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Headscratchers: G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
Note to tropers: We've gone over the ice thing. Look for it before posting about it
  • When you only need a single nano-machine, why bother with the elaborate hijack? It should be child's play to sneak out a single machine for the owner and then just blow up the convoy and pretend it was stolen then.
    • One nanomachine takes apart objects one bit atom at a time. It take s a long time to take something apart one nano-machine at a time, even if it is self-replicating. You'd need a lot of them; if MARS could have made a viable weapon from a single nanite, they wouldn't need to use warheads loaded with the things.
    • Actually, it makes sense that they have to extract full-size warheads, as MARS doesn't have the particle beam to weaponize the warheads themselves. The nanomites need to be contined inside the warheads, as the warheads apparently do something or other to keep the nanomites from being insta-vaporized by the particle beam while it weaponizes them, so if they're going to have to use the warheads, they might as well use a fully loaded one.
  • Why weren't the two captured villains lined up against a wall and shot at the end? Given what they were attempting (murder on a scale of millions), I would think that even the most anti-death penalty countries in NATO would agree to make an exception. And once Russia and China found out about the missiles that had been targeted at their capitals, I'm certain they would throw their (not insubstantial) political weight behind an execution.
    • Because the movie was always thought up as an origin story, and thus Cobra Commander and Destro are needed for the already-planned sequel.
    • Because they were being held for the trial which was coming, Saddam Hussein wasn't killed in a night, there's got to be talking, lots and lots of talking. During which Zartan will get them free.
    • And because the most anti-death penalty countries in NATO don't make exceptions. Seriously, a lot of people think the assassination of Osama Bin Laden was wrong (understandable and forgiveable, but nonetheless wrong). Those opposed to the death penalty tend not to say "except for these guys"; they say "and sometimes I wish we could make exceptions". That said, the French might be a little more flexible than most.
    • And because the whole affair - private arms manufacturer manages to build massive army using incredibly advanced weapons without anybody noticing, then attempts to destroy three major world capitals for reasons that are not entirely clear (we know about Zartan, but the Joes don't) - is shocking, confusing, and a major failure of every significant intelligence agency on the planet. They're not going to kill Destro or the Commander until they understand how the hell it happened, what the objective was, and what else might have been going on.
  • When the villain threatens to kill his sister in Rise of the Cobra, why doesn't the main character call his bluff? Essentially, say, "You won't do it because if you do, I'll kill you and you value your life more." In fact, that bugs me about almost any movie hostage situation, the villain literally can't kill the hostage because it would mean their own death and villains always care most about their own lives. Why don't any heroes ever realize this?
    • They're the heroes, they can't take the chance that calling the bluff will make the villain snap and take out the hostage in a final act of revenge.
      • He's also clearly more than a little nuts at this point, and just might have done it, and then take advantage of Duke freaking out over his brainwashed fiancee melting before his eyes to make good his escape.
    • Look at it from the villain's perspective and it makes sense. I have the hostage. The hero might let me go if I threaten her life. If he does, I win. If he doesn't, I can kill the hostage and hurt him. I've lost nothing. If he doesn't let me go, I'm captured whether I kill her or not. The hostage taking is a effort taken in a situation where escape is not otherwise possible. It's not "she loses her value if I kill her" but, "I will kill her if YOU demonstrate she has no value to me alive."
  • There only being three nanomite warheads. I mean, the things reproduce endlessly and were programmed to only eat metal. What's stopping them from opening one warhead under controlled conditions in an all plastic/ceramic environment prior to weaponizing them and dividing the payload into multiple smaller packets? All you need is one Nanomachine, after all.
    • It is never stated that the nanomites are self-replicating. Self-replicating nanomachines are technologically speaking, a significant advance over non-replicating nanomachines, so it is not a given that they exist yet. There are also very good reasons for not allowing a weapon like that to self-replicate.
    • Washington, Paris, Moscow, wasn't there a fourth one that Snake Eyes shot down? These centers of the world would be destroyed then MARS can take advantage of the panic to take power, why would they want to destroy any more then they need to to get their goal accomplished? They're not Terrorists Without a Cause.
      • The other city being targeted was Beijing.
    • The off switch. Each packet of nanomachines has a different "stop eating now!" signal. If you split a supply and used it, then turned it off before it at the world, the other warheads you made by splitting the reserve would now be useless.
