You Tube has been taken over by Google+.
No human in their right mind would use Google+ so it must have been aliens.
Google has six letters in it.
Europa is the sixth closest moon to Jupiter.
A lot of insects have six legs.
Therefore, insectoid aliens from Europa have taken over You Tube.
Next premise: Terrible school lunches are made of cat food and pencil shavings. Hey, I've moved to a new account! I go by Silver Glyph now.
Pencils are cheap
Ergo, Pencil Shavings are cheap.
Catfood is cheap.
Terrible school lunches are made of cheap stuff.
Since pencil shavings are cheap and catfood is cheap, terrible school lunches are made of them.
TV Tropes exists because of banana ice cream
edited 18th Feb '14 7:29:11 AM by ironcommando
...eheh
Fly Air Madeline
Ice cream is sometimes eaten in front of televisions
Bananas are used on lots of comedic television programs
Banana is a flavor of ice cream
Therefore, television caused banana ice cream to be created
Some people eat banana flavored ice cream in front of televisions
This was pretty meta, they realized
So they started a meta website about television
Beds are interested in sex
edited 18th Feb '14 11:02:50 AM by lewattoo
"I'll show you all of Paris, I'll take you on a tour, we'll go up and up and up so high they'll long for an encore!"
my current job
Beds are interested in sex:
Most porno flicks have their main sex scene on beds
Porno is... well, awesome!
Sleep is awesome, too!
Sleeping involves dreams
Dreams can have sex in them.
Dreams can have beds in them.
Beds, however, cannot have dreams, and therefore, not have sex in them.
Despite this, they would like to because Lord Business has just recently come to power.
Lord Business is a strict rule upholder.
Rules are on the internet
Rule 34 states that there's porn on everything that exists. NO EXCEPTIONS!
Therefore, beds are interested in sex. Any questions?
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
This one's not original, but...
God is love. Love is blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.
Spooky Scary Boneheaded Man
....
NEXT PREMISE: Gabe Newell is a Russia Spy who can speak Esperanto.
edited 3rd Mar '14 8:39:25 PM by OmegaShadowcry
"The Stick has sentimental value. It's like an enormous, hideous teddy bear we can kill things with." -rikalous
Gabe Newell founded Valve Software.
Valve Software made Half-Life.
Radioactive materials have half-lives.
Radioactive materials can be used to make nukes.
During the Cold War, people were worried about a nuclear war with Russia.
Therefore, Gabe Newell is Russian.
This fact is clearly kept secret; the only possible reason for this is because he is a spy.
I don't speak Russian.
I don't speak Esperanto either.
Therefore, Gabe Newell is a Russian spy who speaks Esperanto.
Next Premise: Samuel L. Jackson is Liam Neeson's half-brother.
my current job
Samuel L. Jackson is Liam Neeson's Half-Brother
Samuel L. Jackson loves playing characters with authority
Authority=power
Power= Work done/amount of time
Essence is in life. Hence the phrase "Essence of life"
Life looks like Lion
Liam Neeson played a Lion.
Lions have been known to avenge people over their loved one's deaths
"Avengers" is a movie Samuel L. Jackson was in.
Therefore, Title Drop.
Next Premise: That WWIII is about to happen.
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
Fly Air Madeline
Video games about war are popular
Paintball is a popular sport
Paintball resembles war
Some people who play war video games enjoy playing paintball
War video games have massive battles with as many as 100 players
Someone will stage a 100 person paintball tournament because they enjoy war video games
With that many players, someone will mistake a real gun for a paintball gun
The person whose friend got shot won't like this, so he'll take up real guns
He will vow to kill the person who was shot
People who play war video games will notice this
They'll want to get in on the action
Everybody in the world will have guns
Ergo, WWIII will be started soon because of violent video games and Paintball.
Premise: Spyro the Dragon caused the Occupy movement
edited 7th Mar '14 1:31:24 PM by lewattoo
"I'll show you all of Paris, I'll take you on a tour, we'll go up and up and up so high they'll long for an encore!"
Spyro is purple.
The color purple is associated with nobility
Nobility is considered to be the One percent
Plenty of people are pissed about the one percent's disproportionate political voice
Ergo, Spyro caused the Occupy Movement
Next Premise: The Beatles all eat babies
I now go by Graf von Tirol.
my current job
C'mon, I'm tired of having to bring this game back to life when someone stops posting!
The possum is a potential perpetrator; he did place possum poo in the plum pot.
Fly Air Madeline
Some babies like the Beatles
The Beatles' music is almost universally loved
Love leads to babies
Babies need love
The Beatles need love
Ergo, the Beatles eat babies.
North Korea is the freest country in the world
"I'll show you all of Paris, I'll take you on a tour, we'll go up and up and up so high they'll long for an encore!"
Kim Jeong Un was NK's leader
Kim Jeong Un is dead
Dead people are considered free
If you want to be a leader of a free country, then you need to be very very free(I know this as I am American and this is our general logic..... sort of)
therefore North Korea is free.
scenario: Hash browns are going to inherent the planet and enslave humans with the use of disco music.
edited 27th Mar '14 5:16:15 PM by AnimeBadger
Fly Air Madeline
Hash browns are made from potatoes
Potatoes generate electricity
Disco music requires electricity
Monsanto is making genetically engineered potatoes
Monsanto will eventually make an intelligent potato because of this
The potatoes will be made into hash browns
These hash browns will resent humans
They will destroy all power plants and deprive humans of disco music
In order for humans to hear disco, the hash browns will make them work
Ergo, hash browns will enslave humans with disco
Premise: All video games are windows to a specific planet in the universe
edited 28th Mar '14 9:44:44 AM by lewattoo
"I'll show you all of Paris, I'll take you on a tour, we'll go up and up and up so high they'll long for an encore!"
Some video games are played on Microsoft consoles.
Microsoft owns the Windows OS.
Windows can also play video games.
Some of those games are emulations of other consoles/computer models.
Among the emulated consoles include Sega consoles.
Sega now releases games for all known consoles and smartphones.
Furthermore, one of Sega's consoles is the Sega Saturn.
Going back, did I mention Windows?
Ergo, all video games are windows to the planet Saturn.
Mr. Bean is dominating the entire universe, and nobody's even aware of it.
I now go by Graf von Tirol.
Ghosts N' Stuff Remix
Mr. Bean is the lead character in a famous British comedy series.
Another British comedy is Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Terry Gilliam was one of the Pythons.
THEREFORE, Terry Gilliam is Mr. Bean. HOWEVER-
Terry Gilliam made a movie called Time Bandits
THEREFORE Terry Gilliam/Mr. Bean is a Time Bandit, one of the lesser known, but most important, hiearchies of the Illuminati.
The Illuminati control the world.
THEREFORE Mr. Bean controls the world. Quod Erat Demonstratum.
Equestria exists.
edited 18th Apr '14 7:06:56 PM by Jinxmenow
"Monsters are tragic beings. They are born too tall, too strong, too heavy. They are not evil by choice. That is their tragedy."
Basically, in this game, you present a premise and then must use the most ludicrous logic imaginable to defend it. You have two options: either 'prove' your own premise or post a premise for other posters to 'prove'. Here are two examples:
Premise: Saint Augustine is a ninja
Premise: Steve Irwin is more powerful than God
Here's a premise for others to follow up with:
Premise: The British Royal Family does not actually exist
https://www.facebook.com/emileunmedicatedanduncut