Quotes from works
"Speedin' 'till tomorrow
I'm drinkin' 7-up 7-up"
— The song "Speedin' 'Till Tomorrow" from The Batterys Down note
"Now I gotta give a Shout-Out to Seagram's Gin
'Cause I drink it, and they paying me for it."
— Petey Pablo, Freek-A-Leek
"I love that installs take so long
It gave me time to write this song
I've totally not been paid
I would never take a bribe
Like my vid and please subscribe
I have not been paid"
Radar operator: (looking at Dr. Evil's returning spaceship) It appears to be in the shape of Bob's Big Boy, sir.
Cdr. Gilmour: My God. He's back.
Radar operator: Well, in many ways, Bob's Big Boy never left, sir. He's always offered the same high quality meals at competitive prices.
Cdr. Gilmour: Shut up.
Wayne: [holding a bag of Doritos] Maybe I'm wrong on this one, but for me, the beast doesn't include selling out. Garth, you know what I'm talking about, right?
Garth: [wearing Reebok wardrobe] It's like people only do these things because they can get paid. And that's just really sad.
Wayne I can't talk about it anymore; it's giving me a headache.
Garth: Here, take two of these! [Dumps two Nuprin pills into Wayne's hand]
Wayne Campbell: Ah, Nuprin. Little. Yellow. Different™.
Benjamin: Look, you can stay here in the big leagues and play by the rules, or you can go back to the farm club in Aurora. It's your choice!
Wayne [holding a can of Pepsi] Yes, and it's the choice of a new generation™.
Bugs: Is it a mirage, or just product placement?
Daffy: Who cares? With shopping convenience at such low prices! Water! Fresca! Mountain Dew! Your product name here! Woo-hoo-hoo!
DJ: (to Kate) Is this your idea?
Kate: The audience expects it. They don't even notice this kind of thing anymore.
Bugs: Nice of Wal-Mart to provide these Wal-Mart beverages in return for us saying "Wal-Mart" so many times.
"The other day, I was eating delicious Cowboy Burgers at Applebee's with my friends, when somebody pointed out to me that advertising is getting more and more intrusive. Then I took a sip of my ice-cold Pepsi."
Carl Weathers: I’m gonna go get a new soda. Hey, did you know that you can get a refill on any drink you want here, and it’s free?
Tobias: It’s a wonderful restaurant! Mmm!
Narrator: It sure is!
— Arrested Development, "Motherboy XXX"
Quotes on works
"In 1977, Hostess started an ad campaign that featured superheroes fighting crime with fruit pies, Twinkies and cup cakes. As you might imagine, they were insane. Mega-powered beings were facing off against criminals whose plans fell apart every time someone tossed them a snack... Now that I think about it, why are 60 Twinkies the only thing that Wonder Woman carries in her purse? I guess a comic writer thought about a woman's needs and only came up with 'unsaturated fat and dick shapes.'"
"I rewrote for CBS my screenplay for The Catered Affair which MGM had originally made with Bette Davis. Although everyone I dealt with at the network 'loved' the screenplay it seemed I was insufficiently artful in creating the forty-four or so commercial breaks (usually done after the film is made). This was the extent of everyone's interest and expertise. In the end, I suggested that they might be better off not doing movies at all—I think they may have taken me seriously because for a time they did abandon producing slices of movie filler to separate the commercials from each other, the only object of their peculiar enterprise."
—Gore Vidal, Point to Point Navigation
"It's as if the texts themselves have been downsized: The whole point of this is to get people to watch our show and patronise our catering service, so let's just cut out the middleman and make everything about forcibly coercing consumers to buy our shit... Here Discovery is not just trying to get us to watch the show or use a certain food service, it's overtly selling a cult of personality built around Kari, Grant and Tory, who are now little more than mascots pitching not only their own show (while that selfsame show is still physically airing), but Microsoft, Geico, Deadliest Catch and themselves all at once."
—Soda Pop Art, "I Don't Buy It — Commercials as Narrative and Social Entropy"
"I'm fairly sure Subway paid for placement, since they scored one Subway sandwich eaten outside a store, one date in a Subway store, one Subway soft-drink container, two verbal mentions of Subway, one Subway commercial staring Happy, two verbal mentions of Subway, a Subway T-shirt, and a Subway golf bag. Halfway through the movie, I didn't know what I wanted more: laughs, or mustard."
"It might be the first time a fight scene has made me thirsty for a Big Gulp™."