      • Storm Shadow shot one of the warheads at the Eiffel Tower in Paris to display their power, then they only had three left. The other three were used to target Beijing, Moscow, and Washington DC. Snake Eyes shot down the Beijing warhead and Ripcord shot down the Moscow and Washington warheads.

  • Storm Shadow is a Japanese ninja, everyone knows that. His name is Thomas Arashikage, though that's never brought up in the film. However, in the movie, he's played by two Koreans, and even speaks Korean, not Japanese.
    • You assume that just because the actors are Korean, then the character is Korean. In this very same movie, the American President is played by a Britishman. It's likely that the character of Storm Shadow is Japanese regardless of the nationality of the actors.
      • It's more than just nationality, he actually speaks the language. He doesn't speak a word of Japanese in the movie. Also, the promotion in Korea made a big deal over the fact that he was Korean.
      • The book of the movie and the script I saw actually refers to Storm Shadow as Korean; see a bit below for the rest of the confusion.
      • There are currently well over half a million Koreans living in Japan and hundreds of schools where Korean is the language taught and used in conversation.
    • I just assumed that a Ninja Dojo Master willing to take in and train a round-eyes westerner off the street after stealing food would have less problems with training a more traditionally minded Korean. For all we know, they had a multicultural outreach program. Really, what seemed most implausible about that to me was that A. there's a ninja dojo hidden(?) in the heart of Tokyo, and B. Snake Eyes was somehow orphaned(?) in the heart of Tokyo.
      • Interesting tidbit: The script at IMDB (obviously not the final film version) lists that dojo as being in Saigon. And the kid that would be Snake Eyes? Is French. Not sure if the Tokyo/Saigon thing is mentioned in the novelization or what, but if so, that means that a dojo in Vietnam produced a French ninja and a Korean ninja who joined up with an international paramilitary group and an international weapons-group/terrorist organization headed by (and funded by) a Scottish armsdealer and his Highland money.
      • That script called for Storm Shadow and Hard Master's dialog to be in Japanese. Perhaps the filmmakers figured regular audiences wouldn't tell the difference?
    • A: It's obviously not hidden and is probably just see as a martial arts dojo by outsiders. B: Foreign tourists bite the dust in a foreign country leaving their kid to wander around in a place where most people speak a different language, not all that surprising.
      • What bothered me was this, however - you're in the middle of the busy shop- (and probably restaurant-) filled Tokyo late at night desperately looking for food and the place you go to steal some... is a dojo full of martial artists and probably a few miles away? Also, how likely is it that some starved homeless child would viciously fight back when attacked after caught stealing by a skilled ninja-in-training - and for that matter, how did the master know that Snake Eyes was an orphan on sight as he must have if he offered to take him in? For all he knew, he could have just run away from home.
      • Well, he wasn't just "some starved homeless child." ...Well, he was all those things, but he was also the kid that was going to grow up to be Snake-Eyes. The fact that he does fight back is the point, and why the master took him in. Some people just won't back down from a fight, no matter how sensible that might be, and some people will deliberately aim high, even when a more mundane task would be easier and more profitable.
    • What bothered me was less the American / Korean ninja and more the fact that Kid-Who-Would-Be-Snake-Eyes was able to fight that way. Tiny!Storm Shadow had been trained since he could stand, so okay, but what are the odds a badass little kid would choose to pilfer the one martial dojo where he'd fight another badass kid and get clan-adopted? Did I miss a prequel comic here? A webisode? If so, links are appreciated. Was Snake Eyes' father a wandering American streetfighter looking to make a name in Japan? Is his real last name Masters?
  • Villain Ball: Cobra has Mind Control nanomites. Why use the big metal eating ones when they could just covertly infect the leaders of the world and start a nanomachine Zombie Apocalypse/invasion of the body snatcherts? I mean, they're nanomachines, a french kiss would be enough to spread the mind control.
    • McCullen was paying for the nanomites in the first place and he wanted revenge, both by destroying Paris and making the UN look bad for losing the nanomite warheads. It'd take a big chunk of nanomites in that kiss to work properly or a very long kiss as they slide in, I don't think the mind control ones replicate like the destroyer ones.
    • Because they are the villains in a live action movie aimed at children, based on an 80s cartoon series.
    • The mind control nanomites had to be injected while the victim was held still in a torture chair. Unless Cobra grabs them during a dental appointment, I don't see that being a working idea.
