To go along with The History Channel's Network Decay, Ancient Aliens is a program that deals with conspiracy theories about aliens. Taking a glance at a list of episodes reveals that — as far as this show is concerned — aliens did everything.The show is known for having frequent appearances by Giorgio A. Tsoukalos, consulting producer and ancient astronaut researcher. More specifically, it's known for the involvement of Giorgio A. Tsoukalos' hair.
This show provides examples of:
Agent Mulder: Many of the experts, but particularly Giorgio, who appears in every episode and seems to think aliens are responsible for every aspect of human history and beyond.
All Myths Are True: Albeit aliens were involved with all of them. Yes, all of them — an episode involving the Crystal Skulls (which have been thoroughly debunked) explored the idea of them having mystical science powers or alien knowledge encoded in them, and somehow managed to link them to the Nazis, Atlantis, the Dali Lama, and Native American mythos. That's just how absurd the show can be when it tries. A 2014 commercial for the series even directly states "Aliens were part of everything. Now you know."
Ancient Astronauts: Prescribes to this, using scripture and myths. Pretty much any instance of gods, angels, demons, spirits, etc, was ancient people meeting aliens and misunderstanding them.
Blatant Lies: The entire show. All the lies and deception are picked apart by Ancient Aliens Debunked. Notable is presenting 19th and 20th century New Age texts as ancient texts, deliberate mistranslations, deliberately presenting false dates, not citing actual sources, quote mining, and presenting hoaxes as true (such as the infamous Crystal Skulls). All and all, the show is one big lie that is getting far, far too much attention.
Dan Browned: A staple of this show. About ten minutes research on some of the subjects they cover will turn up evidence that they're twisting facts, if not outright lying.
Early-Installment Weirdness: The series is actually a Spin-Off from a one-off documentary that presented a much less biased examination of the Ancient Astronaut theory; both proponents and detractors were interviewed. Myths were not presented as evidence. Artistic licence and symbolism were acknowledged. Ironically, by presenting it as a two-sided argument with evidence against it as well as for it, it makes the whole thing seem more reasonable.
E.T. Gave Us Wi-Fi: Along with a good chuck of technological innovations throughout history.
For the Evulz: Aliens apparently cause volcanic eruptions and earthquakes. Why they're doing it and what they would have to gain from doing it isn't known or dwelled upon in the show.
The Great Flood: The show takes the Noah's ark story as the literal truth. But aliens did it.
The Grim Reaper: According to the show the black death was caused by Grim Reaper aliens with plague scythes. Seriously.
1. If aliens really existed and visited Earth, they could theoretically have shown humans how to build pyramids.
2. Humans built pyramids.
3. Therefore aliens!
Once per Episode: At some point during any given installment, the phrase "as ancient astronauts theorists believe/contend/theorize" will be uttered at least once. This functions more or less as a disclaimer or possibly a Catch Phrase.
No Sense Of Distance: Aliens come from stars tens to hundreds of light years away to mine gold (a relatively common metal in asteroids) on Earth, where the total ammount of gold mined in the entirety of Earth's history was estimated as of 2011 to be about 171,300 tonnes - enough to form a cube just over 20 meters to a side.