"Somebody once said that a politician is a person who can talk for hours and never actually say anything. If that's true, Hideo Kojima could run for government and be emperor of the universe by mid-afternoon."
A kid-friendlier version of the Sleazy Politician
, where the main purpose of elected officials is to bore the audience half to death with rhetoric. Frequently involves malapropers
, apologies for their lack of expertise in speaking
, and (broken) promises of being short and to the point.
Compare Character Filibuster
- Lucky Luke:
- At the end of "Fingers", the mayor wishes to say a few words. Cut to several hours later, where he's still talking.
- Another has Luke help build a bridge across the Mississippi which isn't completed by the time the opening ceremony comes around. Luke tells the governor to stall for time, which he does by announcing that on this day praise must be given to the Lord, and starts reading from the Bible, page 1. The bridge is finished by the time he gets to Job.
- Astérix: The Helvetian assembly consists of one chieftain making a speech and every other one sleeping deeply. When they switch out, the new one even says "I will be brief..."
- Spirou and Fantasio. The mayor of Champignac is widely feared for his entirely improvised and metaphor-breaking digressions.
- Lincoln. On the day of the vote, the speaker tells the audience they will now briefly recap the proposed amendment. Everyone bursts out laughing on "briefly".
- The Witches of Eastwick. A newspaper editor is giving a long (multipage) speech which is interrupted when the title witches inadvertently cause a rainstorm.
- Russian Humor: "Is it possible to wrap an elephant in one single Pravda newspaper?" - "Yes, if there's the full text of one of Brezhnev's speeches in it." The spoken version of such a speech would be even longer and more boring, since Brezhnev was an old man and spoke very slowly.
- Dave Barry once mentioned the real reason Cuban troops were found all over the world in the seventies and eighties was because it was preferable to staying in Cuba, where they have to listen to extremely long speeches.
- One Monty Python's Flying Circus sketch has an interviewed man claim that "Speaking as a Conservative candidate, I like to drone on and on and on, never letting anyone else get in a word in edgeways, until I start frothing at the mouth and falling over backwards." He then proceeds to do just that.
- The "Young Tory of the Year" sketch from A Bit of Fry and Laurie plays on the same idea, with competitors simply rattling off Conservative buzzwords of the Thatcher era for as long as the competition will let them. They're time-limited, because it's a Serious Competition, but the clear expectation is that the Young Tory of the Year will be fully expected to be able to hold forth in that manner indefinitely.
- The Capitol Steps parodied Bill Clinton's tendency to give long-winded speeches in "Don't Stop Talkin' Until Tomorrow."
- Senator Snort from George Lichty's Grin And Bear It comics has a reputation for filibusters. One gag had a colleague remark that Senator Snort still has the floor, even though there's a new President in office.
- Senator Beauregard Claghorn from The Fred Allen Show.
- Dungeons & Dragons adventure OA6 Ronin Challenge. During the opening ceremonies of the Kumite tournament the contestants march onto a field and take martial arts stances. A series of long-winded dignitaries then begin to give lengthy welcoming speeches. This is actually a Secret Test: the authorities are trying to weed out unqualified participants. Any of the contestants who moves even slightly during the speeches is immediately disqualified.
- Not a politician per se, but when SpongeBob SquarePants was chosen hall monitor, he gave a long, boring acceptance speech (which includes a quote from an equally long speech from a famous hall monitor). By the time he's finished, class is over without him actually performing his actual duties.
- Former Cuban leader Fidel Castro was infamous for doing this, his longest speech on record in Cuba clocking up seven hours and 10 minutes at the 1986 Communist Party Congress.
- V. K. Krishna Menon's 1957 speech defending India's actions in Kashmir is listed in the Guinness Book of Records as the longest speech delivered at the United Nations, Menon almost made it to the eight hour mark when he collapsed on the podium. The longest speech at the general assembly was given by Fidel Castro (who else) in 1960, clocking in at 4 hours and 29 minutes. It was said that the delegates spent most of the speeches' run time carefully planning out everyone's lunch schedule so that too many people don't accidentally leave at once and break quorum.
- The runner-up is Muammar Gaddafi's incomprehensible 2009 address to the UN General Assembly, it consisted of 100 minutes of pure gobbledygook. One of the interpreters passed out from exhaustion. The Assembly generally adheres to a strict 15 minutes time limit for its speakers, but in the case of Castro and Gaddafi, trying to enforce that was judged to be more trouble than it was worth.
- Third-world dictators during the Cold War in general were noted to be fond of this trope. One of the most egregious abusers has to be Kenneth Kaunda, first president of Zambia, who would not only make several speeches running up to five hours long every year, but would also broadcast them on the country's lone television channel. Suffice it to say, those Zambians who did have access to televisions were not pleased.
- As a bit of subversion,Stalin generally gave brief speeches (except for the Central Committee reports, which are by tradition quite detailed). Unfortunately, the speeches are liberally sprinkled with applause cues. As everyone's too afraid to be the first person to stop applauding, each round of ovations can last a good ten minutes.
- In Older Than Radio days, live speeches and debates were a form of public entertainment. In the Lincoln/Douglas debates each candidate spoke for 90 minutes. Also, the now stereotypically bombastic oration was necessary before the invention of loudspeakers.
- That began to change with Abraham Lincoln making such an impression with his Gettysburg Address taking just two minutes that the featured speaker of the occasion, Edward Everett, praised him in writing for an eloquently concise speech.
- Incidentally, Everett spoke for a little more than two hours.
- Boston Mayor Big Jim Curley famously said that his rhetorical technique was to first tell the audience what he was going to tell them, then tell it to them, then tell them what he had told them.
- This was how much of the nation was first introduced to Bill Clinton.
- Clinton was first brought in to deliver the keynote speech at the 1988 Democratic National Convention; where he was supposed to officially place Democratic Presidential nominee Michael Dukakis' name in nomination. Instead, Clinton went on a 32 minute speech; well past the 20 minute time limit; resulting in many of the delegates showing their boredom as Clinton droned on. In the end, the only applause Clinton would get was when he said "In closing".
- The 1992 Democratic convention saw then-nominee Clinton's speech run for just over an hour.
- Averted in his first inaugural address; which Clinton later joked about its brevity at just under 15 minutes.