      • Hmm... that could work, actually. Dentist Conspiracy to take over world leaders, anyone? Just quietly kidnap and mind control every president's/prime minister's dentist, and give their office an "upgrade". Still, the problem this might have is that there seemed to be two types of mind control going on in the movie, "More Than Mind Control" (Baroness) and "Extreme Doormat" (Neo Vipers), so it's unclear if a mind controlled world leader who wasn't previously won over by Cobra couldn't use Heroic Willpower or Fighting from the Inside. The latter method would very quickly reveal the takeover.
      • The screwy thing is, opening up a dentist's office as part of a world domination would fit perfectly in 80s cartoon Cobra's usual mode of operations.
      • Especially since Doctor Mindbender used to be an orthodontist.
  • Once the warheads were weaponized, what's stopping the nanomites from eating through the casing?
    • Something in the firing mechanism sets them off. Weaponized =/= active. Weaponized just means they're ready to use as weapons.
    • The casing might well be glass all over, making the warheads "nanomite snowglobes". Since the nanomites seem to be programmed to only eat metal and ignore glass, concrete, and people, (NATO has some weird ideas about restricting collateral damage) an all glass casing would hold them until broken.
  • Nothing to do with the movie per se, but it just bugged me that I guessed wrong about the Baron. I thought he'd pull a switch, and pretend to arm all of the warheads while only doing so to one. Storm Shadow and the Baroness are clearly not nano-nuclear-rocket scientists, as long as the things looked glowy they'd assume it was a job well done. I figured it would have made an awesome scene for the Joes to fail to shoot down the last one... only for everyone to realize all the post Paris warheads were duds after nothing happens!
    • That's not Fridge Logic, which Headscratchers is about, that's an alternate scene. How would he know which one they'd use? Also the Baronness could probably read him like a book and know if he tried that.
  • Terrorists plan to use a WMD in Paris. An American team (I know, it's technically international, but we all know who's in charge) tries to stop them, and in the process causes a lot of collateral damage. Anyone else get a Team America vibe?
    • Parody, my good friend.
    • Once again not Fridge Logic, but there is a difference: The Team America example caused alot more damage than the bomb would have done while the G.I. Joe team managed to reduce the level of damage that would have resulted.
  • How didn't this get mentioned? At the end of the movie the cobra base is destroyed by falling ICE! WTH, last tme I checked ice can FLOAT!
    • I'll just quote from the main page on the Artistic License - Physics example:"Justified It's said on screen that there are tunnels in the ice. Presumably made of metal or concrete that would cause the ice to sink despite it's natural buoyancy." "Very nearly turned into Fridge Brilliance by Scarlett's comment roughly half a minute later, out-and-out mentioning the large quantity of metal lacing the ice directly above them."
    • If that had been the case it seems unlikely that the ice-pack would have been floating in the first place.
      • Not if it wasn't floating in the first place. They sink it by blowing out the support structure.
    • If the explosives were set up correctly, it's possible they cracked the ice at an angle that left a wedge of ice detached from its connection to the rest of the ice-pack. In which case, the concussive force might have pushed the wedge downward, rather than Hollywood Density being responsible.
  • Throughout the movie, those pulse weapons that the bad guys are carrying always make short work of the Joes - so why do they only use them occasionally and frequently rely on weapons which are demonstrably much less effective?
  • Surprising no one got this yet, but "Oh no, the Ice Pack is falling onto us" followed by "Let's take the Elevator up to the uhhhh, Ice Pack" Just strikes me as plain damn Stupid
    • Answer me this, where else are they going to go? All the escape vehicles are taken by the fleeing villains and I doubt they'd want to go for a dip in the Artic Water.
  • Why on earth weren't the Cobra pulse cannon blasts red?
  • Maybe I'm the only one confused by this, but why did the warheads have to be weaponized on the fly like that? Why weren't they already weaponized? They're warheads!
    • Security reasons, perhaps?
    • They're warheads that EAT METAL. Like, the things that carrying-cases and Humvees and weapons and buildings are made from? Not exactly something you want accidentally going off, or even intentionally going off beforehand (such as, say, having them stolen?). Probably the warheads were officially going to be weaponized post-delivery, or at least that was the plan before McCullen put his plan into effect.
    • True, but this troper would have simply had the nanomites in a bucket or something if they weren't ready to use. They could be fed into a weapons system once they're weaponized. But then they wouldn't be ready for firing. Eh, plot reasons.
    • They're weapons. They're already weaponised. This is different from armed.
  • The nanotechnology can do practically anything someone wanted them to do. Warheads, building super soldiers, controlling minds, healing....The man who invented them and is working on them doesn't even use them to fix his scarred face or his damaged lungs. The warheads are also described as consuming metal and continuing onward from there as long as there is metal. Cobra must hurry to the Eiffel Tower in Paris to fire the rocket instead of shooting it anywhere else and haveing the nanobots eventually get to the Tower and consume it then.
    • The healing factor and warheads are things nanotechnology could possibly do in the future, I'm doubtful about the mind control. The Doctor is nuts enough not to care about his face and lungs just like a typical cartoon villian, which everyone in Cobra MARS is due to being based on the GI Joe series. The Eiffel Tower attack was a symbol and an act of revenge by Destro, if he had wanted to just destroy the city he could have fired anywhere, but that wouldn't flip off France as much as hitting the tower first. Scarlett's Straw Vulcan dialogue has no such excuse however, whoever wrote all that needs to take some writing classes.
    • The breathing apparatus that kept the Doctor alive was partially made of metal. Until he's gotten the healing abilities of the nanomites refined to the point where they're 100% reliable, turning things that eat metal as their default function loose on himself wouldn't exactly be prudent.
  • When Snake Eyes was walking on his finger tips, didn't they mention that the alarms on the floor were pressure activated? Decreasing the area of contact will increase pressure not decrease it, if he wanted to decrease pressure he should have laid flat. Or am I misremembering the scene?
    • I think the idea was that there were pressure plates in the floor, and he was walking on his fingertips to avoid them, but I may be misremembering.
      • Watched yesterday. The little circles in the floor are the plates. Specifically, they said, "Anything larger than a quarter is going to get fried." Last I checked, quarters are usually larger than human fingers.
  • Why did Snake Eyes have to have that stupid mouth-fitting piece on his mask? What really bugs me is how Hollywood seems obsessed with showing the mouths on characters who are iconically defined by being mouthless. I really could not take Snake Eyes seriously in this movie every time they showed his face with that strangely dumbfounded expression frozen into his mouth. Also, it's in his mouth! That can't be comfortable. Similarly, Optimus Prime's faceplate. Optimus doesn't have a mouth. He doesn't need to have a mouth. I loved the designs in the first Transformers movie, especially Optimus, but why did they have to take away his faceplate? Bumblebee didn't have a mouth. And as a third example, we have Venom in Spiderman 3. We only get a couple of glimpses of his horrifically awesome visage before it's peeled away to show Topher Grace's goofy mug with those ridiculous fake teeth. It just bugs me.
    • Hollywood things Viewers Are Morons who'll forget who a character is if they don't see the face of a famous actor. And in the case of Snake Eyes, it could have been worse, the execs originally wanted him to talk.
    • It's not that they think people will "forget" a character, it's either that A. they want the characters to look more human, or B. they paid good money for the actor so they want to put his face on screen. Same reason for In Space Everyone Can See Your Face.
      • I thought it was because he was a Daft Punk fan, seeing as his helmet kinda resembles one of the duos.
    • It's a stylistic choice for that continuity. Roll with it.
      • If you must have something deeper: In most other continuities, Snake-Eyes lost his ability to speak due to damaged vocal cords. Ro C Snake-Eyes took a vow of silence after the death of his master. He wears the mouth-piece, forever closed, as a visual reminder of that.
    • From a design standpoint, it's because the most iconic Snake-Eyes toy, the 1985 version, had a sculpted mouth on his mask. It was even iconic enough that the 2002 and 2003 figures also sported a mouth on the mask.
  • The holograms. Always with the holograms. It wouldn't have been so bad if they weren't completely indistinguishable from everyone else in the scene until a very brief effects flash to let you know. I swear, when the Pit was under attack and Scarlett went back for her jacket and it flashed, I seriously thought (before realizing that it was the invisibility jacket) that it was a holographic jacket. Sure, it was just the invisibility suit, but the fact that I actually seriously entertained the thought that it was a holographic jacket should say something about the overuse of holograms in the movie.
    • Or their underuse. Think how much easier a time the Baroness and Storm Shadow would have had attacking Joe HQ and Paris if they'd had a few decoy holograms on mobile emitters to distract the Joes.
