Video Game: Ultimate Crab Battle
Flash game by Felix Weisner, available here
The player controls Bobbeh the magical shark and his boy companion
(unnamed) in an Underwater Boss Battle
fight to the death against their mortal enemy, the Giant King Crab
, in the final-est climactic-est ultimate-est final battle to ever come at the end of anything. The eponymous crab pulls out every stop in this fight, attacking with lasers, swordfish, electrified spikes, helmeted jellyfish, fast-growing coral, and increasingly overelaborate attack sequences, each one sillier than the last. It is, quite simply, a parody of the bombastic, flashy, theatrical Final Boss
battles in many recent videogames.
Has nothing to do with this.
In the blue coooorner (Bobbeh & boy tropes):And, in the red coooorner (Giant King Crab tropes):
- Authority Equals Asskicking
- Big Bad
- Chainsaw Good: his final special (after which he loops back to the first one if still not dead) uses two rows of chainsaw teeth with occasional conveniently placed gaps.
- Crosshair Aware (his eye beam)
- Crowning Musicof Awesome: the main theme is probably the most epic thing you'll ever hear in a flash game.
- Everything's Squishier with Cephalopods: one special summons a swarm of squids in helmets.
- Eye Beams (just one giant eye)
- Giant Enemy Crab
- Faceless Eye (his eye transformation)
- Flunky Boss: the Crab has random electric eels coming to shock you occasionally. He also doubles as a Mook Maker himself since a few of his specials summon diverse mooks, and the only attack he will use multiple times in the battle is the summoning of an small walking robot with a separate healthbar which tries to shoot you with plasma bolts.
- Hammer Space: even worse than Bobbeh and his boy in that sense. Is there anything he doesn't have stored within his body?
- Humongous Mecha (the AT-AT he summons at the start)
- Invulnerable Minor Minion (the electric eels)
- Instant Bandages (when he dies)
- Kaizo Trap: when you kill the Crab, you are immobilized for his ending cutscene, but you do NOT receive invulnerability. Thus, if you kill the Crab but leave one of his walker robot minions alone, you will keep standing in one spot as the Crab begins his monologue and the walker stands right underneath you, blasting you with plasma beams and eventually killing you. This fact has been discovered empirically. You can die during the ending cutscene. I Wanna Be the Guy much?
- Lightning Gun: averted with his lightning herse... then played perfectly straight with his electric Wave Motion Gun later on.
- Luck-Based Mission: Some of his attacks can become this coupled with the random electic eel appearing. Standing in a spot waiting for his electric herse or the coral attack to end? Electric eel comes, no space to dodge, you're dead. Spinning around for your life during the Pearl move? Electric eel comes, no possibility to dodge, you're dead. Trapped between the chainsaw blades? Electric eel comes, no space to dodge, you're dead.
- Marathon Boss (set aside seven minutes, dear reader)
- Musical Assassin: his second special
- My Death Is Just the Beginning (or so he says)
- Nothing but Skulls: adorn his crown.
- Pull a Rabbit out of My Hat (one of the ways he summons mooks)
- Power Crystal (of course, it has to be a power pearl)
- Psycho Electric Eel
- Reflecting Laser (the machine gun's orbs)
- Shout-Out - Star Wars (the AT-AT and the Stormtrooper lookalike swordfish), Rambo (machine gun), Saw (the puppet on the TV once you defeat him)
- The giant fortress in the background is suspiciously similar to Doctor Wily's signature Skull Fortress.
- Spikes of Doom
- Story-Driven Invulnerability (while he's using a ridiculously long attack, you can't deliver the final blow)
- Up to Eleven: How many special attacks can be crammed into one boss battle? How wacky can those attacks get? How many culture references can be made by one boss?
- Wave Motion Gun
...But, funnily enough, NOT: