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"World Now Down To 5 Stories That Are Inspirational", written in the immediate wake of Real Life double amputee sprinter Oscar Pistorius murdering his girlfriend, is drenched in horrific cynicism about human nature — anything good anyone does will inevitably be negated by their failings or turn out to mask a horrible truth.
The one where both the reporter and the doctor suddenly lack any facial features, a clip of rotting flesh is shown, and the headlines indicate that you're in Hell.
WELCOME TO ETERNITY
NEXT UP: THIS IS HELL, AND YOU ARE THE DEVIL
In the Onion book "Our Dumb World" the page for the Democratic Republic of the Congo is pretty much the book's own Despair Event Horizon given how nightmarish everything about its recent history and current status is, and the few jokes made are exceedingly bleak and depressed, but this line in particular is just horrifying...