      • There's no indication in the movie that they have the technology to project convincing holograms from mobile emitters. The holograms are only ever shown in two rooms, both of these being crammed full of high-tech equipment, and they don't move very much in either scene. Making a working mobile emitter would be a much harder technical problem than making the tech work with a complex stationary setup.
      • Untrue. The very first use of a hologram in the movie comes after the first big fight scene with Scarlett and Snake-Eyes stopping the Baroness from stealing the weapons from the army. The Joe's use a very small, extremely portable hologram device to project their leader so he can talk to the soon-to-be-recruits.
      • And the camera panning sideways even a few degrees shows that the hologram is a flat projection that won't fool anyone looking at it for more than an instant. If its not looking at someone dead-on, that hologram will be obviously fake.
  • So MARS managed to build an elaborate Underwater Base complete with 3 ICB Ms without the Joes or anybody else noticing. It's only when they steal the nanites that the plot starts. What bugs me is that MARS never needed their super nanomachines for their plot to work. They would have caused global chaos just as well with ordinary nuclear warheads, which would have been far easier to steal, buy or even make themselves. Heck, they probably even had a few lying around if they really supplied 70some percent of the world's weapons.
    • They're COBRA or rather are going to be, they don't use nukes they use weird weather machine type stuff, the only wrong part about using the super nanomachines is that they didn't turn into giant nanite snakes and start smashing buildings.
    • I admit I'm not sure what the details would be, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was easier for McCullen to rig the theft of his own weapons than to steal someone else's nukes.
    • Nukes tend to be in highly-secured military bases. If MARS/Cobra attacked a military base, they'd be provoking the wrath of a major military superpower. Even with less-advanced technology, the kind of firepower such a nation can bring to bear would be a lot more than MARS/Cobra can deal with. On the other hand, attacking a small convoy protected by a single platoon of infantry, some humvees, and Apaches in the middle of Nowhereistan is a hell of a lot easier and won't invite massive retaliation.
    • Why use nukes, ruining large areas of the same world you want to dominate, when you have a weapon that can achieve similar results leaving no inconvenient radiations behind?
  • Why were the Joes locked up after the Paris attack? Since G.I. Joe is an international organization, it isn't a stretch for France to be a member nation. Any attempt to incarcerate the Joes would've been straighten out in 10 minutes with a call from the Prime Minister.
    • Well, for one they're a secret organization. For another, their chase trashed a good chunk of the city.
    • They're secret to the general public; there's no reason to believe they're a secret to the French government, especially if the Joes are an organization analogous to NATO.
    • Yes, but it's not the top French government officials that arrested them. It's the French police. And we're not given much indication of just how long they were incarcerated, plus, they are released promptly afterward. The reason they're banned from France is because, well, someone blew up half the city, and the French weren't in any position to actually punish the people actually responsible at that point.
  • After the Joes are arrested in Paris, resident techy guy Breaker (played by Saïd Taghmaoui) starts speaking to the French officials in English. Yelling English, to be exact; like the way people normally talk to foreigners. His character had been speaking in a subtly French accent throughout the entire movie, so I just kind of assumed he was Moroccan. THEY SPEAK FRENCH IN MOROCCO. WHY IS HE NOT SPEAKING FRENCH TO THEM?
    • Yes. He even begins in French before switching to English -it really doesn't make sense.
  • During Duke's flashback to East Africa, his team is shown running down an alleyway. They're shot at from the side, and don't turn at all. The timing is weird too—one second they're in front of the wall, one second they're not, then they're out and ducking behind a car. The entire time they've been shooting ahead, but with no targets, too—the only one that shows up can't be seen until they move to the right, where the hood is.
  • Of all the numerous conflicts between two-wheeled vehicles and those of the four-wheeled variety, a motorcycle has not yet won a fight, even if the car is going twenty-five in a roundabout.
    • Someone hasn't seen The Dark Knight. Batpod vs. 18-wheeler. Batpod wins. Also, uh...there's one part where a motorcycle is used in this movie, and the car it's up against is speeding the whole time and armed to the teeth. What is this JBM about?
      • During Scarlett's motorcycle sequence, she's very clearly hit by a car while she's driving, but in a clearly CGI moment, she's only shoved a little, and keeps on driving. It's supposed to be Bad Ass, but it just fries Willing Suspension of Disbelief for a moment and throws one out of the film.
