Funny: Live and Let Die

Trooper: Now, J.W., this feller's from England, see, he's workin' in cooperation with our boys, he's a, a, secret agent.
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: Secret AGENT?!? On WHOSE SIDE?!?!?
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: WE GOT SOME BLACK RUSSIANS!
  • Kananga using Bond's compressed air bullets to over-inflate Whisper's couch.
    • Kananga's own death. It has to be seen to be believed.
  • "Butterhook."
    • An ad-lib by Roger Moore.
  • "By the power invested in me by this parish, I do hereby commandeer this vehicle and all those persons within. And that means you, smartass."
  • Felix Leiter (deadly serious): "Get me a make on a white Pimpmobile!"
  • When Bond draws The Fool from Solitaire's tarot deck, she quips, "You have found yourself."
  • M and Bond's bickering at the beginning of the film, including Bond's attempts to keep him from finding a VERY prominent Italian lady that he was sleeping with. A highly amused Moneypenny even joins in.
    • M's shock at Bond using his magnet watch to pull the sugar spoon from his plate and Bond's claim that the watch can deflect bullets. M wishes he could test that theory "right now."
  • Rosie Carver's freakout at finding a dead snake in the bungalow.
    Bond: Oh, I forgot! You should never go in there without a mongoose.
    • Promptly followed up by his deadpan reaction to finding a hat with a bloody chicken feather (a voodoo warning).
    Bond: It's just a hat belonging to a small-headed man of limited means who lost a fight with a chicken!
  • The sheer directness of Mr. Big's handling of Bond.
    Bond: My name is—
    Mr. Big: Names is for tombstones, baby. Take this honky out and waste him!
  • Bond tries to escape by commandeering a small plane, and a student pilot:
    Bond: Let's just wing it, shall we, Mrs. Bell?
Afterwards,
Leiter: [on the phone] Yes, Mr Bleeker. [listens] Yes, sir. I know you just can't glue the wings back on.