"Catwoman does some super-awesome dancing in strobe lights to impress the dude who killed her...Then they fight outside, amongst some Bud Light boxes. I swear to God, every company that paid for product placement in this movie deserved double that back for the damage to their brands it probably caused."
"In the ‘80s, product placement was seen as the Next Big Thing, particularly after Hershey reaped a massive windfall from putting Reese’s Pieces in a certain Steven Spielberg movie. Indulging in the usual corporate boneheaded “synergistic” thinking, Coca-Cola executives figured that if paying to put Coke products in movies was good for business, owning their own movie studio and getting free product placement would be even better! Right? Right?
The Coke execs quickly realized after Leonard and Ishtar stiffed (along with the shamefully brand name-stuffed Mac and Me) that making hit movies is a lot harder than marketing syrupy bubble water, and they got out of the game soon after. But this means that Leonard Part 6, one of the lasting testaments to this “synergy”, is packed so full of blatant product placements that all you can do is sit and stare in abject horror."
"Lucas cracks out an armored case with his name on it. He opens it to reveal a padded, velved-lined interior on top of which rests...the ultimate gaming peripheral. The Exaclibur of controllers. The mightiest weapon in any gamer's arsenal. The Power Glove. That's right, the Power Glove is not meant to be exposed to the elements. It must kept sealed away, lest untrained hands damage it or mishandle it. The devastation could be immense! It must be kept under lock and key at all times... The man wields the fucking Power Glove. Betta reccanize."
"Starring: Burger King! Panasonic! eBay! Cadillac! GMC! The Strokes! Pepto Bismol! XBOX! ...Furbies..? Pontiac! Mountain Dew! Chevrolet! Chevrolet! And Introducing... Chevrolet!"
Mike: Do you remember the part in Coneheads when they go to Subway?
Jay: Oh, you mean half the movie? Don't they have multiple scenes in the Subway?
Mike: Yeah, they do... Maybe I didn't even see the full movie. Uh, points to their product placement department, but the only thing I can think of is them eating Subway.
Matt: The thing I really notice now is how the delivery guy is from Domino’s...You’re in New York City. Domino’s, guys?
Chris: Maybe all the Famous Rays guys were sick of having to drop slices down a sewer grate.
"Hey. You guys. You want some ACCUVIEW?
People on Smallville use ACCUVIEW. They use it while driving their Old Spice Phantom Zone Ford Fusion.
Like Chloe says, quote, 'Accuview to the rescue!'...I hate product placement. Yeah, I know, it pays the bills. So TIGHTEN your story (as this one NEEDED) and give them an extra commercial or two. Don't make characters we love shills for your petty crap."
"The game's designers (and the products' PR departments) wanted to make damn sure you associated these endorsements with peak health of both body and mind. To that end, they turned chips and soda into power-ups that could restore your health and psyche, the latter being the game's measurement of how quickly your body can naturally heal itself. So they're essentially saying you will die if you don't rabidly consume those chips and soft drinks, but they don't stop there: Should you actually die with Doritos or soda in your inventory, they will bring you back to life. As far as Peace Walker is concerned, junk food is the new Jesus Christ."
"With such huge development costs, it's also important to remember that developers and publishers are pretty much forced to use such marketing tactics in order to simply pay the bills. So next time you're admiring Old Snake's gorgeous ass, you can thank Regain® for making it possible. MGS4 isn't even the first Metal Gear game to feature product placement! In Snake Eater players could find and eat CalorieMate® in order to regain stamina, at which point Naked Snake would say that it tasted great... Or if that isn't good enough for you, what about those Lucky Strike cigarettes in the old two-dimensional MSX games? They were supposedly Solid Snake's favorite brand!"
—Terry Wolf, "Metal Gear Soldout"
"JR is here to shill what an awesome movie this new Planet of the Apes is. Now we love Jim Ross as much as anyone, but this man is blatantly lying to you. Ain’t no way he ever plunked down money to see a movie with Marky Mark. No way."
"Hey, we're at Pizza Hut! This scene looks like it's right out of a bloody advert! In fact, the Pizza Hut logo is roughly in half the shots during this scene, mostly because it's right next to Sandler's bloody head so it's there every time it cuts to him. Oh, and maybe you want some Pepsi to wash that down with, because that's in almost all the shots in some way as well. There's one particular angle that manages to get both logos on display, just in case they weren't being transparent enough. [...] Now they can't even be bothered to lampshade it, because that requires effort. If they get any more shameless, they'll be selling ad space on Sandler's forehead! Not that it's that far away in this scene."