Just as a soldier should never aid his enemy, writers should never help a critic write a disparaging review. Also, as a general rule, critics have a tendency to make terrible puns, so when deciding on a title writers ought to steer clear of ones like "It’s A Disaster!" and "10 Things I Hate About You".
They're really setting themselves up by adapting a book with that title. Just imagine how many critics will use the headline "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Movie — and the Sequel Really Is Never Quite As Good! LOLOLOL"
—A message board user on the film adaptation of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Phil: That sure was random!
Cinema Snob: Thanks for reviewing the movie while being in the movie!
Cinema Snob: Thanks for reviewing the movie while being in the movie!
— The Cinema Snob review of A Talking Cat!?!
Cinema Snob: ...maybe something interesting will happen.
Computer: 0101110001...
Snob: Nope...in fact, the computer starts critiquing the movie itself.
Computer: Oh...this is boring. I hate it.
Computer: 0101110001...
Snob: Nope...in fact, the computer starts critiquing the movie itself.
Computer: Oh...this is boring. I hate it.
— The Cinema Snob review of Nukie
Mummy: And I don't need to tell you what a piece of shit that was!
Cryptkeeper (thinking): No, you don't... I know what a piece of shit it was!
Brandon: Hey come on, guys! We are still at the beginning, wait until the end to talk about the movie!
Cryptkeeper (thinking): No, you don't... I know what a piece of shit it was!
Brandon: Hey come on, guys! We are still at the beginning, wait until the end to talk about the movie!
—Brandon's Cult Movie Reviews, while reviewing Bordello of Blood
Nicolas Cage/Malus: Every time I turn my head, there's something that doesn't make any sense!
Phelous: Well, if you're just gonna review the movie yourself, I guess I am not needed here! (leaves)
Phelous: Well, if you're just gonna review the movie yourself, I guess I am not needed here! (leaves)
—Phelous' review of The Wicker Man (2006)
"My god, it's like its own autopsy about why it failed!"
—Todd in the Shadows, Trainwreckords: Van Halen III
Mai Himuro: (reading one of Yuu's novels) "It's not the least bit entertaining, the composition has an oddly affected tone, and, well, its biggest problem is its lifeless characters."
Nick Dupree (ANN reviewer): "It's a real problem when you're a bad writer trying to make fun of bad writing. You inadvertently give chucklefucks on the internet the perfect ammo to make fun of you."
Nick Dupree (ANN reviewer): "It's a real problem when you're a bad writer trying to make fun of bad writing. You inadvertently give chucklefucks on the internet the perfect ammo to make fun of you."
— Anime News Network, "What the Hell is Happening in
My Sister, My Writer?"
My Sister, My Writer?"Anastasia Steele: (to Christian Grey) It's all wrong. All of this is wrong.
Epic Voice Guy: That's exactly what I've been saying!
"Words aren't cool!", says one of the high schoolers, and he has a point; just look at the script.
— Matt Prigge, review of The Emoji Movie for Metro (US)
A lot of jokes will be made over the film’s title, but to say The Disappointments Room is disappointing would imply that there were high expectations in the first place.
Here's a tip, if you're going to make one of the worst-sounding albums of all time, don't make it easy for the critics by putting the word "Crap" in the title, like The Clash did with their career-ending final album.
Laureline: It's our mission that doesn't make sense, sir!
Jeremy: Well, at least I'm not the only one who thinks so.
Jeremy: Well, at least I'm not the only one who thinks so.
Saphira: I'm losing strength!
Jeremy: Thing I said 20 minutes into the film somehow makes it into the climactic dialogue!
Jeremy: Thing I said 20 minutes into the film somehow makes it into the climactic dialogue!
— CinemaSins on Eragon
Editor: I never thought about it before. But now that I have, I still don't care. Does anything exciting happen?
Linkara: Do I even need to be here? The editor seems to be doing just as well without me.
Linkara: Do I even need to be here? The editor seems to be doing just as well without me.
— Atop the Fourth Wall, on Marville #6
We gave you six years and millions of dollars, and you gave us nothing.
—A line of dialogue from, and the fan reaction to, Fantastic Four (2015)
Memorable Dialogue: Eddie points out the inappropriateness of Venom's actions, and also inadvertently reviews his own movie: "That was abusive."
— John Serba, review of Venom: Let There Be Carnage for Decider
The Drake album is called Honestly, Nevermind, which... [sighs] Man, I hate when artists write my punchlines for me. Let me work for it at least.
One: the number of stars I award to this boring, listless anime.
— Carlos Ross on the non-hentai OVA of One: Kagayaku Kisetsu e
on the non-hentai OVA of One: Kagayaku Kisetsu eFittingly enough, a song titled 'Whistle' totally BLOWS!
If this is where country and pop meet, then they should not have met in the middle, and I certainly hope it's not meant to be.
— Todd in the Shadows, Pop Song Review: "The Middle" by Zedd & Maren Morris / "Meant to Be" by Bebe Rexha
So let's check out the album closer, 'U Hate It'. Oh, boy, I bet I do!
— Todd in the Shadows, Trainwreckords: "Funstyle" by Liz Phair
I need Oppenheimer to perform badly at the box office. Not because I have anything against Christopher Nolan. But because I desperately need the headline "Oppenheimer Bombs" to exist.
— UltimaShadowX on Twitter
There's a moment in episode two on And Just Like That... Season 2 when Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker) refuses to read a certain bit of corny ad copy promoting a vaginal wellness product on her podcast, saying, "No human being speaks like that!" It's ironic, really, because that's the main flaw I'm finding throughout this new season of AJLT.
—Liz Kocan, Decider
The album was called No Fixed Address, and fittingly, the result was the most all-over-the-place record they ever made.
—Todd in the Shadows, Trainwreckords: "No Fixed Address" by Nickelback
Since all of these factors didn't mesh well together, we think Disjointed was the perfect title for this underwhelming sitcom.
—WatchMojo, "Top 20 Worst TV Shows of the Century (So Far)"
