I ineptly try to wield it like a Frying Pan of Doom and end up brain-damaging myself. I die a slow, lingering death in the hospital.
The next poster is attempting a Flirtatious Smack on the Ass.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Prim, proper, and yet so socially awkward
I get Megaton Punched into the street, where a car runs over my wrists and severs my hands off.
TNP has the ability to turn into an octopus.
"I shall not be foolish again, my dear Gwendolyn!"
He'll take the case!
I am harpooned by some fishermen and served at a seafood restaurant.
TNP is exploring Antarctica.
Word's second most famous attorney with a bird-related name.
Scorpio LAT “Leiurus-V”
I went without proper Antarctic clothing, freeze to death, and my corpse is placed in the 'Museum of People Who Died Stupid Deaths' as Exhibit #64321, 'An Idiot Who Went to Antarctica Without Preparations'.
TNP is visiting the above museum.
"I swear, Colonel, I did not shoot at you because you called my sister slow. I would not miss if I did."
chaos catby with a flannel shirt addiction
I lean on what I thought was a wall, but turned out to be a large board used for scenery. It tips over and crushes me.
TNP is eating chips.
I used to plug my deviantart here but turns out the link was too long.
Not Sherlock Holmes
The chips overload my cholesterol levels, and my heart explodes.
TNP is already dead.
“Now! Let us engage in the art of deduction!”
He'll take the case!
The zombie apocalypse begins, I rise from the dead, and I am later shotgunned in the head by one of the survivors.
TNP is at a bakery.
Word's second most famous attorney with a bird-related name.
Not Sherlock Holmes
TNP is the Batman.
“Now! Let us engage in the art of deduction!”I get into a stalking contest with Slenderman. After many grueling years, I finally lose. At least I outlasted the average Joe Schmoe and kept hold of my sanity... mostly.
The next poster is attempting to bribe a dragon.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Blerg.
The dragon isn't impressed because the bribe was not a talking donkey. He breathes fire on me and turns me into a crispy toast to eat for breakfast.
TNP is playing with an Ouija board.
I write occasionally
chaos catby with a flannel shirt addiction
I accidentally summon an evil demon spirit who possesses me to jump off the nearest cliff. I get impaled on the rocks at the bottom.
TNP has to go to bed.
I used to plug my deviantart here but turns out the link was too long.There's an incubus lying in wait there. I go Out with a Bang.
The next poster is attempting to repair an umbrella.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Braids From S286 Not Included
Just when I thought I fixed it, the umbrella closes on me and smothers me.
TNP is acting on stage.
"Rarity, are you okay? We gotta get you and your friends outta here soon!"I'm on the unfortunate end of a Not-So-Fake Prop Weapon.
The next poster sees a cowering, trembling puppy.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
chaos catby with a flannel shirt addiction
Turns out it's a wolf puppy with a very protective mum. Getting ripped to shreds ensues.
TNP is sightseeing.
I used to plug my deviantart here but turns out the link was too long.
He'll take the case!
I get so wrapped up in seeing the sights and taking photos, I end up walking straight off a cliff.
TNP is at the mall.
Word's second most famous attorney with a bird-related name.
chaos catby with a flannel shirt addiction
I pick up a toy gun from a store and jokingly pretend to shoot myself. Turns out it wasn't a toy.
TNP is at a fancy restaurant with their significant other.
edited 2nd May '18 5:28:58 AM by QuantumMelody29
I used to plug my deviantart here but turns out the link was too long.
I'm allergic to the thing i get served and die on the spot because nobody had an epipen.
TNP is playing Fallout
A very Fun-Guy
I’m having so much fun that I fail to notice the actual nuclear apocalypse that is happening outside my door. War never changes, Indeed.
TNP just discovered they have psychic powers.
I was asked to put a signaure here, So this is it.A Mind Is a Terrible Thing to Read. I am squicked out so much, I pour Brain Bleach into my head and die.
The next poster is frolicking in a meadow with cute little baby bunnies.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Bitter hatred
The Bunnies turn evil and eat me alive.
TNP is replying to Youtube comments.
The world is afraid of you...and it should be. You will never be whole, Arthur Curry. Never. I have come to end the fear."
Not Sherlock Holmes
I get so salty my head explodes.
TNP bumped a forum thread.
“Now! Let us engage in the art of deduction!”The computer I am sitting at suddenly gains sentience and homicidal tendencies. I don't last long once it figures out how to carry the space heater across the bathroom and drop it into my bathtub.
The next poster is eating ice cream.
edited 11th May '18 8:32:48 PM by Miss_Desperado
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Braids From S286 Not Included
It's so cold that I get a literal brain freeze.
TNP is lost at sea.
"Rarity, are you okay? We gotta get you and your friends outta here soon!"
They panic and stampede. I try to escape by hanging onto a cliff, but someone throws me off.
TNP has a frying pan.
...