  • When The Baroness and Storm Shadow take the captive Duke (and the Warheads) to their polar base, non of them are wearing any particular cold weather protection. Duke is wearing a T shirt, and The Baroness's cleavage is on display for all to see. And none of them seem to be cold. In the next scene in that hangar, Ripcord and Scarlett are wearing parkas (still inadequate, but its easily handwaved. Ripcord even shivers and states that its cold, even with his parka.Storm Shadow has badass, and The Baroness has liberal ammounts of appliedPhebetonium, but whats Dukes excuse?
    • Dude don't wanna look pansy in front of the hot babe. He's not the comic relief in this film!
  • I'm sorry... I don't normally go for the same jingoism as the rest of this country, but come on: it's Real AMERICAN Heroes!!!
    • Presumably, it would have been too Fridge Logic-inducing: much easier to accept a group having jurisdiction in your country if you have a stake in said group, and also easier to get an entire army of the best of the best if you have most of the world to draw on (easier to hide the budget for said army, too).
    • They didn't want to alienate a very large percentage of the potential audience for this movie. Can you imagine if it was any more 'unironic Team America'? There would be been boycotts.
    • Also from what I understand the cartoon was only advertised as "real American heroes" in America. we're out numbered.. :)
      • The cartoon was renamed Action Force in Europe, as was the toyline for a long time (followed by a transitional "GIJoe: The Action Force period) before settling on GIJoe: International Heroes, and a number of vehicles redid the stickers with Union Jack flags instead of American ones and numerous filecards were rewritten to make characters European, most notably Flint. In Brazil, the sub-title became "Soldiers Of Iron", in India it was "International Heroes", Canada and Japan avoided the sub-title altogether, and Canadian toys replaced American flags with Canadian ones, and had some filecards change the character's birthplace to a Canadian one. Making the Joe team an international one is just a logical progression from all this adaptation for varying markets.
  • Sorry, but there is no way I can accept that Duke was completely unable to freaking shoot the Baroness at point blank range. It's been four years, he's a trained soldier, he already knows that she's evil, and she's in the middle of stealing deadly nano weaponry. Saying that he's still in love is and that overrides all of his common sense reaches Ass Pull territory. Even if he couldn't shoot her between the eyes, nothing stopped him from shooting her in the leg, pistol whipping her in the face, etc.
    • It's actually really hard for people to shoot each other. It's one hell of a lot harder to shoot someone who you were very, very in love with. Why does every Troper seem to think that every protagonist has to be a heartless, ruthless, cold blooded son of a bitch all the time? Duke is a human being, and human beings tend to hesitate to harm people they love. How is that so hard to understand?
      • Because Duke is a soldier. Soldiers are trained to overcome human resistance to shoot others. Soldiers are trained to put aside personal feelings to make those shots. And they are also trained to know that hesitation can put themselves, their comrades, and their mission at risk. Duke knew that a highly-armed, highly-trained enemy combatant was going to steal extremely deadly weaponry and use it for a large-scale terrorist attack on civilians. If Duke can't put aside his feelings to stop that sort of threat, he's got no business being a soldier, much less a GI Joe. (And like I said, if he couldn't shoot her, nothing is stopping a good pistol-whip to the face.)
      • He's a soldier, yes, but he's also a human being. Yes, soldiers are trained to overcome human resistance to shoot others. That doesn't mean they turn into emotionless automatons that shoot anyone and everyone that they deem a threat, especially if the 'target' is someone they were at one point (and may still be) in love with. Also, take into account that this is the first time he's even seen her in years, and when he had last seen her she was a civilian. Just the sheer surprise of not only seeing his ex-fiancee, but seeing his ex-fiancee in that situation, is certainly enough to give him pause if only to go "WTF, mate?" They train soldiers to overcome their emotions, but they're still there, and something sufficiently emotionally charged, or just plain confusing, is going to give them pause. I imagine just about any soldier would balk at shooting at a child, for instance, even if that child was a direct, immediate threat.

        Also, he didn't know they were going to use it for "a large-scale terrorist attack on civilians." They didn't exactly stop and explain that while they were swiping it, after all. It was certainly a possibility, a likely one at that, but it was just as likely to be industrial espionage or some nation wanted it for its own military.
      • There are plenty of criticisms to be had against Duke not terminating Baronness, on the grounds he is a soldier...but it can be lampshaded by Ruleof Drama.
  • Ripcord just suddenly figuring out how the Vipers found the Pit. It wasn't even presented in a reasonable way; like Ripcord saying - "Uh, are you really sure that transmitter wasn't on?" and letting the train of logic flow from here. No, he just walks up and says that it was obviously on and Mc Cullen must've been the one who did it. It's even worse considering that Ripcord is still a newbie to this sort of espionage.
    • Lateral thinking. He might've seen a case lying around, had a Creek Moment, went to one of the techs, asked them if the transmitter was off, they figured it out, and he told the rest of the Joes personally.
    • On that same account, how is it possible that with all the high-tech equipment in the Pitt, none of the instruments seemed to notice an outgoing and unauthorized signal powerful enough to be tracked from deep underground?
      • Same reason MARS didn't notice. You know how hard it is to track down a specific signal you don't know exists if you're not looking for it, especially in a location with lots of other radios and stuff?
  • Uh, why didn't MARS disable the transmitter or put the warheads into a new case once they recaptured it? Wouldn't it be an obvious security risk to be secretly carrying around something that has a transmitter that the Joes already know about?
    • They underestimated the good guys' intelligence; the Joes may be a highly-trained, special mission force, but the MARS people were overconfident after just having stolen in front of their noses.
    • Watch the movie again. They had disabled it. Duke switched it back on when he feigned his escape in the arctic.
  • Just what were 'Pulse weapons' suppose to be anyway? Lasers? plasma cannons? rail guns? all the other tech was loosely based of real world stuff. So to have Cobra randomly whip out Ray Guns seems a little... egregious.
    • The pulse weapons were very, very obviously not lasers (y'now, not looking anything like lasers at all) they weren't plasma weapons (again, not resembling plasma weapons at all) and definitely not railguns (again, not resembling railguns at all). And what the hell do you mean, "all the other tech was loosely based on real world stuff"? We don't have nanotech warheads that even vaguely resemble the nanomite technology, let alone the other gear MARS and the Joes have. They're obviously futuretech weapons like the nanomites.
      • The thing is that everything else was plausible tech rating fairly high on the Mohs Scale of Science Fiction Hardness; power armor, optical camouflage, supersonic troop transports, etc. Even the nanotech was really damned limited: not LOL NANNITES - they require unique power sources (supercollider to arm them), can't replicate infinitely(which is why you need a football-full to vaporize the Eiffel Tower), and have to be programmed for specific tasks ahead of time. Even the cybernetic interfaces are based on current designs - just a decade or so ahead of the SOTA, which is enough that the military could have all that stuff either in late development or in the hands of super-units like the Joes IRL RFN. But MARS has freaky rayguns? That can shoot missiles out of the air? The same power sources in the accelerator suits would power energy weapons, but we haven't even a basic theory behind how to make Star Wars blasters.
  • At the end, after getting Destro-ized by Cobra Commander, McCullen says, in an awed voice, "I've finally taken my place in a long line of McCullens," sounding strangely pleased to have a new metal face like his thirteen-greats grandfather. However — it's been a while since I last saw the movie, but I think this is right — he feels his face a moment later and says, sounding more horrified and outraged, "What have you done to me?!" Since I assume he wasn't celebrating being defeated like the original Destro at first, what was he talking about?
    • One or both of the following: realizing he couldn't take his new "face" off, or that the man who routinely brainwashes people with More Than Mind Control just happened to have a free product sample tailored just for him on hand and injected him with it. He probably realized his new face came with a side order of something he wouldn't like just as Cobra Commander demonstrated his remote control Agony Beam.
    • In this troper's opinion, he didn't so much sound pleased as shocked. Sort of "Holy hell, now I'm just like my ancestor oh my HOLY HELL WHAT THE..."
      • It looked more like: Phase 1 - Holy shit this hurts! Phase 2 - Hey this metal face thing is kinda cool! Phase 3 - OH MY FUCKING GOD MY FLUNKY CAN CONTROL MY MIND!
  • After the nanobots are nearly stolen at the start of the film, the Joes deduce that there was either a tracking device or a spy. Minutes later Duke mentions that he knows the leader of the team that attacked the security detail. Yet, it raises no suspicions that the leader of the security detail (Duke) was engaged to the attacker. It could be argued that they trusted him since he gave the information about her identity willingly. However, this was only after they explained that they would match her against every picture ever. It could well be that Duke tells them now rather than wait for the picture of them dancing to surface. Rather than even question him they train him, and let him in on nearly all there secrets.
    • Hawk scouted Duke several years earlier and knows he's loyal and dedicated enough for the Joes. More importantly, they know that Duke was fighting against the MARS troops and Duke recovered the case from a MARS agent. If he was a MARS agent, he would have let them take the case. Mistrusting Duke would have been ignoring the evidence that he was on their side.
    • Or maybe they did assume he was involved with the nanite-thieves, and took him into their apparent confidence in the full expectation that he'd betray them at the first opportunity, thus leading the Joes to his accomplices. They had few other leads to explore, so might've taken the risk that they could keep him under surveillance without him knowing until he contacted his ex. But he really wasn't involved, so having invited him and Ripcord in as part of a mis-aimed sting operation, they had to keep him.
  • Every time I read about the Paris catastrophe, it's all about collateral damage and the French being pissed off at losing the Eiffel Tower. Nevermind that the tower is essentially one of the most visited tourist attractions in Paris and would have held thousands of tourists inside when it collapsed. Imagine if a film was made where most people would be pissed off at losing the Twin Towers with no mention of the people trapped inside?
    • I think "thousands" is a little high of an estimation for people in the Eiffel Tower. It wasn't a populated office building, it's mostly rails and support beams, with a restaurant in it somewhere. I imagine it would have, at most, a hundred, maybe two hundred or so people in it at any one time.
      • Also, Breaker mentions during the chase that the Tower's being evacuated.
      • It still doesn't cut it. I've been to the Tower. On a windy winter day, there were several hundreds of people on the first floor alone (the restaurant was packed full), maybe three hundred on the second floor, and countless people using the stairs (I didn't get to see the third floor). There are no ways to evacuate that many people quickly the slow-moving elevators can only take in around three dozen people at a time, and it took me over half an hour to get out of there using the stairs (which weren't packed with a panicked crowd, which would be the case in an urgent evacuation).
      • People don't necessarily know that. If you asked most Americans, or non-French, who haven't actually been there, they'd probably think it was just a tourist attraction that doesn't have hundreds of people in it at any one time. Maybe it was just a really slow day in the movie.
  • How does Daniel even have his title in the fist place? I mean, the French kicked their monarchy to the curb over 200 years ago and maintained quite a distaste for hereditary nobles for quite some time after. Even if he were descended from French aristocracy, how can the title still be in use, even if it's a meaningless one?
    • Its probably just a nickname.
    • Or their history has bigger differences from ours than it would initially seem to.
      • Or not. To summarise the link Napoleon I created a whole bunch of noble titles after crowning himself Emperor. Then after the rest of Europe got together to kick his ass the House of Bourbon was restored to the French Throne and subsequently restored many of the older titles as well and while France returned to a Republican form of government titles of nobility were never officially abolished again, even if the legal privileges surrounding them have been reduced to be pointless. So yes, he could be a real, French baron, no problems.
  • There was no apparent reason for Baroness to make the Heel Face Turn. Even more, if we remember her mind was controlled by nanobots.
    • Were you not paying attention? It was pure Power of Love. She was in love with Duke, and quite clearly and explicitly fought off the nanobots. (I have a pet theory that she's just faking, but that's covered elsewhere).
    • It's possible that the Baroness's brainwashing wasn't as intense as that of the Neo-Vipers, as she needed to retain enough of a veneer of normal feelings and thought processes to fool people like her husband. Plus, the Doctor/Rex deluded himself into thinking he was helping her cope with grief, so probably wasn't as ruthless in cutting-and-pasting her personality as he might have been for somebody else.
    • Note also that she didn't really start to fight off the mind control until Duke got the stuffing kicked out of him in front of her.
    • correct me if I'm wrong (Haven't seen the movie in a while), but she was one of the first people to be infected. It stands to reason thar maybe the nanites then were a prototype, which made it easier for her to fight them off in the end?
  • During the cobra-venom demonstration of the nanomites' capabilities, why did the 'mites bother expelling all the venom out through the bite wound? If they're capable of healing wounds or altering Zartan's eye color, they ought to be able to denature the venom into harmless compounds right there inside the bloodstream.
    • It was probably more energy-efficient on the nanomites to carry the venom back out. That, and it made a more striking visual on film.
  • If the Joes knew that they were gonna attack the lab in Paris, why didn't they alert the French authorities to assist them or at least watch the lab?

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